Clawing Free

by Josh Roberts

  She knew he was leading her to something, and that he would never purposely hurt her, but his questions were coming dangerously close to pushing her over the edge on which she was already precariously perched.

  “Because if I can’t understand a thing, then I can’t control it.”

  A heavy silence hung between them. Lissy stared at him, and he returned the look.

  “So then, what do you do?” he asked as if she would actually have an answer.

  She looked away, eventually standing and saying, “I’m sorry I interrupted you.”

  Lee stood as well, gently grabbing her arm. “You attempt to better understand that which you can’t explain. As to whether you can control it, that’s still an unknown. But the closer you come to knowing a thing, the less likely you are to let it control you.”

  She froze, ready to storm out but desperately wanting the understanding he spoke about. Staring at him, she had the fleeting thought that if her dad were still alive, maybe she’d be talking to him instead.

  “And how would you recommend I attempt something like that? Go back to the lake and get my face ripped off? Pick up a book on the Loch Ness monster? I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

  “Maybe I can help with that.” He stood and moved around his desk, using a key from his lanyard to open a locked drawer. He removed a thick folder and brought it around to her.

  Lissy looked at the folder and then up at Lee. “This has been more than a passing thought for you then?”

  “You could say that. Alternatively, you could also say it’s been an obsession of mine for a couple of years.” He sat, extending an open hand toward the seat beside him, signaling her to sit back down. She did.

  He spread the folder open on the desk in front of them, revealing a huge stack of paper and pictures. Just as he did, Ganesh came back through the front door, lunch in hand.

  “Ganesh. Why are you back?” Lee asked gruffly.

  “I—”

  “Was just heading out again,” Lee interrupted.

  “Lee, it’s cold out—”

  “Good thing you have a coat.” Lee gave him a cold stare until the man exited the office for a second time.

  Without missing a beat, Lee took the top few photos off the stack. They were all various types of creatures. Lissy recognized some of them, but not many.

  He continued splaying the photos out as he spoke. “In the roughly five thousand years of documented history we have access to, there have been two types of things maintained. There’s been the mainstream thread—the history you hear about in school and read about in textbooks—and then there is the other kind of history, the one they don’t teach you about.” He tapped one of the photos. It appeared to be an animal, but not a normal one. It looked like a dog crossbred with a boar maybe. “But the fringe stuff survived and gained strength via oral history, tradition, and even written documentation if you look hard enough.”

  “What is all this?” she asked.

  “Animals, creatures, archetypes—whatever you want to call them—that have persisted over time, remaining in their culture’s narrative for hundreds of years. The interesting thing about each of them isn’t the form the characters take—a dog, a spirit, a bird—it’s that the stories exist at all.”

  “I don’t get it. People make this kind of stuff up all the time. Why does the existence of folklore matter?” She continued examining the pictures as he spoke.

  “Because every culture, every religion, every country on every continent in the world has them. Buddhists have the Preta; the people of Mexico have the Chupacabra. The vetala are widely feared in Hindu mythology. Then there are zombies, goblins, dragons, cyclops, hydras, and the list goes on and on. The Bible even has the water-dwelling Leviathan, said only to be assailable to God himself. Our history is full of monsters—or what people deem monsters until they better understand what they’ve actually encountered.”

  “Yeah, but people aren’t out there every day realizing their local folklore was true the whole time. This stuff is fed by paranoia. Godzilla was the result of Japanese fears instilled by the atomic bomb in the Second World War. Why is this any different?”

  “You’re right, half of these are probably crap. Maybe even eighty percent. But what if a portion—say four percent—are real? That’s still a couple hundred, Lis.” He shifted the remaining photos from the stack and moved to the documents beneath them. “And more of them have been ratified than you might think.”

  He pulled out a typed list from the pile and placed it atop the photos. “I mentioned the giant squid; that creature’s been a myth since 1873. Then there’s the narwhal, an Arctic whale with a unicorn horn. Cultures have been talking about it since the Middle Ages. Komodo dragons, okapi, gorillas, even the duck-billed platypus. They were all considered myths at one point.

  Lee shifted in his seat, facing Lissy. “Listen, I’m not saying that there’s a legendary creature killing these people at the lake. But I am asking this: What if there’s something out there that we just haven’t noticed yet. It’s been happening for millennia; I don’t believe we’re exempt.”

  Lissy stared into his eyes. He really believed what he was saying. And the scary thing was, an undiscovered creature was beginning to sound more plausible than anything she’d come up with.

  She looked at the pictures on the desk again before asking, “Can I borrow these?”

  17

  August 26, 2019

  Lissy observed Neil as the crowd dispersed. His face was grey under the darkening sky. The service had been short but still nice. As nice as a funeral could be. The turnout was small, as had been expected. It pained her to know that for the past eleven years she’d wished for David’s death, blaming him for what happened to Mia. Yet in the end, his funeral only left her feeling empty and alone.

  Bishop Wilson, founder of the only church in Mitchum, had done most of the speaking. Neither Neil nor Todd was much on ceremony. David was gone, and their talking about it wouldn’t change that fact.

  Neil shook the hands of several townspeople as they left the cemetery, hugged Albert and Rose, and thanked the preacher for speaking. He was cordial and polite, but Lissy could see below the surface to what lay beneath—boiling hot anger. It wasn’t that he’d said something to tip her off; it was the opposite. He hadn’t said anything of value since their discussion just two nights before. She knew he hadn’t stopped thinking about it any more than she had, so his silence on the subject unnerved her.

  Todd and Yunjin approached her and Neil at the graveside.

  “The bishop’s words were very kind,” Yunjin said, her eyes still wet with tears.

  “They were,” Neil replied flatly.

  “Would you two like to join us for a bite to eat?” Todd asked. Lissy remembered from when she was younger that Todd wasn’t one to discuss his feelings, or even hint at them in public. She knew that inside he was hurting just as much as Yunjin and Neil, but he would keep a strong front.

  “I think I’ll pass,” Neil replied, glaring to the side at nothing in particular.

  Todd challenged him softly, “You have to eat, Neil.”

  Neil’s gaze shot up to match his uncle’s as if he was going to clap back. But he must have thought better of it, because all he said was, “I will.”

  Todd patted him on the shoulder, nodded to Lissy, and began the walk to their car. Yunjin hugged them both, speaking softly to Neil as she squeezed him tight. “We are here, Neil. You know that.”

  He nodded and looked away, attempting to conceal the tears welling in his eyes.

  After his family drove away, only Lissy and Neil stood beside the grave, staring at the urn that now contained the remnants of David Sheridan. Neither of them spoke.

  Lissy’s mind wandered to the lake, it’s seduction only mounting after the discussion with Neil. She remembered the momentous feeling when she stepped out of the forest the morning she’d found Melissa. Had she known something would change her life that day? How could sh
e have known? She couldn’t have.

  She looked up, realizing Neil was no longer standing beside her. He’d started off toward the truck without saying a word.

  Running to catch up with him, she grabbed his hand, holding it as they walked. He didn’t shrug her off, but his hand didn’t tighten around hers either.

  “How you doing?” she asked.

  “I’m okay.”

  “Neil, you know you can talk—”

  “Talk about what, Lis? Where should I start? My brother burning alive? How my life is cursed? How it took finding a dead woman to jar you enough to even take a second glance in my direction?” He spewed the venomous words at her without pause. “I’ve been trying to talk to you for eleven years and you were content to ignore me. Let’s not try to change it now.”

  His words cut deep. It was the cruelest thing he’d ever said to her. She let her hand slip from his. He didn’t protest.

  “I’ll catch up with you later,” she said, stopping beside the truck.

  He paused for an instant, about to say something, but didn’t. Lissy felt numb as she watched him drive away. He’d given up on her. Two weeks earlier he would’ve never said something like that. He was changing rapidly, and she was ill equipped to stop the transformation. And if she was completely honest with herself, she was changing, too, another apparent reality that she had no say in. She was losing Neil and she was losing herself.

  “Elisabeth?”

  She started, spinning around to find the bishop coming up the hill.

  “I apologize. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

  “It’s okay. I just didn’t realize anyone was still around.” She attempted to mask her emotional state, but the tears were already beginning to flow. She sniffed and wiped her eyes.

  “I understand. Death is a complicated thing.” He glanced past her to where Neil’s truck had been. “Siblings tend to share a very special bond. When that bond is broken, it hurts immensely.”

  “I know,” she said, still fighting back the tears.

  He blushed, obviously remembering Lissy’s own loss.

  “Of course.” He nodded, beginning to turn and then pausing. “Do you need a ride?”

  “I’ll walk. Thanks though.”

  He nodded again.

  As she walked, Lissy considered what to do next. While she still feared being alone, she didn’t know if she wanted Neil around after what he’d just said to her, or if he would even try to come back. Maybe he’d really meant it. Or maybe he was just hurting, lashing out from a place of immeasurable pain.

  After several minutes of walking, it occurred to her how unfair she was being, viewing herself as the victim in all of this. He wasn’t wrong. He’d been in love with her for years, and she’d knowingly sidelined him. Her defense mechanism had no doubt been a constant source of pain for him. She guessed she’d always, at some level, assumed he would be there, waiting for her when she was finally ready to tear down the walls she’d erected between them. It had been her belief that if their relationship didn’t progress, it would be due to her continuous decision to keep him at arm’s length. Now that it was his choice, it brought to light how much she actually did care for him. Not to mention how much she relied on him to be a source of strength in her life.

  His words played over and over in her mind. Even in the state he was in, she couldn’t believe he’d spoken to her so harshly. They had been through the loss of his parents and her sister, and he’d never even come close to saying something spiteful.

  As she turned into the alley behind the market, after the hundredth time of recounting his words, it was as if she were struck by lightning, revelation flooding her. The Neil she’d known her entire life would never say something like that to her. No matter the circumstance. Something was off, and it wasn’t that he was angry with her.

  She charged toward the apartment, hoping to find Neil already there. As she ran, thoughts blitzed her mind, a million fiery arrows bombarding her. Each thought gave a different form to the same question. What was Neil planning to do? It should have been blatantly obvious to her that he wasn’t pissed, not at her anyway. He’d simply used his words to dig at her, knowing she would leave him alone if he hurt her.

  As she reached the market, she knew immediately he wasn’t there. His truck wasn’t in the alley. She continued running straight to her car. There was no question where he’d gone.

  * * *

  Raindrops spattered on the windshield as Lissy sped past the sign stating that Diamond Lake was closed to the public, the steering wheel shaking as she accelerated.

  She’d already called the sheriff, and he said he would be right behind her. He’d told her to turn around, to let him handle it. But she couldn’t. She had to try to get to Neil before he did something stupid or encountered whatever had gone after his brother. The thought of Neil dead on the ground with three gashes down his face needled at her mind.

  Worried her little car couldn’t make it through the mud, she slammed on the brakes in front of the path leading to the lake. The vehicle’s old tires skidded across the pavement. She shoved the shifter into park and jumped out, slipping on the wet gravel. It took a second to right herself before she could begin running. But as she got deeper and deeper into the woods, she slowed, realizing it was dusk. Night was coming. She was paralyzed by being at the lake at night, her fear only compounded by thoughts of sitting beside Melissa’s dead body, shivering in the dark.

  Standing amid the trees, already starting to quake in fear, she almost turned back. The storm overhead was intensifying as segments of the visions played through her mind. The scenes felt eerily similar to the moment she was heading into. This might be it, she thought, the moment she’d seen in her mind’s eye.

  Lightning flashed and thunder clapped above her. She flinched, ducking as if to dodge the lightning. Standing again, she knew she had to decide whether to turn back and leave Neil to whatever fate came, or try to stop it. She thought of Mia, and of Melissa, and knew there was no choice to be made.

  She did her best to ignore the terror plaguing her as she ran toward the lake. It was only minutes later that she burst through the tree line and stopped dead in her tracks. She’d expected to see something akin to her visions being played out. She’d assumed she would glimpse Neil standing at the edge of the cliff above, looking out at the water, and then she’d spot the shadow emerging from the lake, rising to put him to death. But she didn’t see any of that.

  She saw Neil on his knees at the lake’s edge. The water was calm, the rain lightly sprinkling its surface. It was like the storm had dissipated in a matter of minutes. There was only a breeze, as there almost always was in the mountains—nothing like her visions.

  She approached Neil from behind, his sobs becoming more prevalent the closer she came. Upon reaching him, she almost spoke but decided to keep quiet. She simply sat beside him in the rain.

  He continued to cry, words slowly bubbling to the surface. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I just—it didn’t even come. It’s not here. There’s nothing . . .” He trailed off into more tears.

  Lissy wrapped an arm around him, at a loss for words. She’d been in his shoes before, the shoes of someone who’d lost their own life in the form of another and just needed to face the person—or the thing—that had taken them from you. But as always, the one cowardly enough to take life in the confines of the dark is not simply going to show up when summoned in the light of day. Maybe that’s what this was all about. The ones left behind, the pain of being forsaken. Maybe the actual targets weren’t those who’d been buried or burned, but the ones left in their wake to suffer without them.

  Without warning, Neil jumped to his feet and began shouting through the rain. “Where are you now? You . . . you coward! You take and take and then hide when confronted? Well, I’m here now, so come out!”

  Just as Lissy stood to calm him, she heard a peal of thunder. The sound was so close and so piercing that she almost jumped out of her skin. The s
ky was dark within an instant; pitch-black clouds rolled in, and the moon disappeared behind them.

  “That’s right!” Neil yelled.

  “Neil—”

  “I can’t just—”

  “Neil, we have to go!”

  He ignored her warnings. She yanked at him, but he only shrugged her off. The wind howled, whipping the pines violently from side to side, the trees groaning under the strain.

  “I’ve seen this! Neil, I’ve seen this! We have to—”

  Another peal of thunder crashed over her words, the accompanying lightning striking the lake with an explosion that cast light throughout its entirety. However, it wasn’t the lightning, or the thunder that stole the breath from Lissy’s chest. It was what she’d seen during the split-second the lake was illuminated.

  Beneath the water’s surface, there was a mass—a silhouette—contrasting with the fiery light. It was this darkness amid the glow that caused the color to drain from her face. She was paralyzed, unable to move or think, crippled by terror.

  And then, with rain pouring over his face, Neil cried out, “You’re weak! Spineless!” Then under his breath he muttered, “Show yourself, monster.”

  At his words, the darkness began to emerge, the figure breaching the surface just as it had in Lissy’s vision, only this time it was more than just a shadow.

  The first thing she saw was its enormous head, the head of a dragon, with row upon row of jagged teeth. Then there were dark, sinuous spikes jutting from its crown, and the most horrifying eyes Lissy had ever seen. They were black and completely void of life, windows into a vacuum, wholly and completely empty.

  She screamed and attempted to jerk Neil away, to run. But he stood firm, seemingly unfazed by the monster’s appearance, mumbling curses under his breath.

  “Neil—”

  The beast roared, easily drowning out the thunder with its volume. Then, as if to accentuate its immensity, the monster’s bellow crescendoed into a low, bassy growl, emitting from deep within its gut.