The Sphere of Time

by TIME, S. O.

  Kou slouches forward as the downpour returns, the clouds above showing no signs of stopping. They release an endless sea of water, as if the heavens themselves are mourning Hitori’s death, crying Kou’s infinite stream of tears.

  I stand at the end of the crater when Kou looks up at me, finally sensing me. His eyes are a dark scarlet, like old blood. Neither of us exchange words, but a deep compulsion starts me walking toward him. The closer I get, the stronger a force I feel that pushes us toward each other. I’m sure he feels the same force as he extends his hand to me. I reach for it. Without warning our bodies merge and so do our memories. His memories, my past, come back to me. My fears, hopes. My love for Hitori. In the same instant, his mind learns of my memories, his future. He learns of the powers of Death. Though our memories are shared, we don’t share the same mind. I have become part of his body, yet I don’t feel like I have control over what he does. But that lack of control doesn’t spare me his—our—pain. Our anguish. Our regret. Nothing that I’ve experienced until this moment even comes close. I want to disappear. Kou wants to disappear. We want to go wherever Hitori has gone, though we both know where that is. We look at Hitori’s lifeless body and sense nothing. Her living energy is completely gone.

  Naomi appears before us. The water droplets from the rain pause in midair as she stops time.

  “Let’s take it slow,” Naomi says.

  She lifts Hitori’s soul from her body. Seeing Hitori in that translucent, blue form sends a shockwave of denial and anger through us. An all too familiar hopelessness washes over us. We fight the urge to scream, to beg, to bargain as Naomi waits for Hitori to awaken. When Hitori gains consciousness, she looks at us before noticing her new form.

  “What’s happened to me?” Hitori asks. “Kou, what’s going on?”

  We open our mouth but cannot bear to answer. Hitori looks around at the stationary droplets of water in the air before looking down at her own body in our arms.

  “Is this a dream?”

  “I’m afraid not,” Naomi answers. “There’s no easy way to say this—”

  “Are you the reason I’m like this?” Hitori asks. “Who are you?”

  “I’m… a friend of Eiji’s. I’m here to take you to what comes next.”

  “What comes next?” Hitori swallows as she takes Naomi’s words in. “Wait, if I’m—is Eiji here, too?”

  Naomi shakes her head. Hitori’s breathing becomes heavier and she glances back at us.

  “I—I tried to save him… there was blood everywhere… I’m sorry.” Hitori moves her hands to her eyes as she weeps. Every tear she sheds slices deeper wounds within us as we watch. I want to explain everything to her, that I’m here, that I’ve always been here, but I have no control. Even if I could speak, I don’t know how to explain what’s happening. Not when I’m still trying to grasp it myself. We stay quiet, unsure of what to say or do. Hitori turns to see the tendrils sticking out of the ground where they’d hit her. She flinches involuntarily. “I…I didn’t make it either, did I?”

  “No. You didn’t. You saved Kou instead,” Naomi answers.

  Hitori wipes her cheeks and turns back to us with an attempt at a smile that comes out so broken it breaks us along with it.

  “I told you I’d be the one to save you,” she says as she brings her hands together to hide her shaking.

  “I’m...I’m—sorry. I’m so sorry,” is all we can manage to say. The words come out of our throat like razor blades, each syllable an admittance of our ultimate failure. Hitori shakes her head.

  “This isn’t your fault. You already sacrificed yourself for us. You’re a real dummy for using the serum like that. Things could have gone much worse.”

  Kou moves us forward to hold Hitori’s hand with ours, but it passes right through her. The worst has already happened.

  I’ll never touch her again.

  We’re both silent for a moment.

  “It just looks like it’s not time for us to be together yet,” Hitori finally says with a shaky voice. “We’ll find a way back to each other. We always do.”

  For the first time, we realize we don’t believe her.

  “You’re right. I know we will,” we answer. It sounds hollow.

  “You can’t stay out here much longer.” Naomi says quietly. “If the darkness reaches you before you pass on—” she hesitates. “Just—I can only hold it back for so long.”

  I know she is giving us what time she can, but I hate her anyway. She opens a Tear, and Hitori’s eyes widen.

  “This will take you where you need to go.”

  Hitori opens her mouth to ask Naomi a question, but stops herself. She must know that her time is fading fast. She must choose her words sparingly.

  “Hey, look at me.” Hitori speaks to us. We look up.

  “I need you to be strong for the both of us. There is still work to do around here. I’ll be waiting for you on the other side.” She leans over to kiss our cheek. I can’t feel it.

  “I love you.”

  I don’t want this. I don’t want to say goodbye. I don’t want to lose her forever. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with this loneliness, with this massive, gaping hole within me. Not when I’ve finally found the reason for my returns to the past.

  She walks up to the Tear and pain shoots through our body. We tense up and grit our teeth. Is there really nothing we can do about this? Is there really no way to save her?

  “I will come looking for you!” we blurt out, “I will find my way back to you!” I know such a thing is impossible, and yet—this time it doesn’t quite feel like a lie.

  She stops for a moment and smiles.

  “I know,” she says before walking through the Tear. Naomi then closes it behind her.

  Hitori is gone.

  We glance at Naomi as she takes a few steps back to give us space. Kou looks at our hands and extends one, creating a Tear of his own. It leads to a field with flowers of all shapes and sizes, the colors a stunning contrast to the darkness that looms over us. We watch as a violet butterfly passes by the Tear, fluttering from one flower to the next. I know he meant to open a Tear leading to Hitori, but not even I know how we’d ever be able to go there. I’ve never thought to travel into other people’s souls. Kou tries again, but the same meadow appears, peaceful and utterly empty of any human. Again and again he opens Tears, bearing no fruit. We drop to our knees and punch the ground in anger, causing the rubble-strewn soil to split and fracture.

  “Kou…” Naomi speaks, but we pay her no mind.

  Kou opens another Tear leading back to the field. He reaches to put his hand through, but the Tear closes before he’s able to. He doesn’t seem to have much control over the powers of Death. I don’t know how to help.

  With Hitori’s body in our arms, we stand up and float out of the crater. Flying doesn’t seem to drain my energy now—it’s effortless. We notice a nearby pedestal, still covered in the dust of whatever statue had previously stood upon it. It is scored with a few stray burns, but it’s otherwise intact. We lay Hitori on its surface, gently arranging her hair and placing her hands over her heart. We then open another Tear into that field, this time successfully reaching in and taking out a flower. Our mouth is dry and our head buzzes with white noise as we place the flower in her folded hands.

  “Kou,” Naomi says softly.

  Her tone is strained, as if she’s carrying something beyond her strength.

  “I can’t hold time still for much longer. I need a break to gather what little energy I have left.”

  We don’t look up from Hitori. “Fine. Release time.”

  She hesitates. “Isao and his generals are still—”

  Something between a sob and laugh wrenches free from our throat.

  “It doesn’t matter anymore, Naomi. Can’t you see? How could it possibly matter?”

  She doesn’t reply and I hear her back further away. It’s then that time continues to flow again and the rain returns. We become dimly
aware of a commotion somewhere behind us as the few remaining combatants find us meters away from where we were. One of the generals from before rushes in to attack us, but we stand still and catch the general’s punch with one hand, holding his fist in an iron grip. The other general launches toward us, but as soon as he gets within striking distance, we open a Tear into space and send him into the sun. We close the Tear and turn our attention back to the other general, who is gaping at the space where the Tear appeared. We close our hand tighter around his and begin to crush it as he yells out in pain. He drops to one knee and the red aura that enveloped him disappears. We pull on his arm and throw him at the remains of the building behind us, which crumbles and falls through the ground as the sludge that was around it burns through the ground. We look at our hands and dimly note that we are no longer wreathed in pure scarlet. Instead, the aura of energy around us is black, shot through with a few veins of deep red.

  We head toward Isao, who is on his knees, blankly staring at the ground. As we get closer he turns to look up at us.

  “Why does this keep happening to me?” he holds his hands out in front of him and watches them as they shake uncontrollably.

  “I only wanted to protect her,” he says. “But she kept choosing you…if she’d only listened.” Isao shakes his head and rocks back and forth. “If everyone just listened to me!” He glares at us and his expression darkens further. “If she’d only stayed away from you!”

  He reaches beside him, into the pocket of a fallen soldier’s uniform and pulls out a syringe with his serum. He injects himself with it, unleashing a destructive outburst of energy, similar to when Kou injected us. We’re standing close enough to Isao that we should be taking damage, but as the ground breaks around us, as the buildings rock, and as energy hits us directly, we remain unscathed.

  Unwavered.

  We now have all the power we could ever need. But it doesn’t matter. Because we’ve already lost. There’s no point anymore. This thought circulates through our mind and it angers us more with each repetition as our energy continues to climb.

  Isao needs to pay.

  “This is your fault!” he yells, his eyes wild and bloodshot. “First Kaori and now Hitori.”

  Hearing him say her name is enraging, a hideous blasphemy that sends a fresh jolt of rage through us.

  “I will make you pay! I will make you suffer!” He launches forward to attack.

  His speed is incredible, but this time we move forward so quickly that we’re able to catch him by the throat with one hand, overcoming whatever force he had generated and pushing him back into the nearest building. We slam him down on the ground as he wheezes and coughs. He gets back up and tries to punch us, but we dodge and retort with a strike to his stomach. As he bends forward from the blow, we grab the back of his head and bring it down with vicious force onto our upraised knee. He stumbles back, his nose mangled and bloody, and launches a wave of tendrils at us through the earth. We avoid it easily by levitating into the air, but he manages to leap over his own attack to grab our ankle. He yanks down and delivers a punch to our abdomen, but the blow lands as if against steel. His knuckles crack and his energy wavers at his shock. With one hand we grab his arm and lift him up before launching our own energy beam that rips through his injured shoulder. We let him go and he crashes down to the ground. For the first time I’m able to see Isao lose. If only it still mattered.

  Every blow seems hollow. Without purpose. I’ve lost my true reason to fight.

  Isao moves forward to attack but we grab his arm and force him forward so he loses his balance. As he steps back to catch himself we make a Tear to our right that opens right beside his face. We punch into it with our free hand, connecting solidly with his jaw as another Tear opens beside his face. He takes our punch with full force and he flies off to our left. Before he’s able to get back on his feet we open a Tear that leads us to his left. He tries to punch us but we step back into another Tear that leads us behind him. Frustrated, Isao yells and launches another tendril attack that spikes up all around him. Before it can hit us, we jump through another Tear that takes us a few meters ahead of him.

  Isao snarls and jumps forward, out of the way of the tendrils. That’s when we open numerous Tears around him and jump through them while punching him as we move. Before he can pinpoint our location to attack us, we move through another Tear and come out through another to attack again. We do this until finally we fly through a Tear that opens up underneath Isao, sending him into the air as we kick him into the sky. We fly up to him and grab him by his leg and send him crashing back down to the ground. We descend to him and lift him off the ground as we grab him by the neck again. By this point Isao’s energy is dribbling away, all the additional power from the serum fading to nothing. We let him go and he falls to his knees, wheezing and coughing up blood. He holds onto his shoulder and wallows in his defeat.

  “This isn’t fair.” He spits out blood. “I’ve lost and suffered more than you can imagine.”

  “And now you’ve taken from me the only happiness I’ve ever known,” we reply.

  He drops his head and leans forward. I feel Naomi appear beside me and I turn to her.

  “I’m sorry this had to happen to you,” she says. “I’ve tried on other timelines to prevent all of this, but nothing ever works. As if things were always meant to happen this way.”

  We say nothing.

  “But I’ve never seen this before,” she says, “I’ve never seen you transform like this.”

  “What happens next?” we ask.

  “The souls of the Lost come through and attack. Something about all of this death pulls them in. That’s when I usually rewind the timeline. But…things are different now. Before, most people fall prey to the Lost and the sludge. Only a tiny fraction of the population is able to escape in ships that lead to deep space. But because you showed Hana how to make a portal this time, this Branch of Humanity might have more hope now. Hundreds of thousands have already gone through. They’ll be able to start over.”

  Despite her almost hopeful pronouncement, when I look up to her, I see only pain and anguish. As if she, too, had just witnessed a loved one die.

  She sighs. “Take what little remains of my power and guide me, too. I’m so…tired. I’m done playing Death. I was never meant to be here.”

  The rain continues to fall and tornadoes form, making their way to the ground as Tears take over the city.

  “Here it comes,” she says. Our holo makes a light chime. We look down to see a message from Hana.

  Most of the people have been evacuated. I’m sending the last batch of helos to your location.

  They made it. We could never have imagined such a victory would feel so hollow. We raise our left hand and gather energy to launch one last energy beam at Isao. We will end this.

  “Would it be too much if I made one last request?” Naomi asks.

  “I’m not sparing his life.”

  “No, that’s not it. You have every right to be angry. I was only hoping that you could guide us both. Together.”

  “You and Isao?” we ask.

  “Yes. It’s the one and only thing I ask of you. Please.”

  “Tears aren’t meant to guide more than one person at a time.”

  “I know.” She doesn’t offer anything else, but we shrug, beyond caring.

  We turn to face Isao again, a vicious swirl of red energy building in our raised palm.

  Don’t do it.

  We flinch at the voice. It’s in our head. It’s not Kou’s voice, or anyone’s voice that I’ve ever heard.

  Death does not kill, another voice says.

  We guide, not murder, a third rings out.

  Everything around us starts to spin as we become weaker.

  Maybe…Maybe we shouldn’t do it, I think.

  We need to make him pay, Kou thinks back.

  I don’t want to kill.

  I need to avenge Hitori.

  It won’t bring her bac
k.

  We owe it to her to end this.

  Back and forth I argue with Kou in my head over what we need to do. As we argue more Tears open up in the sky. Larger tornadoes form, swirling with unsettling dark shadows and flickering with sickly red lightning. Earthquakes begin to shake the ground, sending cracks through the rubble-strewn streets. Static fills every sensation and I fall to my knees, my body shaking as I feel like I’m being torn apart. I feel Kou’s hatred and pain reverberate in my head. As his demand for vengeance grows, my resolve to prevent us from killing grows as well. Sensing my determination, Kou’s anger grows and becomes more distinct, seperate from my own feelings.

  You would betray her by letting him live!

  She wanted us to beat him, not kill him!

  We were to beat him at all costs! She would still be alive if not for him!

  A horrific ripping sensation rushes through my body, as if my skin is being peeled away. I think I scream. The feeling is both agonizing and alien, like I am being burned away and healed simultaneously, trapped in a horrific regeneration.

  And then, suddenly, it is gone. I’m on the ground on my hands and knees, barely able to breath. I look up and I see Kou, completely shrouded in black energy. Looking down at myself I notice I’m enveloped in a white energy. But my body is now identical to Kou’s. I’m dressed in the same battle-torn clothes, carrying the same cuts and burns. And I know, instinctively, we wear the same exact face. We stare at each other, twins in body and soul but utterly separate in mind.