All She Ever Wanted (Cedar Valley Novel Book 1)

by Christina Butrum

  “Are you ready to give it back to me so I can tell you about them, or are you going to keep googly-eyeing my writing, which you probably can’t even read,” she asked, holding out her hand, waiting for her notebook to land in it.

  He handed her the notebook. “I’m not very patient,” he said. “I’m like that naughty five year old you see in stores, being told to ‘knock it off’ a million times as he’s asking his mother if they’re leaving yet.”

  He watched her eyes light up at the mention of a five year old. He imagined the thought of children made any woman happy, whether they were misbehaved or not. He knew from their talks over the last few weeks that children and marriage, along with a happy ending were all she could ever want. He hoped maybe one day he could give her all that, and more.

  “Are you going to listen to my ideas, or what?” she asked, an irritated look on her face.

  Had he really spaced out? He ran a hand through his hair to smooth it, and to calm his thoughts. Lord knew he didn’t want to upset her, and he’d been dying to hear her ideas. “Sorry, I got distracted by my thoughts,” he admitted.

  He raised his eyebrows and laughed when she raised a finger and shook it at him. “You’ll think thoughts.”

  “Start over, I promise I’ll be good and pay attention.”

  She crinkled her nose and pointed a crooked finger at him. “You’d better, mister.”

  She blew him a kiss, flipping back to page one of her masterpiece. She cleared her throat and said, “For starters, I want to clean the place up a bit.”

  He raised an eyebrow. He opened his mouth to say—

  Holding up a finger, she said, “Before you can say anything, I want to be fair and tell you that you and Gramps have done an excellent job this far, but that place needs a woman’s touch and I’m the woman it needs.”

  He chuckled, but was hushed by the look she sent his way.

  “I’m being serious,” she said, with her eyes glued on him.

  Holding up his hands in defense, he said, “I know.”

  Reading through her notes, she said, “So, once the place gets cleaned up with some flowers and stuff around…”

  He covered his face with his hand, shaking his head. He realized she had stopped talking and was now giving him the look. The look all women gave men when they had done something wrong. He held up his hands and said, “Nothing, I got nothing.”

  She smiled, continuing from where she left off. He watched the excitement beam from her as she talked about her plans of fixing the place up. He called it feminizing the place—casting a feminine appearance on it, but she called it making it appealing to everyone—not just the guys.

  “It brought you in there,” he said, smirking. His comment hadn’t been the smartest, and he regretted it once she threw that look at him again.

  “I didn’t have a choice,” she said, the tone in her voice was a mix of play and seriousness. “Rachel forced me to come with her.”

  “Aren’t you glad she did?”

  “That’s beside the point,” she said, a wide smile crossed her face, even though she tried to hide it. “Moving on. I’d really like to set up picnic tables outside,” she said. And before he could interrupt, she continued, “More than just the two you have out there.”

  Leaning forward, she asked, “What do you think about adding a bigger food selection on the menu with the booze?”

  “Are you serious? How?”

  She gave him the rundown of how the diner she had worked for had run their business. She explained that food would create more customers, no matter what was served. “If it’s good food, they’ll come back for more. And if they really liked it, they’ll tell their friends about it. The biggest advertisement you have in any kind of business is word of mouth from a happy customer.”

  He was shocked. She hadn’t confessed that she’d been so business-smart—yet she knew just as much, if not more, than he did. He was impressed. The more she talked, the bigger the picture in his mind became. Soon, he imagined a full parking lot of cars, a grill on the back deck with the smell of grilled burgers and brats filling the area, along with couples playing volleyball in the sanded court to the east of the bar.

  “We could have a deck on the back, and a huge grill to cook burgers and brats,” he said, without noticing if she was talking or not. If she had been, she sat quietly against her pillows with excitement. “We can have a sanded court for volleyball.”

  She scribbled onto a blank page as he talked. “There you go, now we’re onto something. Make it like a vacation place away from home, and people will never leave.”

  “And with advertising, you can’t count solely on your customers, so I plan to run an ad in the local newspapers,” she said. “I know that you’re probably thinking that this will cost a lot of money, but I have a plan for that, too.”

  He raised a brow. She was on a roll and he loved it. The ideas she had come up with in less than an hour were impressive, and had painted a picture for him to see.

  “With the food, we’ll have to pass inspections, yada yada yada,” she said, talking a bit fast, but he was following everything. “There will always be something that needs to be inspected, but I’m sure it’s nothing we can’t manage.”

  He watched her as she jotted down more things on paper. He waited to talk until she stopped writing—not wanting to interrupt her thoughts and completely derail the excitement.

  When she took a minute, and glanced away from her paper, and only when her eyes met his, he asked, “Are you planning on having Levy’s turn into a family type place or strictly no kids allowed.”

  “Well, that depends,” she said, flipping to a new page in her notebook. “What are your thoughts on that?”

  He shrugged. He didn’t necessarily want to say no to kids, but the thought of liability had always weighed heavily on his mind. “Honestly, I’d love to, but it’s enough to monitor for minors trying to drink, as it is, and adding kiddos to the mix would be a bit much,” he admitted.

  “I agree,” she said, scratching a line through kids. “How about we set up different deals for different days? You know, like the famous Taco Tuesdays?”

  He liked that idea. The thought of it alone would draw people in. “Yes, but do you really think we should have Taco Tuesday?”

  Shaking her head, she tapped her pen on her notebook. “Let’s be original. We’ll make up our own sloppy alliterated days of the week.”

  She quickly scribbled something about Monday through Friday at the top of her page. She tapped her pen against the paper and looked at him. He smiled and said, “I’m glad you’re on board with this project.”

  The smile she gave back to him was mesmerizing. Her eyes seemed to dance and her smile was bright. He couldn’t wait for the day she was released from the hospital.

  “I can’t wait to get started,” she said. “I wonder if they’ll release me early.”

  “You have another day,” he said.

  “But, I’m ready to go today, not tomorrow.”

  She’d been here for the last couple of days. As badly as he wanted to start on this project with her, he wanted her to get well and to stay well. “This can wait until you’re better. I don’t want you to overdo it once you’re discharged from here.”

  There was that look again—the look that he was beginning to enjoy. “I’ll be fine. Like one of my nurses said, it was a fluke deal and it shouldn’t have happened. I’m sure I’ll be fine.”

  She couldn’t wait to tell Rachel about her plans for Levy’s. Rachel would be ecstatic. They’d had many conversations about their ambitions and their goals in life. Rachel had set hers in stone early on, right after her divorce, whereas Leah had yet to figure hers out. Aside from the dreams of a husband and kids, she had never really thought of anything else. She had given herself no choice but to take life one day at a time—never sure when her opportunity to chase a bigger dream would present itself. Until now.

  Smiling at Liam, she asked, “Do you mind if I
call Rachel?”

  “Not at all,” he said, stretching as he stood from his chair. “I’m going to run home and check on Gramps. See if there’s anything that needs done.”

  He gently kissed her forehead. She looked up and puckered her lips at him, and laughing, he leaned closer to her. She pulled his shirt—pulling him down to her. The feeling of electric volts ran its course through her body. Wrapping her arms around him, she allowed her hands to travel at their will. His lips were hot against hers as she pried them apart—hungry for more.

  He smiled against her lips. Opening her eyes, she met his—bright and filled with desire. He slowly pushed away. “I’d better get going,” he said, smoothing his plaid shirt in an attempt to hide the tightening of his shorts. “You have a call to make.”

  With a quick peck on her cheek, followed by a wink, he left. She tightly sealed her lips, tracing them with a finger. That man had no idea what he was doing to her.

  The ringing of her phone startled her, causing her to jump at the interruption of her thoughts. Quickly grabbing it, a picture of Rachel and her lit up the screen.

  “Hey, I was just getting ready to call you,” Leah spoke softly into the phone.

  “That’s great, because I was getting antsy waiting for your call,” Rachel said. “I couldn’t wait any longer.”

  “Sorry for not calling back right away,” Leah said. “We got carried away with the plan for Levy’s.”

  “Hey, Lee,” Rachel said with hesitance. “When you talked about going to Cedar Valley…”

  “Spit it out, Rach.”

  “You’re for sure going, and staying there every day?” Rachel asked, seeming a bit too excited.

  “I wouldn’t be able to drive back and forth, so I don’t think I have a choice,” Leah said. “Not that I’d turn down this opportunity even if I could.”

  “Ok, good,” Rachel said.

  Leah had known Rachel long enough to know that she was holding something back. She wasn’t able to pinpoint what it could possibly be, but there was something she was excited about.

  “Do you not want me to go?” Leah asked. “Because if you—”

  Sniffles could be heard on Rachel’s end. Leah pushed the phone closer to her ear. “Rach, are you—”

  “I’m fine,” Rachel said, after a few more sniffles. “These dang hormones.”

  Leah’s eyes widened at the possibility... “Rach! Spill it!”

  “I was going to wait until you were out of the hospital to tell you,” Rachel said. “I didn’t want to dump all of this on you when you have other things going on.”

  “Rachel, if you don’t tell me right this minute, I’m going to—”

  “I’m pregnant,” Rachel interrupted Leah’s rant.

  Leah gasped. “Rachel, that’s great!”

  The thought of her best friend having a baby flooded her with mixed emotions. She was overwhelmed with happiness, but at the same time…

  “Lee, I really wanted to wait until you were…”

  “Don’t be silly. This is big news!” Leah said, hardly containing her excitement for her friend. “Are you busy right now?”

  Leah wanted to see her. She needed to see her so she could hug her and congratulate her. She wanted Rachel here with her, now more than ever.

  “Come to my room!” she exclaimed. “I want to see you!”

  “Okay, let me tell Scott, and I’ll be there.”

  Leah put her phone in her lap and stared at it. The news was great! She was happy for them! Rachel and Scott were the perfect couple. The perfect couple who would make excellent parents to that sweet precious baby of theirs.

  Leah wiped away the tears that had fallen prior to her nurse’s arrival. “Knock knock.” The nurse made her way in, carrying a tray with food that smelled delicious. “I brought you a dinner tray, I hope you’re hungry.”

  She set the tray down on the table next to Leah’s bed. The tray had an assortment of fruits and vegetables, along with a hot ham and cheese sandwich. She didn’t care too much for steamed vegetables, but they smelled good.

  “Is there anything else I can get for you?” the nurse asked, concern etched across her face. “Is there something wrong? Are you in pain? I can get you more pain medicine. Wait right here,” she said and turned for the door.

  Leah shook her head. “No, I’m fine. I don’t need anything else.”

  “Well, honey, you’ve been crying,” the nurse said, patting her on the shoulder. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  Leah nodded. She had no idea why the news of her best friend’s pregnancy had hit her so hard. She shouldn’t be having mixed feelings. She should be on top of the world—like Rachel would be for her someday.

  Picking up the Kleenex box, the nurse placed it in Leah’s lap. “If there’s anything I can do let me know. Even if it’s just to talk,” the nurse said. “I’m here for whatever you need.”

  “My best friend just told me that she’s expecting her first child.”

  Smiling as though she completely understood, she asked, “Do you have any of your own?”

  Leah shook her head. She felt foolish for having these feelings. “I’m happy for her, though.”

  The nurse cleared a spot to sit next to Leah. “When I was your age, I was always in a hurry to settle down. Get married. Have babies,” she said, placing a hand on top of Leah’s. “But there’s more to life than just that. And there’s no reason to rush. It’ll happen when it’s meant to happen.”

  Leah nodded. She imagined if her own mother was still around, this would be the conversation they’d be having right now. Instead, she was having it with a nurse.

  “I’ll tell you what I do know,” the nurse said. “The man who comes here to be with you...” The nurse said, waiting for Leah to look up before she said, “He truly does care a lot about you.”

  Leah nodded once again. She already knew this.

  “I’m sure he’ll be all you ever wanted, and more,” the nurse said, smiling.

  A knock at the door interrupted, and the nurse patted Leah’s knee, and said, “You just have to relax and live. There’s no sense in worrying as much as you do. I know, because I was once like you.”

  Opening the door, Rachel slid into the room around the curtain. The nurse kindly smiled at her as she made her way out of the room. Leah smiled, waving as the nurse pulled the door shut behind her.

  She waved Rachel closer to her and brought her into her arms, hoping she hadn’t heard any of the conversation. She hugged her close and said, “I’m so excited for you, Rach.”

  Rachel dropped her bag on the floor and sat down next to the bed. She tapped her finger against the coffee cup she had brought in with her. Leah could tell she was nervous—her thoughts were written all over her face.

  “Hey,” Leah said, attempting to break Rachel away from her distracted thoughts. “It’s going to be okay. I can only imagine how nervous you are.”

  Rachel had once been pregnant, but had miscarried at five months—after the doctors had told her that she’d have nothing to worry about for the rest of her pregnancy. Rachel had been through the wringer and it hadn’t seemed fair.

  “The time before wasn’t the right time,” Leah said, remembering all too well the conversation a few weeks after the miscarriage. She had comforted Rachel the best way she had known how to at the time—hugs, words and more hugs. “You have every right to be nervous and scared shitless. I would be too, if I were you, but I’d also be thankful and excited.”

  Rachel nodded slowly as she blew her nose. “I know,” she blubbered between sobs. “I just keep thinking; what if something happens. Or, what if I miscarry again?”

  Taking hold of Rachel’s hand, she pulled her towards the bed. Making Rachel sit down beside her, she wrapped her arm around her. She allowed her to cry and encouraged her to talk about all of her fears.

  “But what if you don’t?” Leah asked. “What if this time it’s meant to be, and you have one helluva beautiful baby?”

/>   She had never known Rachel to be fearful. She’d always been the exact opposite. The only two things Leah knew Rachel feared were divorces and miscarriages. Rachel was a strong woman who didn’t allow things to scare her. She had only seen this side of Rachel when she had shown up on her doorstep while going through the divorce. She had wanted to tell her ex-husband that she was pregnant, but needed advice on how to tell him. It wasn’t too long after that night she had her miscarriage. To Leah, it had seemed to answer for itself. Just like the nurse had said—if it’s meant to be, it’ll be.

  Rachel dried her eyes and cleared her nose with the rest of the Kleenexes from the box. Rachel held up the empty box and said, “I took the last of your Kleenexes. I hope you won’t be needing them anytime soon.”

  Waving a hand, Leah said, “Don’t worry about it.”

  Rachel laughed and a snot bubble escaped—which only made her snort and laugh harder. Leah laughed with her, without any idea Liam had entered the room.

  “Guess who’s expecting?” she asked Liam, pointing to Rachel.

  “Hey, congrats!” Liam said, making his way with open arms to Rachel. “That’s great!”

  Leah smiled at the warm exchange between them. Liam had a kind heart and a pleasant personality to go with it—not even Rachel’s crazy crying could deter him.

  * * *

  “Has Leah told you about her big plan for the bar?” Liam asked Rachel.

  “Not yet,” Rachel said, throwing her used tissues into the garbage can. “With working all these crazy hours and dealing with morning sickness, I’m not sure how I’m still standing.”

  “I can’t imagine,” Leah said. “It has to be tough. Is Scott excited about the pregnancy?”

  Rachel’s face twisted with emotion and Leah realized she had made a mistake with asking that question. Glancing at Liam, she raised an eyebrow and he responded with a slight shrug of his shoulder.

  Standing up, he kissed her forehead. “I’m going to run and grab a few things. Do you need me to bring back anything?”