by Amber Garza
“When I said that you were my first kiss, I meant it. Not technically, but here in my heart.” He places a palm on his chest. “The kiss with you stirred things in my heart that no one else ever has before. It felt like my first kiss, because it was the first kiss that ever mattered to me.”
“I feel the same way,” I say. “That’s why I broke it off with Adam. I called him after you left.”
“You did? Tonight?”
I nod.
His face falls. It’s not the reaction I was expecting. “I’m sorry, Sloane. After what you learned about your dad, I should’ve been more understanding. I shouldn’t have pushed you to do that tonight.” His hands run down the length of my arms. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, Cruz. Really.” I grin as if to prove it. “In fact, Adam took it well. Said he knew I’d pick you. Apparently we aren’t as good at keeping our feelings a secret as we had thought.”
“I wish I had never even tried.” His head lowers close to mine, and my heart picks up speed. “Just think. We could have been doing this for years.” His lips sweep over mine, gingerly. I moan quietly, lifting my head, wanting more. “Someone’s eager,” he jokes just before sucking my lower lip into his mouth. After he releases it, he brushes his lips over mine once again. The night air smells like flowers and water. The moonlight illuminates us. It’s magical as he sweeps me into his arms kissing me firmly.
24
cruz
“We should’ve left earlier. It’s hot today.” Sloane wipes sweat from her brow as we jog around a curve in the trail.
“Maybe we would have if someone hadn’t overslept.” I wink at her. She doesn’t turn in my direction though. She keeps her gaze trained in front, her arms tucked up to her body, her back straight. Damn, she even looks hot when she runs.
“That’s because someone kept her up late last night.”
“Who is this someone? I’m gonna kick his ass.”
Sloane giggles. “That someone is my boyfriend, and I’d like to see you try to kick his ass. He’s pretty damn strong.”
My heart flips in my chest at her use of the word “boyfriend.” It’s odd how quickly we’ve slipped into this new relationship. It’s been seamless. I think it proves it was meant to be. When we round another corner, the lake comes into view. As our feet pound on the concrete, I stare at the cool water with longing. I would give anything to jump in right now.
“Wanna take a swim?” I jog closer to Sloane, nudging her gently in the ribs with my elbow.
“I wish,” she says, breathing hard.
“We can.”
“No, we can’t. We’re in running clothes.”
“So?”
She slows down, her neck swiveling. “I’m not skinny dipping with you, Cruz.”
I chuckle. “I hadn’t even thought of that. You really need to get your mind out the gutter.”
Rolling her eyes, she focuses ahead again. “I guess I’ve been hanging around my best friend too much. He’s rubbing off on me.”
“Your best friend? I thought I was your boyfriend now?”
“You’re both,” she replies simply.
God, I like her so much.
Sweat soaks my back, causing my shirt to stick to my flesh. “Seriously, Sloane, let’s jump in the lake. It’s too damn hot out here.”
“I know.” She blows out a breath. “If only I had my suit.”
“We don’t need them. We can just jump in in our clothes. It’s warm enough out that our clothes would dry by the time we got home,” I say. “Besides, it would make the last half of the run easier if our clothes were wet.”
“It is tempting.”
I can tell that I’ve almost convinced her. The water beckons me, so I reach for her hand. “Come on.”
She’s normally so serious about her runs, but it is stinking hot today, and I can tell her resolve is slipping. Even though it’s only nine in the morning, it’s got to be close to a hundred already.
“Okay.” She sighs, allowing me to drag her forward. When we reach the sand, she halts. “Wait. Let me take off my shoes.”
We both kick off our shoes and then walk down to the water in our bare feet. My toe hits a rock, and I curse under my breath.
Sloane reaches out, threading our fingers together. “You okay?”
I nod, my toe still stinging. It’s quiet, the water sharp and still like glass. A couple of bicyclists roll past on the trail when Sloane and I take our first step into the icy water. A chill runs up my calf, but it feels good. I peel off my sweat-soaked shirt and discard it on the ground.
“I hope you don’t think I’m doing that.” Sloane eyes it, a splash of blue in the sand.
“You might be more comfortable if you did.” I tug at the bottom of her shirt.
She wriggles away from me. “It’s okay. I’ll take my chances.” With her fingers still curled around mine, she steps further into the water. We walk hand in hand until the water is up to our waists. Then I release our fingers and dive under. The water is so cold it steals my breath. When I break the surface, I gulp in the air.
“You’re crazy.” Sloane shakes her head.
“Hey, it’s easier if you just do it.” I swim toward her, water trickling from my hair into my eyes. It beads in my eyelashes, and I blink in an effort to see.
Sloane reaches out and wipes the liquid away. Circling my hand around her wrist, I draw her to me. She sinks lower in the water as I drag her until she’s up to her neck, her long brown hair skating along the top. When she reaches me, I loop my arms around her waist. Her chest bumps mine, and then she brings her legs up to straddle me, interlocking her ankles at my back. Our noses touch as we bob in the gentle waves we created. Her shirt is white. I just noticed that. Too bad she’s wearing a dark green sports bar under it.
“Damn, you’re sexy,” I say.
She bites her lip. “Really?”
“Yeah. Really.”
“It’s so weird hearing you say that.”
“Why?”
“Because you never have before.”
I smile. “I was always thinking it though.”
“So was I.” Her gaze lowers to my bare chest and her hands follow. She splays her palms over my stomach and then glides her hands up, her fingers exploring every ridge, every muscle. I stay still, afraid to even breathe. When her hands reach my shoulders, she curves them around my neck. “I’ve sort of always wanted to do that.”
“Well, don’t stop now.” I lean forward, suspending my lips over her ear. “You know what I’ve always wanted to do?”
She shivers. “I’m kind of afraid to ask.”
“Then don’t,” I whisper. “I’ll just show you.” Dropping my lips, I brush them over her ear and down to her neck. She arches her back, and I press my lips to the inside of her neck. A tiny gasp sounds in her throat. Her hands lower back down to my chest, her fingers skating over my skin. Goosebumps rise, coating my flesh. I pepper kiss all along her neck and collarbone, enjoying the feeling of her hands on my chest. Once I reach her chin, I leave a trail of caresses up to her lips.
She breathes out, parting her lips when my mouth hovers hers. I pull her as close as possible, our bodies so close it’s as if we’re fused together. And that’s how I like it. I want to be as close to Sloane as two people can be. Her hands slip out from between us and grip my neck.
“Kiss me,” she breathes.
God, it’s the sexiest thing anyone’s ever said to me.
“It’s not something you ever have to beg for, Sloane. I’d never stop kissing you if I had my way.” Tilting my head, our lips brush. I nip her lower lip with my teeth and she giggles. “Have I ever told you how much I love your laugh?”
She shakes her head, her fingers tickling the tender flesh on the back of my neck. “You’ve always teased me about it.”
“You know teasing is my love language, right?”
“I thought kissing was.” She throws me a challenging look, her gaze landing on my lips.
“Damn, someone’s impatient.”
“You did promise to never stop kissing me. Problem is, you haven’t even started.”
“Oh, I’ll start.” I gingerly press my lips to hers, just one little peck. More of a tease than anything. “And then I’ll kiss you until you can’t stand it,” I whisper against her mouth. The scent of her apple shampoo and mint toothpaste lingers. Then I graze her lips with mine, slowly, softly. Her grip on my neck tightens, her fingernails grazing my skin. It excites me, and I want to kiss her hard. But I don’t. No, I want it to last this time. I want to drag it out, to savor every minute. It will be a kiss to rival all other kisses.
And hopefully, it will completely erase the one she had with Mr. Quarterback.
I draw back, touching her lips with the tips of my fingers. Then I lean forward and gently kiss her all around the edges of her lips. For one second I close my lips around hers. She opens her mouth, ready. But instead of giving her what she wants, I dart my tongue out, licking softly along her bottom lip. She breathes hard, her eyes closed. Damn, it’s almost too much. Her hands curve around the back of my head, her fingers massaging up into my hair. Her legs are still tightly woven around my middle, and I can feel the beating of her heart against my bare chest. I can’t go slowly anymore. It’s physically impossible at this point. Thrusting my tongue into her mouth, I kiss her hard. Our tongues slide together, our lips moving in sync. I’m glad my feet are solidly locked in the sand, because I feel dizzy and out of control as if I could float away at any moment. Honestly, I’d gladly float away with Sloane in my arms, her lips on mine. I could be lost at sea and I wouldn’t want for anything if she was with me. I could live on her kisses, feed on her lips, and find sustenance in her arms. And we wouldn’t have to worry about our family issues, or school, or friends. It could be blissful.
The kiss deepens, going from slow and steady to fast and manic. Our mouths move swiftly, our tongues battling it out, our hands and fingers dancing as if they have a mind of their own.
When our lips reluctantly separate, Sloane shivers in my arms.
“Cold?” I ask.
She nods.
“Let’s get out then. In this heat we’ll warm up in no time.” I stamp a kiss on her forehead as she releases her legs. As much as I hate it, I unhook my arms and move away from her.
“Cruz.” She stops me.
“Yeah?”
“That was…” her eyes shift as if she’s trying to come up with the right word. It reminds me of how I look when I’m writing a song. When I’m trying to figure out the perfect word to convey what I’m feeling. “Incredible is the word that comes to mind, but it doesn’t seem to do it justice.”
“No, you’re right. It doesn’t. But I’ll take it.”
“You know, I thought dating Adam was my dream come true.”
Her words slam into me like a sucker punch. I don’t even see them coming, but they pummel me, and I worry I might fall down from the strength of them. “Wow, you sure know how to ruin a moment.”
“No. Let me finish.” She reaches for me, her hands on my chest again. Damn, if she keeps touching me like this she can say whatever the hell she wants. I can’t think clearly anyway. “What I’m trying and failing to say is….”
“I’ll give you a minute to gather your thoughts. I don’t want you just blurting out shit about some other dude,” I say.
“Sorry. It was supposed to be a compliment.”
“You might want to work on them.”
She peers up at me, her gaze colliding with mine. The intensity behind her eyes makes me grow serious. “Cruz, you’re my dream come true. You’re a dream I didn’t even know I had.” Her hands slide up my chest. “And now that I know, I never want to wake up.”
“You don’t have to.” I clutch both of her hands. “Ever.”
25
sloane
“Have you told your parents about us yet?” Cruz sits on my bed, my head in his lap. His fingers play in my hair, causing chills to race up and down my spine.
“No, have you?”
“Yes,” he says.
“How’d they take it?” I pick up one of his hands, circling my fingertips over his skin.
“Just like I knew they would. They were happy about it.”
“They were?”
“Of course. You know they love you.” He brings my hand up to his lips and kisses my knuckles. “Why haven’t you told your parents yet?”
“I’ve been sort of avoiding them,” I admit.
“You still haven’t talked to your dad about Kacey?”
My body goes rigid at the sound of her name, and I shake my head.
“You’ll have to at some point you know.”
“Yeah, I know.” I sigh.
“I’ll be there with you, if it’s helpful.”
“Thanks.” I peer up at him. “But it doesn’t have to be today.” Smiling, I sit up. “Besides, I don’t want to talk about my parents right now. I don’t even want to think about them.” I frame his face with my hands.
“Are you trying to distract me?”
“Is it working?”
“Hell yeah.”
Giggling, I smother his mouth with mine. His arms come around me, his hands gliding up my back. Then they sweep up into my hair, gathering the long strands in his palms. Chills skate down my spine as his lips explore mine with an intense hunger, his tongue swirling in my mouth. Gently he guides my back down onto the bed, his body hovering mine. Straddling me, he continues kissing me, slowing down every once in awhile and then ramping back up again. His hands skate across my stomach and around my hips. Reaching up, I slide my hands under his shirt, my fingers skimming his muscles. They flex beneath my fingertips, exciting me.
“Whoa, what’s going on in here?”
I’m startled by her voice. Cruz leaps off of me like I’m on fire.
“Regan? What are you doing here?” I sit up, smoothing down my disheveled hair with my fingers. Cruz stands awkwardly next to my bed, pulling his shirt back down over his stomach. But not before I catch a glimpse of his abs, a splash of black hair. It makes me want to tell Regan to get the hell out so Cruz and I can get back to what we were doing. But I know I can’t do that. I can tell Cruz is thinking the same thing, though, when his gaze shifts to mine briefly.
“Nice to see you too. I would think you’d have a warmer welcome for the sister you haven’t seen in months.” She leans against my doorframe, her long dark hair sleek against her face. In her floral top, khaki shorts and flats, she looks even prettier than the last time I saw her. It makes me feel frumpy in comparison.
Tucking my legs under my body, I lick my lips. “I’m sorry. Of course I’m happy to see you. I’m just surprised, that’s all.”
“Didn’t Mom tell you I was coming?”
“No. I haven’t really been talking to her.”
“Yeah. She told me.”
“So you know?” I venture.
“About Kacey, yes.” She glances between Cruz and me, her lips curling at the edges. “About this, no. But I can’t say that I’m surprised. You two have been in love since grade school.”
My cheeks flush. “Is that why you’re here?” I change the subject. “Because of Kacey?” Saying her name leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, and I swallow it down.
“Yeah,” she admits.
“So you’re going to talk to Dad?”
She nods. “And you need to as well.”
I wrinkle my nose.
“We can’t change what’s happened, Sloane, but we’re a family, so we have to deal with it.”
God, I hate when Regan is home. She’s always so bossy. I like it better when she’s gone. It’s not that I don’t like my sister, it’s just that she’s larger than life. She sucks up all the energy in the room, leaving nothing for the rest of us. Let’s say I breathe easier when she’s not around.
“Fine.” I groan.
“I’m going to put my stuff away.” She gives Cruz a stern look. “I tru
st you two will be on your best behavior?”
“You’re not my mom, Regan.”
She shakes her head. “No, but if Mom were home she’d say the same thing.”
I stick out my bottom lip in a pout. Seriously, how does Regan always bring out the bratty kid in me?
“You’re cute when you pout,” Cruz says when Regan leaves.
“Sorry. She totally ruined our day.”
Cruz sits on the edge of my bed. “Nothing’s ruined. I still get to be with my girl. There’s nothing better than that.”
His words melt my heart. Regan may be home, but I’ve got Cruz on my side. And that’s the only thing that matters to me right now.
I try to hole up at Cruz’s all evening, but Miss Bossypants doesn’t let me. She comes over to Cruz’s and drags me back home. I’m glad Regan’s not my mom. She’s way stricter than Mom is, that’s for sure.
“We’re a family, Sloane,” she lectures me when we get back to our house. “And families work through their issues.”
“You know, we were all perfectly content with how things were before you blew into town.” I follow her into the kitchen and sink down into one of the wooden chairs around the kitchen table.
“Denial is not the answer.” Regan opens the freezer door and sticks her head inside.
“Is that what they teach you in psychology 101?” Regan is studying to be a psychiatrist. I think she’ll be great at the job. She loves telling people how to run their lives.
“That’s not even a class, Sloane.” She reappears, a carton of ice cream in her hand.
After grabbing two spoons, she joins me at the table placing the carton in the center. When we were kids we shared ice cream like this all the time. It used to royally piss off Dad. But he’s not home yet. And he wouldn’t care anyway. In order to even notice me lately my name would need to be Kacey.
“Oh, this is nice.” Mom sweeps into the kitchen wearing a pair of sweatpants and t-shirt, her hair tied back at the nape of her neck. “Both of my girls are home and sharing ice cream just like old times.”