1q84

by Haruki Murakami

The fact that they want to learn more means they don’t have any solid information.

  “Exactly. But we don’t have any solid information about them, either. We still don’t even know the reason they went to all the time and trouble to concoct a plan to murder Leader.”

  Either way, while we wait for their reply, we have to keep on searching for Aomame. Even if it means stepping on somebody’s tail.

  Buzzcut paused a moment, and then spoke. “We have a close-knit organization here. We can put a team together and get them out in the field in no time at all. We have a sense of purpose and high morale. People are literally willing to sacrifice themselves, if need be. But from a purely technical perspective, we’re nothing more than a band of amateurs. We haven’t had any specialized training. Compared with us, the other side are consummate professionals. They know what they’re doing, they take action calmly, and they never hesitate. They seem like real veterans. As you’re aware, Mr. Ushikawa was no slouch himself.”

  How exactly do you propose to continue the search?

  “At present I think it’s best to pursue the valuable lead that Mr. Ushikawa himself unearthed. Whatever it may be.”

  Meaning we don’t have any valuable leads of our own?

  “Correct,” Buzzcut admitted.

  No matter how dangerous it might become, and what sacrifices have to be made, we have to find and secure this woman Aomame. As quickly as possible.

  “Is this what the voice has directed us to do?” Buzzcut asked. “That we should secure Aomame as quickly as possible? By whatever means necessary?”

  His superior didn’t reply. Information beyond this was above Buzzcut’s pay grade. He was not one of the top brass, merely the head foot soldier. But Buzzcut knew that this was the final message given by them, most likely the final “voice” that the shrine maidens had heard.

  As Buzzcut paced in front of Ushikawa’s corpse in the freezing-cold room, a thought suddenly flashed through his head. He came to an abrupt halt, frowning, his brow knit, as he tried to grab hold of it. The moment he stopped pacing, Ponytail moved. A fraction. He let out a deep breath, and shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

  Koenji, Buzzcut thought. He frowned slightly, searching the dark depths of memory. Ever so cautiously, he pulled at a thin thread, tugging it toward him. Somebody else involved in this affair lives in Koenji. But who?

  He took a thick, crumpled memo pad out of his pocket and flipped through it. Tengo Kawana. His address was in Koenji, Suginami Ward. The same exact address, in fact, as the building in which Ushikawa died. Only the apartment numbers were different—the third floor and the first floor. Had Ushikawa been secretly watching Tengo’s movements? There was no doubt about it. The two of them living in the same building was too big a coincidence.

  But why, in this situation, did Ushikawa have to trace Tengo’s movements? Buzzcut hadn’t recalled Tengo’s address up till now because he was no longer concerned about him. Tengo was nothing more than a ghostwriter. There had been nothing else about him that they needed to know. Sakigake’s interest was now entirely focused on locating Aomame. Despite this, Ushikawa had focused all his attention on the cram school instructor, setting up an elaborate stakeout. And losing his own life in the bargain. Why?

  Buzzcut couldn’t figure it out. Ushikawa clearly had some sort of lead. He must have thought that sticking close to Tengo would lead him to Aomame—which is why he went to the trouble of securing that apartment, setting up a camera on a tripod, and observing Tengo, probably for some time. But what connection could there be between Tengo and Aomame?

  Without a word, Buzzcut left the room, went into the room next door—which was heated—and made a phone call to Tokyo, to a unit in a condo in Sakuragaoka in Shibuya. He ordered one of his subordinates to immediately go back to Ushikawa’s apartment in Koenji and keep watch over Tengo’s movements. Tengo is a large man, with short hair, so you can’t miss him, he instructed him. If he leaves the building, the two of you are to tail him, but make sure he doesn’t spot you. Don’t let him out of your sight. Find out where he’s going. At all costs, you’ve got to keep him under surveillance. We’ll join you as soon as we can.

  Buzzcut went back to the room that held Ushikawa’s body and told Ponytail they would be leaving right away for Tokyo. Ponytail gave a slight nod. He didn’t ask for an explanation. He grasped what was asked of him and leapt into action. After they left the room, Buzzcut locked it so that no outsiders would have access. They went out of the building and chose, from a line of ten cars, a black Nissan Gloria. They got in, and Ponytail turned the key, already in the ignition, and started the engine. As per their rules, the car’s gas tank was full. Ponytail would drive, as usual. The license plates for the Gloria sedan were legal, the registration clean, so even if they exceeded the speed limit a bit, it wouldn’t be a problem.

  They had been on the highway for a while by the time it occurred to Buzzcut that he hadn’t gotten permission from his superiors to go back to Tokyo. This could come back to haunt him, but it was too late now. There wasn’t a moment to lose. He would have to explain the situation to them after he got to Tokyo. He frowned a bit. Sometimes the restrictions disgusted him. The number of rules increased, but never decreased. Still, he knew he couldn’t survive outside the system. He was no lone wolf. He was one cog among many, following orders from above.

  He switched on the radio and listened to the regular eight o’clock news. When the broadcast was done, Buzzcut turned off the radio, adjusted his seat, and took a short nap. When he woke up he felt hungry—How long has it been since I’ve had a decent meal? he wondered—but there was no time to stop at a rest area for a bite to eat. They were in too much of a hurry.

  By this time, however, Tengo had been reunited with Aomame on top of the slide in the park. Buzzcut and Ponytail had no idea where Tengo was headed. Above Tengo and Aomame, the two moons hung in the sky.

  Ushikawa’s body lay there in the frozen darkness. No one else was in the room. The lights were off, the door locked from the outside. Through the windows near the ceiling, pale moonlight shone in. But the angle made it impossible for Ushikawa to see the moon. So he couldn’t know if there was one moon, or two.

  There was no clock in the room, so it was unclear what time it was. Probably an hour or so had passed since Buzzcut and Ponytail had left. If someone else had been there, he would have seen Ushikawa’s mouth suddenly begin to move. He would have been frightened out of his wits. This was a terrifying, wholly unexpected event. Ushikawa had long since expired and his body was stiff as a board. Despite this, his mouth continued to tremble slightly. Then, with a dry sound, it opened wide.

  If someone had been there, he would no doubt have expected Ushikawa to say something. Some pearls of wisdom that only the dead could impart. Terrified, the person would have waited with bated breath. What secret could he be about to reveal?

  But no voice came out. What came out were not words, not a drawn-out breath, but six tiny people, each about two inches tall. Their little bodies were dressed in tiny clothes, and they trod over the greenish mossy tongue, clambering over the dirty, irregular teeth. One by one they emerged, like miners returning to the surface after a hard day’s labor. But unlike miners their clothes and faces were sparkling clean, not soiled at all. They were free of all dirt and wear.

  Six Little People came out of Ushikawa’s mouth and climbed down to the conference table, where each one shook himself and gradually grew bigger. When needed, they could adjust their size, but they never grew taller than a yard or shorter than an inch. When they grew to between twenty-four and twenty-eight inches tall, they stopped shaking and then, in order, descended from the table to the floor. The Little People’s faces had no expression. But they weren’t like masks. They had quite ordinary faces—smaller, but no different from yours or mine. It’s just that, at that moment, they felt no need for any expression.

  They seemed neither in a hurry nor too relaxed. They had exactly the right amoun
t of time for the work that they needed to do. That time was neither too long nor too short. Without any obvious signal, the six of them quietly sat down on the floor in a circle. It was a perfect little circle, precisely two yards in diameter.

  Wordlessly, one of them reached out and grabbed a single thin thread from the air. The thread was about six inches long, nearly a transparent white, almost creamy color. He placed the thread on the floor. The next person did exactly the same, the same color and thread length. The next three followed suit. Only the last one did something different. He stood up, left the circle, clambered back up on the conference table, reached out, and plucked one frizzy hair from Ushikawa’s misshapen head. The hair came out with a tiny snap. This was his substitute thread. With practiced hands the first of the Little People wove together those five air threads and the single hair from Ushikawa’s head.

  And thus the Little People made a new air chrysalis. No one talked now, or chanted out a rhythm. They silently pulled threads from the air, plucked hairs from Ushikawa’s head, and—in a set, smooth rhythm—briskly wove together an air chrysalis. Even in the freezing room their breath wasn’t white. If anyone else had been there to see it, he might have found this odd too. Or perhaps he wouldn’t have even noticed, given all the other surprising things going on.

  No matter how intently the Little People worked (and they never stopped), completing an air chrysalis in one night was out of the question. It would take at least three days. But they didn’t appear to be rushing. It would be another two days before Ushikawa’s rigor mortis had passed and his body could be taken to the incinerator. They were well aware of this. If they got most of it done in two nights, that would be fine. They had enough time for what they needed to do. And they never got tired.

  Ushikawa lay on the table, bathed in pale moonlight. His mouth was wide open, as were his unclosable eyes, which were covered by thick cloth. In their final moment, those eyes had seen a house, and a tiny dog scampering about a small patch of lawn.

  And a part of his soul was about to change into an air chrysalis.

  CHAPTER 29

  Aomame

  I’LL NEVER LET GO OF YOUR HAND AGAIN

  “Tengo, open your eyes,” Aomame whispered. Tengo opened his eyes. Time began to flow again in the world.

  “There’s the moon,” Aomame said.

  Tengo raised his face and looked up at the sky. The clouds had parted and above the bare branches of the zelkova tree he could make out the moons. A large yellow moon and a smaller, misshapen green one. Maza and dohta. The glow colored the edges of the passing clouds, like a long skirt whose hem had been accidentally dipped in dye.

  Tengo turned now to look over at Aomame sitting beside him. She was no longer a skinny, undernourished ten-year-old girl, dressed in ill-fitting hand-me-downs, her hair crudely trimmed by her mother. There was little left of the girl she had been, yet Tengo knew her at a glance. This was clearly Aomame and no other. Her eyes, brimming with expression, were the same, even after twenty years. Strong, unclouded, clear eyes. Eyes that knew exactly what they longed for. Eyes that knew full well what they should see, and weren’t going to let anyone get in her way. And those eyes were looking right at him. Straight into his heart.

  Aomame had spent the last twenty years somewhere unknown to him. During that time, she had grown into a beautiful woman. Instantly and without reservation, Tengo absorbed all those places, and all that time, and they became a part of his own flesh and blood. They were his places now. His time.

  I should say something, Tengo thought, but no words would come. He moved his lips, just barely, searching for proper words in the air, but they were nowhere to be found. All that came out from between his lips were swirls of white breath, like a wandering solitary island. As she gazed into his eyes, Aomame gave a slight shake of her head, just once. Tengo understood what that meant. You don’t have to say a thing. She continued to hold his hand inside his pocket. She didn’t let go, not even for a moment.

  “We’re seeing the same thing,” Aomame said quietly as she gazed deep into his eyes. This was, at once, a question and a confirmation.

  “There are two moons,” Aomame said.

  Tengo nodded. There are two moons. He didn’t say this aloud. For some reason his voice wouldn’t come. He just thought it.

  Aomame closed her eyes. She curled up and pressed her cheek against his chest. Her ear was right above his heart. She was listening to his thoughts. “I needed to know this,” Aomame said. “That we’re in the same world, seeing the same things.”

  Tengo suddenly noticed that the whirling pillar rising up inside him had vanished. All that surrounded him now was a quiet winter night. There were lights on in a few of the windows in the apartment building across the way, hinting at people other than themselves alive in this world. This struck the two of them as exceedingly strange, even as somehow illogical—that other people could also exist, and be living their lives, in the same world.

  Tengo leaned over slightly and breathed in the fragrance of Aomame’s hair. Beautiful, straight hair. Her small, pink ears peeped out like shy little creatures.

  It was such a long time, Aomame thought.

  It was such a long time, Tengo thought too. At the same time, though, he noticed how the twenty years that had passed now held no substance. It had all passed by in an instant, and took but an instant to be filled in.

  Tengo took his hand out of his pocket and put it around her shoulder. Through his palm he could feel the wholeness of her body. He raised his face and looked up at the moons again. Through breaks in the clouds, the odd pair of moons was still bathing the earth in a strange mix of color. The clouds made their way leisurely across the sky. Under that light, Tengo once again keenly felt the mind’s ability to relativize time. Twenty years was a long time. But Tengo knew that if he were to meet Aomame in another twenty years, he would feel the same way he did now. Even if they were both over fifty, he would still feel the same mix of excitement and confusion in her presence. His heart would be filled with the same joy and certainty.

  Tengo kept these thoughts to himself, but he knew that Aomame was listening carefully to these unspoken words. Her little pink ear pressed against his chest. She was hearing everything that went on in his heart, like a person who can trace a map with his fingertip and conjure up vivid, living scenery.

  “I want to stay here forever and forget all about time,” Aomame said in a small voice. “But there’s something the two of us have to do.”

  We have to move on, Tengo thought.

  “That’s right, we have to move on,” Aomame said. “The sooner the better. We don’t have much time left. Though I can’t yet put into words where we’re going.”

  There’s no need for words, Tengo thought.

  “Don’t you want to know where we’re going?” Aomame asked.

  Tengo shook his head. The winds of reality had not extinguished the flame in his heart. There was nothing more significant.

  “We will never be apart,” Aomame said. “That’s more clear than anything. We will never let go of each other’s hand again.”

  A new cloud appeared and gradually swallowed up the moons. The shadow enveloping the world grew one shade deeper.

  “We have to hurry,” Aomame whispered. The two of them stood up on the slide. Once again their shadows became one. Like little children groping their way through a dark forest, they held on tightly to each other’s hand.

  “We’re going to leave the cat town,” Tengo said, speaking aloud for the first time. Aomame treasured this fresh, newborn voice.

  “The cat town?”

  “The town at the mercy of a deep loneliness during the day and, come night, of large cats. There’s a beautiful river running through it, and an old stone bridge spanning the river. But it’s not where we should stay.”

  We call this world by different names, Aomame thought. I call it the year 1Q84, while he calls it the cat town. But it all means the same thing. Aomame squeezed his hand
even tighter.

  “You’re right, we’re going to leave the cat town now. The two of us, together,” Aomame said. “Once we leave this town, day or night, we will never be apart.”

  As the two of them hurried out of the park, the pair of moons remained hidden behind the slowly moving clouds. The eyes of the moons were covered. And the boy and the girl, hand in hand, made their way out of the forest.

  CHAPTER 30

  Tengo

  IF I’M NOT MISTAKEN

  After they left the park, they walked out onto the main street and hailed a cab. Aomame told the driver to take them to Sangenjaya, via Route 246.

  For the first time, Tengo noticed what Aomame was wearing. She had on a light-colored spring coat, too thin for this cold time of year. The coat was belted in front. Underneath was a nicely tailored green suit. The skirt was short and tight. She had on stockings and lustrous high heels, and carried a black leather shoulder bag. The bag was bulging and looked heavy. She wasn’t wearing any gloves or a muffler, no rings or necklace or earrings, no hint of perfume. To Tengo, what she had on, and what she had omitted, looked entirely natural. He could think of nothing that needed to be added or removed.

  The taxi sped down Ring Road 7 toward Route 246. Traffic was flowing along unusually smoothly. For a long time after they got in the taxi, the two of them didn’t speak. The radio in the taxi was off, and the young driver was very quiet. All the two of them heard was the ceaseless, monotonous hum of tires. Aomame leaned against Tengo, still clutching his large hand. If she let go she might never find him again. Around them the night city flowed by like a phosphorescent tide.

  “There are several things I need to say to you,” Aomame said, after a while. “I don’t think I can explain everything before we arrive there. We don’t have that much time. But maybe if we had all the time in the world I still couldn’t explain it.”