Burn Me Anthology

by Shantel Tessier

Oh hell no! We're not canceling these plans. I will make this work. I will get her and Randy on track to walking down that freaking isle. I am getting to go on a bachelorette weekend vacation to party with my best friend! This is happening whether Mags and Randy like it or not.

  That's what a best friend is for, right?!

  Safe Burn

  By S. Moose

  Editing by Karen Hrdlicka

  Chapter 1

  Brennan

  This night’s been a clusterfuck of shit I don’t ever want to see again. It’ll be etched into my memory for as long as I live. The scene plays like a movie reel in my head. There’s no ending. It’s continuous and slowly breaks me.

  Innocent lives. Young girls are no longer here with us. My fists clench at my sides and I take a few calming breaths and remind myself my crew and I did everything we could.

  I’ve been through and seen a lot in my career, but never anything like this. The smell of death lingers in the air. News crews are everywhere with their cameras and reporters. Many have been on the scene from the beginning. Breaking news hit the air and several families rushed over, asking questions, and hoping to find their daughters.

  The cries from family members over the ones they’ve lost are overwhelming. Then there are the cries from family members because their daughters are still missing. To the families who are still looking, I connect them with the police chief and his officers.

  The stench of burning rubble invades my senses. I blink once. Twice. Three times. Then look around me.

  Twelve girls were in a burning building and only three survived. Two girls were immediately transported to the hospital. Their bodies—fuck—all those burns. I’m praying they’ll make it through. I have faith in the doctors and medical team. They’ll work their asses off to get the girls to live. Damn.

  I’ve seen a lot of shit during my career as a firefighter, but nothing like this. The cries are overpowering the area. Some of the guys are comforting the families, while the others are hiding in the dark, holding in their own emotions. In front of us is something you’d see on television. It’s not real life. Fuck, it doesn’t feel like real life. The screams ramble in my head and I try my best to shake them off. Tonight’s going to haunt me. In the three years I’ve been a firefighter, I’ve seen loss, but shit, nothing like this. Not with innocent young lives taken away. Fucking gone. Their families are left without any answers. Nothing.

  Being a firefighter is a rewarding job. I love what I do. During situations like this, fuck, I hate it. This shit eats away at you, and I’m sure Cap’s going to make us go through therapy to make sure our heads are on right. It’s a good and smart move. When you’re standing in front of a fire, you don’t have time to think. If you pause for a moment, it could mean the difference between saving someone and not being able to rescue them. You need to have a clear head and focus on what’s important—saving lives. Saving the ones who are trapped inside. Shit, you force through the fear and do everything you can to save them. You push and push, then most of the time, the only way you’re pulling out is when you have someone in your arms or someone from your crew is pulling you out.

  These girls were young. None of them looked to be over nineteen years old. It was a sad, messed up situation. They were all homeless and sought shelter in a crappy building. It was dangerous, but in the dead of winter, where else were they supposed to go? The shelters around town weren’t the greatest or safest. I feel for these girls and hope they’ll be okay. I feel for their families and pray for them. Pray they’ll find peace.

  Parents and siblings huddle with one another, praying, crying, begging for this night to be a nightmare. I watch husbands holding onto their wives. Siblings comforting their parents. Brothers holding in their pain and being the rock for their family.

  A promise to find the cause for this building burning gives hope to them. It’s all we can do right now. Give hope.

  From the corner of my eye, the one I saved, long blonde hair and hopelessly gorgeous blue eyes, turns her attention toward me from the EMT and gives me a small smile. She keeps her eyes on me, and I’m about to see how she’s doing until madness strikes.

  A stream of reporters rushes over to my captain, firing several questions and hoping to get more of the story to air. Suggestions of a possible arson or if there’s a serial killer on the loose are asked. I’m about to fucking rip their throats out. I hold in my anger and keep my expression stoic.

  Leeches.

  These suckers want one thing and one thing only—to give people a story. Well, here’s a story for you. Precious lives are gone. Parents will never get to hold their daughters again. Brothers and sisters will never see their sisters again. These girls didn’t think anyone loved them because of a misunderstanding or a situation that got out of hand.

  For a long moment, I think about where the girls are going to go and if there’s anything I can do. The memory of her hits and it drags my attention back to the girl I carried out. Something about this girl is captivating me. I’m not sure what it is or why I’m feeling this way. Her blue eyes find mine again, and instead of hopelessness, there’s fear and confusion. I step out of my daze and walk over to her in the ambulance. She turns away and keeps her eyes on the ground.

  “How is she?” I ask Dale, the EMT working on her.

  “She’ll be okay. Lucky, you got to her in time. We’re taking her to be observed and make sure. She’s having trouble breathing so we need to hurry.”

  Without thinking I tell him, “I’ll ride with you.”

  I hop inside the ambulance with Dale, and another EMT gets in the driver’s seat and starts the trip to the nearest hospital.

  “What’s your name?” I ask her.

  “Devan,” she stammers, her voice quiet and low. “Devan Infranti. Thank you for saving me and my friends. Do you know where they’re going?”

  “Devan Infranti. I like your name. It’s nice. I’m Brennan Hall.” I’m trying to do anything I can to avoid answering her question. Damn. Her clear blue eyes look at me, staring at me, and I do my best to keep my expression neutral. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

  “My friends.” Her voice goes soft. “I don’t have anyone else. I ran away from my foster family. Those girls are my family. They’re my sisters. Please tell me they’re okay.”

  Well, fuck. “It’s okay, Devan. You have me.”

  “Where are they taking my sisters?” Her helpless eyes burn into mine. She’s waiting for me to answer and I don’t know what to say. “You can be honest with me. I can handle it.”

  I gulp hard at the lump in my throat and flinch when she entwines her fingers with mine. I carefully tell her, “I’m here for you. Whatever you need.”

  “Since you’re not answering my question, then I think I know where they’re going. Thank you for trying to make this better.” She continues to stare at me, willing the answer from my unmovable lips.

  Once we get to the hospital, I sit beside Devan and watch her sleep. Her long blonde hair is spread on the blanket and she looks peaceful. I don’t want to leave and have her wake up alone. I make a few phone calls and find a better shelter for her. It’s nothing much, but it’ll do until she can find a job or something else. The shelter will let her stay for a while, and I’ll help her as much as I can.

  I lift my head from my phone and see eyes, wide with curiosity, looking at me.

  “How are you feeling?”

  “A lot better,” she mutters. “It hurts to move and breathe.”

  “I made some phone calls and got you into a pretty good shelter. It’s better than the ones around here, so you’ll be in good hands.” I take her hand in mine to comfort her. “I believe they’re going to transfer you to a room to keep you for a few days.”

  “I don’t have insurance. I don’t have money.” Her voice becomes frantic.

  I run my thumb over her hand to soothe her worries. “A social worker came by and I explained the situation. She’s going to look into having your stay
be covered by their charity fund.”

  “Thank you.” Devan entwines her fingers with mine. We stay like this for a few hours. Exhaustion hits me with full force, but I still don’t make a move to leave. Something’s keeping me here and I don’t want to question it.

  Devan finds sleep again. A doctor comes in and nods for me to meet her outside the room.

  “What’s up, Doc? How are the other two girls?”

  She sighs. “They didn’t make it. The burns were too much. She’s lucky to be alive. We’re keeping her overnight for sure and will reevaluate tomorrow. Once she’s discharged, does she have somewhere to go?”

  “I’m taking her to Hope Rose.”

  “Ah.” The doctor looks toward Devan’s room then to me. “I know this is not my place, and I do apologize, but Hope Rose won’t be able to give her what she needs. She needs more care and I know she’s homeless. Do you know if she has family?”

  “I’m not sure. On the ride over she said she doesn’t have anyone, so I’m sure she doesn’t. I can ask her again.”

  “Hmm. Okay.” She sighs again. “Well, Hope Rose it is.”

  An unfamiliar pang pierces my chest. Something about the way the doctor says Hope Rose isn’t sitting right with me. I must be going soft or something. Usually once I save someone, I head back to the station and get on with my life. Sometimes I’ll check with the captain for updates. I’ve never accompanied them to the hospital and waited.

  Shit.

  I run my hand over my face and turn to walk back into Devan’s room. An overwhelming primal need to look after her hits me. This isn’t something I’m used to. With the work I do, I don’t have time for a relationship or women. My life is all about being a firefighter and saving people.

  No one saved Iris.

  Chapter 2

  Brennan

  Devan had to stay in the hospital for two days. Since I’m on leave, I stayed with her and made sure she was okay and felt comfortable. I had my sister, Amber, help me shop for clothes for her. I wasn’t sure what she liked and I figured having Amber help was better than only me shopping.

  The ride to the shelter is quiet and I don’t push Devan to talk. She needs this moment to grieve. To think. To just be. The blanket remains over her shoulders and she’s looking out the window. She’s small in my large seat. Her eyes don’t leave the window as I continue to drive.

  Slowly, I place my hand on top of hers. I’m not sure why I’m feeling compelled to do this. All the emotions she’s experiencing, the grief, the sadness, the confusion, and the anger must be overwhelming. If I can take away some of her pain then I’ll do everything I can to do so.

  There’s an empty parking spot in front of the entrance. I cut the engine in my truck. My arm rests on top of my steering wheel and I turn to look at Devan. She sits up taller and stares straight ahead. I’m not sure what she’s thinking or how she’s feeling. The news of losing everyone in the building broke her.

  The reports of their deaths brought Devan to her knees. She wailed and cried, pleading with the doctors to do anything to bring back her family. I held her, rocked her, and whispered comforting words. Anything that’d help her, but my words weren’t helping her. She clung onto me, repeating, “This isn’t fair.”

  “Are you ready?” She nods and stays still in the seat.

  I help Devan out of the truck, put my arm around her, and sling the shopping bag over my shoulder.

  After being discharged, I brought her to the nearest store and bought her more clothes, toiletries, and some other essentials. She needed to eat and I wanted her to. Devan said she wanted sleep and wasn’t hungry.

  I didn’t push her.

  Before I raise my hand to knock on the door, it opens, and a petite gray-haired woman with glasses greets us.

  “Brennan?”

  “Yes, ma’am. I have Ms. Devan here for you. She’s okay, but needs a few days to rest. Will that be okay?”

  She nods. “Of course. Come inside and I’ll show you to her room.”

  My arm drapes down to the small of her back and we follow the woman up the creaky, wooden stairs. The pungent smell hits me and I look around to see the wallpaper peeling off the walls and pieces of the carpet torn in certain spots. This place is a dump. It’s not like I used to remember.

  “Ma’am?”

  “Call me Ms. Kelly, Brennan. And I know what you’re going to ask. The funding is limited. I’m trying the best I can. Who knows how much longer I can keep this shelter.” A defeated sigh leaves her lips and part of me feels her anguish.

  “I understand.”

  Ms. Kelly stands in front of a door, then opens it for us. We walk in and the smell is worse.

  “I tried having some cleaners come in, but this is the best I can give her. It’s not much and I’m sorry for the odor. The previous girl that was here, well, there was an incident. She won’t be back. Bless her soul.”

  Devan’s body stiffens. She steps closer to me and grips the hem of my shirt. Fuck. I can’t leave her here. I’ll worry too much and she needs someone to care for her. Even though she’s okay, there’s still some stress from the fire and knowing your friends are gone.

  “Ms. Kelly, I appreciate what you’re offering. I’m going to take Devan home with me. She needs more care and I don’t want to put the burden on you.”

  She gives me a small smile of understanding. “It’s been a while since you came around. Don’t be a stranger.”

  “Yes, ma’am. I’ll come back with the guys and we’ll help you patch up the shelter. Thank you again.”

  “Of course, dear. Have a good day, you two.”

  I get Devan into my truck and pull on her seat belt, before shutting the passenger door, circling around the front of my truck to climb in.

  “You don’t have to do this,” Devan quietly says without looking at me. “This is too much. I don’t want to cause you any problems. I shouldn’t even be here.” Her voice becomes small and trembles with each word that leaves her lips.

  “Hey.” I reach over and tip her head my way so we’re looking at one another. “I want to help you, okay? And don’t say that. You survived and that’s important.”

  “Are you going to expect anything…”

  I immediately stop her. “No. Nothing. I’m your friend and I’m going to make sure you’re safe. My sister lives next door and she loves to come around. She is one of the most social women I know, so you two will be friends. I live alone and I have an extra bedroom for you. There’s a bed, nightstand, and dresser. My fridge is always stocked, thanks to Amber, and I rarely drink and don’t do drugs. My entertainment system is badass, and since I’m a movie junkie, I have anything from action to romance to comedy to cartoons. If you truly don’t want to come back with me, then I can take you back to Ms. Kelly. It’s up to you, Devan.”

  She takes a moment to think about what I’ve told her. It’s a lot to process, especially after everything she’s been through. Her eyes wander around the truck then out the window, ensuring to not look at me, and she slowly rubs a hand back and forth over her forearm, taking it all in. I can see the wheels in her head turning. She’s tossing around the idea of living with me for a little while or the shelter.

  “I’ll go with you as long as you have Beauty and the Beast.”

  “You’re in luck! I do have it.”

  “Please let me know if I overstay my welcome.”

  “Of course, and trust me, you won’t. I have some mandated time off, so I’ll be here for ten days before I go back to work. We’ll head to the mall tomorrow to get you more clothes and whatever else you need.”

  “Brennan…”

  “Please, Devan. Let me take care of you.”

  “You don’t even know me. Why do you want to take care of me? I don’t mean anything to you. If you’re trying to pull something, then please let me go. I’m not experienced or worthy of your help. It should’ve been me who died in that fire.”

  “Hey,” I softy say and take her hands into mine
. “You made it out. This is your second chance, and I think everything happens for a reason. I’m sorry about your friends, and the building where you were living. The most important thing is you survived. You’re here.”

  “But why me?”

  I shrug and let her question sink in. I don’t want to seem like a fucking creeper who wants in her panties. No. “When was the last time someone took care of you? How long have you been on the streets?”

  “Since I was seventeen.”

  “And how old are you?”

  “Nineteen.”

  Too fucking young, man. Too fucking young.

  “Two years. On your own. On the streets. You had to fend for yourself and didn’t know if you were going to get something to eat or drink the next day. No one took care of you, and no, if you’re thinking this is out of pity, it’s not. I saw what happened at the building. I can’t imagine what you went through.”

  Devan stays quiet. I’m not sure what’s going through her head. I can’t read her.

  “Devan, I won’t hurt you if that’s what you’re thinking.”

  She looks at me with trust in her eyes. “I know.”

  “Then what’s wrong?”

  She closes her eyes to my question and takes a few shuddering breaths before answering. “I’ve never had someone care about me.” Her shoulders sag with the weight of her words, and my heart breaks.

  “Well, now you do. How about breakfast before we head home?”

  Chapter 3

  Devan

  My eyes dart around his beautiful, ranch-style home, taking it all in, and feeling safe when my eyes land on his. His dark brown eyes are warm and inviting. I’m good at reading people and I can tell Brennan’s a decent man. He won’t hurt me while I’m living with him. He won’t expect me to do anything. For the first time in a while—I feel safe.

  Safe.

  That word holds so much more weight than it should. It’s been too long since I’ve felt this way.