Dirt Road

by James Kelman

  No reply.

  Outside he closed over the room door. Declan’s in the shower, he said.

  Glad to hear it, said Dad.

  Murdo sat down on the chair and held the case on his lap, and opened it. The turquoise was inside. It was the turquoise. Murdo frowned at it, the turquoise. They had forgotten to change it. Joel should have done it. Joel had forgotten to. He should have changed it after the gig and he didnay. Joel was supposed to collect it and take it to the pick-up truck. Murdo had left the turquoise onstage with the other instruments. So he should have taken it. He did take it. He must have put it into the accordeon-case by mistake, and brought out Murdo’s own one. He must have brought out Murdo’s own one. How come? It’s the wrong accordeon, he said.

  What?

  It’s the wrong accordeon. Murdo shook his head and made to lift it out, but left it instead. Joel must have seen the pawnshop one when he opened the case. It was Murdo’s case, so when he opened it he must have seen the accordeon. So he had to take it out to put in the turquoise. So he took it out, then he put it in, the turquoise. Murdo stared at it. He looked at Dad. Dad, he said, they’ve gave me it. Dad…

  What?

  Dad. Murdo started greeting.

  Dad leaned over to him.

  Murdo clenched shut his eyelids trying to stop it he just couldnt stop it, couldnt stop bloody greeting. I’m just bloody greeting, he said, I’m just bloody greeting Dad always bloody greeting.

  Aw son dont worry. Dad put his arm round his shoulders. Dont worry.

  But Murdo was shaking with it and had to stop just bloody stop greeting, always greeting. I’m sorry Dad.

  Dont be, no; no son dont be I’m always bloody greeting.

  I’m always bloody greeting Dad I cannay stop bloody greeting just myself like Dad in the bloody bathroom I just start greeting, Dad, I’m just greeting all the time. All the time.

  Me too, said Dad. Me too. Jesus Christ me too. Dad was shaking his head.

  Murdo blew his nose. I just cannay get over it like I just I dont know what it is – just Mum I mean – and Murdo was greeting again. He stopped and blew his nose. Ah God.

  Dad was nodding his head.

  It’s Queen Monzee-ay. It’s her, she’s gave me it. She’s took mine and gave me hers. Murdo took another tissue from his pocket and blew his nose. I’m sick of greeting Dad I’m sick of it.

  Oh Christ.

  I’m not as bad as I was but it’s still bad. Are you the same?

  Yeah. Dad wiped his eyes.

  Murdo shook his head. Ye know like this, Queen Monzee-ay giving me the accordeon and you asking about how much ye get paid and like I know what ye’re meaning about last night too how I never got paid.

  But I wasnt meaning that. I wasnt meaning that.

  I’m only saying how maybe she got paid and we didnay, me and Gene and Sarah.

  But I wasnt meaning that!

  Yeah but

  I wasnt.

  I thought ye were Dad sorry. But it’s this side of music I like, where ye just meet people and become friends. Then ye dont see them again till maybe six months later like doing a gig and ye bump into them. And like all the stories about who played with who and all the old-time guys and the old-time events and festivals that all used to be there. It’s just special Dad, it doesnay matter who. But did ye see how he bowed to her, how he bowed to her?

  What?

  Diego. How he bowed to Queen Monzee-ay.

  Did ye not see him?

  No…

  Dad he bowed to her, Diego bowed to her.

  Dad nodded. He got up and turned away.

  *

  About 7.20 a.m. Murdo was hanging about the carpark area watching the entrance off the side street. He turned back to the motel. His backpack and accordeon-case were by the room door. Declan was on the same chair as last night, scribbling address information and contact numbers onto a notepage. He finished and stood to his feet. Okay Murdo!

  Declan gave him the notepage. Now that’s my address, that’s my email address and this here’s my cell phone number.

  Ye on Facebook?

  No son I aint and aint going to be. But I can sure pick up a phone, any time, offshore, inshore; any time. But if you got to come dont you wait. You come son, that is what you do. You leave a message and you just come.

  That’s great.

  Houston’s real close. You got your Atlas there huh? Declan grinned.

  Yeah.

  San Antone; you could walk it!

  The front door opened and Dad stepped outside; he listened while Declan was talking to Murdo: Where you’re going people dont worry so much. Like officialdom? Not once you’re in. It’s good down there. Good music, good food, good people. Dont worry like your age now that dont matter. You want to work you can work. Other stuff is trickier. Your Dad is right to worry there, but it’ll be okay, you’ll be okay. Declan glanced at Dad. He’s got friends here Tom.

  I hear ye, said Dad.

  Declan nodded. He gazed at Murdo and Dad, then he stepped a few paces to the side, got his cigarette pack and strolled down to the carpark area, lighting a cigarette as he went.

  Dad gave Murdo another notepage of instructions. I’m not being fussy, he said, it’s all numbers and stuff and ye’ll need it.

  Thanks Dad. Murdo stuck the page in his pocket.

  Be careful with it.

  Yeah.

  It’s all yer contacts!

  Okay Dad.

  Now phone Uncle John this evening Murdo ye buy a phone ye get connected and ye bloody phone, okay? Dad sighed.

  Definitely.

  We need yer address. So it’s the first thing ye do, okay?

  Okay Dad.

  Have ye got enough?

  Do ye mean like money?

  Everything.

  Yeah. Murdo shrugged.

  Like what? What have ye got?

  The basics.

  The basics?

  Yeah Dad the basics.

  Have ye got a change?

  Jeesoh.

  I mean like shoes and jeans?

  Yeah.

  Have ye? I thought ye had only one pair of jeans?

  I’ve got a pair of joggers.

  Have ye got another top?

  Dad

  I’ve got to ask these things, you forget.

  Dad the guys are going to give me a loan of clothes.

  A loan of clothes? A loan of clothes?

  Yeah. Murdo smiled.

  Dad stared a moment. He returned into the room.

  The traffic noises were loud now. Murdo looked towards the main road. A Sunday morning as early as this yet it was busy. Big trucks were there too, quite a line of them, wherever they all were going.

  Hey Murdo! Declan had glanced back at him, pointing at his wristwatch, then at the door into the room.

  Murdo nodded. He opened the room door. Dad was sitting on the edge of the bed. He looked up at Murdo. Okay?

  Yeah Dad.

  Dad smiled. Where did ye sleep last night by the way? I’ve been feart to ask.

  Well the bus was late in, coming from Baton Rouge, it was nearly midnight.

  So where did ye go?

  Eh well I had to walk it from the bus station, just looking about and so on because like Sarah and her family, I was supposed to be meeting up with them but because the bus was so late in it was too late. I got a place quite near the festival, not too far away, a wee grass square and with benches, and I got a bench; there was an all-night foodstall there too so it was like ye know, cups of tea and so on. I had a good meal there, fish and chips, it was good.

  Fish and chips?

  Yeah.

  So ye slept on the bench?

  Yeah.

  Right, ye slept on a bench.

  Well Dad it was too late for anything.

  Dad nodded.

  So… Murdo paused. He heard music, he glanced at the door a fraction before the knock. Declan called from outside: That’s Diego and the boys.

  Murdo grin
ned. Dad was watching him. It’s eh… Murdo gestured at the door and walked to open it. Dad got up from the bed and Murdo held the door open for him. Outside Murdo lifted his rucksack and accordeon-case. Dad moved to give him a cuddle. Take care now, he said.

  Of course.

  The two vehicles had parked in the carpark area and different music came from each. Murdo carried the rucksack and accordeon-case, walking to meet them. Dad and Declan followed. Dad said, Listen son they can give ye an address ask them for an address, they must know where they’re going.

  Murdo grinned at Declan.

  Seriously, said Dad.

  Santiago was driving the pick-up. Esteban was beside him, waved his hand out the window: Hey Moordo!

  Diego let down the window of the 4x4 and saluted Dad and Declan. Esteban got out the truck and took the accordeon-case from Murdo carefully positioning it in with the other instruments, luggage and equipment.

  Murdo reached to shake hands with Declan. Declan gave him a quick slap slap cuddle, then stuck some notes into a top pocket on his jacket. Murdo tried to shrug it off. Honest I dont need it!

  Declan growled: Hey boy, you pay me back sometime.

  Aw thanks Declan. Murdo smiled at Dad. Okay Dad?

  Yeah, said Dad. He palmed Murdo a small wad of notes.

  Aw Dad! Murdo grinned.

  Yeah aw Dad, he said. Make sure ye get that phone.

  Of course.

  Dad and Murdo shook hands again. Esteban opened a rear door in the truck and he got in there leaving the front passenger seat available. Santiago chuckled. Moordo!

  Murdo got in the front leaving the door open for Dad to speak. Vicenté and Roberto slapped him on the shoulder.

  Dad was saying, If ye can’t phone the night then phone tomorrow. Just dont worry about it. Dont let anything put ye off, never ever. Know what I mean son never ever.

  Santiago hadnt switched off the engine and now he released the handbrake.

  Dad said, Dont lose contact whatever ye do. Aunt Maureen will never forgive ye. Neither will I. Then yer passport. I dont know what to say about yer passport. If ye get it or leave it with Uncle John, ye just keep it in yer front pocket at all times and never ever take it out or leave it any place. Never.

  Santiago glanced at him and shrugged.

  It’s the most important thing of all, said Dad, it is just so so crucial son ye keep it in yer trouser pocket at all times. Never ever take it out or leave it any place. Know what I mean son yer passport’s yer passport. Never take it out yer pocket.

  Okay Dad.

  And phone phone phone.

  Right.

  Santiago was gazing at Dad, his foot on the accelerator pedal, the truck inching along.

  Dad nodded. Okay, he said and shut the door.

  Gracias, said Santiago.

  Murdo saw that Diego had got out of the 4x4 and Declan walked to meet him. Then Dad. They spoke together. Dad stood with his hands in his pockets.

  Santiago said to Murdo, Your father hey!

  Yeah.

  Santiago made a sad face, then shrugged like there was nothing to be done. Soon Diego was in his car and they were moving ahead. Santiago reversed out and set off after them. Dad standing there with Declan. Murdo waved. Santiago lowered the side window for him, and Murdo waved out in a better way. Dad and Declan walked after them, then stopped by the carpark exit. Declan was waving. Maybe Dad was. Murdo couldnt see properly in the side mirror. That was that. Santiago switched on the music, a good accordeon; kind of jaunty, probably Conjunto.