Doug and Carlie's Love Conspiracy (Doug & Carlie Series Book 2)

by Lisa Smartt

  “It is. Guess who’s going out with Jake Smith this Saturday?”

  “Well, I pray it ain’t you, cause you know I don’t take to that kind of nonsense, Carlie. I don’t.” She laughed.

  “Clara is coming up late Friday night. Jake’s pickin’ her up at 1:00 Saturday. So, looks like we weren’t such bad matchmakers after all. This might work out, Aunt Charlotte. And you and me, we’ll be on the front row of the wedding too.”

  She wrapped the thin gray sweater around her chubby middle as she put the cage down by an old metal chair. “Well, I figure this egg ain’t hatched quite yet so we best not count on the chicken.”

  “Oh, I know. I mean, it’s just one date. But still. It’s pretty good news in my book.”

  “It IS good news, Child! It is! And I think we should have a meatloaf sandwich in honor of it. I do. Oh, and some of them pickles too. Bart says them’s the best pickles he ever ate in his life. We must be real good pickle makers, Carlie. Good pickle makers and good matchmakers. The whole package.”

  We walked inside and Aunt Charlotte took off her sweater and said with a sigh, “Sad news about Dusty McConnell, Baby. Sad news.”

  “Oh, it’s heartbreaking, Aunt Charlotte. Do you know any more details?”

  Aunt Charlotte started pulling beets and pickles out of the fridge. She retrieved a loaf of Wonder Bread from the top of an old freezer that hadn’t worked in years. “Ricky’s cousin is a lawyer over in Martin. Says Dusty has declared his absolute innocence. Swears up and down he’s been framed. But Honey, ain’t nobody been riding with him in that old truck. Both of his work hands checked out clean. So it all points back at him. I can’t figure it out.”

  “I don’t know, Aunt Charlotte. I thought Dusty was on the straight and narrow.”

  “Me too, Baby. Me too. And he may be. What’s that thing they say…innocent till proven guilty.”

  “Yeah, you’re right.”

  Saturday 12:50 pm

  I knocked on the guest room door and provided a gentle admonition. “Okay, Clara! Get your tiny little rear out here and let’s see you!”

  Clara walked out wearing dark blue jeans and the cutest girly lavender sweater set. That trendy little Christy Jacobs downtown is ridiculously chatty about unimportant local news but she sure knows her stuff when it comes to picking out skinny girl clothes. Clara applied her make-up exactly like Charlene had showed her. Using a little sponge and everything. She knew to not even consider wearing a scarf. God bless her. She looked perfect. All she needed was to fall madly in love with Jake Smith today. Oh, and of course, Jake Smith needed to fall madly in love with her too. That process would begin in less than ten minutes.

  “Clara, you look marvelous! Now look into my eyes. You, my friend, are a confident and beautiful woman! Walk out this door and knock him dead. He’ll never even know what hit him. Really. It’ll be like a line drive that just bowls him over or a like a bat that hits him over the head…”

  She smiled with such confidence, “I get it, Carlie. I get it. Thanks. For everything. I’m going to run to the bathroom. Just let me know when he gets here.”

  Jake knocked on the door six minutes before one. Doug shook his hand and asked about his daddy. I loved watching Doug answer the door because it was a reminder that he lived here, with me. It was still unbelievable. A good-lookin’ man was walking through the house in his sock feet because this was his home, the home he shared with me, his wife. I wanted Clara to experience the same joy.

  I walked into the dining room. “Hey! Jake, nice to see you again. Can I get you some iced tea? Clara will be out in a minute.”

  “No, I’m fine, Carlie. Thanks.”

  Jake was wearing new blue jeans and a plaid long sleeve shirt. I didn’t love the odd burgundy color of the plaid but I chose to be thankful he wasn’t wearing a short tie. Glass half full, y’know?

  I knocked on the door and told Clara he was here. When she walked out, I decided to watch Jake rather than her. He smiled broadly. Happily. Zing zing zing. This train was movin’ down the track at record speed. Everybody just needed to get out of the crossings. If I could keep Clara away from chunky scarves and Jake away from short ties, I felt confident the wedding would be within six months.

  Chapter 25 CLARA LOUISE: Faith and Mary Kay

  Jake Smith was kind and nice-looking and he had a pleasant way about him. I determined to give him every opportunity to knock me off my feet. And I did. I gave him opportunity. I listened to his stories. I even laughed at the appropriate times. I walked around the lake and asked him questions about eagles and boats and things he knew about. I tried to think about what it would be like to kiss him. Not that I would. I mean, not today. But I did wonder what it would be like if I did. It still seemed horribly scary and nauseating. By the end of the night, well, by the end of the night, I knew that Aunt Charlotte and Carlie were absolutely right. Jake Smith was perfect. Absolutely perfect. On the front porch, I shook his hand quickly, thanked him for the evening, and started to head into the house.

  “Look Clara, what if I came and picked you up in the morning and you could come to our church again? I mean, are you open to that? I hate for you to not be with Doug and Carlie, but if you’re willing, I’d sure love for you to come out to Troy. I’ll even take you to lunch, if you’re game.”

  “Sure. Thanks.”

  “It’s no problem. Really. I’ll be here by 9:00. That should give us plenty of time.”

  “I’ll be ready.”

  When I walked in, the door made a familiar squeaking sound. Carlie was waiting at the kitchen table pretending to read a magazine. But I knew the truth. She was like a lioness waiting for the right antelope to walk by so she could spring to life from behind that Woman’s Day.

  When she saw Jake’s truck pulling out of the driveway, the coffee kicked in and she pounced, “Spill it, sister. What did he order? What did you order? What did he say? Did he seem nervous? Were you nervous? Did he ask questions? Did you ask questions? Well, out with it. Out with it, Clara.”

  “Okay. No, he didn’t seem nervous. I’m sure I did. He asked a lot of questions about my job and my family. I asked him about work and family too. And why do you care what we ordered?”

  “Are you kidding? Good night, Clara. Do you never read blogs or magazines? You can tell a lot about a relationship based on what people order.”

  “You’re not serious.”

  “Dead serious.”

  “For example, tell me he didn’t order a baked potato.”

  “No. Why?”

  “Ordering a baked potato indicates a total lack of interest. And if he put sour cream on the potato? Oh, sour cream is a death march, friend. A death march.”

  “We both ordered the burger and fries. I didn’t eat my fries. He ate every one of his and mine too. So, what do you see in that, Madame Carlie?”

  “I see a big farm boy with good metabolism.”

  I managed a smile. “Look, if you’re asking if I’m happy, I am. He’s a good guy and he’s coming to pick me up for church in the morning.”

  “Well, Glory Hallelujah and AMEN! Ol’ Clara Louise Johnson’s got a boyfriend.”

  “You’re jumping the gun. I have a friend who happens to be a boy. A man, actually.”

  Chapter 26 CARLIE: Whomp Biscuits and Straight Teeth

  “Doug, wake up! It’s 8 o’clock and you’ve got to be ready when Jake gets here!”

  “Why? Honey, I’m not going with her.”

  “I know. But you need to be available in case he wants to ask you questions, get advice, or something.”

  “Carlie, we’re guys. He’s not gonna talk to me about Clara this morning. I’m not gonna tell him his hair looks good. And he’s not gonna ask me where I got my shoes either. He’s coming to pick her up for church. We don’t leave till 10:00. Come back to bed, Honey.”

  “I can’t. I’m too nervous. Plus, I want to make something good for Clara before she leaves. She needs to eat. I’m gonna start the bacon…and t
he eggs…and biscuits to provide ample carb loading.”

  Doug started laughing. “Has anyone ever told you you’re beautiful when you talk about bacon?”

  I reached down for a kiss, “You’re the first.”

  Clara was less nervous than the night before. She looked relaxed. Relaxed and confident. Black dress pants and a multi-colored smock that made her look like a college student. Her hair was in an up do that normally I would have discouraged. But not today. Strands of wispy red hair framed her face. Romantic perfection.

  “Carlie, you can’t make a big deal about this. You can’t.”

  “Who’s making a big deal? I’m making bacon, Sister.”

  Jake pulled in the driveway at 9:02. I know. I have an odd fascination with time. And if you want to get on my bad side, just be late. Two minutes was fine. But ten would have had me pacing the floor eating excessive pork meat.

  I opened the kitchen door. “Good morning, Jake. Come on in. Clara just finished her breakfast. Can I get you something? We’ve got bacon and whomp biscuits.”

  “Pardon me?”

  “Whomp biscuits. You know, the kind that come in a tube and you whomp ‘em on the counter.”

  He smiled and I noticed his teeth were really straight. Truthfully, Jake needed slightly crooked teeth so he didn’t seem so over-the-top. But I can’t convince his parents not to spring for the braces now. Sadly, the deed is already done.

  “No, I’m good, Carlie. Thanks.”

  “Well, I’ll run get Clara.”

  I knocked on the guest room door and then walked in and whispered, “Clara, I’ve got big news, good news.”

  “Yes?”

  I whispered loudly, “He went tie shopping. I’m serious. He’s wearing a white shirt and the tie goes all the way to his pants and it’s all shiny and silver and modern-looking too.”

  “My word. You are a mess, Carlie Jameson.”

  Clara walked out of the guest room with incredible confidence. She and Jake looked beautiful together. A modern tie. A stylish smock. An up do and a shiny silver Camry. This day was nearing perfection.

  “Okay, you two. Stand in front of the fireplace and let me get a picture. I know. It’s embarrassing. And both of you want to throttle me right now. But that’s okay. I have good self-esteem and I’ll recover quite nicely.”

  They both laughed, stood by the fireplace, and smiled. But just before I got the camera focused, Jake put his arm around her shoulder. She turned bright red at the exact moment I pushed the button. Jake Smith had put his first “move” on Clara Johnson. And I was there to snap the picture. It shall now be preserved for their great grandkids. Thank you, God, for small photogenic favors.

  Doug was making a light snoring sound when I entered the bedroom. “Oh Honey, good news! Jake and Clara are getting married!”

  He rubbed his eyes and looked startled, “What? Getting married?”

  “Well, not today. But yeah, eventually. I can just feel it inside. I can.”

  He rolled over and laughed. He was the sexiest man in the world when he laughed. “I love you, Carlie Jameson. With or without the early morning bacon, you’re the best thing that ever happened to me.”

  We made homemade pizza after church and I paced the floor.

  Doug was clearly bothered by my nervous pacing. “Honey, you need to relax. It’ll still be another hour or more till she gets back. Come take a nap with me.”

  Doug has the best ideas. A girl just can’t turn down that kind of offer. I woke several hours later to the sound of glasses in the sink. It would be just like Clara to wash dishes before the eight-hour drive home. And it was just like me to have left them in the sink in the first place. I ran into the kitchen. “Oh Clara, why didn’t you wake me? I know you need to get on the road.”

  “It’s fine. I just got back a few minutes ago. Besides, I wanted to wash these dishes before I left. I could never thank you enough, Carlie. I’m serious. It’s been a good weekend.”

  “That makes me so happy. SO, how was church?”

  “It was good. Everyone was happy to see me. Mrs. Peterson asked if I was sweet on Jake. I said I didn’t know yet. We went to lunch with some folks from church and everyone was nice to me, really nice.”

  “You went to lunch with folks from church?” She must have seen my countenance fall.

  “Yeah, what’s so odd about that?”

  “Well, I guess I just expected you and Jake to have some alone time, some time to get to know each other better.”

  “This family asked us to go and we just went along. It’s no big deal.”

  Hmm. I didn’t like that bit of info and I wasn’t sure why. But I chose not to focus on it.

  I had plenty of other things to think about.

  Monday morning:

  The movie people called and told me Ashley was being cast in the lead role but they were still looking for a more well-known actress to co-star with her. I called Ashley and she was ten feet off the ground. I felt blessed. God had thrown us together in a diner and now she would be starring in a movie. It’s true, Aunt Charlotte. God watches over fools and insecure women.

  Shannon called in a state of despair. They’d had another failed fertility procedure. I didn’t get why God was answering our prayers with a “No.” This seemed like a no-brainer. They’re a fantastic couple. They need a fantastic baby. But if there’s one thing I learned a long time ago, it’s that I don’t run the universe. And as hard as it is for me to accept, that’s a good thing.

  I know this. If someone asked me five years ago what I would be doing today, I wouldn’t have had a clue. When I was working at the Dollar General in Commerce, Georgia, I would have never predicted that I’d marry a good-lookin’ Tennessee banker and move to a farm, write a best-selling book, or talk to people in Hollywood about a movie. But the one thing I did know? Even five years ago, I knew that Clara Louise Johnson was an undiscovered treasure. By God’s grace, maybe someone had finally turned over the rock.

  Chapter 27 CLARA LOUISE: Blowing the Dust Away

  While I was wandering aimlessly through the cereal aisle, the cell phone rang. I hoped it was Jake. But I had a feeling it was Carlie. When I saw the number, I started to push “Ignore” but I didn’t.

  “Hello.”

  “Clara, this is Dusty McConnell.”

  “Uh, Dusty?”

  “Look, I’m out of jail on bond awaiting the trial and I need to visit with you. I can’t leave the state so I can’t come see you. Not yet. But Clara, I don’t know. I just need you to know that I didn’t do it. I didn’t.”

  “Well, that’s good, Dusty. I’m sure it’ll all come out in the trial then and you’ll be fine. I hope you have a good lawyer.”

  “I think I do. We still can’t figure out who put the drugs in there. And now, well, now it’s gonna affect my business. I’ve owned the shop for three years and I’ve got a good reputation. I’m afraid people are gonna be afraid to do business with me now.”

  “Maybe not. Look, I’m sure it’ll be fine once the trial is over. Really.”

  “Thanks, Clara. I don’t guess you’re comin’ to Tennessee anytime soon, are ya?”

  “No. I was just at Doug and Carlie’s yesterday. So, no. I won’t be comin’ for a while.”

  “Not another one of Carlie’s matchmaking projects, was it?”

  “Uh, not really.”

  “I’d be glad to come to Georgia. I wanted to come. I did. It’s just that now, right now, I can’t. But I hope this, this whole mix-up will be straightened out soon. And I hope this hasn’t messed up the way you think of me. I’ve done a lot of bad things in my life. I don’t deny it. But not this time. That wasn’t my cocaine. It wasn’t.”

  “I don’t even know you, Dusty. We met on the side of the road. You don’t need to be worried about my view of your character. You need to be worried about the jury’s view. I’m sure it’ll all turn out fine and I’ll be happy for you. I will.”

  He sighed as though he were disappointed. B
ut I didn’t know if he was disappointed with me or disappointed with himself. He paused and then said, “Yeah, well, thanks, Clara. Sorry to have bothered you. Have a good evening. Bye.”

  “Bye.”

  I got home with the groceries and was happy to see an e-mail from Jake.

  Clara,

  It was a fun weekend. I’m glad you could come to Tennessee. I thought about coming to Georgia in two weeks. I could take Friday off, and be there when you get out of school. I’d leave Saturday afternoon to be back in time for Sunday. Well, are you game?

  Jake

  I wrote back immediately.

  Jake,

  Your Georgia tour guide awaits your arrival. I’ll be here and ready for the adventure.

  Clara

  Chapter 28 CARLIE: Trials and Bad Pork Chops

  I can’t decide if tonight’s dinner was a complete failure or just a minor setback ‘cause, truthfully, some things in life aren’t pass/fail. I think the dinner was a C+. Pork chops are just ridiculously hard to get right. I mean, if you overcook ‘em they’re hard and dry. But if you undercook ‘em, everybody goes to the hospital. That’s really a lot of pressure. I always feel it’s best to err on the side of physical safety, right? But tonight’s pork chops were so hard I thought they might inflict dental damage. So we finally gave up and made ramen noodles. Doug didn’t seem traumatized in the least. He said my skills in the kitchen were not what kept him a happy husband. So we laughed and ate Ramen noodles and ice cream. It was a carb-loaded supper, just in case we needed to run five miles or something. Thankfully, we didn’t.

  We curled up on the couch and watched Andy Griffith. You know, that one where Barney gets taken in by the old lady selling the car. It was just at the good part when we heard a knock at the back door. I stayed on the couch but I could hear Doug’s voice. “Dusty, hey man, good to see you. Come on in. Have a seat.”

  I stood up and rearranged the blanket. Dusty smiled as he walked toward me. He had removed his NAPA ball cap and when he did, he ran his fingers through his hair a bit to keep the brown curls out of his eyes. He was wearing jeans and a gray t-shirt. Clara was right. He was handsome. Not in a movie star way. And not even in a “bad boy” way either. No. He was handsome in a humble, understated kind of way. He wasn’t as tall as Jake. He was a little thinner. But something about him was attractive. I was dying to know about the eye patch and the scar. But of course, I wouldn’t ask. I guess that was one of the blows life had dealt him…or maybe the result of one of the blows he had dealt back.