Single Dad's Kissmas

by Mika West

  I gave in, of course. I mean, it was Ryan. I was a sucker for him. “Okay, anything but Home Alone.”

  “Die Hard it is then,” I replied with a smile and started to dig out the well-worn DVD.

  “You do know Die Hard isn’t a Christmas movie right?”

  “Pfft, of course it is…”

  She rolled her eyes but smiled, no doubt remembering our past arguments on the very subject.

  “Make yourself comfortable. I’ll be right back.”

  He had coffee; I had wine. The alcohol was need on my part because having feelings for an emotionally unavailable man, who was now a single-dad, was stressing. While the movie played in the background, we caught up, talked about his time in New York, about the job that made him wealthy and able to stay at home with the girls.

  “So, you stay at home, design computer software and make a load of money?”

  “Pretty much,” he shrugged.

  “That’s awesome. I’m proud of you, Ryan. Back in high school, you were a popular jock, but I was the only one who knew that deep down you were a computer nerd.”

  He threw his head back and let out a roar. “Hey, careful with who you’re calling a nerd. I’m a geek! But thanks for keeping my secret. Football was just to pass the time in high school.”

  “High school, those were the days, huh?” I got up and announced, “I need more wine.”

  Ryan’s eyes flickered to the empty bottle resting on the coffee table. “Don’t you have work in the morning? You should go easy…”

  My nose wrinkled. “You sound like Eric. I’m fine. It’s not like I’m driving home.” I felt myself swaying as I walked. Footsteps sounded behind me.

  “No more wine, Lucy. You’re cut off.”

  “Bossy much.”

  We neared the dining table where a pile of papers littered the surface. Shoot! There were late bills, the word overdue stamped in a large, angry red font on them. And more letters from a loan agency demanding payment. All were things that I didn’t want Ryan seeing. I scrambled to pack up the mail, sending a few envelopes scattering to the floor. When he bent to pick them up, I dove after them. If not for Ryan catching me, I might have broken my neck.

  He steadied me. “Jesus, Lucy. What’s the matter with you? Are you trying to kill yourself?”

  “I uh...” his hands still on my hip, sent me into a stupor. Plus, the alcohol had my brain muddled.

  His peered over my shoulders at the stack of mail. “Hiding something?”

  “No.” I managed to push the fallen envelopes under the table with my foot.

  “You’re a terrible liar, Lucy. Always have been.”

  I inched away, and his hands fell from my hips. Immediately I felt bereft. I walked into the kitchen, to the sink. “I’m not lying about anything.” Strong hands grasped my shoulders turning me around.

  “You want to know how I know your lying?” He leaned closer, his face mere centimeters from mine.

  “How?” the word emerged as a breathy whisper. Ryan's proximity was causing a severe mental and physical malfunction in the best possible way. His natural male scent left me intoxicated, and I swayed toward him.

  “Your cheeks turn a pretty shade of pink; you pull your bottom lip between your teeth and nibble. But most importantly you can’t look me in the eyes, just like now. So fess up, Liar,” he murmured.

  His eyes twinkled with amusement when my mouth opened and closed. I’m sure he saw the guilt that flickered across my face because he chuckled. Suddenly, his amusement turned something else, but I wasn’t sure what at first.

  His eyes darkened, swirled with flecks of silver. They were mesmerizing, pulled me in. Then he covered the slight distance, and I gasped just before his mouth covered mine.

  I could have sworn I felt the earth shift, but that could have been my body quaking with surprise, elation, and lust all at the same time. He stilled for a second and my heart dropped, thinking he would stop, but he didn’t.

  His lips moved slowly, coaxingly and my lips parted in invitation, allowing his tongue to slide in. He tasted heavenly, like coffee and... Ryan. My arms wound around his neck, crushing my breasts against his heart and chest. The pressure of his kiss gradually increased until it became ravenous. I kissed him back with fervor, our tongues clashed. He lifted me, took me by surprise. I sat on the counter, and he moved closer, stepped between my thighs, which I widened to accommodate him.

  It was like we were both lost in a haze of desire. I wondered if Ryan even realized what he was doing. The Ryan I knew would never touch me the way he was. I had dreamed of his kiss, his touch since I was old enough to know what went on between a man and woman, so, I pushed all thoughts aside and focused solely on Ryan, his lips on mine, his hands sliding under my tank top. I shivered at the feel of his hands on my bare skin. They brushed my breasts, and I moaned, briefly wondering if was dreaming. Quite possibly, I was caught up in another one of my fantasies. But how good it felt!

  I pulled in a sharp breath when he slid one hand down, into the waistband of my sweats. He stilled when he felt bare flesh. Ryan’s head whipped up, and I fought not to protest the loss of his lips.

  “No panties,” he growled. “Jesus, Lucy.” His nostrils flared and my cheeks heated.

  With a shrug, I murmured. “Sometimes I go without.”

  His groan was guttural, almost animalistic. He moved so swiftly; I squealed wrapping my legs around his waist as he strode back to the living room. We stayed intertwined as he sat down. My top flew over my head, leaving me bare for him to feast on.

  His mouth latched on to a nipple to suck, sending shards of pleasure through me. My back arched and my head fell back as I reveled in his delicious assault on my body, my senses. He moved to lavish attention on the other breast. My moans and sighs filled the living room. I wanted him to make love to me right there on my couch. I ached for more, yet, I wanted him to go slow, give every inch of me the attention I had craved for the longest.

  As if he could read my thoughts, he shifted, laying me on my back. Ryan hovered over me, looked into my eyes before he captured my mouth again. When his hand slid down, disappearing below the waistband of my sweats once again, I prayed he wouldn’t stop.

  He caressed my mound, teased me with his fingers until I was panting. Finally, his finger flicked my sensitive bud, nearly sending me through the roof.

  I gasped his name as he feathered kisses along my neck and circled my clitoris. I wondered if should I tell him I’d never gotten that far with any man. A twenty-seven-year-old virgin. He would probably laugh. But, it’s his fault that I haven’t lost my virginity. I compared every man to him since I was old enough to date and no one ever measured up.

  All thoughts of my virginity fled when Ryan slid a finger between my slit. I gasped, moaned, then let out a cry when he added another digit and began to stroke, at the same time, finding my mouth. His tongue moved in and out the same way his fingers moved between my legs. My fingernails dug into his shoulders as pleasure threatened to consume me.

  “God, Luce, you’re so tight and wet,” he whispered against my lips.

  My hips moved in response, back and forth, attempting to get more. I could feel the tension building in my core, my toes tingled, my body on fire. Oh, my God. Ryan was about to give my first orgasm, not achieved by masturbating.

  “Mmm, Ryan, please,” I begged, trembling beneath him. One more thrust of his fingers and my cry bounced off the walls. My orgasm rushed through me with such intensity I was robbed of breath. His name spilled from my lips over and over until I descended back to earth.

  “Make love to me, Ryan, right here, right now.”

  My eyes flickered open and my pleasure quickly dissipated. Instead of the adoring look I wanted to see, he stared at me with alarm. His hand was still down my pants, and I was topless, so my discomfort grew. Could things be any more awkward?

  “Ryan, are you o—”

  “What the hell am I doing?” He jumped up as if burned and backed aw
ay.

  Embarrassment nearly swallowed me whole. My face burned as I searched for my top. It was just my luck that I couldn’t find it. I glanced up to see Ryan holding it.

  “Here just... put it on.” My humiliation knew no bound. I grabbed it from him and did as he wished. “Lucy, I’m so sorry.”

  I couldn’t respond. Moments away from having all my dreams come true only for them to be shattered.

  “I didn’t come here for that, I swear. I shouldn’t have touched you. You’re not... I don’t know what came over me. I should go.”

  He backed to the door as if I had a contagious disease. Fighting back tears of shame, I was silent until the door slammed shut.

  Ryan

  Three days. Three miserable days passed without me hearing from or seeing Lucy. Maxi asked for her nonstop, and I thought about her constantly. That night at her place was stuck on replay in my head. How could I kiss her, touch her like that? I was never supposed to give in to the attraction I felt for her. Ever. She was off limits. Eric would kill me if he knew I crossed the line with Lucy. And I would be picking him up from the airport that day. I wondered if I could face him. I knew all I was going to think about was Lucy moaning in my ear as she came apart, her soft body pressed against mine, how tight her—

  “Uncle Ryan, are you sick?”

  I blinked, glancing at Maxi. Inquisitive brown eyes were trained on me. I looked at Becky, whose face was plastered with crushed vegetables. Even she looked at me in askance. “Uh, no. Why?”

  “You’ve been making funny noises all day. Does your tummy hurt?”

  My mouth twitched. Every time I thought about Lucy, a groan would escape. “Don’t worry Maxi; I’m not sick. I’ve just been thinking too much.” Way too much.

  “Do you need a vacation from work?”

  I chuckled. “Maybe I do. Would you like that if I took one soon?”

  She nodded and smiled, then went back to eating her sandwich. After a few chews, she broke the silence again. “How come Lucy hasn’t come over? I miss her. And her pancakes.”

  “Ucy!” Becky squealed, unable to pronounce the L, and clapped her tiny hands.

  My heart sank. Because I screwed up, kid. “Lucy has been busy with work.”

  “Do you think if we help her with work, she’ll have time to come over to play? We should go and help her cook, uncle Ryan.”

  The innocence of children. “It’s not that easy, sweetheart.”

  “When you see her can you tell her we miss her?”

  “I sure will, Maxi.” That was if I could face her.

  “How’s life as a stay at home mom?”

  “Screw you, Eric.” I grinned.

  He let out a roar. “Sorry, I couldn’t help myself. How are the girls?”

  “They’re fine; alive. I just hope they survive me taking care of them. The babysitter has them for a few hours today.”

  “I’m sure you’re doing great.”

  “That’s what Lucy said.”

  Eric glanced at me. “You two talk often?”

  I shifted uncomfortably, and my hands tightened on the steering wheel. “Well, she’s been helping out. She stopped by last week to finalize the catering plans for the wedding, not knowing it was called off.”

  Eric winced. “Shit, I forgot to mention it to her. That must’ve been awkward. Sorry, bud.”

  I shrugged. “Doesn’t matter now. Anyway, she saw my need for help and started coming over to cook and help me with the girls.”

  “That’s Lucy for you. She’s a sweetheart.”

  “Yeah. And the girls love her too.” I hoped we would get off the subject of Lucy.

  “How have you been, man?”

  “Okay.”

  “I mean with everything that happened with Julie, your sister...”

  “I’m handling everything, one day at a time. I haven’t thought of Julie much to be honest.” Maybe because I was busy thinking about Lucy.

  “Because you didn’t really love her.”

  I took my eyes off the road for a second to throw him a glare. “What? Of course, I did! I asked her to marry me!”

  Eric shook his head. “N-uh. You loved the idea of Julie. You met her in the big city, had a whirlwind romance. She’s hot as hell, has legs for days—”

  “Down boy. “

  Eric chuckled. “Anyway, even I could tell there was no deep emotional connection between you two. You asked her to marry you because you thought that was what she wanted, that it was the next step, you know? It was what she wanted, to sink her hooks into a wealthy man. And after Beth died, you rushed things, even more, seeking comfort.”

  I scowled. “Why didn’t you share your observation sooner, Doctor Phil?”

  “I tried, but you were so lost in grief, you didn’t hear me. Then you got the girls, and I thought maybe you needed Julie to help, and things would work out. I honestly, thought all of you would be one big happy family.”

  I snorted. “Too bad Julie turned out to hate kids.”

  Eric shrugged. “Cheer up; you dodged a bullet with that one. I don’t think she really loved you either.”

  I couldn’t refute that now that I thought about it properly.

  “So, how are your parents?” I asked, changing the subject.

  “Great. Living it up in the sunshine. Mom’s been complaining about not seeing you and Lucy. You know how much she adores you. You and Lucy had better get your asses to Florida soon, take a trip together or something, with Maxi and Becky. Mom would love that.”

  I cocked a brow, wondering if Eric, or his parents for that matter, would be so keen on the idea of Lucy and me traveling or doing anything together if they knew I’ve been lusting after her since she’d turned eighteen. I cleared my throat.

  “Maybe… We’ll see.”

  We fell into easy chatter about topics other than Lucy and my failed relationship, thank God. Thirty minutes later we reached Eric’s condo. “Thanks for the lift, man.”

  “No problem, see you later?”

  “I’ll stop by your place tomorrow and come see the girls. Lucy and I are having dinner tonight to catch up.”

  The mere mention of her name made my heart beat a little faster. It had to be guilt.

  “Cool. Enjoy.”

  I had a few hours to spare after collecting Eric from the airport them running some errands. For some reason, after I’d dropped him off, I found myself on Lucy’s block.

  I was surprised to see her outside in the freezing cold. She was peering under the hood of her delivery van. It was comical, the way she gazed with confusion and then scratched her head. I quietly got out of the car and went to surprise her.

  “You’re a chef and a mechanic? I had no idea.”

  She yelped and banged her head on the raised bonnet as she spun around. A string of expletives that shocked me spewed from her lips. It was so out of character for her my mouth fell open.

  “I’m having a bad day,” she explained with a blush. “What are you doing here, Ryan?” Her voice turned icy.

  I had no idea and shrugged. “I haven’t seen you in a few days.”

  “Well, duh,” she muttered.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  She threw her hands up. “What did you expect after... what we did and your look of horror afterward. I mean, was I that bad? You ran out of my house as if the hounds of hell were on your ass. I know, things only went that far because you’re still trying to get over Julie and felt stressed and everything, but I was hurt, Ryan. I didn’t think you wanted to see me and I sure didn’t want to see you.”

  I was speechless. All I could say was, “Luce, I’m sorry.”

  She huffed, obviously not believing me.

  “Julie was nowhere in my thoughts when I kissed you, trust me. I just felt it was inappropriate for us to go any further. I came to my senses… We’re friends.”

  Crystal blue eyes still filled with hurt settled on me. “Came to your senses? I see… Friends. Of course. Whatever. Apolo
gy accepted. Now, if you don’t mind I’d like to get back to,” she said and waved her hand over the engine compartment, “all of this very confusing stuff.”

  Clearly, I was dismissed, but I couldn't make my feet move to leave. I sighed. “What are you doing?”

  “You still here?” She rolled her eyes then let out of breath when she realized I wasn’t going anywhere. “The oil light has been flashing, I Googled DIY oil change, and I’m trying to locate the oil thingy.”

  I swallowed my smile. “The oil filter?”

  “Yes, that.”

  “That’s why mechanics exist, Lucy. Go to one.”

  “I can’t— I mean, I don’t have time. I have a delivery to make this afternoon. Eric is probably jet lagged. I don’t want to bother him.” She sighed. “I’m sure I can do it if I just follow the instructions.”

  “Go inside. You don’t even have a coat on.”

  “Don’t come here and order me around.”

  “Just go inside, you’re teeth are chattering. I’ll do it.”

  “You will?”

  I nodded.

  Relief relaxed her features, and she blew into her hands. “Thanks,” she muttered.

  “No problem.” If only she knew I would do anything for her since we were kids and up to that day. I watched her walk toward the house as I took off my coat and rolled up sleeves.

  “Hey, Luce.” She looked back. “Maxi and Becky miss you.” And I do too. “We’d all like it if you visited.”

  She smiled. “Maybe I will.”

  Lucy

  “You’ve been spending a lot of time with Ryan,” Charlie commented. She carefully set the cake I had finished decorating not too long ago into a box. “I thought you two weren’t an item.”

  “Of course I spend a lot of time with him. He’s a friend. I help out with his nieces. We're not together.”

  “Sure. That’s the only reason.”

  “Sarcasm doesn’t become you, Charlotte.”

  She laughed at my use of her full name. I used it when I was annoyed. “He’s nice. I knew his sister; she was pretty cool. I didn’t even know she had a brother.”