“You haven’t spoken with her yet, have you?” Rebecca asked.
Dusty shifted in her seat. “Well, no. I’ve tried, but every time—” A smirk from Rebecca cut her off. “No, I haven’t.”
“And yet, even as difficult as it is for Addison and Maggie to move through what they’re doing, even though it’s a huge risk for Addison…” Rebecca paused and raised a questioning eyebrow.
“Yeah, yeah, I get it. She’s at least doing something, and I’m not. And that’s really why I want to be mad at her.”
“Wow,” Eve said as though she’d just been shown the way to Eden.
“And you’re in the same boat, little missy.” Rebecca pointed at Eve with a teasing grin. “What is all your feet dragging about with Sammi?”
Dusty snorted.
“I—” Eve blushed. “I just don’t—”
“Mm-hm,” Rebecca said, leaning back in her chair. “You just don’t. Both of you girls need to get busy with your own paths, and believe me, you’ll have a lot less time to be judging someone else who’s actually walking hers.” Her tone was loving but still drove home her point.
After sharing tuna sandwiches and fruit salad with Rebecca and Jessica and helping with the clean up of the brushes, rollers, and drop cloths, Dusty and Eve said their good-byes and stepped out into the afternoon. The rain had stopped, and the sun peeked out from behind the remaining gray clouds.
Dusty felt as cleansed as the crisp air and took a deep breath. She could always count on Rebecca to clear things up. She made up her mind to call Addison as soon as she got home.
Chapter Seventeen
Eve stepped into Sammi’s arms and returned a long, languid kiss.
“I’ve been thinking about that all week,” Sammi whispered when their lips parted. “The first kisses are great, but after that, you always know exactly what you’re missing.”
Eve smiled. She slipped her fingers into Sammi’s thick, hair. “Can I show you again what you’ve been missing?” She was no longer uncertain about this part.
“By all means.” She pulled Eve close.
They stood in Sammi’s living room, exploring each other’s lips and tongues, their mouths making love the way Eve hoped—no, knew—they would do with their bodies someday. In Sammi’s embrace, she lost all sense of time.
Sammi drew away. “I need to stop or we’re going to have scorched zucchini soup for dinner.”
Eve looked into Sammi’s gray eyes and saw her own desire reflected back to her, but she accepted the graceful segue into the evening ahead. “Is there anything I can do to help?” she asked.
“You can chop vegetables.” She took Eve by the hand and led her into the kitchen. “I meant to have the salad already made, but Nick was late picking up Melissa, so I’m running behind.”
“I’d be happy to.” It would give her something to focus on besides everything she wanted to do with Sammi but was too afraid. She took in the soft contours of Sammi’s body beneath her charcoal gray cashmere sweater and blue jeans. The heat from their kisses continued to simmer.
Sammi stepped around her and set a bag of ingredients for a green salad on the counter. She pressed her lips to Eve’s neck. “Thanks. The knives are right there.” She pointed to the block in front of Eve.
Before Eve was halfway through a head of romaine lettuce, Sammi set a wooden bowl beside her and returned her attention to the pot on the stove. They worked side-by-side comfortably, and Eve began to relax.
“How was your time with the boys?” Sammi asked, stirring the soup.
“It was fun. We went to Chuck E. Cheese’s for dinner,” Eve said. “They love it there.”
Sammi’s eyebrows shot up. “On a Saturday night? Wow, you get Mom of the Year for that one.” She laughed.
“Yeah, it was a little crazy.” Eve smiled. “But as soon as I got to the house, Daniel turned on the charm, and Enos put on his pleading puppy-dog face. I never had a chance.”
Eve had spent the previous night and all that day with the boys until it was time for her date with Sammi. It always felt so right to be with them for those extended periods, and she no longer worried about whether she would ever live with them again. It was just a matter of figuring out where and working out the logistics with Jeremy.
They’d had a little time to talk that afternoon when he’d returned home and the boys were busy playing video games. Eve could tell that something had shifted. At first, she thought it was between them, but after a while, she realized it was simply within her. She felt at peace—with the direction her life was taking, with the awareness she would never share a home with Jeremy again, and with the ending of their marriage. Discovering and admitting that she’d been feeling guilt had allowed her to release it, to acknowledge to herself she truly wasn’t doing anything wrong. She’d simply learned more about herself and was doing what she needed to do to live honestly. She’d always be so grateful for her conversation with Rebecca the previous afternoon and for everything that’d had to come together in order for it to take place—Aunt Carolyn introducing her to Maggie, meeting Dusty through that, Dusty taking her to Seth’s party…She was beginning to marvel at the way life worked, the way it conspired for everyone’s good. She trusted this next part would go just as naturally if she kept out of her own way.
She’d been leaning against the tiled counter in the kitchen she and Jeremy had remodeled together, watching him work beside her.
“What’s up?” he’d asked. He pushed the bicycle inner tube he’d just inflated into the sink full of water. The blue and gold UCLA T-shirt he wore stretched across his swimmer’s shoulders, reminding her of the strength of his embrace.
“You know, don’t you?” she asked, already certain of the answer. “You’ve known all along.”
There was the slightest hitch in his movement as he ran the tube through his fingers, searching for the leak. “Know what?”
“That we’re…” Eve hesitated. “That you and I are over.”
Jeremy stilled, gazing down into the sink. When the bubbles broke the surface of the water, he smiled.
Eve retrieved a towel from the drawer behind her and handed it to him.
He began to dry the inner tube. He turned to face her. “I hope we aren’t over.” The lenses of his steel-rimmed glasses magnified the brown flecks in his green irises. “I hope we’re just…” He shrugged.
Eve remembered Rebecca’s comments about Maggie and Addison. “Letting our relationship be different?” she asked.
“Yeah.” He nodded. “That’s a good way of putting it.”
Eve sighed. “I just can’t help but wonder why you don’t hate me. I’ve talked to other women in similar situations, and their husbands—”
“If I hate you, I lose my best friend in addition to my wife, and I don’t want to lose you as my best friend.” He brushed a few strands of hair from her forehead. “But mostly, I really want you to be happy. And, yes, I’ve known for a while that I’m not the one who can do that for you.”
“You really are my best friend, too. You know that, don’t you?”
“I do,” Jeremy said quietly. “And because we’re friends no matter what else happens, and because of those two great boys in the other room, we’re going to be fine.”
Eve nodded and squeezed his hand. “I believe that.”
“And now, I’ve lost the leak again, so I have to start over.” He shook the inner tube at her.
Eve laughed. “And I need to run. I—” Eve stopped herself. Could she tell him she had a date? He was her best friend, and she’d wanted to tell him about Sammi, but she thought it too soon—for both of them. She didn’t even know where Sammi’s and her relationship might end up, and Jeremy…Was he ready to know she was already dating someone?
“Daniel told me about Sammi,” he said, as if reading her mind. His hands were back in the water.
“Well, that certainly hasn’t changed,” she said, embarrassed. “You still know everything I’m thinking. When did he tel
l you?”
“A few weeks ago, after you took them to the park with Sammi and Melissa. It’s actually Melissa he couldn’t stop talking about, but I put the rest together.” Jeremy lifted the inner tube from the sink, this time holding his finger over the hole. “I’m not ready to hear a lot about it, but I’m glad you’ve met someone you like.”
That was Jeremy, genuine and to the point.
With an inner smile, Eve brought her thoughts back to the present. She glanced at Sammi. “What did you and Melissa do today?”
“Since I’m working twelve-hour shifts the next three days and she’s with her dad until Thursday, she got to pick how we spent our day.” Sammi’s cheeks turned red. “We played princess dress-up.”
Eve grinned. “I would’ve loved to have seen that.” She knew it was Melissa’s favorite game, one that Sammi consistently tried to dissuade, but Melissa usually won. “Which princess were you?”
“Snow White, of course.” Sammi fluffed her dark brown hair. “Lissa’s very picky. I wanted to be Cinderella this time, but she says I have the wrong coloring.”
Eve laughed and sliced a cucumber onto the lettuce. “I think it’s so funny you ended up with such a little girly-girl.”
“My mother says it’s Karma for me being such a tomboy when she wanted me in all the frilly dresses that she loved.” Sammi added some basil to the soup. “At least it gives the two of them a common bond. You should see my mom all decked out. She makes a great Fairy Godmother.”
“She doesn’t get to be a princess?” Eve asked in surprise.
“Oh, no. Lissa told her she was too old,” Sammi said, imitating Melissa’s serious tone.
“Ouch.” Eve giggled. “That’s so harsh.”
“Yeah, I guess I should consider myself fortunate.” Sammi chuckled. “I have a plan, though.”
“What’s that?” Eve reached for a tomato and cut it in half.
“As soon as she’s a little older, I’m going to introduce her to Xena.” Sammi raised her eyebrows. “That’s the princess I want to be.”
Eve looked at her, intending a humorous response, but her mind went blank as she pictured Sammi in the tight, low-cut bodice, short skirt, and wrist cuffs the warrior princess wore, a sword and shield in hand. Her simmering desire rekindled. “I could see that,” she said softly.
Sammi flashed a sexy smile. “I can see you’d like that.” She stepped forward and held a spoon to Eve’s mouth. “Here. Taste.”
Eve parted her lips and took in the thick, hot soup, her gaze locked on Sammi’s. Flavor exploded on her tongue. “Mmm, that’s good.”
“Maybe I’ll go to next year’s Halloween party as Xena for you.”
Next year? Would they be together next year? Eve swallowed the soup. Its warmth mingled with the heat already stirring in her belly. She didn’t want to have to wait until next year. Ever since she’d begun reading on the subject of lesbian sex, her fantasies had gone berserk. In this very moment, she could see Sammi in the costume, coming toward her, grabbing her, taking her. She had a flash of Sammi pushing her down on the bed, pinning her, and moving over her, but it vanished when it was replaced by the reality of Sammi’s lips on hers, her tongue moving in Eve’s mouth. Eve dropped the knife she’d been using onto the counter and turned fully into Sammi’s arms. She pressed her body against hers and lost herself in the flame of both their need.
Eve moaned and slid her hands over the small of Sammi’s back. The sweater slipped up, and her fingers grazed soft flesh.
Sammi gasped, then deepened their kiss.
Eve couldn’t stop touching her. She slid her hands underneath the cashmere and stroked warm skin.
Sammi thrust her hips and tightened her hold.
Eve felt a hand slip beneath the tail of her cotton blouse. It was as though time stood still as she waited…waited…waited…for that first touch of Sammi’s fingers on her bare flesh—the first time a woman would touch her there. When it came, Eve cried out into Sammi’s hungry mouth.
They kissed hard, ground their bodies together, moaned and panted as each caressed the other.
Eve’s hands moved upward, her fingertips grazing the hooks on Sammi’s bra. It was surreal, so very different from anything she’d ever experienced. Her own nipples hardened as she thought about Sammi’s breasts. She ran her fingertips over the strap, tracing the edges. She stroked between Sammi’s shoulder blades, feeling the play of firm muscle beneath the delicate flesh. She felt tears burn her closed eyes. A soft whimper escaped her throat.
Sammi’s hands explored Eve’s back, more boldly, but gentle in their strokes. She bit Eve’s lower lip while her fingers trailed up Eve’s sides, inching close to her breasts then retreating. With a groan, she wrenched her mouth from Eve’s. “God, I want you,” she whispered in a rush.
“I want you, too. Now.” She thrust her hips into Sammi’s.
Sammi’s eyes widened. “Really?”
“Yes.” Eve captured her mouth again.
“Are you sure?” Sammi murmured against Eve’s lips.
“Yes.” Eve moaned. “Yes. Yes.”
Sammi’s body lurched, and she crushed Eve between herself and the counter. She moved to Eve’s neck and kissed and nipped.
Eve threw her head back, aching for more.
Sammi’s tongue, her lips, her teeth blazed a trail down to the hollow of Eve’s throat before she moved along her collarbone. Her blouse inched open. Need throbbed between her thighs in rhythm with the hard pulse in her temples.
Sammi’s fingers worked the buttons of her shirt. As her mouth moved lower, cool air caressed the moist skin it left in its wake.
Eve imagined that hot mouth on her stiff, aching nipples. What she had been waiting for, without even knowing it, was about to happen, was already happening. A woman was making love to her. Her body raged. It burned. She released a deep sob of exhilaration. Tears flooded her eyes.
“Oh, my God.” Sammi gasped, her mouth suddenly gone, her hands still. “I’m so sorry.”
“Noooo.” Eve pulled her back. “Don’t stop.”
“But what’s the matter? You’re crying.” Sammi wiped the wetness from Eve’s cheeks.
“Please don’t stop.” Eve grasped Sammi’s face and pulled her mouth back to hers. “Kiss me. Please. Don’t stop. It’s just so incredible.”
“You mean you’re crying because it’s good?” Sammi sounded bewildered.
“Yes.” Eve moaned, her pulse still throbbing, her nipples still aching. “So good.” She slid her tongue between Sammi’s lips. She wanted Sammi’s mouth where it’d been, doing what it’d been doing, going to where it’d been going. She guided Sammi lower.
“Wait a minute,” Sammi whispered just as her lips were about to touch the swell of Eve’s breast.
“I don’t want our first time to be up against a counter.”
Why not? Eve’s body screamed. Up against a counter, on the floor. Who cared? “Just do it, Sammi. Please. I need you.”
“Come to my bed with me?” Sammi’s voice was husky, filled with lust. Her eyes burned into Eve’s.
“Yes,” Eve said, but in that briefest of pauses, her doubt reared its slimy little head. What if she didn’t do it right?
Sammi smiled. She took Eve’s mouth in another deep, thirsty kiss.
Eve’s mind went blank.
Sammi reached over and turned off the burner beneath the soup, then wrapped an arm around Eve’s shoulders and guided her out of the kitchen. As they crossed the living room, the doorbell rang. Sammi froze. She looked at the front door, clearly thinking about ignoring it.
A tall blonde waved through the glass panel beside it. Her smile lit her face.
“I knew I should’ve taken those windows out when I bought this place,” Sammi grumbled. She looked to Eve. “I’m sorry.”
Eve smiled and gave a small shrug. While her body still thrummed with arousal, she couldn’t help but wonder who the woman was.
Sammi opened the door. “Hi there,” she
said with a casual air.
“Oh,” the blonde said, her smile dimming. “I know that look.” She glanced at Eve. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt anything. I left you a message on your machine. Did you get it?”
“No. I guess I didn’t check it.”
“Oh. Last time we talked, you said you had some things I left here and I could come by to get them anytime. I was out this way today, so I thought I’d swing by.”
“Oh, yeah, sure.” Resignation tinged Sammi’s voice. “Come on in.”
“It smells good in here,” the blonde said, looking at Eve. “Isn’t Sammi a great cook?”
Eve wouldn’t know, she realized. She’d been in Sammi’s life for about a minute and a half. And this woman, how long had she known Sammi? And who was she?
Sammi shifted her gaze to Eve. “Eve, this is Janet. Janet, this is Eve.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” Eve said.
“Nice to meet you, too, Eve.”
“I’ll get your stuff,” Sammi said to Janet. “Be right back,” she added to Eve, her jaw muscles a little tight.
Alone with Janet, Eve flinched. “I’d better check the soup.” She moved toward the kitchen. “Again, it was nice meeting you.”
“Same here,” Janet said as Eve retreated.
In the safety of the next room, Eve hugged herself. Her mind flooded with unwanted thoughts and questions. Was Janet one of the women Sammi had slept with? Why else would she have things that she’d left here? And if she had things here, it had obviously happened more than once. To have things here and to feel comfortable enough to just drop by without Sammi returning her call, she must’ve been pretty comfortable here. And confident. One of those women who was confident in bed as well, Eve was sure. She looked the type.
What’d she been thinking? She’d almost ended up in Sammi’s bed. Sure, it would’ve been great as long as Sammi was fulfilling all of Eve’s fantasies, thrilling Eve with her touch—she remembered Sammi’s hands on her flesh—but sooner rather than later, Eve would’ve been expected to fulfill Sammi’s fantasies as well. Then what? Eve had been an idiot, letting herself get so out of control. Now, without Sammi’s hands, her lips, her tongue on her, without Sammi’s body rubbing against her, she could reason again. She wasn’t ready. She didn’t know how. She didn’t know if she’d ever be ready for her first time. She was falling in love with Sammi, she knew that, and she couldn’t stand the thought of her being disappointed with their first time together.
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