by Syndi Powell
“Sucks to be a mother, doesn’t it? I tried to warn you.”
She hung up the phone before her mother could launch into her usual tirade. Her heart hurt for the pain Ruby was going through. What would it be like to lose a loving mother and then be denied by her absent father? Actually, Page had a good idea of how she felt.
Page knew what it was like to pin your hopes on a dad who turned his back on you. She could remember her heart shredding as he blocked the door to his house and told her he couldn’t have a daughter like her living with his perfect new family. She’d been replaced so easily, and it had made her chest ache. To this day, she hadn’t spoken to her father since that day as a teenager.
She’d longed to find a place that she could fit in. It wasn’t in either of her parents’ homes, so she’d focused on her studies and found a job in a hospital, where people were happy to see her as she helped out wherever she could. She’d admired the nurses she’d met and had set her sights on a similar path. And then she’d married Chad, thinking she’d finally found her real family. But then he’d left her.
She could empathize with Ruby, had been in her shoes, longing for a family that didn’t seem to exist. But where would the girl go? Where would she find peace? “I know where she is.”
April immediately opened the door to Zach’s car. “I’ll drive.”
Page shouted out directions as April steered them toward the public library. Page was out of the car and running for the building before April had pulled the car to a full stop.
“Ruby!” Page hollered. She had to be here. She’d mentioned spending hours among the stacks before she had to go back out onto the streets when the library closed for the night. And this was where she had gone to her support-group meetings. It was a place of comfort and acceptance. It made sense that she’d come here. “Ruby!”
She ran up the concrete steps and wrenched open the door. She rushed through the second set of doors and scanned the large main room, hoping to catch sight of the teenager. Discouraged, she walked to the reference desk. “Have you seen a pregnant teenager? Her name is Ruby. I’m her friend. Her foster parent.”
The librarian shook her head, and Page thanked her before scanning up and down the stacks looking for Ruby. She left the fiction section and ran into April by the reference texts. “Any sign? I was sure she’d be here.”
She took the stairs to the second floor and checked the meeting rooms. No Ruby.
Page returned to the main floor and spotted April.
“We’ll keep looking,” her friend insisted.
“Okay. Let me visit the restroom before we go back to the pizzeria.”
Page continued to look around as she made her way to the women’s room, located at the rear of the library. When she pushed open the door, she gasped. Ruby sat on the floor in a puddle of blood. She looked up at Page. “Something’s wrong,” she said.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
RUBY WAS WEDGED in the front seat of Zach’s sports car between the two women as April raced to the hospital. Page wiped the girl’s sweaty forehead with wet paper towels she’d taken from the restroom. Realizing that people were still searching for Ruby, Page put the girl’s hand on the wet towel on top of her forehead. “Hold this while I call Mateo to let him know we found you.”
The girl nodded as Page removed her cell phone from her pocket and punched in his number. When he answered, she took a deep breath, hoping that her voice would stay calm. The last thing Ruby needed was to become more worried. “We found her.”
“Thank goodness. Where was she?”
“Doesn’t matter. We’re heading to the hospital, so please thank everyone and send them home. I’ll call later.”
“Wait. Is something wrong?”
She glanced over at Ruby. “I’ll text you.”
“Okay. Take care of our girl.”
She agreed and texted him what was happening with Ruby. She resumed wiping Ruby’s brow with the paper towels. Ruby stared up at her. “Who was looking for me?”
“Mateo. Zach. Sherri. Dez. Sherri’s parents. Zach’s grandparents. Some of Mateo’s friends.” She tried to smile. “We were all worried about you.”
“Why?”
“Because we care about you. You’re special to us.”
Ruby’s face crumpled and she cried out, clutching her belly. Page looked straight ahead. “Can you drive any faster?”
“I’m trying.” April’s tight grip on the steering wheel was making her knuckles white. “Hang in there, Ruby,” April encouraged.
Within minutes, they were at Detroit General and April hopped out and started barking orders to the ER staff, while Page eased Ruby out of the back seat and into a wheelchair.
Page followed behind Kenny, the ER doctor on duty. “She’s fourteen and seven months pregnant. She’s had a lot of blood loss so we’ll need to get a transfusion started. She’s been complaining of pains in her belly all day, but I thought it was just nerves.”
He nodded as she gave him every detail she could remember. When they got to the trauma room, Ruby disappeared behind a curtain. Page stood on the other side until April walked up behind her and pushed her toward it. “Go. She needs you.”
She found the team working quickly to help Ruby. She skirted by them and came to stand near Ruby’s head. She pushed the damp hair out of the girl’s face and placed a kiss on her forehead. “It’s going to be okay.”
Ruby moaned. “It hurts so bad.”
“It will get better.”
“What about the baby?” Ruby asked.
Page met the doctor’s eyes. He gave a quick shake of his head, and she took a deep breath. It seemed that the baby wasn’t going to make it. She knew that it had likely been the case when she’d seen the amount of blood, but the confirmation made her heart break. The doctor’s efforts had to now be focused on saving Ruby. “Let’s worry about you first, okay?”
“But the baby... Your baby...”
She kissed the girl’s forehead again, hoping that Ruby didn’t see the tears in her eyes. “It’s okay. But we’re going to need you to push.”
Ruby kept shaking her head and moaning. “No. It’s too soon.”
Page moved around so that she could look Ruby in the eye. “Listen to me. It’s time. We need to work quickly and save you, okay?”
The girl started to cry. “Page, I can’t.”
“Yes, you can.” She put her hand on Ruby’s. “I’m not leaving you, okay? We’ll do this together. Now take a deep breath like me.” Ruby mimicked her, and they did it several more times.
The doctor moved the girl’s feet into the stirrups and helped her scoot farther down the table. “Push now, Ruby.” The girl grasped Page’s hand in hers and shouted as she bore down. “Good. Push again,” the doctor asked.
Page was desperate to help Ruby, but all she had were words. “You’re doing great, sweetie. Keep pushing.”
Ruby grunted with effort, and Page pressed a kiss against her forehead. The doctor nodded. “Good. One more time.”
Ruby laid back, and tears coursed down her cheeks. “I’m so sorry. It’s too soon.”
Page leaned over her and put a hand to her cheek. “There’s nothing to be sorry for, okay? But you need to give one more good push.”
“I can’t.”
“You have to. And I’m right here with you.” Ruby did so, but silence filled the room when it should have held mewling cries of a newborn. Page bit her lip and struggled to keep her composure for Ruby’s sake.
The doctor placed the baby into the nurse’s care. Page helped Ruby lie back down as the staff hurried to clean her up. She kissed the girl’s forehead. “You did real good.”
Ruby tried to get back up on her elbows. “What about the baby? Why isn’t he crying?”
Page let the tears she’d held back fall down her cheeks. “The baby didn’
t make it, sweetie.”
“I lost the baby?” She started to sob, and Page held her in her arms, rocking her back and forth.
After a few minutes, the room started to clear of staff, and the doctor approached them. “Would you like to see her?”
It had been a girl. Page looked at Ruby, who nodded. “Yes, please.”
He brought over the tiny baby, wrapped in a pink blanket, and placed her in Ruby’s arms. Ruby moved the blanket away from the baby’s face. “She was beautiful.”
Page smiled at the sweet, tiny face. “She looks like you.”
“I guess she does.” Ruby leaned forward and placed a kiss on the baby’s lips. “She was too beautiful for this world, I guess. Do you want to hold her?”
Page wiped at the tears on her face and nodded. She accepted the tiny bundle that weighed a couple of pounds, if that. She caressed the small cheek and pressed a kiss on the baby’s forehead, which sported a fine dusting of dark hair. She was perfect and so still. “Do you think we should name her?”
“She was going to be your baby. What do you think?”
Page couldn’t think of anything at the moment. The grief that pierced her heart made thought impossible. This might have been her daughter. In mere seconds, she imagined the life of this baby. Infant, toddler, child, adult fully grown, having an amazing future. But she’d never taken a breath. Page sagged on the bed beside Ruby and put her head against the baby’s body and wept.
* * *
MATEO ENTERED THE emergency room and searched for Page, but didn’t see her. He did see April and ran toward her. “How is Ruby?”
“She’s losing the baby.”
He took a step back and looked up at the ceiling, praying silently for both Ruby and Page. “What about Page?”
“I’m sure she’s devastated. She really wanted that baby.”
“I know.” He gave April a hug. “Zach’s on his way.”
“Thanks.”
It was hard for him to believe this had happened. Everything seemed fine only minutes ago and now this. How would it affect them all, especially Ruby? It might take a long while to deal with how this would affect them all. Ruby had become a big part of their lives. They all loved her and would now grieve with her.
The doors to the ER opened, and Zach rushed to his wife. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her as she cried. Dez and Sherri held hands. Mateo glanced around the room. Everyone seemed to have someone but him.
He could have someone, though. He could be putting his arms around her and comforting her right that moment if he wasn’t so scared to open his heart to her. He walked up to the ER receptionist. “Is there a way to get word to Page Kosinski?”
The woman looked warily up at him. “She’s a bit busy right now.”
“I know, but I want to make sure she understands she’s not alone. That we’re all here for her.”
Page came from around the corner. “You can tell me yourself.”
She looked horrible and beautiful at the same time. Tears had reddened her eyes and cheeks, and it seemed that she hadn’t finished crying yet. He pulled her into his arms. “I’m sorry,” he whispered into her ear. “How’s Ruby?”
“She’s...okay. They’re going to keep her overnight, so I’m staying with her.”
He continued to hold her, but her arms stayed at her sides. When he let her go, she didn’t look at him. “I need to tell everyone.”
“I can do that.”
“No, it’s all right. It feels like my responsibility.” She walked into the waiting room. April and Sherri sped to her side. They all had their arms around each other, crying. He watched them for a moment, then got permission to see Ruby.
In a private room now, Ruby was lying on the hospital bed, holding a blanket to her chest and rocking back and forth. She looked up at him. “I’m sorry, Mateo.”
What? He put a hand on her shoulder, wishing he could do more to ease her mind. “Why are you sorry?”
“I shouldn’t have run out of the restaurant. I shouldn’t have run away. Things might have turned out differently. I wouldn’t have let Page down then.”
He frowned, unsure of how to explain her error. “I’m sure Page doesn’t see it like that at all. None of us do.”
“Us?”
“The gang. Sherri, April and their husbands, the other nurses and staff here. People care about you, Ruby.”
“Not my dad, though. I don’t know whether to wish he was here or be glad he isn’t.” She wiped her eyes. “Do you need to do a DNA test, or something, to prove Thomas is my father?”
It seemed like years ago that they had been attempting to have dinner with Ruby’s dad. “I don’t think he’ll pursue custody, remember? Which gives us a couple of different options.”
“Like finding another relative who will take me?”
He nodded. “That’s one. Permanent foster care here, or in Oklahoma, is another. And then there’s Page.” He took a few steps forward. “What do you want, Ruby?”
Tears rolled down her cheeks as she stared at her lap. “What I want doesn’t seem to matter anymore.”
“Yes, it does. And I’m here to make sure I help you with whatever it is.”
He squeezed her shoulder as a nurse entered. “We’re going to check your vitals again, Ruby. Then you should try to get some rest.”
He stepped back, but kept his eyes on Ruby. “I’m really sorry, Ruby.”
She seemed to have aged a decade since he’d seen her earlier that evening. “It’s okay. You tried to find me a family.”
“I wish things could have turned out differently.”
Ruby nodded. “Me, too.”
“But you’re not alone, okay? You have us.”
Ruby held out her arm for the nurse.
“I’ll tell Page where you are,” he said and left the room.
He stood for a few minutes, collecting his thoughts, his emotions running wild. How he wanted to be of comfort to Ruby and Page. Page? He returned to the waiting room.
Page sat in one of the chairs, surrounded by her friends. He took a step forward. “They’ve moved her to her room now. Three forty-two.”
Page gave a sad grin. “The children’s ward. Even though she’s no longer a child.”
Everyone started to give hugs and words of farewell. Eventually, Mateo stood alone with Page. “How are you doing?” he asked.
“I’m tired, and Ruby needs me.” She started to walk way, but stopped suddenly and turned to him. “You called her ‘our girl.’”
“I did?”
“When I called to tell you that we were on the way to the hospital, you said to take care of our girl.”
He tried to recall. “I guess I did.” He vaguely remembered that. But then he’d been so relieved she’d been found and then worried about her and the baby. “Ruby’s certainly found a way into our hearts, hasn’t she?”
Page nodded. “I can’t imagine a life without her now.”
She put her arms around herself, and tears fell down her cheeks. He rushed forward and pulled her into his arms again. This time, she hugged him back. “It was a girl. She was so tiny and so beautiful.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not fair.”
“I know.” He rubbed her back in slow circles. “None of this has been fair.”
Page took a step back and wiped her face. “I can’t see the future. What it all means.”
“Let’s focus on Ruby healing. The rest can wait. It’s too soon for some of those questions.”
He drew her to him once more and kissed her cheek. “Everything’s going to be okay.”
Again, she didn’t put her arms around him, but the hurt radiating from her was almost too much. Then she took a step backward. “I have to get back to Ruby.”
She left the waiting room, her hea
d and shoulders hunched forward as if she couldn’t stand straight with the weight on them.
* * *
SUN STREAMED INTO the hospital room when Page woke the next morning. She had fallen asleep in a chair beside Ruby’s bed, putting a crick into her neck and shoulders. She rolled her head from side to side as she rubbed her sore neck.
Ruby still slept. Once things had calmed down and they’d had a chance to discuss it, Page had made arrangements for the baby’s body to be cremated. Ruby figured she would do something thoughtful with the ashes once she was healed. Healed physically, at least. Page wasn’t sure how long the emotional pain would last.
Ignoring the ache in her own chest, she stood and approached Ruby’s bed. She put the back of her hand against the girl’s forehead. A little warm, but nothing to be worried about. The girl’s eyes fluttered, and she opened them and looked up at Page. “You’re here.”
“I told you I wouldn’t leave. How are you feeling?”
The girl shrugged. “Okay, I guess.” She winced against the sun that shone through the window and held up a hand to block out its rays. “Can we pull the curtain?”
Page complied. She longed for darkness as well. A dark room and her bed, where she could pull the sheets over her head and forget the last twenty-four hours. “Dr. Achatz said you can come home today.”
“What home?”
Page frowned. “Mine, of course. Unless you don’t want to live with me anymore.”
“I don’t care.” Ruby pulled the sheet over her shoulder and turned on to her side away from Page.
She tried not to take it personally given what they’d both been through the night before. The girl was allowed to hurt. Maybe she too wanted to pull the covers over her head and forget.
The door opened and an orderly dropped off a food tray. “Breakfast.”
“No thanks,” Ruby mumbled and burrowed farther under the blankets.
Page nodded her thanks to the orderly. She pushed the table away from the bed. “I don’t blame you. The food here isn’t bad, but then it’s not that good, either.”
“Can we not talk?”