Michael's Blood

by S S Bazinet

  Michael grinned. “Perhaps I’ve cured your empty nest syndrome. When you visit places with your heart, you’re reminded that you’re never alone.”

  Eighty-Six

  “NO, STOP, DON'T!” Kevin woke up shouting. His heart pounded as he tried to sit up. He couldn’t manage it. His legs wouldn’t move. He knew he had to do something, but he was helpless. Finally he opened his eyes and realized he was in a modern, living room, not some dismal, thatched hovel.

  Oh god, I was having that nightmare again! It’s the old man in the dream who’s paralyzed, not me.

  He blinked several times, trying to wake himself up completely. If he didn’t put distance between himself and the nightmare, he’d never escape the blanket of despair that accompanied the dream.

  Carol rushed into the room. “Kevin, are you okay? What’s wrong?”

  Kevin’s heart was still racing as he tried to move his legs again. The numbness was going away. “I’m fine,” he said in a hoarse whisper, relieved that he was telling Carol the truth, at least about his legs. He sat up as quickly as he could, gripping the sofa arm. “I woke you, didn’t I? Sorry about that.”

  She sat down next to him. “No, I woke up a few minutes ago. Your side of the bed was cold.” She smiled sweetly. “I missed you.”

  He rubbed his face, still fighting the remnants of the nightmare, still trying to break the spell of hopelessness that had grabbed hold. “I couldn’t sleep. I came out here to watch a little TV. I must have dozed off.”

  “Kevin, talk to me. Tell me what’s going on? Since we moved back to our own place, you don’t want to go to bed with me. And when you do, it’s only for a little while. Is there something wrong between us?”

  Carol sounded so unhappy. He wanted to take care of her. He wanted to be there for her, but what could he do? It wasn’t just that he was having nightmares. Even when he was awake, he felt like the old man from the dream was haunting him. If he couldn’t help himself, how could he help Carol? “What do you want me to say? I can’t sleep.”

  “I feel like you're pushing me away.”

  “I don’t want anything to happen to you or the baby, that’s all.”

  “The doctor said that I’m fine, that the baby is out of danger.”

  “That's good. So let's go back to bed.” He tried to be positive, but he couldn't keep his voice from sounding miserable. The nightmare kept flashing in and out.

  Carol stood up too. “Never mind. It’s clear that you feel like I’m a burden, a big problem that you don’t want to deal with.”

  “No, that’s not true. I love you.”

  Carol bit her lip as tears welled up and streaked down her cheeks. “Why don’t I feel like it?”

  “Don’t cry. I really do want to be with you. Let’s go back to bed, please. Let me hold you.”

  “You say it like you mean it, but when I look in your eyes, you seem so far away.” She put her hands on his chest. “What’s happening to you, to us?”

  “Nothing.” Carol’s touch was so gentle. How could he tell her that everything was falling apart inside of him? “I’m trying. You have to believe that.”

  * * * * *

  Carol lay in bed, wondering what Kevin wasn’t telling her. Since they’d left Arel’s house, he’d been acting so weird, so nervous and jumpy. Now he was holding her, just like he promised. But Kevin’s body felt tense. Earlier, when they were talking, his grey-blue eyes were awash in stormy seas. She wondered if their fragile boat of love would survive the tempest she could feel building inside of him. As she listened to him breathing, she sighed. “Kevin?”

  “Yeah?”

  “I’m here for you too. You know that, don’t you?”

  Kevin pulled her closer. “Of course I do. Now please, sweetie, get some rest.”

  “Only if you promise to do the same.”

  “I promise to try,” he answered in a despairing tone. “That’s the best I can do.”

  * * * * *

  Sitting in their usual spots on the patio, Fred and Grace talked about their favorite subject, how humans handled life and what angels could do to help.

  “People are curious,” Fred mused. “Kevin is so prone to doubting himself. I can’t seem to get through to him. He even shuts me out in the dream state when I try to advise him.”

  Grace gave him a gentle smile. “Kevin’s problems go way back many lifetimes. He was part of Arel’s group. He didn’t burn at the stake, but the part he played has left a mountain of guilt.”

  “Guilt, that’s a tough one. Kevin’s charted out quite a situation to confront it.”

  “Yes, he has. However, he does have a special ally. Arel has become quite the take-charge individual. Perhaps he’ll do something daring to help Kevin out.”

  “Perhaps.” Fred looked up at the stars, but he didn’t share certain information that he was privy to. He didn’t think the episode concerning Faine was something that Grace would appreciate.

  Grace glanced over at him. “Frederick, is there anything that I should know?”

  “Of course not. We both agree that Arel has been a true guiding light for both Carol and Kevin.”

  Grace sighed. “Just so he’s permanently over the vampire thing.”

  “Yes, of course.” Fred pondered the meaning of the word, vampire. He wondered if Arel’s ability to suction out and consume Faine’s negative energy counted.

  Eighty-Seven

  TIM CAME AWAKE with a start. He was sure that he’d heard Peggy cry out in her sleep. He blinked at the darkness and waited for a sign that he was right. A moment later, Peggy started to mumble again and shifted restlessly from side to side.

  Tim sat up and shook her shoulder. “Honey, what’s the matter?”

  Peggy let out a sleepy moan. “What?”

  Tim switched on the table lamp by the bed. “Honey, you must have had a bad dream. Are you alright?”

  Peggy squinted back. “I guess I was dreaming, but it wasn’t a regular dream. It felt more like when I was worried about Arel.”

  “Are you worried about him again?”

  “No, this time it’s about Kevin. Something’s wrong.”

  Tim looked at the clock. “It’s three in the morning. What do you want to do? Should I call him? Do you want me to go over there?”

  Peggy shut her eyes and moaned again. “I don’t know. Maybe it was nothing. I don’t want to keep being an interfering sister.”

  “Kevin’s going to be alright. You have to believe that. Look at Arel. You were worried about him. Now he’s fine.”

  “I guess you’re right. I keep forgetting that Kevin is a grown man.”

  Tim reached over and turned off the light. “No more dreams, and in the morning, I’ll call and check on him.”

  * * * * *

  Arel’s first thought was that the intercom was buzzing. “I’m coming,” he stammered, more asleep than awake. He started to push himself out of bed. He was getting used to obeying the buzzer without thinking. When he realized the phone was ringing instead, he eyed the caller ID and the clock. Why were Peggy and Tim calling so early? Was something wrong?

  “Hello?” His hand trembled slightly when he answered the phone.

  Tim’s voice was calm, but his message was an unwelcome one. Arel frowned as he asked a couple of questions. “What did you say? Kevin’s in the hospital?” As Tim responded, Arel was already out of bed and walking to his closet. “You’re going to see him? I’ll be dressed in five minutes. I’ll meet you outside.”

  After signing off with Tim, Arel grabbed for a shirt without thinking. His mind was busy digesting what he had to do.

  Damn, another trip to the hospital. What’s with these people?

  He was about to put on his shirt and stopped himself. How could he think such a thing? How could he refer to his family as “these people”? It was old programming. In truth, he wanted to help. As he continued to dress, he brought his mind back to the facts. Tim said that Kevin was out jogging and got hit by a car. His inju
ries weren’t life threatening.

  Arel took a couple of breaths and felt a little better. Kevin was tough. He’d be alright. Or would he? Arel remembered his nightmares. Kevin was always in the middle of them, looking like a lost soul. Were the dreams trying to tell him something?

  He snatched a pair of slacks off a hanger, not giving much thought to what he was putting on. He barely ran a brush through his hair. It was getting easier to disregard his appearance after taking care of houseguests at all hours.

  Hang in there, Kevin. If I can come to grips with life, so can you.

  Still, he had his doubts. He’d been there for Kevin the entire time the young couple had stayed with him, and it didn’t prevent Kevin from doing something foolish once he was on his own again.

  On some level, this wasn’t just an accident. You did this to yourself, Kevin. I know it.

  Eighty-Eight

  AREL FOLLOWED PEGGY and Tim into the hospital lobby with a confident step. He’d overcome his hospital fears. He was sure of it. He was sure of it until he inhaled a little too deeply and nearly gagged. There was no evidence of antiseptics or other noticeable hospital smells, but his overly sensitive nose wasn’t appeased. It issued a warning. ‘You know this place, and it’s always proven to be hazardous in one way or another.’

  No, that’s not true. I was here with Carol, and that episode turned out fine.

  While he was having the argument with himself, Peggy came over.

  “Are you alright?” she asked.

  Arel realized that he was still lingering close to the entrance doors, probably looking nervous. Now Peggy was staring at him with anxious eyes. He didn’t need to add to her worries. She was already upset enough over Kevin. “I’m fine. I just need a moment. Maybe you and Tim should go ahead to Kevin’s room? I’ll meet you there.”

  Peggy reached out and tried to smooth back his hair with her hands. It was thicker than ever now that he was healthy again. She let out a fussy sigh. “You don’t look quite yourself. But lord knows what I look like. I was too worried to care when I got dressed.”

  “You’re fine,” Tim said as he joined them. He took Peggy’s hand and gently pulled her towards a wide corridor. “We’ll see you soon,” he said glancing back at Arel.

  As they disappeared around a corner, Arel was glad that Tim was there for Peggy, but perhaps he’d been too hasty in sending them ahead. Now he was on his own.

  Just move along. Stop stalling and breathe. Hospital air is not going to kill you.

  He stepped into the main thoroughfare, glancing furtively to the right and left, eyeing the numerous staff members. They moved up and down the hallway in crisp, white coats that made him leery and fretful. He didn’t like what the nurses and aides wore either. Their colorful scrub tops, sporting kittens and other happy themes seemed like false advertising. Who were they fooling? They worked in a hospital. That meant sick people were lying in beds, probably in pain. What good was their bright clothing going to do?

  He had to stop halfway down the hall. He was getting caught up in his negativity again. In fact, he was hardly breathing. Run-away fears and oxygen deprivation were making him lightheaded. He sucked in a couple of breaths of air and felt worse. Maybe he didn’t need to breathe.

  Forget about yourself. You’re here for Kevin.

  The young man could be caring and helpful. He could also be an obstinate, “dig in your heels” kind of guy. From what Arel gathered after a recent conversation, Carol had a similar take on the man she loved. She painted a very sad picture. Kevin was unhappy most of the time, and he wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. As a result, Carol was going downhill too.

  Oh god, what if they both go under? I’ll have to be both mother and father to their baby! I’ll have to raise it myself!

  That thought was enough to get him breathing, but not normally. He knew what was coming next. Before he started into full-scale hyperventilating, he managed to find some privacy down one of the empty halls. The cure was a paper bag and a shift in his thinking. Neither was available. He kept imagining a bleak future. What if he made a terrible parent? What if the baby ended up hating him?

  Oh hell, I think I’m going to faint.

  He grabbed for a drab, hospital-green wall to steady himself as he felt the first signs of blacking out.

  “Arel, calm down! You’re not alone. I’m here.”

  He heard Michael’s voice in his mind. He also felt the angel’s energy soothing his body. Within a couple of minutes, he was able to slow his breath. It was enough to help him get a measure of clarity back. “Michael, please, tell me how to help Kevin. If you don’t, I might end up a single parent.”

  He could feel Michael’s light-hearted response. Was Michael laughing at him?

  “I’m not laughing at you, Arel,” Michael announced. “But you have to have some faith in Carol and Kevin. They’re both very capable, even if they don’t always act like it. They’re still finding their way.”

  “I wish they’d find it faster.”

  “I know, but in the meantime, I have something to share with you. It’s something that might help you keep your mind on other things.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “When you go back to the corridor, look at the people closely.”

  “I already looked at them.”

  “Look again, and I think you’ll see more than you did before.”

  “Great, what now?”

  This time Michael did laugh. “You’ll see.”

  “I’m glad you find this amusing,” Arel replied. When he felt well enough to trek back to the main hallway, he resisted Michael’s suggestion. He didn’t want to check out people. However, after his incident with Faine, he’d promised Michael that he’d listen to his advice. So he didn’t have any choice but to take a closer look at the passersby. Strangely enough, he liked what he saw. Every person who walked by him looked like someone out of an animated, Disney film. Everyone was engulfed in layered cocoons of color. “Bloody hell, am I seeing people’s auras?”

  Michael laughed again. “When you had that moment of panic, you opened up for a fraction of a second. I used the opportunity to activate that aspect of your perception. It’s normal from my point of view. It can be helpful when used as a tool. You can get a peek at what’s going on with people’s moods and emotions.”

  Arel snorted. “I’m in a hospital, so you gave me a diagnostic tool?” He did another sweep of the people around him. “You’re right, this is fascinating.”

  “Seeing auras might make it easier for you to manage your interaction with the energy fields around you.”

  “You mean that I can see what I’m doing.”

  “Precisely.”

  Eighty-Nine

  CAROL STOOD BY the hospital bed with her arms crossed. It was hard to ignore Kevin’s more glaring injuries. The entire right side of his face was raw and exposed from sliding on road gravel. His hands had suffered a similar fate. She was afraid to touch him for fear of hurting him.

  “I’m fine,” Kevin insisted. “The doc says I have some bruised ribs and a bump on my head. I guess I was out for a while so I’m here for observation. I’ll be released very soon.”

  “You don’t look fine.”

  “It was a dumb accident.”

  “Why weren’t you paying attention?”

  Kevin grunted out a heaving breath of frustration. “I don’t know, okay?”

  There was a long pause. Accident or not, Carol knew that Kevin was still emotionally detached. When Peggy had called her brother a clam, it was an accurate description.

  “So you contacted Peggy and Tim?” Kevin asked.

  “Yes, and Arel’s coming too.”

  Kevin’s face went flush. “This is so embarrassing. Do you know how many road safety lectures I gave him, not that he didn’t need them. He was worse than a four year old. He was so busy complaining that he didn’t have the sense to watch out for traffic.”

  Carol smiled, trying to lighten the mood. “Y
ou did a wonderful job helping him. He still gets out and runs at the crack of dawn every day.”

  “Yeah, I guess I did okay.”

  Carol put a hand on the hospital bed. “Do you have to be this way, Kevin?”

  “What? What am I doing?”

  “You have such a defeatist attitude.”

  “That’s ridiculous. I’m fine.”

  She hesitated, inching her hand closer to Kevin’s. “Please sweetie, for the last time, tell me what’s bothering you. I know there’s more to all of this than carelessness.”

  “Can’t you see I’m hurting,” Kevin groaned. “Why do you have to keep grilling me?”

  His question hung in the air like a sinking boat on a sea of mutual doubt. Pulling back her hand, Carol frowned. The worst was happening. They were both losing touch with each other, crashing into an emotional dead end.

  “Hi, Carol, we’re here!”

  Peggy and Tim stood in the doorway. Peggy’s cheerful greeting was enough to interrupt Carol’s downward spiral. She smiled back. “Hi guys, come in.”

  Carol’s first happy thought of the day was that Peggy could help Kevin. From what she knew, they had always been there for each other. Now, she’d have an ally, someone who would help Kevin to open up and talk. The thought was dashed almost immediately. As soon as Peggy stopped next to the hospital bed, she scowled at her brother.

  “Oh, look at you, Kevin! You’re a mess,” she cried out in a disappointed tone. “Why do you do this to yourself? You’ve had so many accidents over the years.”

  Kevin’s brows hardened into a straight line of defense. “Dammit Peggy, do you have to lecture me as soon as you get here?”

  Peggy stepped back, but her face remained stern and uncompromising. “I’m sorry. I just hate to see you like this.”

  Tim came over to the bed, placing himself between the twosome. He reached out to give Kevin’s shoulder a friendly thump. “The last time you looked this mauled up was when you had that playground accident. Didn’t you fly off a merry-go-round and land on your face?”