Burning Attraction

by Ashley Beale

  The majority of the night after that we were naked while dancing, running around, and making out with one another in front of guys. We played leap frog outside naked, but Carson, Pierce and Joe got us inside before we could make any more fools of ourselves. Carson is the one that gave me a shirt, that I took, but Aubrey refused to wear anything and was kicking at people who tried to make her. Joe was sober, so once I started getting sick, he helped bring the three of us back here. Pierce says that Carson was furious that Aubrey and I left with him, but he promised nothing would happen and we were safer at his house.

  He thinks that is why Carson is blowing up my phone, to make sure that I'm okay. And he swears up and down that nothing happened between the two of us, and the reason he was naked was because I told him I would sleep outside if he didn't get naked. He says he just stripped down to keep me inside, and fell asleep before he got the opportunity to re-dress.

  I'm mortified but I cannot help to laugh at some of the things he explains from the night before. Aubrey is laughing alongside me, making me feel a little bit better that I wasn't alone in the night of insanity. Apparently she is the one who gave me the hickey too, which of course makes me feel so much better about myself.

  When the story telling is done I grab my phone and look at the missed calls, seven of them from Carson, twenty three from Avery. There are five text messages from Avery, and four voice mails that I haven't listened to yet. I read through the text messages first.

  Avery: im sorry bout 2nite, can we talk bout this? love u.....

  Avery: i didnt mean to call u that, i was just jealous. plz call me bby..... love u

  Avery: ok i get it. ill c u 2mrrow????? love u angel. happy bday :-(

  Avery: wtf am i hearing bout u being naked last night??!?!?! u need to fkin call me NOW

  Avery: fuck u

  The last one makes me tear up. Great. I screwed up big time, but he doesn't have the right to be pissed off at me, when he was the one who screwed up last night. He was the one who was out somewhere, with some chick, not answering his phone, and called me whore when the only thing I did was dance with some friends. I can understand him being jealous, and I can forgive that, but the rest, it's all unexplained, and I still have no idea why that Leah girl answered his phone.

  The text message was twenty minutes ago and he has called twice since sending it, so I decide to send him a message in return instead of calling him back.

  Me: u know what Avery? No! fuck u!!!!! u dont have the right to say shit to me like that.

  My phone buzzes seconds later, causing my heart to pound out of my chest.

  Avery: we'll talk about this later....

  I'm not sure about that. I don't want to. I'm so pissed right now I'm shaking. I blink back the tears forming before they can fall and take a deep breath before calling Carson. He answers on the first ring.

  "Cassie?"

  "Hey Carson, sorry, I just woke up a few minutes ago. What's up?"

  I can hear his sigh of relief. "Thank God. You okay? Anything happen? Do you need me to come get you? Do you need your clothes? Do-"

  "Whoa, whoa," I cut him off, "calm down buddy. I'm fine, nothing happened at all, we all just slept. I don't remember much about last night but Pierce filled me in on a lot of it a few minutes ago. If you want to come pick us up, that'd be awesome, but only to get my car. I need to get home and showered."

  "Okay, Joe remembers where he lives, I'll be there in a few. I'll glad you're okay."

  "Thank you Carson," I say then hang up my phone.

  I tell Aubrey and Pierce that Carson is on his way, and Pierce says that his truck is there, so he needs a ride over too. How did I not know that Pierce drove a truck? I thought we knew each other, but I guess I never rode in a vehicle with him, so I could see how it never got brought up. He looks like a pickup truck kind of man and it makes between my legs throb.

  Carson shows up a few minutes later and drives us back to the frat house. Aubrey walks straight to my car after she thanks him, still taking the hangover bad. Pierce says thanks to Carson, then gives me a hug before he runs to his big red truck. Then I follow Carson inside, so I can get my stuff.

  When I enter the frat house I feel horrible, it is trashed. "Holy shit, do you want me to help clean this?"

  He shakes his head. "Nah, that’s what the freshman are for. The pledges clean this shit up, I had to do it last year." I follow him up the stairs to his room, where my stuff apparently is.

  When we enter the room, I'm a little stunned to see a picture of the two of us on his computer desk. I walk over and pick up the frame, looking at the picture that wasn't here the last time I was. Carson comes and walks behind me. "I love that picture. That was when we went to the aquarium."

  "Yeah, I remember," I say placing the picture down. I turn towards Carson and our lips are almost on one another. His eyes flicker from mine, to my mouth, back to my eyes. They're glowing blue with desire and I can feel myself tingle deep down. He starts to lean toward me but I clear my throat, causing him to jump back. I bite down on my lip and stare at him, confused. "You have a girlfriend."

  He shakes his head, "no I don't. We split last week." He turns away from me, looking down at the floor and walks to his bed, where the two pairs of heels and dresses are placed.

  "Oh my God, I'm so sorry Carson, what happened?"

  He turns to face me again, looking extremely pale. "I'm still in love with you. Every time I see you at the gym, I fall more and more. I couldn't do it any longer. I know how you felt now."

  My jaw drops. Holy. Fucking. Shit. What do I say? Carson is amazing but all this time spent together just shows me how much I don't feel that way towards him, and here he is falling more in love with me. Enough that he leaves his girlfriend for me. No wonder he went all out on this birthday party for me, and why he was so scared of anything happening to me. Oh my God, how could I not see this?

  "Carson, I-" I pause, trying to figure out what to say. "I don't know-"

  "Don't Cassie, it's okay. I don't know why I told you that. It was out of line."

  "No, it wasn't out of line. I just don't know how to reply. I love you but I'm not, I, I just don't love you like that. I thought we were really good friends and I've been enjoying my time at the gym with you."

  "I know," he says, "I'm sorry."

  "Don't be sorry Carson." I walk up to him and give him a big hug, his arms instantly wrap around me, pulling me tight. I think I hear him sniffle, but maybe I'm wrong.

  He whispers in my ear, "I don't want this to scare you off. I can't lose you."

  I whisper back, "don't worry, you never will."

  "Good." I pull away and look at him, he looks like he is in so much pain and my heart hurts for him. "I'll see you next week beautiful. Have a good day." He kisses my cheek, his lips lingering a little longer than they should, but I let him.

  "Bye Carson. I'll see you then. Thank you again, for everything." I pick up the clothes and shoes and walk out of the room.

  Aubrey and I head back to the apartment without saying any words, still feeling groggy from last night. Only making one stop at McDonald's for my hangover cure. It gives me time to process what the hell just happened with Carson. Everything that happened last night. How did everything that was going so freaking perfect explode like this in less than twenty-four hours? What do I do about all this? How do I begin to fix things?

  When we get back to our place, Aubrey heads straight to her bedroom, probably to go back to sleep. I go directly in the bathroom so I can get a shower finally. After I'm washed up, I just sit in the bottom of the shower, letting the stream of water wash away my tears as I process everything. I'm so angry at Avery right now, but at the same time, it's his arms I want wrapped around me. I want his encouraging words, his love, his kisses. I want him. I need him.

  I get out of the shower, brush my hair, teeth and throw on some pajamas, finally feeling like myself again. As I lay in my bed, I grab my cellphone to see nothing from no one. I listen
to the voicemails from earlier. Two of them were from Avery last night, sounding drunk, begging me to call him. The next from Carson this morning, panic lacing his voice, asking if everything is okay and to please call him. Then the last one was from Avery this morning, sounding like he's been crying, begging me to call him. My heart pounds in my chest, it aches so badly, for both Avery and myself. For everything.

  Deciding to push my pride back, I call Avery's phone. He doesn't answer, so I hang up and re-dial it. Still no answer. I decide maybe it's best I just leave him a voice mail. "Hey Avery, it's me. We need to talk. I'm sorry about last night and this morning. But you have a lot to explain too, so please call me back... I miss you." I hang up and tears start flowing down my face again. I snuggle up inside my comforter and in no time sleep takes over.

  Chapter 17: Consequences

  Aubrey and I haven't heard anything from Mason or Avery, so we decide to say screw it. Around seven that night, we cuddle up on the couch together and have a movie marathon. The first movie is a horror film that I've been dying to watch. Aubrey is terrified, because she doesn't typically watch scary movies, but I promise her that we can watch a comedy directly following.

  It's half way through the movie, and she's been jumpy but doing well. Now it's at a scene where the girl is totally clueless of the guy in a face mask coming up behind her. Aubrey grips into my arm with her fingernails as the masked man raises his axe behind the girl. I'm biting down on my lips, forcing myself to pay attention. The music on the movie starts doing that, da-dum, da-dum, da-dum. As soon as the axe gets the girl in the back of the head there is a loud knock on our apartment door.

  Aubrey jumps from the couch, screaming bloody murder as she runs down the hall and slams the bathroom door. I can even hear the lock click. Thanks Aubrey, if this is some kind of murderer, I'm glad you'll at least be safe in the locked bathroom. I'm a little shaky when there is another knock on the door. I slowly climb off the couch and make my way to the door. "Who is it?" I yell out in slight terror.

  "Me, open up," the husky voice slurs out from the other side. He may sound drunk, but I'd know that seductive voice from anywhere.

  I open the door with force and glare at Avery, who has a drunk Mason standing behind him. My eyebrows raise as I take in the two of them. "What the hell are you doing here?" I cross my arms and lean against the door jam, waiting for an answer.

  Avery leans in and squints his eyes, looking at my neck where the hickey is. He huffs out a laugh, "nothing."

  "It's from Aubrey," I say before he can go calling me a whore again. His eyes open as wide as they can, and I hear Mason chuckle.

  Avery grins a little bit. "That's kind of hot, except I'm mad at you."

  "Good, because I'm pissed at you."

  I hear Aubrey yell from down the hall, "do I need to call the cops?"

  I can't help but laugh at her. "No Aubrey, I'm already slaughtered to death, thanks for the help though."

  The bathroom door creaks open and her head pops out, seeing me looking over my shoulder at her. "Who’s here?"

  "Our asshole boyfriends," then I turn to look at the two of them, "or is it ex-boyfriends? I'm confused."

  Avery cringes at my words. "I deserve that. Can we come in?"

  I walk into the apartment and the guys follow behind me. Closing the door I point to the kitchen table. Both Mason and Avery sit down and I join them. I hear another door open, so I turn back around to see Aubrey come out of her bedroom, wearing different pants. I'm confused but I don't say anything. She walks over to where we are and smacks Mason's arm before sitting down. “Screw you both," she pouts.

  I laugh at her, "get a little scared?"

  She whips her head to look at me, her eyes bulging. "A little? I just fuckin' pissed myself!"

  Mason, Avery and I all burst into laughter at the same time, and now I know why she changed her pants. I have to grab ahold of my stomach, because I cannot contain my laughter. "What?" I finally spat out.

  "It's not that funny," she mumbles under her breath.

  Once I can catch my breath from all the laughter I look to Avery who is just smiling at me, but in a sloppy way. He isn't just drunk, he is wasted. "How did you get here?" I ask him, scared to think he was driving drunk on his motorcycle.

  "Walked."

  "From?"

  He sighs, "the bar."

  I shake my head. "It's early for a bar. And it's a Sunday. Is this another lie?"

  He laughs dryly, "really, you can call me a liar? I didn't lie about shit. I haven't even had a chance to talk to you about things, you just go and assume shit, then cause petty drama while you grind on the one guy I want to ring around the neck."

  "First off," I say sternly, pointing my finger at him, "that wasn't petty drama. You could have fucking answered a phone or called me! It was my birthday and I call your phone and some bitch named Leah answered the phone, saying you were in the shower, and was quite amused with me when I told her my name, saying she heard of me or some crap like that. Then you still don't show up for how long? And when you do, you're an ass. And you call me a whore before you leave the party!" I'm starting to shake from being extremely angry all over again.

  "Can we talk about this shit in your room? I'm sure that these two would like to discuss shit of their own," he says slurring. I don't answer, instead I get up from the table and walk towards my bedroom, slamming the door behind me. Avery opens it up a second later, chuckling softly. "You knew I was coming in here, you didn't have to slam the door."

  "I was hoping it'd hit your face," I snap.

  He shakes his head in amusement. "You're pretty hot when you get this pissed off."

  "Don't Avery. Sit your ass down and tell me why you didn't answer and who that girl was. And I hope to hell you tell me the truth, because if there is even a sliver of doubt in your story, I'm done. I won't be lied to!"

  He rubs the top of his head and sighs, "I won’t lie." He sits on the bed and lays his head against the back board. I sit on the other end of the bed, not daring myself to be near him when we're both alone in my bedroom. "Mouse called me in, said it was important and wouldn't take long. I didn't think it would, so I didn't bother calling you. Mason was already with me, so he tagged along. The meeting was at his house, and when I got there, Leah, Mouse's sister answered the door. She said there was a big meeting and it was best to leave cellphones back, so I threw mine down on the table.

  "The meeting was in an office that Mouse has, and there were six other guys in there with him. They asked me to join a semi-professional fighting team that could eventually get me into the UFC's. We discussed money, schedules, and all the boring details. It took a lot longer than what I expected, and I was so involved in conversation with the guys, I hadn't been paying attention to the time. When the meeting was done, they had me do a few practice rounds in Mouse's gym on one of their guys.

  "I finished that up, but was sweaty and didn't want to show up to your party smelling like a gym sock. I jumped in his shower while Mason talked with Mouse about setting up a few more fights. When I got out of the shower, Leah said you called and seemed worried. I hadn't known she was a bitch until Mason said something to me about it later. I was so pumped by the offer, that I just wanted to hurry to you and tell you all the news in person, but when I got there I saw you grinding on Pierce, and I fuckin' lost it. I shouldn't have flipped out the way I did, and I shouldn't have called you a whore, but I could only see red."

  I stare at him, processing everything he said. It all seemed genuine, his expression looks like he is being honest. I know I'm going to be skeptical for a while, but maybe we can get pass everything. "So you never cheated on me?"

  "No, never baby. I could never cheat on you," he says, and I do believe him. He is full of sincerity.

  "Okay," I say looking down at my hands, "I'm sorry that I danced with Pierce like that. I was just so angry. I called and sent you messages, and Aubrey tried Mason. Then Leah answered and acted like a mistress. I was already
drunk but threw back a handful of shots. Pierce helped me out a little bit and kept an eye on me, and we were just dancing, being friends. It wasn't like that at all, it never will be."

  He nods, processing what I'm saying. "I heard a lot of shit this morning," he states, looking hurt.

  I bite down on my lip, hoping he will explain what he heard but he just stares into my eyes. A few minutes of silence pass before I finally say anything. "I blacked out, I didn't remember anything until Pierce told me this morning." As soon as the words left my mouth I realized that was a huge mistake.

  "Pierce?" he asks, raising his voice. "Did you sleep with him?"

  I shake my head no. "I didn't sleep with him, but I want to be honest with you, I did sleep in his house." I don't dare to tell him I woke up in his bed, while Pierce was butt naked and I was only in a tee-shirt, no underwear underneath. He would probably die from heart failure. I hate not being totally honest, but nothing did happen between the two of us, we only slept, and I don't need Avery having any more doubt or worry right now.

  "Ouch," he mumbles, still starring me in the eyes. His green eyes have darkened and I know he is angry, but he isn't yelling, which is a good sign. I think. "So what happened last night? That you remember at least. Or was told I should say."

  I tell him everything that Pierce told me, leaving out a few minor details. He looks heartbroken with every sentence that leaves my mouth, and I feel guilt taking over my insides. "I'm sorry," I breathe out once I'm done telling him everything I can.

  "Me too," he says. There is a long awkward pause before he utter the words that break my heart. "I think we need a break."