Apostle of the Sleeping Gods

by Dan Sugralinov

  “Aw nether! This is not VR, there won’t be any popup guides. But we can follow the arrows,” Rita suggested. “There, do you see?”

  In the air, high above the ground, there hovered huge holographic letters and arrows:

  Welcome to Glasto, the greatest rock festival in the world!

  Pyramid stage – that way!

  Turning my head, I saw similar arrows pointing to a few other stages, and to a circus and some other attractions.

  “What you do is up to you, but I want to drink,” Goosebumps announced. “And right this instant!”

  “I’m with you!” Chris said, delighted. He whispered something into Raven’s ear, and she laughed. “Ray’s in! Who else?”

  Nobody refused. We tracked down a mobile bar and – lo and behold! – were sold alcohol without even having our personal information or ages checked. This was indeed a festival of freedom.

  We each took a bottle of dark beer and joined the procession heading for the main stage. From there, we heard heavy guitar riffs and someone singing in a hoarse voice.

  Everyone around was bubbling with excitement, going crazy, and not in a bad way. Some danced, some drank, some laughed. People said “Hi!” and smiled as they passed by. We did the same back and, as we continued in that vein toward the stage, I got a call to my comm.

  I picked up and saw Tissa’s face, looking pale. She was lying in a medical pod.

  “Alex,” her voice was meek. “How are you?”

  “Good. I tried to call all morning, but your dad answered. He told me what happened.”

  “Yeah, he mentioned that. I just woke up. They want to put me under again, but I asked if I could make a call first. Are you doing okay?”

  “I’m fine. What are the doctors saying?”

  “Some weird crap. They don’t know. They can’t make a diagnosis. There’s just a high temperature that won’t subside. The boys have the same. Woah, what’s all that noise? Where are you?”

  “I... I’m at Glastonbury. With the Woods and their friends. Your father said you wouldn’t be waking up until Sunday evening, and I didn’t want to level in Dis without you.”

  “With the Woods? And that... Overweight, she’s there too?”

  “Yes, she’s here. You want me to say hi for you?”

  “As if,” Tissa chuckled.

  “You want me to fly back and see you?”

  “No, come on! Unwind out there! Have enough fun for all of us! Just... don’t go too crazy, Alex. I’m jealous!”

  Right after, that the call was over, and I had an idiotic smile plastered on my face.

  Interlude 3. Eve

  APHRODITE, LAGGING a bit, was walking behind Crag and admiring him. She couldn’t make sense of her feelings, but part of her opinion hinged on a very important thought: he liked her. Her, the real Eve O’Sullivan in her true appearance.

  After the plastic surgery, it took a long time for Eve to get used to how she looked in the mirror. Despite her newfound beauty, it was hard to really see herself in it.

  Her body structure had been severely altered, even going so far as to lengthen her bones and spine to make her taller and her arms and legs longer. Because of that, she had to learn to walk and control her limbs all over again basically from scratch. She was like an ungainly teen shooting up eight inches overnight and now she didn’t know what to do, how to cope with it all. Of course, Eve actually was just such an ungainly teen. Just the other day, she had been playing with dolls.

  After the plastic surgery, she had to fly to the Moon to a special clinic for physical therapy in reduced gravitation. She told Alex it was to get some R and R, but it was hard to call what she did there relaxing. She was just getting used to her body, she even learned to love the pain. It was healthy. It meant her body was getting stronger.

  Back home when she went back into Dis, she was pleasantly surprised to see that her character Aphrodite looked the same as ever. With the excess weight, fat deposits and a double if not triple chin, puffy cheeks, swollen eyelids and lackluster eyelashes.

  Her power leveling contract with Axiom had expired and the leader refused to take her on again. So, not knowing what to do, she went back to the same old bench outside the Bubbling Flagon. Her first day back, people noticed her and even asked where she had been, where her buddy was.

  By day two, she was back to being ignored. Even Alex, now always hanging around with Tissa and other classmates, didn’t notice her.

  That very evening, Eve mustered some courage and went over to his house. She was prepared for anything except for what she actually found. Melissa Schafer was there and, based on how casual and loose she was acting... That ruined everything. Eve felt her hopes and dreams, illusions really, cracking to pieces when she saw Melissa half-naked and perched Alex’s lap

  The next few days flew by in a fog. She lived like an android: just mechanically getting through each day. She sat through lessons, came back home unresponsive then entered Dis on autopilot to spend her required hour sitting on the same old bench.

  Then one of those days, a warrior in a full suit of plate armor came up, sat next to her and said hello.

  And that was how she met Tobias. They started talking and found out they had lots of things in common: Crag also had no friends IRL, and Eve concluded he was another lonely soul. He was also very sensitive. When Eve told him that Axiom had turned her down and she didn’t know where else to turn, he offered his help. And completely for free.

  They said a warm goodbye when Eve decided to leave Dis because her required time was over. But with surprise, she realized she wanted to stay.

  The next day, Crag was waiting for her on the very same bench.

  Wandering around Dis with him felt like a pleasant little walk. The warrior easily defeated both high-number packs and high-level mobs. He also protected her. They completed the City Jail dungeon without even dying one time, even though the instance was intended for groups of five. In fact, it all went off without the slightest hitch. By the second boss, Eve had gotten a taste for it, shooting down mobs with gusto as they came after Crag. And she never really took a hit.

  At any rate, battles were starting to come much easier to her, even on her own. Now, when she remembered how badly she’d been hurt by the teeth and claws of aggressive level-two bunnies, she didn’t understand how it ever could have happened.

  Realizing Eve was afraid of pain, Crag gave her a full set of green equipment and a blue gnomish rifle.

  “Easy, convenient, self-loading,” Crag said, beaming. “All you need to do is point the barrel and pull the trigger.”

  The rifle changed everything. Not counting bosses, it could kill any mob in just one or two shots! It seemed unbelievable, but Eve liked it so much that she started spending longer than necessary in Dis. Truthfully though, for some reason, it only happened when Crag was with her.

  “I have a special aura,” Tobias said with a broad smile. “No, I’m serious. A special class talent. When you’re in a group with me, you become stronger.”

  Neither of them were fans of large crowds. The only way they could talk more privately was by walking around the sandbox and beating down the packs of mobs they happened across. They hadn’t even mentioned meeting IRL yet.

  Once again they were wandering far from human settlements. They swam in the Tremitelle where it widened, it’s flow becoming peaceful and devoid of angry sharp-toothed little fish. They gathered berries at vineyards, fooled around by a little pond, skipping stones.

  To Tobias, all this was a real novelty. He hadn’t told her about his family, but Eve had drawn the conclusion that he did not come from a pampered background. But realizing that only made her more attracted to him. Alex never really listened when she talked, but Tobias hung on her every word with bated breath.

  “Have you heard about the new instance?” he asked her one day. “No one has been able to pass it yet. Wanna go? Intrigued?”

  Eve smiled and just nodded. Everything in this world intrigued her
with Tobias around.

  They learned about the new ins from a global notification. Their interest piqued, they went to Tristad and there, on the square before the temple of Nergal the Radiant, they found out where the new dungeon was located. Then Eve saw Alex again. He even waved at her. Embarrassed, she turned away and didn’t respond. But Tobias did.

  “You know him?” Eve asked, surprised.

  “Yep. A little weirdo,” he answered laconically. “Same as me.”

  Today, they weren’t walking just to walk. They had a purpose. Tobias radiated confidence that he could easily pass the Sarantapod Hive and take the achievement. Walking through the packs of mobs in the Goro Gorge, Tobias never stopped talking even for a minute. He was telling her about achievements, how highly valued they were, and how lucky he was that nobody had passed the new dungeon yet.

  “First Kill, Eve, can you picture it?” he said ardently. “This is so cool! Before I could only dream of stuff like this!”

  “And what changed?” she smiled a wily smile.

  “I met you,” Tobias answered.

  It was the right answer. Eve liked that he said it without hesitation or thought, not like Alex when she asked him to the New Year’s Dance.

  That, for the record, was an impulse decision to test her new charms. But it backfired: Sheppard floundered, and started burbling. And too bad. If he had said yes, she would have laughed in his face with great satisfaction and said something along the lines of, “In your dreams, loser!”

  I mean, who even was he? His parents, never exactly ones to reach for the stars, were getting divorced; in school, based on the charts, he was doing worse; and most importantly, even in Dis he was a loser. She wouldn’t be surprised if he failed his citizenship tests. It would serve him right! He got pulled in by Schafer the flirt’s cute little face, unable to see the true inner beauty and feelings of his childhood friend!

  But Tobias, on the other hand, was doing great in that regard. Imagining his surprise when he saw her IRL, Eve laughed to herself happily and quietly. They were both letting it wait, simply enjoying their relationship in Dis. The fact that everything was happening in a fake world gave them both courage. They had already kissed, and Eve was afraid to think of taking it further for the time being. At the very least, she was certainly not going to make the first move. It would be another thing if Tobias asked her out, like on a date. Then... Eve blushed.

  “I think we’re here,” Crag’s voice brought her back to her senses. Good thing he was looking the other way and hadn’t seen the blush in her cheeks. “There are a lot of guys there. Looks occupied. Anyway, let’s go see what’s what.”

  Tobias took her by the hand. Their fingers interlaced very naturally and they headed down the wide gulley. There, down at the far end, the flickering oval of a portal led into the dungeon.

  Eve bristled, remembering her first time in a dungeon with Alex. It wasn’t all that long ago, but it felt like years had passed. She wasn’t afraid anymore. In fact, her arms were itching to point her gun, fire a Burst or Explosive Shot at some monster’s face and see the blood spatter and white skull fragments fly. Eve realized these were unusual urges for a young girl but, every time she killed that way, she grew more confident, providing further confirmation that the old Eve – embarrassed and fearful – had been left in the past. Furthermore, it was all make-believe.

  Yet again immersed in a memory, she didn’t realize right away that Tobias was yelling at someone.

  “What, don’t get the picture? Get lost!” came a sullen voice, echoing off the walls of the crevasse. “And take your bimbo with you!”

  Eve raised her head and saw her boy, his head drooping, just listening as Axiom insulted him. She knew one of them, Atiyakari, a level-twenty cutthroat. He used to lead her power leveling group. He was the one who called her a bimbo!! Sanguine mist clouded her eyes.

  “Who you callin’ bimbo, moron?” she shouted, walking in his direction.

  Tobias stood gently in her path and, embracing her, pulled her aside.

  “Please don’t,” he said quietly. “That asshole isn’t worth it, Eve. We’d better get out of here.”

  Her rage ebbed. Crag could always cheer her up or calm her down with just a couple words. Like now.

  “But why?” she asked, still wanting to know more. After all, they were planning to pass this dungeon. She wanted to pass it! “Is the dungeon occupied?”

  “No,” Tobias admitted after a brief hesitation. “Axiom got their grubby little hands on the ins. Yesterday, they were letting people enter for a thousand gold but, since this morning, it’s been off limits. Big Po wants that First Kill, then he’ll let other people try.”

  “But that’s not fair!” Eve exclaimed. “What gives him the right? Like how? I would understand if the dungeon was occupied, but it isn’t! Why isn’t anyone objecting? I am not gonna give up on this!”

  As usual when she encountered injustice, she was now shouting at full capacity. And on a backdrop of complete silence. The Axiomites were eavesdropping with great interest, adding some color to their boring shift.

  “What Crag, your fat girlfriend nagging?” Atiyakari asked, concerned. “Does that mean she’s also kind of a ganker?”

  His crew, a few girls among them, whinnied zealously.

  “Just ignore them,” Tobias whispered to Eve. “I’ll handle this. On my own.”

  Leaving her, he walked up to the bully and asked loudly:

  “You know what, Sanji, I’d watch my mouth if I was you. Eve is in a lot better shape than your girlfriend, Big Po. Do you know what Po really stands for? Pooper, and he’s got a huge one! Admit it, you’d do anything for it...”

  Atiyakari’s face changed. His clanmates whistled all at once in surprise, preparing for an impromptu performance.

  “Don’t go looking for trouble, church freak,” the cutthroat said threateningly. “Wanna spend a bit more time on the KoS list? We can add some no problem!”

  “Listen, I don’t want any problems,” Tobias admitted. “You insulted my girl, I had to say something. You apologize, I apologize, we leave.”

  Eve was bursting at the seams to add a few things, but reason prevailed over her feelings. Tobias was right, they were doing just fine. To hell with the ins. An apology would be enough.

  “Me? Apologize? I suppose you want me to bow for you as well? Get down on one knee? Did I say something wrong? Is she fat? Yes. Is she a bimbo? Well sure, she ain’t a dude. Was she nagging? You better believe it. So get your asses out of here, you retarded piece...” Atiyakari spat at Crag’s feet and went invis.

  A second later, he appeared behind Crag and gave him a wholehearted stab in the butt. The Axiomites laughed in mockery, which was the final straw. Eve realized combat mode had switched on.

  And the loudest laughter of all was not directed at Tobias but her. Babe, a tall blonde hussy with sharp cheekbones was pointing a finger and guffawing. And she wouldn’t stop laughing even when Tobias swung his sword and decapitated the person standing next to her.

  Eve took out her rifle and grinned. She pointed the barrel at the blonde’s face... Explosive Shot! Burst!

  Her head exploded, spattering blood and brains while her body slumped onto the ground. Tobias cut Atiyakari to bits with two swings and slammed his shield into the nearest enemy. Eve started shooting with abandon at the now stock-still dungeon guards...

  She gave a delighted squeal and didn’t even shudder when she saw a huge barbarian charging her way. Crag intercepted him and Eve pumped him full of lead with enormous satisfaction.

  Five minutes later, the Axiomites were all dead. Tobias, covered head to toe in someone else’s blood, looted them all in a business-like fashion, lit up at the epic drop then gave Eve a very big hug and kissed her. “This must be happiness,” she thought.

  Then Tobias backed off and frowned.

  “This is gonna cause problems,” he said. “Still, I don’t think our punishment can get any worse. We might as well go in.”


  “We can take ‘em, sweetheart,” Eve answered. “Together.”

  “Then let’s go in and play.”

  And so, they entered the Sarantapod Hive.

  Chapter 26. Cooking Tournament

  GLASTONBURY LEFT ME with great memories. We raged at the concert, ate some tasty food, drank a lot and, by daybreak, when just Rita and I were left on the balcony of the mini-hotel room, I no longer wanted anything but to lie down and sleep. I had let Karina sit on my shoulders for a better view of the stage, so my back and legs were aching. And my head was just splitting.

  After midnight, the three of us, wrapped in blankets, sat on big chairs on the balcony and the girls started an endurance competition: who could prove more stubborn and end up alone with me. Rita won in the end, but it was a pyrrhic victory. While I took Karina to her room, Overweight fell asleep in my bed. I had to sleep in an armchair.