Anchored

by Rachael Wade

  As I slip into the town car and out of the scorching, Bahamian sun, I realize I gave it all up the moment I surrendered myself to Tanner Christensen. I sealed my fate. Maybe deep down, there was a part of me that wanted this outcome, that wanted Jade to win, so I didn’t have to, because winning meant more pressure, and I already had enough.

  Which only leads me to wonder…does that make me triumphant, or does it make me a coward?

  “Hey,” Lana’s voice calls to me. I pull my gaze from the backseat passenger window to look at her. “You’re miles away.”

  “I know. Sorry.”

  She places her hand over my knuckles. “It’s all going to be okay, An. I promise you. I don’t know how yet, or what things are going to look like moving forward, but I do know they are all going to work out, one way or another.”

  “You have no idea how much I really need to hear that right now.”

  “Oh, but I do. I’ve been there before. I’m there with you, now. You’re not alone in this, okay?”

  I rest my head on her shoulder and a tear leaks onto my cheek. A deep breath helps to hold in the ache, to push back the others that I know are looming. When we arrive at the airport, I’m shocked to see Margaret waiting to greet us.

  “How does she know about our flight out?” Lana whispers, gaping at the poised, tailored woman standing at the curb.

  “I’m sure Jade filled her in.”

  “Of course she did,” Lana mumbles. The driver helps us out and Margaret slowly approaches us as our luggage is retrieved from the trunk. Lana tips the driver and he takes off, leaving us there with Tanner’s mother. There’s an awkward silence that slips between us at first, but Margaret dispels it.

  “I feel I owe you something, Miss Banks,” she says, looking at me intently. “I’m not sure what. Congratulations, perhaps?”

  “An apology, perhaps?” Lana quips, with a snap of her hip.

  “Lana.” I place my hand on her shoulder and gesture for her to step behind me. I stand before Margaret and wait.

  “Yes, I suppose I owe you one of those, as well.”

  “I’m not sure I understand why you would congratulate me.”

  “For standing up to Jade Simmons, of course. For holding your ground and taking responsibility for your involvement with my son. I heard what happened. It takes courage to hand over your job like that, especially when you were forced to do so under such impossible circumstances.”

  “So, what you’re saying is, congrats on losing my job.”

  “No.” She points a finger in the air and closes her eyes. She presses her lips together and breathes deeply. When her gaze returns, she tips her chin up, looking more resolute. “I’m not saying this right. I’m not very good at this sort of thing, you see.”

  “What sort of thing?” I think she’s very good at making others feel small. A pro, in fact.

  “At admitting I’m wrong. Admitting that sometimes I do not know best—for others, like my son. You see, ever since Tanner took over this ship, I was certain he’d do a better job than his father. I was certain his path would look exactly as I’d hoped it to, as I’d pictured it for him. I don’t deny that there is a huge part of me that wants him to remain in control of Trident Voyager because it’s my own, personal desire. I still believe that Tanner running this ship with Jade’s help and financial backing is the very best idea in terms of business sense.”

  Lana clears her throat behind me. “You call this an apology?”

  “Lana,” I hiss. “Let the woman speak.”

  Margaret’s eyes flit toward Lana. “I apologize for judging you. For lumping you in with all the other women Tanner has run around with since taking over the ship. You are nothing like them; I see that now. Most of all,” she steps forward and levels her gaze with mine, “I am sorry for standing behind Jade instead of you, when it is so very clear how crazy my son is for you.” She looks down for a moment. “I had a little conversation with Bernhard, you see.”

  “Bernhard?”

  “Yes. It seems you made quite an impression on him. And with Bernhard, first impressions are everything. Once he sizes you up, he has his mind made up, and that’s that. Stubborn, stubborn man, he is.” She rolls her eyes and sighs. “In short, I simply cannot allow you to get on that plane. You cannot leave, Miss Banks. I will hire you and your friend here to write for my establishments. I will see to it you’re taken care of. This decision certainly won’t save the Trident Voyager. It will likely ruin my son’s name, and Jade might walk away with everything, but I refuse to watch him live a life of misery, and I know that’s his fate if he is coerced into being with that woman.”

  “That woman?” My brows rise.

  “Oh come now, Miss Banks.” Margaret’s chin tilts down and she eyes me skeptically. “You don’t honestly believe you’re the only one with a little distaste for Jade Simmons.”

  I avert my gaze. “Hhmm. You certainly had me fooled.”

  “All business, darling. That’s all it ever is in this world. We step on others to get where we want to be. It’s cruel and unfair and downright ridiculous, but sadly, it is the way of the world.”

  “It doesn’t have to be,” Lana says. Margaret looks at her this time—really looks at her—and nods, taking a direct step around me to extend her hand. “Miss Crawley, I don’t believe we’ve had a proper introduction.”

  Lana snorts, but accepts her handshake. I bite my lip to restrain a giggle. Nope, there was nothing proper about her initial introduction to Margaret Christensen. “So you’re going to be my new employer, are you?”

  “Well, that depends, of course.”

  “On?”

  “Many things. For one, if you’re going to be working for me, my dear, you must cover up some.” Margret’s eyes drop snootily to Lana’s cleavage.

  “Look, lady, these are one hundred percent genuine, and I’m not on the clock. What you see is what you get—”

  “Oh, Lana,” I sing-song, pulling at her elbow. “How about we accept Ms. Christensen’s kind offer and discuss the dress code later, eh?”

  “Fine,” Lana pouts, sneering at Margaret. “But we should discuss catering and food stipend. I think it’s very reasonable to request a meal allowance, provided as a courtesy. And none of that fast-food nonsense. You’re a classy woman, Ms. Christensen.” Lana taps Margaret’s shoulder. Margaret’s eyes follow the movement and I have to bite back another laugh. “I’m sure you appreciate fine gourmet, yes?”

  “What she means is thank you, we accept the offer,” I say, smiling sweetly.

  “Well,” Margaret’s nose tips up, “isn’t that a relief?”

  “There’s one little problem, though.”

  “And that is?”

  My shoulder rolls. “Tanner’s made up his mind. He’s going to marry Jade. He’s going to remain owner of the ship. I supported him in the decision. I appreciate the gesture, Margaret, although I know it’s entirely aimed at your son, not me, but I’m afraid it’s too late.”

  “I find it hard to believe it’s too late where you are concerned, Miss Banks. If you’d only go to Tanner and tell him what I’ve said, how you really feel, I don’t doubt he’ll change his mind.”

  “But that’s just it—I don’t want him to, don’t you understand? I cannot ask him to leave his father’s legacy behind. I wouldn’t be able to sleep at night, to know that I’m the reason he walked away.”

  “Tanner is a grown man, Miss Banks. He’s responsible for his own choices.”

  “Of course he is. But I don’t want to stand in the way of his happiness.”

  Lana huffs and begins tapping her foot. She nods to Margaret and waves in my direction. “Do you see what I’ve been putting up with?”

  “Lana,” I begin, but she cuts me off.

  “Nope, sorry, An. I’m with Mama Bear, here. It’s one thing for me to support you in throwing your career out the window and walking away from Tanner the way you did. I understand your intentions and why you chose what you chose, an
d I’ll still get on that plane with you if it’s really what you want, if you think it’s what’s best for you. But this is a game changer. Margaret’s on your side, now. She’s offering you a fresh start. She’s telling you what I’ve been trying to tell you all along. Tanner wants you! Not Jade. And he might not see it just yet, but he wants you more than he wants to run his damn ship. You just have to step up and declare you want him too, instead of pushing him away.”

  “Miss Crawley and I might not agree on style,” Margaret slides a judgmental glare in Lana’s direction, “but we do agree on this. Please don’t go, Anya. Go see my son. He needs you. More than you know.” Her gaze is still guarded, her demeanor still cold, but there’s sincerity there, hidden beneath it all. Only then, when I see it, do I open my mouth to speak.

  “I suppose…I suppose it couldn’t hurt to speak to him.”

  Lana groans in frustration. “Yes! That’s the Anya I know and love! Yes, yes, yes.”

  “You really think he’ll want to see me? After…everything?”

  “Anya,” Margaret’s tone is firm, “I believe you’ll be saving him from a grave mistake. One he’ll have to live with for the rest of his life. How I wish it weren’t true. But his heart is more important than his business. I cannot watch it perish.”

  Lana and Margaret look to me expectantly, with an urgency that moves me to action. I nod silently, then turn spastic. I spin around in the other direction, as if I can chase the town car that just dropped us off.

  “Anya!” Lana calls after me. “You crazy woman, come back!”

  I clutch my chest, half smiling, half gasping, trying to catch my breath. “I need to tell him,” I mumble. “Oh my God, I need to tell him.”

  “Of course, you do,” Margaret says, waving me back in their direction.

  “Oh, finally. You’ve snapped out of it. Now, you see the light!” Lana blurts, rushing over to guide me toward them. “You really had me worried there. Please don’t ever do that again. Or it will get ugly, Anya Banks. Like, really ugly. Like zombie guts and brains, ugly. Like, I will be forced to tie you down and torture you with a Walking Dead marathon.”

  Margaret’s lips curl in disgust while her forehead wrinkles in confusion.

  “What was I thinking?”

  “I don’t freaking know, but I deserve a friendship medal of honor for agreeing to support that shit!”

  “Lana,” I sputter, stalling in my tracks. She and Margaret try to encourage me forward, to the other end of the sidewalk, where another town car awaits. “What were you thinking, letting me make such a stupid decision?”

  “Hey, I’m not required to agree with your stupid decisions, I’m only required to support them, even when they’re idiotic.”

  “If I jumped off a bridge, would you follow me?” I give her my very best WTF face.

  “Probably. I’m not sure what that says about me.” Her lip juts out and she seems to think about it for a moment, then tosses the thought aside. “Now, come on. Let’s get your ass back to the ship.”

  Margaret hurries us to the town car, not waiting for the driver to jump out and open our doors. “Yes,” she agrees with Lana, “let’s get you there as quickly as possible, before you have time to let the fear talk you out of it again.” We hurry to duck inside the shiny black car, but a glaring car horn sounds from the distance, bringing us still. We stop and glance back in the direction of the obnoxious noise, lowering our sunglasses to get a better glimpse of the horizon.

  “What in the hell?” Lana wrinkles her nose, lifting a hand to further block the sun.

  Margaret hurries around us and a bright, pleased smile takes over her face, smoothing out the rigid wrinkles, bringing warmth to the chill in her bones. “That’s my boy,” she says under her breath. I follow her smile and Lana’s bewildered expression, trying to make sense of what’s headed in our direction. The headlights flash on, then off, and the nose of the white car jerks erratically as it speeds toward us. I recognize the corvette, and as it grows closer, the owner’s deep, blue eyes.

  My Mr. Blue Eyes. My Tritan. Tanner, God of my heart, and God of the sea.

  The car screeches to a stop in front of us, the front tires jumping the sidewalk’s curb. We all jump back and gasp, while the town car’s driver looks on in shock. “Anya,” Tanner shouts as he jumps out of the car. “Thank God.”

  I start for him, more than ready to run into his arms. But I want to hear him, first. Want to know what he has to say. I don’t want to make the wrong decision. Not now. I need for this to be his decision, because he wants it, not because I want it for us. He needs to want us just as much as I want us.

  “Tanner? Is everything okay?” I pause before him.

  “No. God, no. Everything is so fucking far from okay.” He licks his lips and tugs at his tie, eyes darting over to his mother and Lana. “You couldn’t just stay out of this, could you, Mother? You had to run her off and run her over in the damn process. You and Jade! She’s not responsible for Lana being on the damn Crown Jewel. She wanted to put a stop to it. That was my doing—I encouraged the idea. And if you must know, she never came to my cabin, never touched me after her agreement with Jade, I brought her there! I did this, not Anya. And yet you humiliate her like this and destroy her career? Who gave you that goddamn right? Tell me.”

  “Tanner,” I try to stop him, but he’s on a roll. He veers around me and marches in front of his mother, peering down at her with angry, arctic eyes.

  “I wanted this damn ship. I wanted it for you, for Dad, and for me. You know how much it’s meant to me. I’ve done everything you asked since he died, and then some! I admit I screwed up. Time and time again. I brought shame to his name, but damn it, I built it back up and became a man I’ve been proud to be. I’ve run this ship with control, competency, and skill. This woman came into my life and turned it upside down. I didn’t plan it, I didn’t see it coming, but I wouldn’t take it back. Not for a second.”

  “Um, Tanner?” Lana tries to help, but she’s shot down, too.

  Margaret shushes her, keeping her eyes on her son. “Let him finish.”

  “I am like him—like my father. I’m a fighter.” Tanner takes one more step forward, casting a reverent but firm glare over his mother. “But I had it wrong. Since I met Anya, I’ve been fighting for the wrong thing.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with wanting it all, Son.” Margaret lifts her hand to touch Tanner’s face. “Sometimes, life doesn’t work that way, though. Sometimes we can’t have it all. Sometimes we have to let go of one dream to chase another. Some dreams run their course, while others last. The key is to know which ones to hold onto.”

  “You’re not going to change my mind. I choose Anya, not Jade. I choose Anya, not the Trident Voyager. I give it all up. Go on, have it. Take it. It’s yours. I don’t care about the merger. I don’t care what it does to my name. All I want is right here.” He pivots and gestures to me, and when his eyes land on mine, I fall into their depths.

  “That’s so foolish,” his mother whispers, watching us. Her eyes are misty with unshed tears. “It breaks my heart. And yet, I completely understand, Son.”

  Tanner reaches for me, his gaze holding mine as if I’ll disappear from sight if he looks away, but his attention quickly snaps back to his mother. “You what?”

  She glides forward and squeezes his forearm. “I understand. I want you to be happy, and I know Anya makes you happy. I understand,” she says again, firmer this time. “And I’m sorry. For hurting you the way I have. Please forgive me.”

  Tanner blinks, and his lips part. “You understand I’m walking away from the ship. From everything Dad’s left me. I’m handing it over to Jade.”

  “Yes. I understand.”

  “How is that possible?”

  Margaret shakes her head slightly and lifts her hands. “What can I say? Love surprises you at every turn. The love a mother has for her son is especially baffling. All these years, I still haven’t figured it out. All I know is I desi
re for you what you desire for yourself. I want the very best for you, Son, and I believe you when you say that the best is standing right beside you, right now.”

  Tanner looks skeptically at Lana, and Lana puckers her lips and raises her hands in the air.

  “You mean it.”

  “Oh, for heaven’s sake.” Margaret walks around Tanner and stands before me. “Anya Banks, will you kindly get in that car with my son and drive away? Take him back to the ship, to a chapel, to Aruba—I don’t care where, just go, will you? Leave Jade and the ship to me. Miss Crawley,” she glances at Lana, “come with me. We have much to discuss, starting with your new Editor in Chief position for my new travel publication.”

  Tanner gapes at his mother. “What new travel publication?”

  “The one I’ve decided to launch just this morning. The same one that I’ll use as leverage to partner with Jade Simmons myself, in exchange for allowing me to take your place as partner in the merger, of course. If there’s anything she cares about, it’s money, as you well know. She’d be a fool to turn down the offer, and we both know Jade loathes the thought of being one of those.” Margaret winks and starts for the town car, urging Lana to join her.

  Lana jumps forward to give me an excited hug, reaching up to hug Tanner, next. “Ohhhh, I could just squeeze those cheeks!” she says, with her best granny expression. “Take care of my best girl.” She gives him one last pat on the shoulder and joins his mother, ducking into the town car. They drive away, leaving us at the airport, stunned and speechless.

  “What the hell just happened?” Tanner finally asks, dragging his gaze away from the space where the car was parked just moments ago.

  “Do you really need a full recap, Mr. Christensen?”

  “No, I just…”

  I sigh.

  “Does this mean I get to kiss you now?”

  “Yes.”

  “And does it mean you’ll let me, without being fresh?”