Morgan, Nicole - Love Knows No Boundaries (Siren Publishing Allure)

by Love Knows No Boundaries (lit)

  “What’s wrong, Isabelle? You were so quiet last night. Is everything all right?”

  The genuine concern she saw on his face was making her feel that much worse. How could she tell this sweet man that she thought she loved him but she had been wrong?

  She tried a reassuring smile. “Justin, I’m sorry. I’m fine.” Give him some sort of an explanation. “I’m just not feeling very well.”

  He closed his eyes and walked away from her. He shut her bedroom door and turned to her.

  “Isabelle. I think I know what’s going on here.”

  Oh no.

  “You do?”

  “I’m afraid so.” He came to her again and placed his hands gently on her shoulders. “I know the last few times that we’ve come close to making love I’ve pushed you a little too far.”

  “Justin I—”

  “No, please let me finish.” He waited for her to nod in agreement before continuing. “I can’t help the way you make me feel. But I do apologize for trying to rush you. I have no excuse. But please know this: I love you.” He looked up to the ceiling and smiled. “God, how I love you. But I will wait as long as it takes for you to be ready. No matter how frustrated I get, I promise it won’t happen until the time is right.” He smiled at her. “So please don’t feel that you need to be nervous or act as though you might be getting ill. I won’t pressure you. I promise.” He hugged her to his body. “I know how important it is for things to be absolutely perfect when you’re finally with a man for the first time.”

  What? He thinks—oh God. I am a horrible person.

  “Justin, I—”

  “No, honey. It’s okay. I know you haven’t told me, but I figured it out. I know that’s why you’ve held back so much. Your first time is a big deal. I understand that. And I love the fact that you’ve waited and that your first time will be with me.” He kissed her again, only now with more passion.

  Isabelle pulled away from the kiss and made another attempt at a smile.

  “Justin. I can’t tell you how much your words mean to me. But I truly am not feeling well. Maybe I’m coming down with something.”

  Justin’s pre-med instinct took over.

  “Oh, Isabelle, I’m sorry. Do you have a fever?”

  “No. I just have a horrible migraine. That’s all.” He was watching her so closely she involuntarily elaborated on her lie. “And I’m maybe a little achy.”

  Justin nodded.

  “The flu. I heard on the news last night that it was making its way around town.”

  “Maybe,” she shrugged.

  There was a knock on the door.

  “Come in,” Isabelle instructed.

  “Oh, hello Justin. Terrance is ready when you are,” Connie said with a bright smile on her face.

  “Are you going somewhere?” Isabelle asked him.

  “I still have shopping to do for a special someone. You know how we men hate to shop. So we figured we’d stick together.” He kissed her cheek and walked toward the door. “Try lying down for a while. See if that helps.”

  She smiled and nodded before he left the room.

  “Okay, have fun.”

  “Is something wrong? Do you not feel well?” Connie asked.

  “Just a little achy with a headache. I’ll be fine.”

  “Okay, if you’re sure. Well listen, Sean’s on the phone waiting to talk to you.” Connie’s voice was riddled with concern.

  “Mom, what is it?”

  “Is everything all right dear? I mean, Sean, he’s changed in the past year or so and, well, I guess I just don’t want him taking his aggression out on you.”

  So she wasn’t the only one that noticed Sean was different. Her mother saw it too.

  “No, it’s fine. I’ll pick up the call. Thank you.”

  Isabelle waited for her mother to leave the room before she picked up the phone. A moment later she heard her mother hang up the other receiver downstairs.

  “Sean?”

  “Did you dream about me last night, Izzy?” He was doing that thing with his voice again. Goosebumps ran along her skin at the sound of it.

  “Sean. Oh, Sean, I’m so glad you called. I need to talk to you. I need to see you and explain that—”

  “We’ll talk soon, baby. Listen, I already told my dad that I couldn’t attend that party tonight because I had to work. I want you to find a way out of it too.”

  She listened to his request and knew there was no way she could deny him anything. But didn’t know how she could get out of it. “Sean, I don’t know if—.”

  “Stop it, Izzy.” His curt tone surprised her. “You will find a way out of it. Then I’m coming over. Do you understand?”

  His voice. What was it about his voice that seemed so dark?

  “Yes, Sean. I understand.”

  “Good. Then I’ll expect you to be there waiting for me. There are things we need to clear up. Things we need to talk about. Things that we need to make right with one another. Don’t disappoint me, Izzy.”

  The deep voice and the words that flowed from it were causing sensations in her as if he were here, touching her.

  “I won’t disappoint you, Sean.”

  “Izzy?”

  “Yes?”

  “Tell me,” he demanded.

  “Tell you what?”

  “Damn it, Izzy, you know what I mean. It’s been too long since I’ve heard it. Tell me that you love me.” He sounded angry again.

  “Oh, Sean.” She did. She loved him so much it was killing her. “I love you.”

  He sighed.

  “That’s my girl. I’ll see you later, baby.” He hung up.

  Isabelle placed the phone back on its cradle and felt confused by the emotions churning inside her. He had managed to excite her and scare her all at the same time. What had happened to Sean to change him so drastically?

  “Are you sure you can’t come?” Connie asked from the bottom of the stairs.

  “I’m sure. I’m sorry, but I just feel horrible.” She was such a liar. She felt a lot of things right now. But “horrible” was not the word that she would use to describe any of them.

  The idea of Sean coming over for their long-awaited discussion was consuming her mind.

  Justin stood at the bottom of the stairs with Connie and Terrance, dressed to the nines in a dark suit.

  “I still feel like I should stay with you.”

  Isabelle shook her head.

  “No, really. I want you to go and have a good time. The people there are great. I’m just going to take a hot bath and go to bed early.” Hopefully with Sean. She knew that she was an awful person for wishing that.

  “If you’re sure. We’ll only be a couple of blocks away. If you need anything at all call my cell okay?”

  “I promise. Now go. I’m going to get into the bath.” She watched as they left and she heard the click of the lock after they got outside. She waited. Once she heard the car drive away she started her bath. She wanted to feel clean and feminine when Sean got there.

  * * * *

  Sean had been waiting down the street to make sure that everyone left for the party, minus Izzy. His knuckles tightened against the steering wheel as he saw Justin. Why hadn’t she gotten rid of him yet? He had been certain that he had made himself clear the day before when he took her on her dresser. He should be gone already. What was she thinking keeping that pipsqueak around and meeting with him too? She had to know that after tonight they would be together.

  Obviously his little Izzy had changed. Did she think she could keep her pretty boy pre-med boyfriend and have Sean on the side? He didn’t think so. He would have to show her just exactly who she belonged to.

  * * * *

  Isabelle had only been in the bath for five minutes when she looked up and stifled a scream as she saw Sean standing in the door way. She had turned down the lights and the room was only lit by candle lights. He had that look in his eyes again. What was he so angry about?

  “Sean. I did
n’t hear you come in.” Her words were shaky and nervous from the way his eyes looked.

  “Get out,” he demanded.

  “Sean, what’s wrong?”

  “Now!” he shouted at her. Damn this woman. How dare she look so damn beautiful in that tub while his rage was boiling just below the surface?

  She jerked back as if his words had slapped her clear across her face. She hesitated only a second before she stood in the tub. She got out and looked at him.

  He watched her. Bubbles were dripping from her swollen breasts. Her body was wet and shimmered in the candle light. He wanted to fight with her, to argue, but seeing her like that broke every amount of resolve that he had left.

  “Get on the bed,” he ordered her, pointing to the mattress.

  “Sean, I’m all wet. I can’t—”

  “I said get on the bed.” He gritted his teeth as he annunciated every word.

  She tried to swallow the combination of fear and excitement but she couldn’t decide which emotion was stronger. She walked to the bed and lay down, completely aware that she was soaking the blankets and sheets beneath her. She looked up at him.

  He looked at her.

  “Uh-uh. Turn over.”

  Her eyes widened in shock at his demand.

  “What?”

  “You heard me, turn over.”

  She swallowed the lump in her throat and turned over. She lay on her stomach, unsure of how she felt about it.

  “Lift your bottom. Get on your knees and lift your perfectly round bottom up to me.” He was undoing his pants as he gave the orders.

  What? Oh god. She didn’t know if she should or could do it. She could hear the anger in his voice. Sense the fury inside him. But she couldn’t refuse him. She loved him so much; she would just have to trust him. So she did as he asked. Suddenly aware of just how vulnerable she was.

  “That’s my girl. Spread your legs. There just like that.” He nudged himself against her and continued, “I have to tell you, Izzy. I’m very upset with you.”

  She turned her head to see him and saw their reflection in the mirror. He turned too and looked at her eyes in the mirror. For the first time with Sean she was actually afraid.

  “Sean, why? What did I do?”

  He laughed at her almost mockingly. Then he suddenly stopped and gritted his teeth.

  “I told you that you were mine. I told you I wanted that little shit Justin gone. Imagine my surprise, Izzy, when I saw him leave the house tonight dressed for the party.”

  Isabelle shook her head and tried to fight the fear clawing its way out of her.

  “No, Sean, you don’t understand. I haven’t found a way to tell him yet. It’s Christmas in two days. I feel horrible about having to hurt him.”

  “Nice try, Izzy. Meanwhile you get two for the price of one, huh?” he said disgustedly.

  “What? Sean, I don’t know what you mean.”

  “Oh, so innocent. Did you think I would be okay with sharing you with him? You’re mine, damn it. Don’t you think it disgusts me to know that you let him touch you?” he screamed at her as he stayed positioned at the ready. “Don’t you think I’ve been living in agony with out you all of this time? Damn you for destroying me.” He thrust into her hard and without mercy.

  Isabelle screamed, from pleasure or pain she wasn’t sure. He hadn’t hurt her body, but his words had sliced through her heart. She began to weep as he thrust into her. She wanted to explain. She wanted to tell him how wrong he was. But she couldn’t find the words. She was choking on the heartache while overwhelmed with the glorious sensation of him being inside of her.

  “Don’t you do that! Don’t you freaking cry while I’m inside you, damn it!”

  “Sean, please. Stop!” Her cries were coming too fast for her to control.

  Sean stilled himself. He was still inside of her, but he heard her plea. His heart broke when he realized what he was doing to her. “Rough” and “violent” were the only words to describe how he was taking her. He looked at her in the mirror and saw the tears streaking down her face.

  He stopped what he was doing and got up and off of the bed.

  “Jesus. Oh shit. Oh God, Izzy.” Sean was cursing himself and pacing the floor.

  Isabelle watched him. She had rolled to her back and had pulled the blanket up over her.

  “Sean?” she said between sobs.

  He turned to face her.

  “Izzy. Baby. I’m so sorry. I have no excuse for what I just did to you.”

  “Why?” she asked, barely able to get the words out. “Why are you so angry with me? What did I do wrong?”

  He sat on the bed next to her. What was happening to him? He had turned into an animal at the thought of Justin touching her.

  “I’m sorry. It doesn’t matter why I did it. Just know that I know I was wrong. Oh God, Izzy, I don’t want to hurt you. Ever.” He touched his hand to her face and was surprised when she didn’t pull away. “Will you let me hold you?”

  She didn’t say anything. But she went to him. She snuggled against him and sobbed, her tears spilling against his chest.

  “Izzy, oh God, baby. I’m so sorry. I was wrong. Please believe that I know that.” He felt tears sting his eyes. “But why, Izzy? Why is he still here? The thought of him touching you is–.”

  Isabelle placed her fingers to his mouth.

  “He’s never touched me, Sean. Never. Not like you have.”

  He let the words sink in, hoping he was hearing her correctly. Could she be telling the truth?

  “But your birth control pills.”

  She hung her head down.

  “Those pills are not what you think. I’ve been dating Justin for seven months now. He has been very patient with me. I thought that I might love him, so I decided that soon I would finally let him.” She quieted when she felt the rigid tension in his body. “But, I wasn’t in love with him. I was fooling myself. I didn’t even realize it until I walked into the living room yesterday and saw you. My heart ached when I saw you. You’re the one I’m in love with. Still in love with. The one that I’ll always be in love with. You are why I couldn’t let him have me. Because you were right, Sean. I am yours. Always yours.”

  His body relaxed and his eyes closed at the sound of her voice telling him everything he wanted and needed to hear. “I’m so sorry for what I did, for how I—I’m sorry. Izzy, I was dying thinking that he had touched you, that you let him have you. ”

  “Never. That’s why I was so worried about the condom. I hadn’t even started the pills yet. I just got them three days ago,” she said as she caressed his cheek.

  His eyes snapped back to hers at that.

  “You mean—oh, Izzy, I’m sorry. I wouldn’t have done that if I thought you weren’t protected.”

  “It’s okay, Sean. If I got pregnant with your child I would be overjoyed.” She kissed him.

  “What about school? If you got pregnant, it would stand in your way.”

  “Sean, school is important. But school is not you,” she said as she kissed him again.

  “Izzy, ah baby. I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve your love. You’re so good, so sweet.” He was melting for her. This was his woman. She belonged to him and she hadn’t let any one else touch her. “I’m so sorry for how I just treated you. That isn’t what I wanted. It isn’t what I planned.”

  She nodded.

  “I know. Sean, I need you to tell me what happened. I know you were upset about Justin. But you seem, I don’t know, it seems like you’ve changed.”

  Sean looked away from her, not sure how to respond to such a loaded question.

  “Izzy. I have changed, and not for the better.” He turned to face her again. “I became bitter and angry. I hated my life, or the lack of it. I hated waking up in the morning. I hated—oh god, for a while I hated you.”

  Tears welled in her eyes at his confession.

  “You—you hated me?”

  Sean took his hands to frame her delicate
face.

  “I was being unfair, selfish and I blamed you for my pain.”

  She shook her head, trying to understand what he meant.

  “Your pain? I don’t understand.”

  Sean took a steadying breath and closed his eyes. He had caused them both so much hurt. How did he tell her that it was all for nothing? That he shouldn’t have wasted over a year of their lives, time that they could have had together.

  “Izzy, I love you.” His heart warmed at the way her face lit up when he said it. “I have loved you this whole time.” He held up his fingers to her lips to stop her from interrupting him. He needed to get this out. He needed to atone for his mistakes. “I think I’ll just start at the beginning. Can you be patient with me while I try and get it all out?”

  She nodded at him, still stunned to hear that he loved her. She had been waiting to hear those words for years now.

  “That night, at your prom, when you kissed me. Oh, Izzy, I swear my heart almost exploded with emotion that night. That kiss did something to me that I hadn’t ever experienced before.” He shook his head at the memory. “I tried to ignore it. I tried to tell myself that it wasn’t real. That’s why I avoided you that whole summer. But then,” he sighed. “Then you came to my house that night and—God, you have no idea how hard it was for me to turn you away.”

  Needing to touch, him she reached her hands up and twined them behind his neck.

  “I knew it. I told myself that you felt something.”

  He smirked.

  “You were right, baby. God, you were tenacious. It took every ounce of strength I had to push you away. But I did because I thought that was the right thing to do.” He shook his head. “Then you came to say goodbye to me. Izzy, you have no idea how much it hurt me to hear you say goodbye. To consider the possibility that you would find someone else. I knew then that I couldn’t let you leave.”

  “I didn’t, I stayed. I stayed and it was wonderful.” She hated the tormented look in his eyes.

  “Yes. But then your mother called and I freaked. I kept thinking of your age and our parents and I was sure that I had taken advantage of you.”