Beloved Stranger: Gaian Series, Book 5
Page 15
“Gaia is a rich planet in a lot of ways, but it doesn’t have a lot of metals, so when some of the smaller planetoids in the solar system were discovered to be metal heavy, the idea of opening mines here became a priority. But getting people to work the mines was harder. That’s why we use them as prisons.”
“So mining is a kind of public service?”
“Yes, and once prisoners have served their time they can return to society. If they’d rather leave the mine earlier, they can, but then they would never be able to return to the planet.”
“And that means a lot to you?”
He turned towards her and touched her face, and for a moment Sonja found it hard to breathe. “It means almost everything to me,” he said. “There is only one thing I want as much.”
For some reason Sonja didn’t want to examine closely, she suddenly wanted to know more about this man. Roan wanted her as his wife. That was what he wanted as much as he did to return home. But she didn’t know much else about him, including why he was here in the first place.
“You said most criminals aren’t allowed into the marriage meets.”
Something changed in his eyes and they grew wary. “It depends. If the crime wasn’t a violent one, they can petition for an exemption and it will probably be granted.”
“But you said you wouldn’t be allowed into a meet,” she prompted.
The wariness disappeared and his eyes grew distant and sad. “I wouldn’t. My crime took place at a marriage meet so they’d never let me attend an official one back on the planet.” He took a deep breath. “You want to know what my crime was, don’t you?”
At the look in his eyes all she could do was nod dumbly.
Roan turned away for a moment and put his hand over his face. When he looked at her again, she saw the pain in his eyes. “I’m a murderer.”
Chapter Eighteen
“You killed someone? How?”
Roan was gratified by the look of disbelief on Sonja’s face, even though he knew it probably had more to do with his being Gaian than anything else. Gaians were known for nonviolent behavior, and he was glad she couldn’t believe he was capable of killing.
And he wished she was right, but he had been responsible for two people’s deaths.
Roan took a deep breath. “It was almost ten years ago. I was barely eighteen and legally too young to be going to a marriage meet. But I was big for my age, and looked older, so I went anyway.”
That had been the result of his working on the small fleet of fishing boats his parents owned. It had made him stronger than the normal teenager. It had also given him ideas he shouldn’t have had.
His differences made him look older as well. At school he’d been teased for being bigger and older-looking than the other boys. It had only seemed fair that he should take some advantage of his differences and marry early.
“You went to a marriage meet when you were eighteen?”
“I figured that if I was going to look like a man, I might as well have the advantages of one. I wanted a wife.”
Sonja continued to gape at him. “So you decided to get married. At eighteen.”
“Why is that so hard to believe? Even non-Gaian boys dream of having someone to love.”
She laughed. “Most boys don’t think of marriage for that purpose.”
Roan shrugged. “Most boys aren’t Gaian. To us marriage means adulthood and I thought of myself as an adult.” But he hadn’t been, and that had been the problem.
“That’s a common difficulty with teenagers.”
He liked the way she tried to rationalize away his mistake. “Unfortunately, what I did had serious consequences.”
“What happened?”
Roan went on with his story. “I couldn’t go to a marriage meet where they knew me, but there was a meet in a nearby village. I went with papers that weren’t mine and pretended to be old enough to be there.”
Sonja pushed herself up, leaning against her arm. “So what went wrong?”
“It was like what happened at our meet. A woman came towards me and I attached, but so did another man. I remember her turning towards him, away from me. She was going to choose him, I knew it. And I should have let it happen but somehow I couldn’t.” He paused, reliving how panicked he’d been. He remembered thinking his chance would soon be gone and he’d never have another.
Sonja’s face darkened. “You thought she was rejecting you.”
“I suppose. It was true she seemed to want him more. She didn’t know either of us, so choosing was a matter of heart. Who appealed to you more.”
“So what happened next?”
This was the hardest part to tell. “I struck him. He started to fight back, so I hit him again, but this time the woman tried to get between us and I hit her as well. That was an accident, but it didn’t matter. She went down, and the man pulled a knife. It’s illegal to bring a knife into a meet, but he had one all the same. He threatened me with it. I struggled with him, got hold of the knife and threw it away, and then I hit him, again and again. I was fighting for my life, or at least that’s what it seemed like to me. So I hit him until someone stunned me.”
He paused. “He died from the beating I gave him, and that was bad enough. What was worse was that when I’d tossed the knife, it had hit the woman in the chest, and she died as well.”
Roan shook his head. “When I woke, I was in a cell. They’d taken me there after the meet. It was discovered I was there with false papers and that I was too young to be there. That was the only thing that saved me from a life sentence here.
“Because I was so young, it was determined I wasn’t mature enough to be married. I didn’t have the mental or emotional maturity.”
Sonja had grown quiet as he’d told his story. Finally she spoke. “What do you think?”
“I think they were right. It was a mistake for me to have gone to a meet, regardless of how old I thought I was. It takes a man to recognize he’s not the best person for a woman and give her up if need be. When she turned from me, I should have accepted it, and I didn’t. I wasn’t old enough for a wife then. The tragedy is that two people paid the price for my immaturity.”
“But you didn’t bring the knife into the room. The other man was responsible as well.”
Roan sighed. “I know that. I’ve had years to come to terms with what happened that day. That’s part of why I’m here, Sonja, to understand what I did wrong. The truth is that regardless of the other man’s action, I shouldn’t have done what I did. I lost control and beat a man to death. I was careless with the knife, and a woman died.”
“So you stay in prison when you could easily escape.” She seemed to understand now.
“I needed to prove to myself and my family that I was better than the rash boy I’d been. I had to face my father and mother after that marriage meet and their disappointment. Their eldest son, responsible for two deaths and one a completely innocent woman. I swore to them I’d earn Gaian forgiveness. That meant that no matter how long my sentence here was I was going to serve it. I can’t leave here before I’ve paid the price.”
Sonja was silent for a long time. “Suppose I asked you to come with me when I leave?”
He hesitated. “I’ve wondered if you would ask, and I’ve wondered what I’d say. I want to say yes. Losing you would be the hardest price I could pay for what I did.”
“But you’d pay it to make up for your crime.”
Roan pulled himself up on one arm and stared down into his wife’s beautiful, dear face. She understood far too much about him now. He stroked her face and saw the tears in her eyes and knew they were for him as well as herself.
He knew her. She was his woman…and always would be, regardless of where she went after tomorrow. He pulled her closer in his arms.
“What kind of man would I be,” he said quietly, “if I didn’t?”
Chapter Nineteen
The commlink sounded while Sonja was showing Roan how to use his cooker to grill a th
ick steak. He went to answer it while she finished making the salad.
“That was Tron,” he said on his return. “He needs us to come over there tonight.”
“Sulla isn’t happy?” she guessed. “She doesn’t want to leave him.”
“He says he needs us to help persuade her.”
“And we’re going to help?”
Roan nodded grimly. “The man wants his wife and child safe. I can’t fault him for that.”
They sat and ate in silence, neither of them speaking of their own situation.
As with the last time they’d gone to Delta Residence, Roan first dressed in workman’s clothes while Sonja put on the skirt and blouse she’d brought with her.
Before they could leave, Allan was at the door. “I’ve put together a plan, Roan, but I need to discuss it with you.”
“We’re going over to Sonja’s sister’s place.”
The blond man smiled. “Delta Residence? Good. I’ll come with you. They’ll need to know what we’re doing as well.”
When they arrived, it was clear that Sulla had not taken her husband’s plan well at all. When she opened the door to their apartment, she had tears in her eyes, but she was clinging to her husband’s arm.
She sat heavily in one of the chairs, looking miserable. “He’s right. It’s too dangerous for a child here.”
Tron stood next to her. “I’ve got another two years to serve. At the rate this place is decaying, who knows how bad it could get? I just can’t take the chance something could happen to you or Alice.”
“I know. But there is so much to do if we’re leaving tomorrow.” Her gaze darted around the room. “I’ll have to pack. Her clothes, toys.”
“You won’t be able to bring much,” Roan warned. “The route we take out won’t allow for a lot of baggage, only what you can carry with you.”
Sulla looked ready to burst into fresh tears. “But there is so much more. I hate to leave it.”
“I’ll buy everything you can’t take and give you a credit chip for it. That way you can replace it later.”
A small smile appeared on Sulla’s face. “That’s very generous of you.”
Roan grinned at her. “Nothing generous about it. Good business for me. With all the children being born right now, baby stuff has become a prime commodity.”
Sonja rolled her eyes and elbowed Roan in the ribs. “You are really too much.”
He looked wounded. “But I’m the Dealer. Making deals is what I’m good at.” He plucked a toy animal from under the table and brandished it in the air. It was in the shape of a bird, and well loved from the wear on the surface paint.
“Look at this. It needs some fixing up, but a little bit of fresh paint and it will be good as new. Believe me, there is gold in this stuff.”
They laughed at Roan’s antics, and even Sulla smiled. “So what are we going to do?”
Allan pulled out his p-tab and connected into Tron and Sulla’s vid display. He brought up a map of the bubble complex and pointed to Zeta station. “Here is where we’re going to meet,” he began, and went on to explain his plan.
They would meet tomorrow at Zeta Station, Sulla and Tron with their little girl, Allan, Roan and Sonja. The marriage meet was scheduled for early evening, so Suna would be moved through the station about two hours earlier. It was the busiest time at the station, so devising a distraction and getting their sister to freedom should be easy.
Tron shook his head. “I’m not so sure it’s a good idea for us to go to Zeta. Not with Alice. It’s too dangerous if anything goes wrong. Could we meet someplace else?”
Roan thought for a moment and then smiled. “I know just the place.”
“I have to admit, it will be good to see everyone again,” Sulla said quietly. “Mother, Dad, Sasa and Sam. You went back, didn’t you? Are they all right?”
The two women had gone into the bedroom, Sonja supposedly to help Sulla pack. She sat on the bed while Sulla wandered around the room, selecting things she wanted to bring with her and putting them into the one small bag Roan had said she could take.
“They were when I saw them last. That was about a year ago, and I kept in touch when I was in the Outer Colonies. Since coming here, I haven’t been able to contact them.”
“I know.” Sulla put her hand on Sonja’s shoulder. “It was good of you to come for us.”
“I had to. I couldn’t leave you here.”
“It hasn’t been that bad.” Sulla sat down and gazed around the room, but Sonja knew it was the past she was staring at, not the furnishings. “In fact, it’s been pretty wonderful, overall. I’ve had a good life here with Tron.”
“You love him, don’t you?”
“Yes. And he loves me too. Otherwise he couldn’t send us away like this.” She stopped and turned to Sonja. “What about Roan? Do you love him?”
Sonja blinked at her and felt that strangeness she always seemed to get when she thought about Roan. That wasn’t love, was it?
“I’m not sure I’m capable of love.”
“You were.” Sulla’s lips quirked up into a small smile. “I remember years ago when you were with Bearn. You two were inseparable, and he was all you could talk about. I thought that’s why no one attached to you at the marriage meets we were forced into. You were too involved with him.”
Sonja stiffened at the mention of her old flame’s name. “I remember how I was about Bearn.”
Sulla’s smile faded. “I’m sorry, Sonja. What’s wrong? Didn’t you see him again?”
“Oh, I saw him. When I returned home, Bearn was the first person I looked for once I’d seen our family.”
Sulla sat on the bed next to her and put an arm around Sonja’s shoulders. “What happened?”
“Nothing much. He was there—and so was his wife.”
“His wife? So he didn’t wait for you?”
Sonja laughed, but the sound wasn’t pretty. “He pointed out that I’d been gone a year.”
Sulla sighed. “I guess that is a long time to wait, given that he didn’t know what happened to you.”
“It is a long time. But you see, he and his wife had a child, a little boy about two months old. So he hadn’t waited all that long. When I pointed that out, he simply said that he’d hadn’t expected to see me again ever, and that if I did return I wouldn’t be a virgin.” She laughed bitterly. “That was the real joke. At that point I still was. I’d been trying to stay faithful to him…”
Sulla hugged her sister. “I’m sorry, Sonja.”
“So anyway, the next time I was in port I went to a bar, got a little drunk and picked up a man to take care of that pesky little virginity problem.”
“So you’ve never been with a man who really valued you.”
“There have been a couple,” Sonja said quietly. She thought of Ryan, the pilot from her last ship who’d obviously cared deeply for her. They’d had sex once, the last night she’d seen him, but both of them had known at the time it wasn’t destined to go anywhere.
And then there was Roan… “There’ve been a few men who’ve meant more to me than a good time, but not many, and no one I’ve actually loved.”
“What about Roan?”
What about Roan? That was indeed the question. There was a difference in the way she reacted to him. At first she’d thought it was because she’d had to maintain a cover and needed to persuade him that she was willing to be his wife. But somewhere along the line the pretense had faded, and she had to admit he meant more to her than a way to get her sisters free.
“Roan knows that I have to leave.”
“And you think because of that he doesn’t love you?” Sulla laughed and shook her head knowingly. “He’s a Gaian, Sonja. I think they are born wanting to commit to someone. You can tell him a hundred times you aren’t able to belong to him, and he won’t accept it.”
“So why is he helping us?”
“Because you are his wife, and that means everything to him. Just as Tron would send Alice a
nd me to safety rather than risk our lives. He’d rather be alone than see us hurt. That’s why Roan is helping. It’s because you are everything to him.”
“No. He knows…”
Sulla shook her head again. “No, he doesn’t. You have to keep in mind that these men don’t think the same way we do. They don’t know how to do anything but commit to someone. As it happens, he’s committed to you.”
Shaken, Sonja turned to her sister. “He knows I’m leaving. What does he expect me to do?”
“I’m not sure he expects anything. Right now, he just wants to help. But don’t ever think that he doesn’t care about you, Sonja. He cares very deeply—he can’t help it.”
Sonja stared at her sister. “I asked him this evening if he could come with me.”
“And?”
“And he can’t. He promised his family to finish out his sentence. That’s in six months.”
Sulla shook her head. “That’s another thing, then. Gaians always keep their promises, especially when they make them to someone they love.”
“Like to his parents?”
“Or to you.” Sulla hugged Sonja close. “You have a good man in Roan, sis.”
“I know that. But what can I do about it?”
“I can’t tell you what to do, Sonja. But I can tell you that when the time comes, I think you’ll know.”
Chapter Twenty
Sonja was quiet on the way back to Beta Residence, as were Allan and Roan. Both men seemed to be deep in thought. They split up at the door to Roan’s apartment, Allan promising to return in the morning after he’d arranged for another unofficial day off his regular job. Having access to the prison computers made that easy.
That left Sonja alone with Roan and her questions. She waited until they were inside. “Roan, why are you helping us?”
He frowned. “What do you mean?”