MB08 - I’ll Be Your Sweetheart

by Joan Jonker

  ‘That is an idea that could be worked on, Nellie,’ Corker said. ‘Good thinking.’

  ‘Oh, I told yer I had two ways in me head of how to do this, so listen to the other. It starts with me hearing the knock and opening the door. There’s nobody there, and I’m just going to close the door when I happen to look down and see the box on the bottom step. I look in the street, but apart from two young kids playing the street’s empty. I didn’t know what was in the box, and I was in two minds whether to give it to the kids to play with, or take it in the house. Well, I took it in, didn’t I, and the rest is easy.’

  Corker was nodding his head and stroking his beard. ‘Nellie, me darlin’, I think yer’ve solved the problem with the second tale. If the kids were only toddlers, the police could hardly question them. And I think it would work.’

  Jack sighed. ‘I’ve got to say it would grieve me to see the thugs getting off with it, but I’ll go along with whatever yer think is best. I haven’t contributed, so I’m not in a position to stick my two pennyworth in now. Let the professionals decide.’

  Molly had been dithering, but the more she thought of how easy Nellie had made it sound, the more she was drawn to the idea. In fact, she found herself adding her own ideas. ‘A family that lives opposite Flora have a couple of toddlers, only eleven months between them. And the mother lets them play in the street just to keep them from under her feet. So there’s no lies being told there. And me and Nellie could walk Flora to the police station and tell them the tale. Flora would be too nervous to say very much, so I’d do the talking. Not that I’m a particularly good liar, but I’d do it for the old lady.’

  ‘If there’s any lies to be told, girl, then I’m the one to do it.’ Nellie’s chins agreed with her emphatically on that. ‘Ye’re a bloody awful liar, you are. Yer eyes blink fifteen to the dozen and yer go the colour of beetroot. Left on yer own to do it, the three of us would end up in a cell. Mind you, they don’t make a bad cup of tea down at the nick.’

  ‘Give it some thought, first, ladies. Don’t do anything hasty,’ Corker advised. ‘Sleep on it. If yer have any qualms in the morning, then drop the idea and we’ll think of another way. But could I see the watch now? I didn’t have time when they handed it over. I’d asked for an extra hour at dinnertime and didn’t want to take advantage of my boss’s good nature. So I only lifted the lid off the box to make sure the watch and chain were in it, then I hot-footed it to here.’

  Molly left her chair to take the box from the sideboard drawer, placed it in the centre of the table, then took her seat again.

  All eyes were on the box but nobody reached out a hand to touch it. Each one was waiting for another to make the first move.

  Nellie’s impatience surfaced with a shake of her head and clicking of tongue on teeth. ‘In the name of all that’s holy, we’re sitting here like stuffed ducks.’ She lifted her bosom so she could stretch across the table for the box. ‘The ruddy thing is not going to bite yer.’ She picked the watch out of the box and then squealed with horror when the chain remained where it was. ‘Oh, my God, I’ve gone and broke the bleeding thing.’ The watch was quickly laid on the table and Nellie’s eyes turned to her friends. ‘I didn’t do nothing. It must have been broken when the buggers what stole it were messing with it.’

  ‘It’s not broken, Nellie,’ Corker said. ‘The watch fits on to the chain. Look, I’ll show you.’ Within seconds he had the watch attached and dangling from the chain. And all four people present, although they were not to know, were thinking of the young man whom it was bought for, who had died fighting for his country.

  Molly was feeling very emotional as she thought of how happy Flora would be when she was reunited with the one thing in life that brought her husband close to her. ‘Corker, I don’t know if you know how to, but could you open the watch and see if there’s a photograph inside?’

  Considering Corker had such large hands, he handled the watch with great care. And when he opened up the back of it his eyes dwelled for several seconds on the photograph of the young man who appeared to be staring up at him. Then with a sigh that contained sadness he turned the watch towards Molly. ‘He was a handsome young man, and a brave one.’

  The tears rolled unchecked down Molly’s cheeks, and even Nellie was seen to run the back of her hand across her eyes. And although the two men didn’t shed any tears, the lumps in their throat were hard with emotion.

  Molly pulled herself together and sniffed a few times to swallow the tears. ‘If it makes me want to howl like a baby, what effect will it have on Flora?’

  ‘She’s bound to be affected emotionally,’ Jack said. ‘But it’ll only be for a short time. It’ll come as a shock at first, then she’ll be over the moon.’

  ‘We’ll be there with her,’ Nellie said, and her chins agreed. ‘She’ll be fine, you’ll see. We’ll all have a good cry, then she’ll be as right as rain.’

  ‘One thing that’s bothering me about the plan yer’ve come up with, Nellie, is the knock on the door. It’s the main ingredient if yer plan is to work, but who is going to knock?’

  Nellie looked blank, but not for long. ‘What are yer on about, Corker? What ruddy knock?’

  ‘You said there would be a knock on Flora’s door, and you would open it and find the box on the step. Who will have knocked on the door?’

  ‘Oh, don’t be worrying about that. I’ll think of something when the time comes. The knock will be the least of our worries. I mean, like, I can always pretend I heard a knock when there wasn’t one.’

  Corker chuckled. ‘Nellie, after this little escapade, I’ll believe anything yer tell me. Getting that wonderful watch and chain back from crooks would never have been possible without you and Molly. And yer friend in the corner shop, she was more than helpful.’

  ‘I’ll say she was,’ Molly said. ‘We were lucky we went in that shop. And once again it was Nellie’s brainy idea. So I’ll put me money on her. If she says she can get round the knock on the door, then I believe her.’

  Nellie was in her applecart with all the compliments. And she smiled when she heard a little voice in her head saying, ‘It’s that chair what does it, girl. Yer look dead important sitting in it.’

  ‘What are yer laughing at, sunshine?’ Molly asked. ‘Yer look like the cat that got the cream.’

  ‘I’m not laughing, girl, I’m just pleased we got Flora’s watch and chain back. Don’t forget she’s me adopted mother now, so it’s me duty to look after her.’

  ‘We’re all pleased about that, Nellie,’ Corker told her. ‘Apart from the memories it holds for her, it’s beautiful. Pure solid gold it is, and just to hold it is a pleasure. I know it’s not possible, but I’d love to see the old dear’s face when you give it to her.’

  ‘It would give the game away, and take too much explaining if we told her you were the one who got it back for her, Corker. It would mean telling lies, and getting her confused. Better stick to Nellie’s plan, that would make it much easier.’

  ‘Yes, yer’re right, Molly, we’ll leave it in the capable hands of the ladies from the Bennett and McDonough Detective Agency. But when all the fuss has calmed down, I might just walk round to Flora’s with me ma. Just a friendly visit, that’s all.’

  Molly put the watch and chain back in the box and closed the lid. ‘I’ll put it away in case Ruthie comes in.’

  ‘Me and Jack will be on our way for a pint now, then, ladies, if there’s nothing more to discuss. I’ll give a knock after work tomorrow to see if there’s been any development.’ Corker slapped Jack on the back. ‘Come on, lad, our pints await.’

  ‘One pint, Corker,’ Jack told him. ‘We’re hoping to have an early night.’ He was taking his coat off the hook, and Corker was opening the front door when they heard Nellie’s voice.

  ‘Is Jack on a promise tonight, then, girl?’

  Jack chuckled as he struggled into his coat, but Corker, with his fingers on the latch, dropped his head back and let out a loud guf
faw. And it was just dying down when Molly spoke.

  ‘Nellie McDonough, have yer no shame? Honest, there’s times when I wish the floor would swallow me up, I’m so embarrassed.’

  Jack pushed Corker out of the door and down the steps. ‘Yer heard what the wife said, and I don’t want to get the blame for her red face.’

  The following morning, Nellie was knocking on Molly’s door half an hour earlier than usual. She was expecting to be told off and sent back home until Molly had finished her housework. But Nellie was prepared to put up some strong resistance if that happened, for her nerves were as taut as a violin string. She’d hardly slept all night, her mind was too active, planning how best to go about giving Flora her watch back without arousing suspicion.

  When the door opened, Molly wasn’t given the chance of stopping her mate from coming in. She was pushed aside by Nellie’s hand, then flattened against the wall by a swaying hip. ‘Don’t bother waiting to be invited in, sunshine, just make yerself at home. Put yer feet up on the mantelpiece if yer like.’ Molly closed the front door and tutted her way into the living room, where Nellie was busy moving a dining chair to make space for the carver.

  ‘I don’t care if yer take off and call me all the names under the sun.’ Nellie plonked herself down with great determination, as though daring her mate to object. ‘I haven’t slept all night, and I don’t see why I should be doing all the worrying on me own. So just pretend it’s half an hour later than it is, and put the kettle on. Like yer would for our usual cuppa.’

  ‘I didn’t sleep very well meself, sunshine, so yer weren’t suffering on yer own. I’ll make a pot of tea, then we’ll sit and sort our thoughts out in a calm way. The more agitated we get, the less likelihood there is of us finding the right solution. Anyway, I’ll stick the kettle on.’

  Nellie waited until she heard the tap running in the kitchen before muttering, ‘That was a turn up for the book. I was expecting her to bite me head off. If I’d known she was going to be so pleasant, I’d have come earlier.’ She nodded her head at the aspidistra standing on the small table by the window. ‘I’d have tried me luck at half past seven, when the men had left for work. It would have saved me making me own breakfast.’

  ‘Some hope you’d have had, Nellie, at that time in the morning.’ Molly had poked her head round the door while she was waiting for the kettle to boil, and had heard the conversation her mate was having with herself. ‘I wouldn’t have been washed and dressed, and I’d have sent yer packing with a flea in yer ear. This is not a café down at Seaforth docks that opens at six o’clock for the dockers to have a breakfast before going in to work.’

  Nellie widened her eyes in surprise. ‘What are yer talking about, girl? I think yer must be still half asleep, rambling on about dockers and their breakfast.’ She swivelled her bottom round to face Molly. ‘We need a clear head this morning to plan our next move, so I think yer should swill yer face in cold water. That would wake yer up proper, and yer’d be alert.’

  ‘I’m as alert as I’ll ever be, sunshine; I had me cold swill an hour ago. There’s the kettle boiling now. I’ll make the tea. But a word of advice, Nellie. When I bring the cups in, don’t ask why there’s no custard creams on the saucer. Yer shouldn’t need to ask, seeing as yer scoffed the lot yesterday.’

  ‘Blimey, girl, don’t be getting yer knickers in a twist because I pinched a few biscuits. There were only four, at the most.’

  ‘Yes, I know that, sunshine, but they were my four biscuits, not yours. It would have been nice to have had the opportunity of eating them meself.’

  ‘But ye’re not that fussy on biscuits. Ye’re always saying yer can take them or leave them.’

  ‘Two good words there, Nellie! Take and leave. You had no right to take them because they didn’t belong to yer. Yer should leave things where they are when ye’re in someone else’s house.’

  ‘What a bloody palaver, Molly Bennett. While we should be discussing a very serious situation, all you can think about is rotten biscuits! It’s a wonder the ruddy things didn’t choke me. In fact, come to think about it, it was probably them what kept me awake all night.’

  ‘It would serve yer jolly well right,’ Molly said. ‘They do say thieves get paid back for stealing, and perhaps a sleepless night was your punishment.’

  ‘Now the lecture is over, girl, can we talk about some thieves that appear to be getting off scot-free?’

  ‘Wait until I bring the cups in. I think better when I’ve got a cup of tea in me hand.’

  Nellie had her chin resting on a hand when Molly came back, and she told her mate, ‘I’ve gone over and over it in me mind, girl, and I’ve thought of another way to get the watch back to Flora without too many questions being asked. Will yer listen while I tell yer, and see what yer think?’

  ‘Go ahead, sunshine, I’m all ears.’

  Nellie clamped her lips together to stop her thoughts putting themselves into words, the words being, ‘All ears and no biscuits.’ The little woman thought they were funny, but wasn’t going to take a chance on her mate agreeing. ‘It’s the same as the ones I told yer about last night, right up to the time the knock comes on the door. But instead of me taking the box in to Flora, I was wondering if it would be best to take it along to the police station. I could tell them how we came to have it, and that we hadn’t told Flora because we thought they should be the ones to give it to her.’

  ‘That’s a bit complicated, isn’t it?’ Molly looked confused. ‘Why go to the police first? Surely the obvious thing to do would be to give the watch to the person it belonged to. That would make more sense.’

  ‘You might be right, girl, but think about it first. We still stick with the story about the knock on the door and that, but say we decided we should ask the police for advice. And if the inspector came with us to hand the watch over, after making sure it was the one what was stolen, then the whole street would know. It would all be out in the open, girl, all above board. Corker would be happy, you and me would be happy, and Flora wouldn’t have to know anything, except being so happy to have part of her husband back with her. And the police would be able to close the case.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know, Nellie, the police would ask a lot of questions. They’re not stupid.’

  ‘I never said they were, girl, but somewhere along the line they’ve got to be told Flora has got her watch back. If we ask her to keep it quiet she’d think there was something fishy, and if we didn’t, she’d be so happy she’d be telling all the neighbours. And they’d want to know how it came about.’ Nellie put on her stubborn face. ‘If the police gave it back, no one would question how, when and who.’

  ‘I know why you want to go to the police, sunshine, ye’re not fooling me. It’s an afternoon in the cells you’re after, with a big handsome bobby bringing yer cups of tea.’

  ‘You’re only jealous, girl, ’cos you missed out on the excitement of sitting in a cell where a murderer might have parked his backside.’ Then Nellie’s eyes lit up, and she leaned her elbows on the table. ‘Ay, girl, Jack the Ripper might have sat on that very seat.’

  Molly didn’t think she should be chuckling, not when they had a serious job ahead of them. But the chuckle came and she couldn’t stop it. ‘It must have been some backside he had, sunshine. It never would have fitted on a seat on the twenty-two tram.’

  ‘How can yer say that, girl, when yer didn’t even know him? He might have had a little bottom for all you know.’

  ‘Nellie, if Jack the Ripper sat in that cell, he must have had the biggest bottom imaginable. Yer see, he didn’t live in Liverpool, he lived in London.’

  Nellie’s tummy saw the joke before she did, and the table bounced up and down. ‘Ay, that was a good one, Molly. And it’ll give me something to talk to the inspector about. Get pally with him, like, so he won’t notice we’re lying our bleeding heads off.’

  ‘I won’t be lying me head off, sunshine, ’cos you said you’d do all the talking. And I’m quite
happy to take a back seat and let yer get on with it.’

  Nellie was delighted. ‘So yer think me last plan is a good one, girl? Ye’re happy to go along with it?’

  ‘I’ll go along to the police station with yer, but I’ll leave you to do all the talking. I’ll back yer up if the officer asks me for confirmation, I wouldn’t let yer down or leave yer swinging, sunshine. But what I absolutely refuse to do is share a prison cell with yer.’

  ‘It’s a pity about you now, Molly Bennett. We share everything else, so why isn’t a prison cell good enough for yer?’

  ‘We don’t share everything, sunshine, that’s quite a big statement to make. Name the things we share, and yer’ll find it’s not a very long list.’

  Nellie was so sure she was on safe ground she didn’t give herself time to think. ‘Well, we’re mates, so we share that. And we go to the shops together, that’s another thing. Then we’re grandmother to both baby Bobby and baby Molly.’ There was silence for a while as Nellie realized there weren’t many more things she could think of. After all, being best mates meant yer shared everything. But she was blowed if she could bring to mind anything in particular. That is until she lifted her teacup, and then her face lit up. ‘And we share our morning cup of tea every day.’

  Molly was shaking her head even before Nellie had finished speaking. ‘No, yer got that one wrong, sunshine. Yer were right with all the other things we share, but not the last one.’

  ‘Don’t be acting daft, girl. What’s the matter with yer? We’re sitting here sharing a cup of tea, and you’re trying to tell me I’m imagining it! Yer want to get a grip of yerself, girl, or yer’ll be going round the bend. Ye’re at a very difficult time in yer life, when old age is creeping up on yer.’