by Deena Remiel
He smiled hungrily and leaned over to devour her lips in a ravenous kiss. He withdrew, shaking his head as if to clear it. “As much as I’d like to devour the whole of you right this very minute, we have Monica coming over, and she’ll be here shortly. Believe it or not, it’s almost noon.”
“What!” She gasped. “You’ve got to be kidding me. I’ve never gotten up so late in my life! You’re corrupting me, Raphael. That’s what it is. You are a bad influence on me.” As quick as a flash, she pushed herself up onto him, straddling his naked length. She slithered slowly up his body like a snake until her lips barely touched his. “Corrupt me some more.”
“Holy shit, Serena!” he managed to squeak out. “I’m never one who has to be asked twice.”
First, he feasted on her lips, her throat, and vigorously flipped her onto her back to set her ablaze with hot, wet kisses on every inch of her body. She turned the tables on him and sent him over the edge with sensuous strokes of his wings and other irresistible places. Fast and ferocious, their lovemaking took on an urgency, as though they hadn’t made love just a few hours before. As though they would perish without its sustenance. Indeed, afterwards they both felt energized, and rushed through showers to get ready for Monica’s return visit.
Just in the nick of time, too, for the doorbell rang not five minutes after settling in on the living room couch. Raphael looked through the peephole to be sure it was her, and opened the front door with a smile.
“Good afternoon, Monica, and how are you doing today?”
“Good afternoon, Raphael, just fine on this glorious day. I see you’re dandy, so how’s our girl, eh?”
“I’m doing really well.” Serena walked up behind her angel, hugging him to her side.
“Hmm. So I see,” she remarked, raising a brow. “Well, doorways were meant for coming or going, so let’s not linger here any longer. Shall we go to the living room? I think it would the best place to set up for the day.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
“Uh, Serena, dear, get yourself a comfy pillow, and take out the couple of items I brought in my bag. Put them on the coffee table. All right? Raphael, can I see you a moment in the kitchen?”
“Sure.” Great, he thought. She doesn’t look pleased.
As she entered the kitchen, she whirled around to face him. “What kind of man are you, Raphael, to lead a girl on so?” she spewed. “I know you’ve…connected, shall we say. It’s written all over your faces. Are you that cruel a person as to have your way with the girl, using her like some kind of receptacle, knowing that your wife’s soul lies within her? I don’t understand. You are not the man, the angel, I thought you were.”
“Now hold on a minute here, Monica,” he objected hotly. “First of all, what I do is none of your damn business. Second of all, I’m in love with her!” What did he just say? Where did that come from? He considered it a moment and found himself comfortable with that assertion. “You heard me! And I believe she’s in love with me, too. Don’t look so surprised. We’ve been through a lot together. We may not have spoken the words yet, but they’re there, waiting for the right moment to be spoken. So, whatever happens today happens. I hope her love for me can withstand it. I know I love her regardless, and damn it, I’ll fight for her.”
Monica clutched her chest and smiled. “Stated like a man who believes he’s truly in love. My apologies, Raphael. I didn’t know you were able to separate your feelings for your wife from those for Serena. Given the nature of what might be going on here, I had assumed you would be as confused as she. Am I right?”
“Had you asked a few days ago, you would have been right. But things have changed. I’ve changed. I’m back, Monica. My powers are back. I feel like my old self again and can look more objectively at things. My feelings for Serena run true, and are only for Serena. I know that she’s not my wife. There are some distinct differences.”
“Such as?”
“Well, it may sound strange, but she has a different scent to her. Sirona’s essence is of the earth. But Serena, she smells of sweetness, of lilies of the valley. It reminds me of springtime and renewal. And Serena’s laugh is different. Sirona had a light and airy laugh, free of strife. But Serena’s comes from a deeper place, a place that truly appreciates the humor life gives us, however hard won. When she laughs, you feel as though it was a gift. And, too, there’s Serena’s tenacity, her determination, her perseverance to face whatever fate has in store for her. She’s a survivor. Sirona was immortal, a goddess for Christ’s sake. Until the day of her murder, she never had to fight for anything. She had other people do that for her. I could go on, Monica, but I think I’ve made my point loud and clear. So now that the tongue-lashing is over, let’s get down to work.”
“I do believe you’ve put me in my place, and very well, I might add. I hope you both come out of this unscathed. Unfortunately, I don’t see that happening. Again, my apologies. Now, on to the business at hand. We need to figure out once and for all if the soul within Serena is really your wife, and if so, what to do about it. So, sit quietly on the chair next to the couch and say nothing.”
He nodded as Monica walked passed him, back into the living room area. He followed quickly behind and sat down on the chair, not saying a word.
“Serena, my dear, are you ready to begin?” Monica asked lightly.
“Yes, I am. Tell me what to do, and I’m all yours.”
“Well first, Raphael, you’ll be in charge of the digital recorder. Anything she says can be analyzed later, if necessary.” Monica handed him the device. “Press record when I begin the session. Serena, I’m going to have you hold this heart rate monitor while we do this. Place your thumb on the sensor, and it will transmit your heart rate during the entire process. Sit back now, close your eyes, and relax. Listen to my voice as I help you get to a deep state of relaxation.”
With equipment ready, Monica began her litany of directions and soothing suggestions. In very little time, they saw Serena’s heart rate slow down considerably, and her breathing become even and deep.
“Serena, I’d like you to think back to a day, an experience that seems important to you. A time so unique and problematic that you think it could have opened the doorway to a past life. When that time comes to mind, I want you to tell me about it from your point of view today. Now, nothing can harm you. These experiences have already occurred. You will always be safe no matter what has happened in the past.” She waited for Serena to begin.
“It’s my birthday, two years ago. Jared’s come home from that crazy dig he signed up for. He brought me a gift, a statue of an ancient goddess. He’s so excited about giving it to me, but I give him grief, as usual. I accept it, but know something is fishy about it. I came to find out later, Jared had stolen this relic from the archeologist he was working for. I took it home with me, and when I lifted it out of its container and held it, I fell and blacked out.”
“Okay, now Serena. I want you to go back to that day for me. Go back to the point where you are holding the statue. What does the statue feel like? Tell me what you are experiencing.”
“It’s heavy, cold, and solid, but now it’s becoming warmer in my hands. I’m feeling dizzy. I’m spinning and falling. Everything is going black. Oh!”
“What is it?” Monica prodded.
“My head! My head hurts. What am I doing on the ground? Oh heavens, they’re still after me! I must get up and run. But my head! Why am I feeling this way? Why aren’t I healing? They’re coming for me!”
“Who’s coming for you?”
“I don’t know. I just wanted to be alone, for a little while, with no guards watching me. They’re always watching me. I must get to my temple. I must get to safety!” Serena began breathing heavily as though she were running. The monitor beeped like crazy.
“Are you there yet? Have you reached your temple?” Monica asked.
“Ahh! So close, so close! Get off of me, heathen! No!” Serena fell silent.
“Serena,
can you hear my voice? Serena, you are safe. Remember, nothing can harm you as you relive these memories.”
Serena abruptly started talking again. “I will not, cannot give you my gift of regeneration!” She paused, as though listening to someone else speak. “I am Sirona, Goddess of Healing, I cannot die. I am immortal.” Another pause. “I choose death, and when my soul returns, I shall have my life renewed while yours rots in the ground with maggots feasting on your flesh! Ahh!”
Serena screamed and flailed her hands about. The heart rate monitor flew clear across the room. Monica and Raphael watched as she tried grabbing at her right shoulder, wailing in utter agony.
Raphael could stand it no longer. Heedless of Monica’s initial directions, he scrambled to Serena’s side, unsure of what to do for her, yet wanting to be there all the same. Monica came to her side as well, visibly shaken by her behavior.
“No one has ever acted like this before, Raphael,” she swore.
Serena wore a tank top, easily showing what she grasped at. Raphael and Monica looked at her right shoulder and found a mark, a small reddish mark shaped like a scepter. He recognized it immediately as the mark of Sirona. Unbelievably, from the center of the mark, small droplets of blood appeared and began to trickle down her back.
“Oh my goodness!” Monica cried out. She quickly reached for her bag and took out a tissue to press on the wound and stop the flow. “I have to bring her out of this regression before the effects of whatever is happening to her leave lingering and possibly permanent consequences.”
But before she had a chance, Serena spoke again.
She reached out and whispered weakly, “Graim thu, Raphael, anam chara. I love you, Raphael, my soul mate.” A single tear fell from her eye as her hand dropped to the floor. He cradled her and rocked her as he’d done when he’d first found Sirona. He’d never known why she had been killed. Now he knew, he finally had closure, and his heart rent in two.
“Sirona, my dear Sirona! How could they have done this to you? How?” he cried out.
“Raphael! Look!” Monica yelled. She had lifted the tissue away, and the mark had completely disappeared, vanished without any lingering scars.
“What the hell is going on?” Gathering his wits and Serena in his arms, he got up and went over to the couch to sit. Not willing to release her for a minute, he kept her securely in his lap.
“I don’t know. I told you before, nothing like this has ever happened to any of my clients before. This is not how it’s supposed to go.” Monica tapped her cheeks with her hands, visibly shaken. “Is she breathing? Raphael, check if she’s breathing. And does she have a pulse?”
He checked, and she still breathed, although shallowly. “Her pulse is getting weaker. I’ve never seen anything similar to this before. What do we do? What do we do?”
“Serena, my dear, you must listen and hear my voice,” Monica asserted forcefully. “I want you to come back now to the present. Come back now and be part of the living. And when you come back, you will remember everything and feel healthy, calm, safe, and secure, knowing that nothing can harm you from the past. When I count to five, you will awaken. One, two, three, four, five.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Although she wanted to, she couldn’t respond… at first. Stuck in a vicious cycle of being caught and murdered, she had to reach out to the present to pull herself free. After a short while, she opened her eyes and took in a deep breath. She looked at Monica and Raphael.
“Serena, love…are you all right? Please, tell me you’re all right,” Raphael urged.
“Yes, please. Tell us you’re okay,” Monica added.
She lifted her hand and pointed at Raphael. “You…you’re Raphael. I called out for you and you never came. I…I was Sirona, the Goddess of Healing, and murdered for not giving my gift to those degenerates. I was…your wife!”
As awareness dawned on her, she scuttled out of Raphael’s arms and stood strong on her own two feet. She may have been petite, but at this moment she felt like the fiercest Amazon warrior. “She’s the one who’s been in my head. She’s the one who’s been making me crazy. She’s been in my head and my heart since I held the relic.”
Stalking around him like a predator and he, her prey, she continued vehemently. “I told you about the relic, Raphael, and you didn’t say a word. Not one! You acknowledged nothing. How could you let me go on not knowing? How could you sit there with me, night after night, nightmare after nightmare, and not tell me when I’d awaken, that during those times I would become Sirona, your wife? You’re nothing but a coward! That’s what you are! A scum-sucking coward!”
Raphael got up from the floor and extended his hands, palms up to her. Sweat dripped down his temples. “I know! I know! But Serena, you’ve got to understand….” She backed away immediately. He took a step forward. “Serena! Please, I didn’t know anything for sure. I was so confused. I kept quiet until I could be certain of my suspicions.” She backed up again.
“Don’t come near me. Don’t you touch me. You betrayed me! You betrayed your wife!” she shouted in near hysterics. “We made love, Raphael, many times. How many of those times were you really making love to her? Hmm? How many? Who’d you throw up against the wall and make love to in the hallway that first time? Was it her you tore the shirt from when we were out in the storm, perhaps? Or was it her every bloody time, and only me that really got screwed?” Angry tears came cascading down, and she let them fall.
“It’s not like that, Serena. You must believe me!” Raphael pleaded. “When I first met you, I didn’t know who you were beyond Jared’s sister. I felt a strong desire to be near you, to know you. And then, in the hospital, while you were sleeping, you had a nightmare and grabbed me. That’s when the memories of even having a wife came flooding back to me. And yes, you are the spitting image of Sirona, and in the beginning, it confused me. But very quickly, I could see the marked differences between you. And every time we made love, every time, Serena, it was you. Only you.” He took another step toward her.
“I said don’t come near me. Not another step!” Serena turned. “Monica, get me out of here, now. Take me home, to my office, or God, anywhere. Just get me the hell away from him!” She picked up her purse that was lying on the foyer table, and ran out the door to Monica’s car. Moments later, Monica knocked on her window and motioned for her to unlock the doors. They drove off in silence with Monica looking straight ahead and Serena weeping, head in her hands.
“I want my father,” she sobbed. “Please, take me to see my father. He’s at Sunset Nursing Home, down the street from my house. You can leave me there. I’ll walk home when I’m through visiting.”
“Sure thing, sweetie. Anything you need, you let me know, okay?” Monica squeezed Serena’s shoulder. “I’ve known you a long while now and seen you through some pretty dark days, but I must admit, this time beats them all.”
They rode the rest of the way in silence. Utter betrayal proved to be a devastating blow and clouded her mind. Visions of her past life regression served as a mocking reminder of who Raphael had made love to, and it certainly wasn’t her. When they finally reached the nursing home, Monica strained to retrieve a water bottle from behind her seat. She handed it to Serena. “Make sure you drink your water. It’s pretty warm out here today. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry that you have to go through this. But you’re not alone. Remember that!”
“I wish Jared had never brought me the damn relic. I wish I would have refused it and given it back. I wish, I wish…. God! I wish for too much!” She paused and took a breath, swiping her hands across her face. “Thank you, Monica. I know you’ve done the best you can to help me. I’ll be in touch. There’s gotta be a way to get this woman’s, or should I say goddess’s, soul out of my life.”
Unlocking the door and stepping out halfway, she hesitated, turned back around and gave Monica a quick kiss on the cheek and a hug. She got out of the car and walked into the nursing home.
***
/> Sunset Nursing Home, Your Loved Ones’ Home Away From Home. Serena walked under that banner enough times to know that this was one of the few nursing homes that actually lived by that creed. She was truly blessed her father could stay there for the remainder of his days. Not only did she live nearby, but the people who cared for the residents were more than mere workers; they were a surrogate family.
Although it had been a while since her last visit, she knew that her father’s care was excellent, and she needn’t worry. Guilt weighed heavy on her heart that she hadn’t been back to see him since the attacks. She could have insisted she be taken to see him, but had she really wanted him to see her all banged up? Not really. Even now, though she had completely healed, her mind felt like a train wreck. She shouldn’t be seeing him in this condition. It could disturb him. But her need and selfishness left everything else in the shadows.
She needed her father. Daddy, the man who used to make it all better. So Serena pulled herself together as she walked into the nursing home, signing in first at the front desk, made a left turn at the hallway, and entered Room 103. She found her father sitting in a wheelchair, positioned by the window. This particular one looked out on a small pond flanked by butterfly bushes and honeysuckles. A bird house on a pole stood as a refuge to all manner of bird. A park bench sat by the pond if one ventured outside. One rarely did though at this nursing home.
He looked the same as in days passed, wearing loose-fitting jogging pants and a comfortable T-shirt. His face seemed a little thinner than she remembered. But his silver and white hair had been recently trimmed, and his face, clean-shaven.
“Hi, Daddy,” Serena said softly. “It’s me, Serena. How are you feeling today? You seem good. Did Nurse Selma give you a haircut? It’s a little shorter.” She stooped to give him a kiss on the cheek and ruffled his hair.