by Shey Stahl
A warning voice whispers in my head, telling me to choose my words carefully. “The only thing I ever lied about was loving you.”
That wasn’t chosen carefully.
His eyes narrow, blinking rapidly. “You know what? I’ve changed my mind.” He begins pacing the space between us. “I’m not gonna take you back with me after all, no, it’s better we just end this here.”
Here? Oh God, no, please no. Not here.
“It doesn’t matter now, does it?” His voice remains cold and lashing to the point, I flinch away from him. “Whether you loved me or not doesn’t matter because after today, you’ll never get the chance to love anyone.” He suddenly stops pacing and cocks the gun loading a bullet into the chamber.
Every muscle tightens, locks in place, and I can’t physically move. All the fear and shame for what I brought into their lives comes crashing over me. I think about a lot of things in that moment: fear, regret, blame, guilt.
All of that leads back to this moment.
I led Ben here.
He’s here for me.
He’s holding a gun, pointed at my head, because of my choices.
I put them in danger.
With death staring me in the face, I know I have no choice but to stand here, and I also know any second Red is going to come walking in behind me and Ben will see him. I even count the seconds from the time I hear the latch of the backdoor to the ten seconds it takes for him to appear.
I turn slightly, stiffness marring my movements as my gaze shifts to Red as he takes the first step inside, met with Ben holding a gun.
His steps are hesitant. He knows he needs to be careful the moment he sees the gun pointed at my head.
Ben notices him and turns to aim the gun at him. “Ah, yes, welcome to party, Red. So nice of you to join us.”
Slowly, Red looks at me, all emotion gone from his face as he swallows, his jaw flexing.
There’s a moment when he stares at me, his expression darkening with an unreadable emotion. I swallow hard, trying to manage a feeble answer as to why I’ve put his daughter in danger. “Oh God, I’m so sorry, Red.”
His furious stare sweeps to Ben. “Lenny, where’s Nova?”
Ben smirks and tilts his head in my direction. “Oh, don’t worry, Red. Your precious little girl is right here. Safe and sound… for now.”
At that moment, Nova takes a deep breath and moves from behind me stepping to my side so that she is in clear view of not only Red but Ben.
Red spots her, and I can see a small flicker of relief flash across his face, but his relief is short lived as he turns his gaze back to Ben. “Get the fuck out of here before I shove that gun up your ass.” Each word is a growl, a distinct warning, but he doesn’t move from his place by the door.
Ben gestures to Nova with a sharp nod. “I wouldn’t be so tough acting there, Reddington. I can bring you to your fucking knees right now and you know it. You may not even care what I do to Lenny, but we both know what you do care about, what you are afraid of.” And then he points the gun at Nova’s head and snatches her by the hair to his side.
I gasp in horror, my hand flying to my mouth, a sensation of intense sickness and despair sweeping over me. “Don’t hurt her!” I scream, grasping in thin air attempting to catch her. I’m not quick enough.
“Daddy…,” Nova whispers, her word shaking as she winces in pain, her lips imprisoning a sob from letting go.
Ben kicks my knee, buckling my stance immediately. “Shut the fuck up! Stay back!”
I want to kill him for touching her, and it’s everything I can do to stay still. Standing up, I refuse to show any pain.
Red takes a step toward Ben, unable to stand there. There’s fire in his eyes. It courses through him, burning steadily until he is engulfed completely. “Let her go, you piece of shit.” He shakes his head when he speaks, every muscle rigid.
“No. I don’t think so. So tell me, Red, how long have you been fucking my wife?” Ben asks him, keeping a tight grip on Nova’s hair.
My heart hammers erratically as a hint of arrogance touches the corners of Red’s mouth. I can tell he wants to say some smartass comment that’s guaranteed to piss Ben off, but he has enough sense to know the danger we’re in and the fact that his daughter has a gun pointed at her head. In his eyes, I can see his struggle to remain impassive, refusing to give him the satisfaction of an answer.
“What’s the matter, Red?” Ben’s eyes narrow, rigid, hard, cold, black eyes that hold no repercussions of his impulsive actions. He begins to pace again, dragging Nova with him. “Cat got your tongue or is it that you don’t want your little girl knowing how her daddy is fucking a lying whore?” Red has his arms by his side, but I can see them twitching, his body’s natural reaction to protect his daughter. He wants to run to her, but it’s taking all of his strength to hold his ground.
“Daddy!” Nova screams again, tears running down her face as she tries to break free to run to Red.
Ben is quicker and grabs her hair, yanking her to the ground and away from Red. “Where do you think you’re going, you little shit?”
“Nova!” I scream, watching him throw her like a ragdoll.
“Let. Her. Go!” Red growls.
Ben quickly grabs Nova off the ground and grabs a hand full of her curls to keep her at his side.
“Why should I, huh? I mean, you’re the one sleeping with my wife.” Ben’s eyes glaze over, tears forming. It’s the drugs. They make him emotional. “Where I come from, there’s consequences for that.”
“You fucking son of a bitch!” Red’s control is fading. “Let her go!”
“Daddy!” Nova cries, sobbing now. “He’s hurting me!”
Ben shakes her. “Shut the fuck up!” And then he slaps his hand across her mouth, letting go of her hair to keep her silent. She’s going to bite him. I just know it. Silently, I beg her not to. If she does, it’s over. He’ll shoot her in the head. I can tell by the fitful expression on his face, he would pull the trigger on her without a second thought.
Tears forming in Red’s eyes, he knows it too. “I’m going to kill you!” he vows, his body convulsing in anger. “Let go of my daughter! I’m going kill you… I’m fucking….” He can’t finish, he can’t even catch his breath when Nova begins to scream hysterically, fighting against the hold Ben has on her.
I pray right then Tyler can hear this from upstairs. I want her to cry louder so maybe she has a chance at surviving this.
“Ben, let her go!” I scream. “She’s a little girl and has nothing to do with this.”
He turns to me, eyes wide and crazy with anger. “This is your fault.” He holds the gun tighter to Nova’s temple, the metal of the barrel making an indentation against her skin. “She’s going to die because of you.” He shakes his head erratically, his voice somewhat quiet, yet holds a coldness I can’t shake. “That’s on you. Everything’s fucking on you, Lenny.”
“Shut the fuck up!” Red roars, his face blazing with wrath as he steps forward once more. “Let my daughter go!”
“Now, now. No need to yell.” Ben’s voice is suddenly calm and relaxed as he eyes Red. “What did you think was going to happen, Red? Do you think I’m going to just let you take what’s mine? Fuck you. Touch what’s mine and there will be hell to pay.”
“I’m going to say it one more time, you take that fucking gun away from my daughter’s head or I’m going to kill you. Lenny’s not your goddamn property. She left you. Get that through your thick skull. It’s over. You’re never getting her back.”
“You’re right, but not because you said so. No. It’s because this is where it ends.” Ben lifts his chin, giving Red a nod. “Let me ask you, does this feel familiar to you? I read about you, you know. Amazing what you can find on the internet these days. Didn’t your wife die because you weren’t man enough to save her, am I right?”
Red reacts in one swift movement twisting around to the tool cart beside him and sends it crashing to the ground.
>
Please, God, let Tyler hear this!
“Ah, look at that. What’s the matter? The truth hurts, don’t it? You’re losing control now. I’m getting to you, aren’t I?” Ben glances at me and smiles. “Even the toughest of them fall.”
“You got nothing on me, you fucking son of a bitch.” Red never moves his belligerent focus from Ben. “You think you’re a man? You come in here with a gun threatening a child. You’re nothing! I can promise you one thing, you’re not walking out of here.”
I reach over and try to pull Nova away from Ben’s grasp, but all my attempt does is piss him off more. He takes the butt of the gun and slams it into the side of my face. “I told you to stay there. You never fucking listen!”
Stunned, I blink rapidly to regain my vision.
With the force of Ben’s movements, Nova stumbles to the ground, her knees hitting the concrete as she falls from his hold.
She scowls at Ben and stomps on his foot. “Leave her alone!” she screams at Ben and grabs onto me.
Holding her to my side, I use my other hand to feel the side of my face. It’s wet as blood rushes from a gash on my cheek. My eyes instinctively go to Red as he picks up a jack handle and takes a step toward Ben.
A wicked smile curves Ben’s lips as he leans in to whisper harshly in my ear, his eyes on Nova. “Looks like he’s ready for a fight now.”
When Red takes another step, Ben reacts and fires the gun.
The bullet just misses Red’s left foot and ricochets off the lift and into the wall. “I said stay the fuck there! Stay back! Don’t move!”
Red stops immediately as Nova lets out a cry of horror, her hands over her ears as her wailing cry pierces my ears.
I have to do something. I can’t stand by any longer and let this happen. “Enough, Ben! Okay? You win. I’ll leave with you! I will. Just leave them alone.” I reach for Nova, scrambling with lies, anything to get him to lose focus on Red and Nova. “Please!” I scream, a suffocating sensation threatening to swallow me whole.
“No! Too little too late, Lenny. You had your fucking chance for that.” He glances at me, wild eyes and quick breaths. “I don’t want you anymore.” His voice stings my face like a blast of cold water. “And because you’re such a fucking pain in my ass, I’m going to kill them both while you watch.”
There’s no doubt in his words as he loads another bullet in the chamber. Nothing unsure about his actions. He wants to destroy my future, a future I deserve without him in it. There’s a brief second when I look into his volatile scowl, beg him to think about what he’s doing. He can’t. His head has long since spun and made sense of anything he’s doing.
My gaze shifts to Red. He’s fixated on Ben, never moving. He looks at the gun and I see the severity of what’s happening reflected in his eyes. The realization Ben is not just making empty threats, but there’s also no way in hell Red’s going down without a fight.
Ben shifts so that he’s facing Nova and aims the barrel of the gun straight at her temple. Red takes a step toward him, his fist clenching, his jaw tight as his mouth clamps shut.
“Daddy! Please!” Nova screams again.
“Everything is going to be fine, Nova. Just stay calm and trust me, okay?” Red urges her, his grip tightening on the crowbar in his hand.
“If I were you, I’d stay out of this,” Ben says, not bothering to even look at Red, his eyes locked on me, the one who’s betrayed him. “I won’t miss the next time.”
“No. Fuck you.” Red moves forward another step, not caring. “Put the gun down now!” His voice is sharp, a menacing growl that makes me flinch as he defensively blocks Ben from Nova and me. He doesn’t touch him, but he’s close enough, aware of the weapon in his hand. “Get away from Lenny and my daughter or I promise you you’re going to leave here in a fucking body bag.”
“I doubt that.” Ben aims the gun at Red now, agitation in his jerked movements. “You see, Red, you’re forgetting something very important right now. I hold the power.”
Red’s shoulders tense, his eyes cold and detached. “The only reason you’re not dead right now is because you’re holding a fucking gun like a pussy because you can’t fight like a real man.” I shift slightly, hoping to block Nova from Ben’ sight. I’m not sure if it’s from shock, or what, but she’s not saying anything now. Her eyes are sharply focused on what is happening in front of her. Her face red, blotchy marks color her cheeks and neck, the only indication of her fear.
Please don’t let this ruin her. Please don’t let her remember it.
Ben looks to me, his eyes intent, darkness and drugs restricting his mind. “How’s it feel, Red?” His focus shifts back to him, his anger abated somewhat under the warm glow of his patronizing smile. “Here you are again. It’s like déjà vu. Another situation where you can’t protect the woman you love. Well, who’s it gonna be, your kid, or my wife?”
Red swallows hard, trying not to reveal his anger. “Neither, you stupid son of a bitch. It’s going to be you if you don’t put that gun down.”
“Leave us alone!” Nova yells out of nowhere as she lunges and slams Ben’s knee with a wrench.
“Fuck!” Ben yells as his body jerks in pain. His reaction gives Red the opening he’s been waiting for to lunge and knock the gun out of his hands.
They collide with a grunt against the lift. Red gets the first swing in and knocks the gun to the floor. The next hit is a heavy blow that connects with Ben’s jaw and attests to Red’s strength and power.
The intensity of the next few moments has me forgetting how to breathe. They collide and fall to the concrete floor, wrestling around, taking swings. Red’s punches are quick and with a force I never imagined he was capable of. Sure, he’s a big guy, but this is something else entirely. It’s fueled by pure rage and pent-up emotion.
There’s something more here than him protecting his daughter. Each blow confirms it. His intention is to take back what was taken from him two years ago, a situation so similar but he’s determined to make sure it ends. He wasn’t going to let Ben walk away without getting the vengeance that was rightfully his to recover.
Red’s hits come with relentless force and for the briefest of moments, I stare in disbelief at what I’m seeing. I’ve witnessed the harshness his temper could release, but this is entirely different. It’s almost animalistic. A lion protecting his territory. The problem is, Ben is high and doesn’t feel the same pain. Nothing can stop him and that’s against Red.
They part for a split second as Red wipes the back of his hand over his mouth and lunges for Ben again. They slam into a car, Ben’s head snapping back with the force of Red’s body plowing into him.
Red’s wild eyes, mixed between fury and fear, land on mine. He knows this can twist at any second allowing Ben to get the gun at their feet. “Lenny, GO! Get Nova the fuck out of here!”
Ben thrashes around, struggling against Red’s grip as he tries to free himself as blood pours from his mouth and right eye. It’s then with Red’s attention on us, Ben gets a solid hit in on Red. He staggers back against the lift, trying to find his footing.
As they fight to gain control over one another, I rush Nova across the shop, our feet scrambling against the concrete to the exit. Once we’re outside, I turn to Nova, my hands shaking as I wipe away her tears. “Nova, baby, listen to me. I want you to run upstairs and get Tyler!” I rush her toward the stairs. “Tell him to call 911!”
She turns and starts to run up the stairs. I wait for her to get to the top before rushing to get back inside. I’m hoping that I can somehow distract Ben so that Red can take him down until the police get here. But before I can get one foot through the door the sound of a bullet exiting the chamber cuts through the blood whooshing in my ears. It’s like a crack of thunder, but it’s Nova’s scream that makes my heart stop. I look up and she’s standing at the top of the stairs, her hands fly to her ears, her wide eyes fixated on mine.
I inhale a quick, sharp breath and run into the shop just in
time to see Red fall to his knees.
Have you heard of Newton’s third law of motion? Every action has an equal and opposite reaction? It all goes back to one saying. You’re able to choose, but you’re never free from the consequences of your actions. There’s no reset, there’s no takeback, there’s an action, and an outcome.
My consequence is this. Red, lying motionless before me, the front of his shirt soaked in blood.
It’s the distant howl of sirens that brings me back and Nova reacting to the scene before us. She cries, nearly uncontrollable begging for her daddy to wake up.
“Red, please hold on!” I scream when his head lulls to the side, but between the rush of my blood and my pounding heart, it sounds like a whisper.
His head turns at the sound of my voice, his bloody face causing me to gasp at the sight. I hadn’t realized he’d been hit that much. His face is swollen, his chest, mouth, and hands bleeding and I know he’s in trouble. I have to find where he’s been shot.
Just as I’m searching, lifting up his shirt as gently as I can, Tyler comes barreling through the door. “Holy shit! What…?” His voice fades when he sees Red on the ground and Nova screaming. “Oh my God.”
I have his shirt open and then wad it up to make a ball to put pressure on the reddened hole in his chest that’s oozing with dark congealing blood. The moment pressure is applied to his chest, he moans weakly, trying to lift his hand to mine. It’s breaking my heart to cause him more pain, but I have to stop the bleeding. A sob rips from my throat. “I’m so sorry. I’m so so sorry!”
Tyler stops and stares down at Ben, ten feet from Red where he lays unconscious in a pool of blood with a torque wrench beside him. Red must have hit him with it.
“911 is on their way.”
“Is he dead? Get the gun away from him!” I bark orders at Tyler, and he checks his pulse after kicking the gun away.
“He’s alive… I think.” Tyler whispers and then rushes to Red’s side.
As I sit here trying like hell to stop the blood pouring out of Red’s chest, to save his life, all I can think of is ending Ben. I can see the gun. It would be easy. He deserves to die, but I can’t, not from some moral obligation, but because finishing Ben would mean leaving Red and I can’t leave Red right now. So I remind myself that with the bastard alive, at least he will have to pay for what he’s done.