Roberts, Sarah - His Sugar Baby (Siren Publishing Allure)

by Sarah Roberts

  “His—his name is Michael. Now, that’s enough questions,” said Cathy firmly.

  Chloe glanced up with a surprisingly knowing gleam in her brown eyes. “Is he cute?”

  “Chloe!” Cathy couldn’t help laughing. “Just how old are you, anyway? Is he cute! Yes, he is! Now take your nap.” Cathy kissed her daughter’s forehead.

  Giggling, Chloe snuggled into the pillows. “’Night, Mommy.”

  Cathy smiled down at her tenderly. “’Night, baby.” She turned off the light, leaving only a nightlight on in the bedroom. She stepped out and closed the door, only part way so that it would be easy to hear if Chloe called her.

  Her smile fell away as she walked into the small living room. She pressed her hands against her stomach as she bent at the waist. Her hair swung forward, brushing her shoulders. A boyfriend like everyone else! She thought she was going to be sick. Chloe. Pammy. Vicky. The list of people that she was lying to kept getting longer.

  * * * *

  It wasn’t easy to line up a list of sitters for Chloe. Cathy felt that she simply could not leave her with the typical teen babysitter. Chloe was a special-needs child. She needed someone with her at all times who would know what to do if there was ever an emergency.

  Cathy was indebted to her friend, Barbara Beasely, who was able to supply a few names of professional nurses that she said could be trusted, and for a while, it seemed to be working out.

  The transfer of her work to her home was surprisingly smooth. She was able to accomplish nearly everything from her computer or over the phone. There were days, however, that she did have to go in to the office for short periods of time. On those days, she was usually able to secure the services of a home nurse. However, arranging for a sitter for Chloe for the late evenings, evenings she was supposed to spend with Michael, was more challenging. The acrobatics in organization that it demanded was frustrating. It was difficult, if not impossible, for her to stay overnight with him. She was aware that his patience was wearing thin with her excuses.

  Cathy had known it would not be easy, but she hadn’t realized that actually coordinating time with Michael would be even more difficult than she had expected. She couldn’t rely on Vicky or on any of her other friends every time that she was unable to get a home nurse, especially those times when Michael called her at the last minute.

  She should have set some boundaries, she thought, but truthfully, that had never been an option. The terms of their arrangement had been the same from the beginning. She was supposed to be free whenever he wanted her to join him, and that was what he was paying for.

  Eventually, the day came when all of her resources fell through. She had to cancel with Michael. Then it happened again, and again. She knew that he was becoming unhappy with the way things were going, but there wasn’t anything more that she could do. Cathy was frazzled by her efforts to juggle the pieces of her life and feeling increasing pressure.

  One rainy evening, matters came to a head. Michael called to ask her to come over later that night. Cathy was both angered and frustrated. She had just put Chloe to bed for the night. It was impossible to call anyone to stay with her daughter at such short notice. She didn’t want to leave her, besides. Michael was being unreasonable to expect her to just drop everything and rush over. After all, he was aware that she was a single mother.

  Cathy quietly closed her daughter’s bedroom door. She didn’t want to disturb Chloe with her end of the conversation. She carried the cell phone back into the living room. She heard the rain drumming outside. “I’m sorry, Michael. I can’t meet with you this evening or tomorrow. I can’t get a sitter.”

  There was a short silence. “I think there’s more to it than that. You didn’t have a problem with sitters before. Has your schedule changed? Are you working into the evenings now? I’m willing to work around it, Winter.”

  “It’s not that.” Cathy hesitated, reluctant as always to mention anything about her daughter. He wasn’t to know any more than what she had already told him. There was no way that she was going to explain the true situation. “I just have some personal concerns going on in my private life right now.”

  “Are you seeing someone else?”

  “No, of course not!” Cathy was stunned. The very idea was so far out there that she could only shake her head. When would she possibly have the time to see anyone else?

  “Just tell me how we can work around this impasse.”

  “We can’t.” Her stark reply took her by surprise, but once she had said it, she realized it was true. She couldn’t continue to see him like this. She felt a sense of relief that she had finally faced the decision. “Michael, I’m really sorry. It’s difficult for me right now. It isn’t easy to get away. Maybe we shouldn’t plan on getting together anymore.”

  “That is unacceptable, Winter.”

  “Michael, we’ve been seeing each other nearly every day. I can’t do it anymore.” She paced the carpet, tightening her fingers on the sides of the cell. “I don’t see why this is such a problem. Just…let it go.”

  “It’s a problem because I want to see you!”

  “Michael, you told me in the beginning, when we started this thing, that you’d only want to see me once or twice a week!” she said, her voice rising. “It’s a lot more than that now!”

  There was another silence, one fraught with tension. She knew he was still on the line, but she couldn’t hear anything.

  “You’re right. I did say that. But things changed.”

  “Well, I’d like to change it back,” she snapped. “I want to go back to our original agreement or call it off completely.”

  Her fingers were so tight on the phone that they began to cramp while she waited for him to say something. His reply was slow in coming. When he spoke, she could hear the reluctance, underlaid by annoyance, in his voice. “All right. You win. We’ll revert back to our original agreement. I’m not happy about it.”

  Cathy was staggered. She didn’t know what to say. He thought that she had laid down an ultimatum, when all she had been thinking about was severing their affair. She closed her eyes as relief washed through her again but for quite another reason. “I’ll miss you, Michael,” she said quietly.

  “I’m counting on it.” There was no mistaking the suppressed anger in his tone. “Look, I’ll call you later in the week.”

  “Okay.” Cathy shut the cell and returned Winter’s phone to her purse. She stood still, purse still in her hands, while she frowned over her thoughts. Nothing had actually been resolved. Michael had conceded, very reluctantly, to honor the terms of their original agreement, but that probably wouldn’t last. Michael was highly sexual. She couldn’t believe that he would be satisfied with going back to the way things had been before. For that matter, she didn’t know whether she could. She had gotten used to frequent and very-good sex.

  Cathy sighed because she could foresee more confrontations, more frustration. It might be better if she called him right back and told him that she had reconsidered and just wanted to end it after all. That would be cleaner and probably easier in the long term. She would not compromise her time with Chloe.

  The reasons to keep the affair going, dependable transportation and getting the bills paid, still existed. If worse came to worst, and she and Michael split up, the Lexus would have to go back. That would hit her first and the hardest. Cathy worried at her lower lip with her teeth. Maybe she could save back some of Winter’s money for two or three months. Then she wouldn’t be caught at a complete stand. She would start asking around now if someone knew of a decent used car. As for the bills, well, those would be with her for a very, very long time, late fees and all.

  Chapter Eighteen

  The following week, Winter was able to meet Michael for an early dinner at a casual family-style restaurant, and she had dressed accordingly. Michael’s appreciative glance slid over her soft clinging sea-blue sweater and her skinny black jeans. “You look nice.” His palm settled warmly in the small of h
er back as they made their way to a table.

  After they had placed an order, Michael handed her an American Express gift card. “As you see, I didn’t forget. I hope you buy something that I’ll want to tear off you.”

  Despite the casual way he spoke, there was banked heat in his ice-blue eyes. Winter felt her body warming under his intense perusal. She dropped her own gaze, ostensibly so that she could get out her pocketbook and slip the gift card inside. “Okay, Michael. I’ll keep that in mind. Thank you.” She was actually a little surprised that, after their heated discussion, he had given the gift card to her. It was nice that he didn’t seem to be holding a grudge. His pleasant demeanor during dinner seemed to bear out her interpretation of his mood, and they had a good time together.

  Afterward, Michael suggested that they take a walk in the nearby greenbelt before it got dark. “You’re wearing flats. Are they comfortable enough to walk in?’

  Winter nodded. “I’d like to walk.” She hadn’t used the area’s hiking and biking trails for a long time. Before Chloe had gotten sick, she had often taken her to the park that adjoined the greenbelt.

  They had driven separate vehicles to the restaurant. Winter followed Michael’s Porsche to the parking area. She drew the Lexus up in the neighboring parking slot. As she got out, she reached for the lightweight jacket lying on the passenger seat and slipped it on. The season was beginning to change. The first cold front had blown in, clearing out the overcast skies of the past week. The temperature had dropped several degrees while they had been in the restaurant, and it was actually chilly enough that Winter was glad of her hip-length jacket.

  Michael was waiting for her. He smiled and caught her hand. Their hands clasped together, they set off at a leisurely pace under the large oak trees arching overhead. The gravel crunched under their feet.

  Winter breathed in the crisp air. It was good to be outdoors. She had hardly gotten out of the apartment at all that week, except to take Chloe to the hospital for her routine checkup. That didn’t exactly count as a pleasure outing. However, Chloe couldn’t be out in public places around a lot of other people. There was too much risk of infectious cold germs or pollen or any of a hundred other things that wouldn’t be a hazard to anyone else.

  The trail widened to a vantage point that overlooked a grassy clearing, where people congregated around a playground with a bright-yellow curlicue slide, climbing platforms, bridges and swings. Children clambered over the equipment, their shrill voices noisy.

  Michael stopped. He set his back to a tree trunk and drew her into his arms. Slowly, he kissed her. Then he turned her around to settle against his chest, his arms wrapped around her and his cheek resting against her hair. She clasped her own hands over his where they spanned her waist. She could feel his warmth seeping through her clothes.

  “I like being with you, Winter.” His voice was low and husky in her ear, and his breath teased her skin.

  Winter smiled. She squeezed his hands in acknowledgement that she had heard him. “This is nice.” It was nice, she thought contentedly, to just stand like this together, quiet and comfortable together. At times their mutual passion had threatened to consume her. She was afraid sometimes that they would burn up and there would be nothing left of them. Then there were other times, like this, when they inhabited a little oasis of peace.

  The children were bundled up in coats and hoodies, playing their games and running back and forth, shrill voices raised. A few adults lounged on park benches, some of them engaged in casual conversation. Their lack of activity was a counterpoint to the exuberant youngsters.

  “I wonder where they get their energy,” she remarked. It was such a long time since she had watched kids playing. She had forgotten that it was normal for children to run and jump and scream with laughter. A pang of infinite regret gripped her heart. She had left Chloe comfortably settled with Vicky to watch over her until she got home, but she would have given anything in the world if Chloe could have been on that playground instead. It went without saying that Vicky would have none of the problems associated with an over-active child. She’d even settle for being told, when she walked in the door, that her daughter had torn up the apartment or refused to go to bed on time.

  “I see some fathers over there. That’s good.” Michael’s voice rumbled in his chest behind her.

  “Yes,” she agreed. She shifted in his embrace so that she could turn her head and look up at him. She was surprised by the somber expression on his face, and suddenly she wondered about his childhood and upbringing. “Was your father around for you?”

  He shrugged. It was an easy lift of his shoulders. “Oh, yeah. He did the whole Little League and Boy Scout thing with me. He died of a heart attack a few years back.” A smile tugged at his lips. “He was a great guy. I was lucky to have him. Some kids aren’t that lucky.”

  “You’re right. You were lucky.” Winter turned back around and leaned against him. Her ex-husband was only her daughter’s biological father. He had steadfastly refused to have any other role in Chloe’s life. He had even refused to try to help save her life. Cathy didn’t know whether she could ever forgive him for that.

  There must have been some telling inflection in her voice because Michael’s arms tightened around her ribcage. “You’re thinking about your ex.”

  “Yes.” Winter was surprised by his perception, just for a moment, but then she wondered why she should be. She had never considered Michael to be stupid. He was intelligent and passionate and engaged in his life and career. Of course he was aware of what was going on around him and with other people.

  “Ironic. I was just thinking about a business associate. He has a family member who is going through a tough time because the father of her child abandoned them both.”

  “I know exactly how they feel.” She tried to keep the bitterness out of her voice, but it was difficult. She sensed the shake of his head.

  “I just don’t get how someone could turn their back on a kid. Or hurt one, either.”

  * * * *

  Michael felt her turn completely around in his embrace and looked down. She wore such a brilliant smile that he blinked. She lifted a hand to curve her fingers warm against his jaw. “You’re a very nice man, Michael.”

  Michael was riveted by the tenderness in her clear hazel eyes and the softened look on her face. He was suddenly assaulted by unexpected emotions. Shame, deep shame, burrowed up through the layers of his cynicism. What was he doing? What the fuck was he doing with someone as decent as Winter Somerset? She should be spending her time and energy with someone who could give her love and security and a future, not wasting her time with someone like him. A man who paid for a companion and sex because he was too selfish and too wounded to share his life. Coldness pitted in his stomach.

  He loosened his arms from about her and eased back a step. He returned her smile and kept his voice casual. “Come on. You’re getting cold. I’ll walk you back so that you can head home.”

  Confusion clouded her expression. She searched his face. “Michael? Is there something wrong?”

  He shook his head, retaining his smile. He took her arm and turned with her to start back in the direction they had come. “Nothing’s wrong. I just have a few things left to do tonight for work. Are you okay with that?”

  “Of course I am! Sure. I just thought, assumed that—” She broke off, a tide of color rising in her face.

  Michael deliberately threw his arm over her shoulders in the comfortable way that he had developed with her. He shot a teasing grin down at her, even though he felt something that had very little to do with amusement and a whole lot to do with ugliness from the past. “I know what you thought. I’m glad you think about it. About us, I mean. And I know that we haven’t been together in awhile. But sometimes, I just want to enjoy your company without getting hot and heavy. Sometimes I’d rather be with you, like this, instead.”

  The faintest of smiles hovered over her mouth. She lowered her head, her hair swin
ging forward so that in the gathering dusk he couldn’t see her expression any longer. “That’s very nice.”

  Michael tightened his lips. The coldness in his gut intensified, and he silently swore. That was the second time this evening that she had referred to him as being “nice!” He was a cold, unfeeling bastard. Everyone knew that. Even his business partner and best friend knew it. Darryl Harriman had known him for years, so he had to know him better than just about anyone else. So why the hell was Winter going on about his being nice?

  Michael fumed silently all of the way back to the parked vehicles. He was careful, though, not to allow his body language to give Winter any reason to guess anything was out of whack. He didn’t want to have to deflect questions that pried into his thoughts or emotions. Emotions weren’t to be trusted. He had learned that the hard way.

  Michael kept his pace leisurely, when what he wanted to do was to stride quickly up the trail, leaving her behind. It was an effort to keep his muscles relaxed so that the contact of his arm over her shoulders was companionable. She tipped her head to rest on his shoulder as they walked, snuggling trustingly against his side. He gritted his teeth. For the second time since he had met her, Michael wanted to physically withdraw from her. But he didn’t, not until they reached the Lexus, when he gently extricated himself. Against his own volition, he brought up his folded knuckles to brush across one of her soft cheeks. “Goodnight, Winter.”

  She was smiling again. Suddenly she swayed into him, catching him off guard, and pressed a swift kiss against his unsmiling mouth. Then she turned and got into the Lexus. He stood watching her drive out of sight before he slammed his palm against the top of his car. His hand smarted, but he ignored it. His thoughts spun furiously. He was going to have to break it off with Winter, after all. He didn’t want to do it. But to square it with his own unexpected surge of conscience, he was going to have to let her go. You stupid son of a bitch!