Alone Beneath The Heaven

by Bradshaw, Rita

  Sarah wasn’t sure if Lady Harris expected her to comment, but she said nothing, deciding to let her face - as Lady Harris said - say it all. This turn-around in attitude was both a surprise and suspect, and she couldn’t pretend otherwise.

  ‘You are wondering if this is a ploy to dispose of Peggy quickly and quietly, is that not so?’

  ‘Yes, but I have no wish to appear offensive.’

  ‘No, I am aware of that, Sarah. You were merely using the mind God gave you and that does not displease me - just the reverse, in fact. I also appreciate honesty where I find it; it is a rare commodity these days. Now, I think it would be a good idea to have a word with Peggy, so if you wouldn’t mind . . . ?’

  Peggy was quite literally shaking in her shoes when Sarah ushered her into the morning room a few minutes later. Sarah could feel the girl trembling through the arm she had round the little maid’s shoulders, and when Lady Harris said, ‘Peggy, my dear, you have nothing to fear from me. Has Miss Brown told you?’ she knew their employer had noticed the small girl’s quivering too.

  ‘Yes, ma’am.’ Peggy tried to smile but it was beyond her.

  ‘Sit down, please, both of you.’ Lady Harris gestured to one of the low upholstered couches, and when they were seated she moved from the fireplace where she had been standing at their entrance, and sat opposite them.

  A silence ensued between them for a moment or two, then Lady Harris said, her tone so quiet that Sarah found she was leaning forward slightly in order to hear, ‘I am more sorry than I can say that you were subjected to such an experience at my son’s hands, Peggy, and also that I was less than discerning of the true facts. Lady - Lady Margaret has acquainted me with certain matters that should have been brought to my attention years ago—’ She stopped abruptly before continuing, ‘But I am using that as an excuse, and there isn’t one. Nevertheless, you do realize that you were very foolish to visit Sir Geoffrey’s rooms at such an hour?’

  ‘Yes, ma’am.’ Peggy’s head was drooping down, and now Lady Harris said, ‘Look at me, child,’ before continuing. ‘I am not blaming you for last night’s occurrence, I wish to make that clear. The blame rests with Sir Geoffrey and only Sir Geoffrey.’ She took a deep breath before saying, ‘Miss Brown informs me you do not wish to take the matter further. You are sure about this?’

  Peggy glanced from Lady Harris to Sarah, and then back again to her employer before she said, ‘I’m sure, ma’am. It’s . . . it’s me dad you see. I’ll just go home, ma’am, if that’s all right with you.’

  Lady Harris stared hard at both of them for a full minute without saying a word, during which time Sarah steeled herself to remain seemingly relaxed and perfectly still, and then her expression changed as though she had come to some kind of decision. Her words seemed to bear this out when she said, ‘I feel I would like to be frank with you, Peggy, and then if you still feel you wish to leave, I will see to it that you are placed in a good position. I assume you do not particularly wish to return home?’

  ‘Not if it can be avoided, ma’am, but - but I don’t feel right about staying here now, after . . . after what’s happened.’

  ‘Yes, I can understand that, of course.’ Lady Harris rose now, walking across to the mantelpiece again, and standing with her back to the room as she stared down into the dead ashes in the ornate grate. ‘Sir Geoffrey has left these premises and I do not expect that he will be staying here again. Neither will he reside at Fenwick in the foreseeable future. If you wish to remain in my employ, Peggy’ - she turned and faced them - ‘I would very much like to retain you, but if you feel this is not possible in the circumstances then we can arrange something different. Whichever decision you make, I would tell you now that I intend to open a bank account for you with a deposit of five hundred pounds to be used in any way you favour.’

  Peggy’s mouth fell open in a gape. If Lady Harris had suddenly sprouted wings and flown out of the window she couldn’t have been more amazed and bewildered.

  ‘Do you understand what I am saying to you, child?’

  ‘I - I don’t - I can’t . . .’

  ‘There is no need to make a decision one way or the other until you have had time to reflect. For now I would suggest you go to the kitchen and have something to eat, then go to your room and rest.’ Lady Harris’s tone had softened, and when Peggy burst into tears she moved forward to stand in front of them, patting Peggy’s shoulder as she said, ‘Come, come, my dear. Try and look at this as a hurdle to be dealt with and overcome. Miss Brown will take you to the kitchen. And Sarah?’ The piercing gaze fastened on Sarah’s face. ‘Perhaps you would be good enough to return here when you have seen to Peggy?’

  ‘Of course, Lady Harris.’ Sarah rose, drawing Peggy up with her. The events of the last few minutes had surprised her not a little and alarmed her considerably. This smacked of Peggy being bought off, and she didn’t like the idea of Sir Geoffrey getting away with such brutality, and yet . . . Lady Harris had made the offer to Peggy after the little maid had said she intended to go quietly without any fuss. Oh, she didn’t know what to think.

  Hilda made no pretence of tact when they entered the kitchen. ‘Well?’ She eyed the weeping Peggy before transferring her gaze to Sarah and saying, ‘What’s happened?’

  ‘Peggy will explain, I’ve got to get back. Could you give her a cup of tea, Hilda? I think she needs one.’

  ‘I think we all need one.’ Hilda led the still weeping Peggy to the kitchen table, pushing her down in one of the hard-backed seats as she said, ‘How about a nice bacon sandwich then, Peggy? I’ve still got an ounce or two from our rations and old Perce is sending a meat parcel from the farm this week. How we’d manage without that I don’t know, one ounce per person goes nowhere in this house. You can’t tell me it’s not encouraging the black market, now then . . .’

  Sarah left them to it and returned to the morning room to find Lady Harris still standing exactly where they had left her. The old lady spoke without preamble. ‘I came face to face with myself last night, Sarah, and I didn’t like what I saw. Lady Margaret came to see me after the incident, and by the time she left my eyes had been opened, both with regard to my son, and myself. I had a . . . a difficult night. It is not pleasant to find out the truth about oneself in such circumstances.’

  It wasn’t at all what Sarah had expected, and when Lady Harris waved for her to be seated in one of the chairs in front of the empty grate, then sat opposite her, Sarah said, ‘I’m sorry, Lady Harris. It must have been very distressing for both you and Lady Margaret as well as Peggy.’

  Lady Harris didn’t comment on that as she continued, ‘I asked Sir Geoffrey for an explanation this morning and I’m afraid the conversation escalated into something . . . unpleasant. I don’t like being lied to, I have never tolerated it, and neither am I a foolish woman - however present circumstances might appear. Sir Geoffrey’s attitude this morning was inexcusable—’ For the first time Lady Harris’s ironclad composure slipped a little, but she recovered herself almost instantly, saying, ‘And suffice to say Sir Geoffrey will be staying at his club indefinitely.’

  ‘And Lady Margaret?’ Sarah asked quietly.

  ‘Lady Margaret and my grandchildren will continue to treat both Fenwick and this house as their own.’

  She’d chosen her daughter-in-law over her son? Sarah could hardly believe her ears. And not just that, Lady Harris had virtually barred Sir Geoffrey from the family homes by the sound of it. He’d be furious, absolutely furious. She couldn’t see him taking this without a fight.

  ‘Now, a rather delicate matter . . .’ Lady Harris adjusted the snow-white lace collar at the neck of her black alpaca dress and cleared her throat, then said, ‘There may be another complication arising from last night’s’ - a pause - ‘attack. You understand me?’

  ‘I think so.’

  ‘Of course I hope it won’t be necessary but if it is, I want the child to understand that she must consult my physician at once. These things are be
st dealt with immediately.’

  These things. A baby could be dismissed as ‘these things’, and it was clear Lady Harris meant she would expect Peggy to get rid of the baby, Sarah thought grimly. Not that she thought there was much likelihood of a baby; Sir Geoffrey had been interrupted too soon. But if Lady Harris thought her money could buy a life - or a death in this case - she was wrong.

  Sarah stared at her employer for a moment, then said, ‘If Peggy found she was expecting a child, the decision of whether to continue with the pregnancy would be hers and hers alone, Lady Harris, but I will mention what you’ve said.’

  ‘Thank you.’

  It was stiff, but Sarah didn’t care. These people! In spite of everything Lady Harris had said that morning, at bottom she would still be more upset at the thought of a bastard grandchild than at the attack on Peggy. She wanted this thing hushed up. Well, Sarah could understand that in a way, it was human nature she supposed, but she couldn’t agree with it. The man was an animal and he should get his just deserts. How many other young girls had he seduced or attacked and raped? He thought he was some feudal lord, able to take what he wanted without a thought for anyone else, secure and protected by his wealth and power.

  Sarah stood up now, her voice cool as she said, ‘Is there anything else, Lady Harris?’

  ‘Not for the moment, Sarah, thank you. Perhaps you would be so good as to keep me informed on what Peggy decides to do when she has had time to think about her future?’

  Sarah inclined her head, but said nothing more before leaving the room.

  She was still reflecting on the conversation with Lady Harris later that morning as her fingers deftly arranged a bowl of white-flowered madonna lilies in the drawing room, and she nearly jumped out of her skin when a tentative hand touched her shoulder at the same time as Lady Margaret’s voice said, ‘Oh, I’m sorry, Miss Brown. Did I startle you?’

  ‘It doesn’t matter.’ Sarah smiled. ‘I usually do this before breakfast, but—’ She stopped abruptly. She had been about to say, ‘with the house in turmoil this morning they got left,’ before she realized it wouldn’t be tactful. ‘But I’m all behind this morning,’ she finished instead.

  ‘Yes.’ Margaret Harris looked at the younger woman, her clear blue eyes moving over the face which she considered quite classically beautiful. She had always been particularly receptive to beauty wherever she found it; one of her first memories was of hanging precariously over the windowsill in the nursery one evening, and calling for her nanny to come and see the fine sunset, and that appreciation had seemed to grow as she became aware of her own plainness.

  But this young housekeeper had more than mere beauty; she had a strong spirit to match, a spirit which hadn’t allowed itself to be subjugated by either circumstances or personalities last night. ‘May I speak with you, Miss Brown?’ Lady Margaret asked softly.

  It was a rhetorical question, and Sarah did not answer it, merely following the tall thin figure of Sir Geoffrey’s wife as she swept across the room to seat herself on a small chaise longue upholstered in blue velvet, and indicated for Sarah to take the chair opposite.

  Sarah sat down and waited for Lady Margaret to speak, her face quiet and composed but her mind racing. She had felt, from the first moment that the older woman had laid eyes on her, that Sir Geoffrey’s wife didn’t like her, and her reserve had been chilling. So now, when Lady Margaret leant forward and said quickly, even urgently, ‘I want to thank you for last night,’ she really didn’t know how to react, her mouth falling open on a little O of surprise as she drew back slightly.

  ‘That sounds strange, heartless, doesn’t it, in view of what that little maid suffered? But I cannot pretend, Miss Brown. Not any more. I . . . I don’t often speak to people like this. In fact I can’t remember doing so before.’

  It was a plea for understanding and Sarah rose to it, in spite of feeling far out of her depth. ‘Last night must have been a shock for you too, Lady Margaret.’

  ‘It came more in the nature of a release, to be truthful.’ Sarah stared at her, a straight look. ‘You mean because it all came out into the open?’ she asked baldly.

  ‘That is exactly what I mean. Oh,’ Lady Margaret shook her head, ‘I wouldn’t have wished such an experience on a child like Peggy, please believe that, but - but other such occurrences have happened in the past to even younger girls.’

  ‘Then why . . . ?’

  ‘Knowing it and proving it are two quite different things, I’m afraid. My husband has a way of taking care of matters - bribery, threats, I’m sure he has used them all, but to date I have been unable to prove so. Last night, due to your courage, he was exposed for what he is, and I am glad.’

  Sarah shifted uncomfortably before she said, ‘Lady Margaret, I don’t think you should be talking to me like this.’

  ‘I am sure I shouldn’t. It isn’t done - that’s what you mean, isn’t it? Miss Brown, last night I went to see my mother-in-law, and for the first time in nine years of marriage to her son, I actually talked to her, but it took a catastrophe to make it happen.’

  Sarah detected a slightly animated note in the hitherto even voice, and after a moment she inclined her head slowly. ‘Yes, I can understand why you are feeling relieved this morning,’ she said quietly.

  ‘Last night I came to the end of my tether, and that is what I tried to explain to Lady Harris. I have always found the list of dos and don’ts that go hand-in-hand with my class extremely tiresome, and when I married Sir Geoffrey they became even more so. The stiff upper lip is a crippling British tradition, Sarah.’

  Lady Margaret now straightened, her hands resting either side of her thighs on the velvet seat as she leant slightly forward and said, ‘I am very grateful that you stood up to my husband in the way you did. I know it can’t have been easy, and I won’t forget it. I - I would like to talk with you again sometime, if I may? I find town life rather dull on the whole.’ Then, her voice changing, she said, ‘Well, this really won’t do. I have promised to take William and Constance for a turn round the little park opposite before lunch. Although their tutor set some lessons for them before we left Fenwick, they do get rather bored at times. They miss their ponies and their friends, no doubt.’

  She rose now, nodding and smiling as Sarah followed suit. ‘I’ll leave you to the flowers, Sarah.’

  Two Sarahs in as many minutes! In spite of the emotion of the night and the revelations of the morning, Sarah found it was Lady Margaret’s softened attitude towards her that occupied her mind as she finished arranging the bowl of flowers, and then made her way to the kitchen to help Hilda with the lunch, Peggy having been sent back to bed. Pausing in the passageway before opening the kitchen door, she realized that her previous assumption that Lady Margaret disliked her had been unfounded. It wasn’t that Lady Margaret had held any animosity towards her, just that she had been - Sarah searched for the right words and found them - locked into herself, into her situation. Poor soul.

  She surprised herself on the last thought, but then inclined her head slowly. Lady Margaret was a poor soul, and just as much a victim of Sir Geoffrey as Peggy. She must have had a terrible time of it before she broke out last night, and that was the right phrase sure enough. She had the appearance this morning of a person who had been released, set free. It just showed that you never really knew what was going on in other people’s lives.

  The thought brought Rebecca to the forefront of her mind again and she frowned. For months now she hadn’t been able to rid herself of the notion that her friend was hiding something, but every time she had asked her, Rebecca had denied anything was wrong. Something was troubling her, though, and it had to do with her pig of a husband. Her description of Willie Dalton brought Sarah up short. Therein lay the problem: Rebecca knew what she thought of Willie, she’d always known it, as did the man himself, and Rebecca was always careful to say nothing that would inflame her low opinion. Not that it could get any lower.

  Sarah thought back to th
e first time she had met Rebecca’s husband, when he and Rebecca had been courting for a few weeks. She had heard plenty about him from her friend before then, Rebecca having met Willie at a barn dance the local vicar had put on, the proceeds of which had gone towards the war effort. Sarah had been ill on the night of the dance, but Rebecca had come back to Hatfield glowing, and full of the young docker who had monopolized her all evening. She had fully expected to like Rebecca’s choice of beau when she had met him - Rebecca had been able to talk of little else for weeks - but she hadn’t, and he hadn’t liked her either. Oh, he’d been charming enough, obsequious even, but he had known she could see right through him, Sarah thought flatly.