Room for Recovery

by D. J. Jamison

  “Come here,” Wade said, tugging him to lean against him. He wrapped his arm around Beau, holding him close, and even though it was awkward with the center console between them, Beau’s emotions settled. He felt secure in Wade’s arms.

  “Thanks,” he whispered. “Guess I got a little overwhelmed.”

  “I get it,” Wade said. “This was my first time with a guy too. I’d never gone beyond that first kiss with Carlos.”

  “A Latino lover, huh? I can dig it.”

  Wade laughed softly. “Guess dark hair and big Bambi eyes do it for me.”

  “I don’t have big Bambi eyes,” Beau protested.

  “Oh yeah, you do. Big, innocent eyes—”

  “I just jerked you off.”

  Wade looked down into his eyes. “Hmm. You’re right; they’re less innocent now.”

  “Oh, shut up.”

  They laughed together, and Beau felt almost normal again. “Are you okay with everything?” he asked after a minute. Wade was the one who should be freaking out, not him.

  “Yeah, I’m good,” he said, squeezing Beau tighter against him. “It felt right.”

  “It did,” Beau mused. “But I’ll never be able to face my mom when she starts in on one of her lectures about backseat shenanigans.”

  Wade burst out laughing. Beau had never heard him so free with his emotions, especially laughter. “Oh shit, I’m never going to be able to look her in the eye again.”

  Beau punched his arm. “Asshole.”

  “God, I totally forgot that’s why she didn’t want you to have a car.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Well, maybe now that she knows you’re gay, it won’t come up again ...”

  “Maybe.”

  Wade kissed him, then trailed small kisses across his cheek to his neck. “Does this mean you won’t do this with me again?”

  Beau sighed as Wade’s lips whispered across his skin. “Pretty sure I’d do it right now if you wanted.”

  “Good,” Wade answered, before kissing him again.

  ***

  The weeks leading up to Christmas were the best weeks of Wade’s life. He’d turned in his term paper with a feeling of confidence that was familiar in the way an old, faded photograph sparks a memory. He had done this before, and he was starting to believe he could do it again. The threat of Billy and Jeremy was gone now that the inevitable had happened. They’d been expelled, so Beau didn’t need rides anymore, but Wade continued to pick him up, and Beau didn’t stop him. But the absolute best part of the recent weeks had been the snatches of time he and Beau managed to be alone. Those were few and far between, but each kiss, each gentle touch set Wade free of the prison he’d imposed on himself for so long.

  They often sneaked a kiss here or there while studying, which mainly meant hanging out now that his term paper was in. Tonight, it wasn’t enough.

  “I wish we could go somewhere,” he murmured, nuzzling Beau’s neck.

  Beau leaned into his touch, craning his head to the left to give Wade more access to his skin. “Me too.”

  Wade threaded his fingers into Beau’s hair, then pulled his head back to kiss him.

  “Let’s go for a drive,” he said when he broke the kiss.

  Beau blinked at him with heavy eyes. Wade stood up, prepared to make up a reason they needed to leave when Beau shook his head. “My mom will ask too many questions.”

  Wade sighed. “Too bad you don’t have the first clue about sneaking out. I just had to hook up with a Goodie Two-shoes,” he teased.

  “You think you know me so well,” Beau said. He walked to the window and cranked it open, then slammed a fist against the frame of the screen to pop it loose. He carefully pulled it inside and propped it against the wall, next to the window. “Follow me.”

  Then he stepped out the window onto the roof.

  Wade stared after him, with a mix of surprise and admiration — and no little amount of lust. Watching Beau break the rules was sexy.

  “Hell yeah,” he murmured, following Beau through the second-story window. The roof was mostly flat along this section, so they could walk without much concern for falling. Beau led him to the corner of the house, where the roof began to angle, and pointed to tree branches overhanging the roof.

  “That tree needs to be trimmed,” Wade said.

  “That tree is how I get to the ground,” Beau said with a grin. He reached out and touched a branch, making Wade nervous. The roof was far less flat, and Beau was extending his body over empty space. If he slipped …

  Wade slipped a finger through a belt loop on Beau’s jeans and tugged him back. “You have a death wish,” he said.

  Beau turned to him with a laugh. “I’ve done it a bunch of times. It’s easier than it looks.”

  “Oh yeah? And where were you going when you did all this sneaking around?” Wade asked.

  Beau blushed, glancing out over his backyard. “Nowhere that would excite you. Just hanging out with friends when I was supposed to be grounded. That kind of thing.”

  Wade pretended to gasp. “You’ve been grounded?”

  Beau slugged him in the arm, then nodded back toward his window. “Let’s go back to my window since you’re afraid to climb down the tree.”

  Wade glanced over at the tree. “I’m not afraid. If you want—”

  “It’s okay, I’d rather not,” Beau said. “I’m tired of sneaking around outside or doing gymnastics in the car, you know?”

  Wade nodded, a little disappointed. He wanted more than the brief kisses they shared on study breaks. He wanted to get his hands on Beau’s body and vice versa. After so long fumbling through awkward relationships with no real sexual attraction, his sex drive was primed for action. He wanted Beau all the time. He’d never jerked off so much in his life.

  He followed Beau inside and watched him carefully return the window to its previous state. “I admit, I’m surprised,” he said. “I figured you’d never broken a rule in your life.”

  Beau frowned. “Sometimes, I just want someone to see me and not shove me in a cubbyhole labeled good boy just because I’m a good student. I’m more than my grades or my volunteer hours.”

  Wade dropped onto the bed, watching Beau from across the room. “You want someone to see the real you, all the different sides of you. I can do that.” He paused. “Guess my jokes about you being a Goodie Two-shoes were annoying.”

  Beau smiled. “You could say that.” He rolled his eyes. “Before we became friends, they drove me crazy.”

  Wade grinned. “That’s half the reason I did it.”

  Beau crossed to Wade, placing both hands on his shoulders and pushing him back. When Wade fell onto his back, Beau straddled his hips, sitting over his stomach. “You think you’re such a badass.”

  Wade could tell by Beau’s tone that he didn’t agree.

  “Maybe I am a badass,” he said.

  Beau lowered himself, placing his hands on either side of Wade’s head to hold his weight. Dipping his head, he spoke near Wade’s ear.

  “Wrong,” he whispered. “I see you too.”

  “Be careful,” Wade said seriously, “that shit is scary.”

  “I’ll take my chances,” Beau said, before kissing him. It wasn’t the first time Wade had warned him that getting involved with him was dangerous. Beau was either brave or stupid, but Wade was too caught up in him to fight it.

  He wrapped his arms around Beau’s back and fell into kisses that heated up fast. Unlike the brief kisses they usually exchanged during study sessions, it felt like this was going somewhere.

  “The door is locked,” Beau murmured. “I always lock it just in case.”

  Between kisses, Wade managed to ask, “So, what are you saying?”

  Beau rolled off him, onto his back in the center of the bed. He looked up at Wade shyly. “I’m saying I’m tired of the great outdoors or cramped interiors of cars. I want you in my bed.”

  Wade’s heart skipped a beat, even as his cocked throbbed wi
th excitement. He glanced nervously at the bedroom door.

  “It’s locked,” Beau repeated. “We can be quiet. And really, Wade, when has anyone ever tried to walk in on us while we were working?”

  It had never happened. Beau was right. If they were quiet, it would be fine. But there was always a risk …

  Beau grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head, then popped the button on his jeans. The idea of seeing him fully naked for the first time overrode every other concern. Wade grasped the waistband of Beau’s jeans. Dragging the material down his legs, Wade tossed it to the floor, then repeated his actions with Beau’s boxer briefs, until he was completely bare.

  Wade drank him in. Beau was nearly hairless, with just a thatch of hair around the base of his cock. His legs had a light layer of soft hair, but his chest and face were smooth. His body was long and slim with what seemed like miles of smooth, unblemished skin. His bruises had faded, and Beau had come out of his assault without a single lasting scar.

  A red blush worked its way up Beau’s chest and neck, rivaling the dark flush of color in his cock. When Wade finally tore his eyes from Beau’s body to look at his face, he saw discomfort.

  “Say something,” Beau whispered. “Am I … okay?”

  Wade lowered himself over Beau and kissed his lips gently. “You’re amazing.”

  He kissed him again, this time letting one hand smooth up the expanse of Beau’s thigh, the curve of his ass.

  “Uh, I kind of got naked so you would do the same,” Beau said, sounding nervous. “I want to see you.”

  Wade got off the bed and pulled off his clothes impatiently. It seemed only fair to give Beau what he wanted, but Wade was more interested in touching Beau, exploring his body, than being admired. He toed off his shoes, tore off his shirt, then unbuttoned and shoved down his jeans and underwear. In thirty seconds flat, he was back on top of Beau, kissing his neck.

  Beau laughed softly. “You didn’t even let me look.”

  “Later,” Wade said.

  Beau didn’t complain as Wade kissed his way down his body. When he reached, Beau’s cock, he gripped the base. “Can I?”

  “Yes,” Beau said breathlessly. His chest was heaving with shallow breaths, and his thighs tensed before Wade had even done anything.

  “I’ve been wanting to lick you for years,” Wade murmured, before lifting Beau’s cock and flicking his tongue over the head.

  Beau was circumcised, as he was, so it wasn’t so foreign. He knew his way around his own cock, though he’d never had it in his mouth. The thought alone made him moan. His cock is in my mouth.

  Beau whimpered above him, and Wade realized he was torturing him with teasing licks. He sucked the head into his mouth, slowly working his way down the shaft, using his tongue to slick the way.

  Beau threw a hand over his mouth, biting his fist to muffle his moans, but he couldn’t completely silence the sounds of pleasure, and Wade lived for each quiet whimper as he worked his mouth up and down, tightening suction and learning the shape of Beau’s cock with his lips and tongue.

  Beau lowered his free hand to Wade’s head, fingers tangling in his hair. “Close,” he gasped in warning.

  Wade pulled off just in time. Beau came over his hand in a rush of warmth. Wade just watched the pulse of Beau’s cock, the trembling in his limbs, and felt incredibly proud of himself. He’d totally wrecked Beau in the best way.

  “Fuck,” Beau said, his voice hoarse and shaking.

  “Good?”

  “Yeah,” Beau said, gripping Wade’s shoulder and tugging him forward for a kiss.

  Wade groaned as their skin pressed together and rubbed his cock against Beau’s hip. Beau lowered his hand, fisting his cock, and Wade fucked into his grip as they kissed.

  He’d been painfully hard for the entire blow job, so Beau only had to stroke him while thrusting his tongue into his mouth before he came with a groan.

  When he lifted his head, Beau was watching him with a frown.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, heart lurching as he tried to think of what misstep he’d made.

  “I was going to return the favor,” Beau said. “Use my mouth on you.”

  Wade felt his face go hot, momentarily embarrassed. “Uh, it was so hot, doing that to you,” he said. “I couldn’t hold out.”

  Beau grinned at him. “So, it was good then?”

  “Very good,” he said, dipping to kiss Beau again before rolling off the bed and tugging on his clothes. He couldn’t really clean up, but he did his best to mop up the mess with his underwear.

  “You can get a pair of my boxer briefs, if you want? Second drawer in the dresser.”

  Wade felt weird wearing Beau’s underwear, but it was better than being sticky all the way home, so he pulled out a pair of black boxer briefs and tugged them on. They were snug, but they stretched to accommodate his larger frame, and he could change again as soon as he got home.

  Beau lay on the bed, looking proud of himself, until Wade dumped his clothes next to him.

  “As much as I like you naked, we should probably get presentable,” he said, casting a glance at the door. “Just in case.”

  Beau’s smile dimmed, but he nodded and used his own underwear to wipe off his stomach and hand, then tugged on his jeans commando and pulled on his T-shirt. He looked rumpled and sexy, and Wade couldn’t resist one last kiss.

  “I should go.”

  Beau nodded. “You’re not going to freak out, are you?”

  Wade brushed the back of his hand over Beau’s face. “You don’t have to worry about that anymore,” he said. “I’m in this with you.”

  Beau gave him a shaky smile. “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Boyfriends?”

  Wade hesitated, but as he saw the uncertainty creeping into Beau’s face, he nodded. “I’m not ready to be out, but yeah. I’d love to be your boyfriend.”

  Beau smiled and bounced off the bed. “I’ve never had a boyfriend before.”

  “Me either.”

  Beau brushed a few stray strands of hair back into place on Wade’s head. “I’m glad you’re the first.”

  He kissed him sweetly, kicked his dirty underwear under the bed, and walked him to the door. Wade snagged his backpack that was propped near the door, then squeezed Beau’s hand once before slipping out. As he walked down the hall, he saw Maggie stepping into her bedroom. She paused to toss him a dirty look before closing her door.

  His heart skipped, thinking of what she might have heard if she came upstairs a few minutes sooner. As quiet as they’d tried to be, noise would carry through these thin walls. Being together in a bed, like a real couple, had been incredible, but they couldn’t make a habit of it.

  Chapter 23

  The families converged in the James household on Christmas Day, as usual. Helen’s new boyfriend drove down from Kansas City, so the Ritters were in town for the holiday.

  All day, Beau and Wade danced around each other. They didn’t talk much, finding it too difficult to not flirt or touch, but after dinner and gifts, everyone lounged around. The adults played card games at the dining room table. Maggie and Katy watched Frozen on the television, but while Beau could love a princess, he wasn’t in the mood for yet another holiday movie. Wade had disappeared at some point, which wasn’t uncommon at family gatherings. He’d dealt with Ray’s presence better than Beau had expected, but he often retreated to be alone when they all got together.

  Beau headed for his bedroom, thinking some quiet time sounded good to him too, but stopped short when he heard the soft strum of a guitar.

  He peeked in the door, which was open a few inches. Wade sat on his bed, guitar cradled in his arms as he played. There was a look on his face, a contented expression Beau hadn’t ever seen. Wade had given him a few more lessons in the basics, but Beau had never seen him play for his own enjoyment before.

  Wade glanced up, and his hands stilled, the final strum of the strings lingering between them.r />
  “Don’t stop,” Beau said, stepping inside.

  He sat tentatively at the foot of his bed and placed a hand on Wade’s knee. “It sounded beautiful.”

  Wade looked down, and his bangs slid over his eyes. “It’s just something I was messing around with.”

  “What’s the name of the song?”

  “Under my skin.”

  “Yeah? Who’s the artist? Not sure I know that one.”

  Strangely, Wade reddened before glancing at him shyly. “Uh, it’s me. I wrote it about you.”

  Beau gasped, clapping a hand over his heart. “Really? You’re not pulling my leg?”

  Wade smiled. “Really.”

  “Play it right now,” Beau demanded, and Wade laughed.

  “It’s not finished,” he warned.

  “Don’t care! I want to hear my song.”

  With a smile still on his lips, Wade positioned the guitar and strummed the strings. He hummed softly, not singing many words other than “under my skin” as a chorus, but the melody was beautiful.

  “I’m not done with the lyrics,” he said. “Those take me more time. What do you think? Should I give up on it now or ...”

  Beau launched himself at Wade, kissing him hard. The guitar pressed painfully into his ribs as he sprawled over Wade, but he didn’t care.

  “It’s amazing,” he said breathlessly.

  Wade smiled brightly. “Yeah?”

  “Definitely.”

  Beau kissed him again before Wade pushed him back and sat the guitar on the floor. Then he pushed Beau down onto the mattress and kissed him thoroughly. Wade stretched out on top of him, and the feel of his body pressing Beau down was amazing. He kissed Wade harder, grabbing his ass and squeezing.

  They kept their clothes on, hadn’t been naked together since the last time he had Wade in his bed, in fact. They’d shared plenty of kisses but little else.

  He lifted his hips, pressing up against Wade’s hardness. “Do you want—”