Deceit

by KERRY BARNES

  Kara’s eyes widened at Vic’s conclusion.

  ‘Anyway, she sorted me out, so she is fine in my book. And ol’ Deni, the poor cow, I’ve just left her in the hospital wing. Mind you, I gave the nurse a fucking warning. I said she has shingles and not a bleedin’ headache. You should have seen the look on her face, as if I had just told her she had the plague.’ She pulled a roll-up from her scruffy bun and lit the end, puffing furiously. ‘So, where’s the baby? Muvver surely ain’t fit enough, the bleedin’ piss ’ead.’

  ‘Our Angie’s got Harper. Mind you,’ she said, with a penetrating stare at Kara, ‘she ain’t got her job no more.’

  ‘Oh yeah? She didn’t tea leaf anything, did she? She was on a right good earner. She reckons the woman gave her a monthly bonus to spoil herself an’ all,’ Vic said, with a quizzical frown.

  Julie was still looking at Kara, a grin forming across her face. ‘No, her employer burned the flaming house down. Didn’t ya, Posh?’

  Vic spun around with her hands to her mouth. ‘Oh, fuck me, it was you! Jesus, ya really did go to town. My Angie said ya didn’t leave a brick standing, not a blade of grass in the front garden. She reckons you used a bomb … I need to change your name to Bomber Bannon.’ She laughed at her own joke and pushed Kara almost off the bed. ‘Cor, small world, eh? So, Bomber, you’re a sly horse. I thought it was an accident. I didn’t know you were serious. Fucking bombed the house! Well, you have respect from me … But why, though?’

  For a moment, Kara felt comfort. Two women, a world apart from hers, were treating her now as one of their own. ‘My boyfriend went off with someone else and then asked me to get out of the house, our home that we had shared for years, so I thought, if he wants to move the bitch in, then he can sleep with her on a pile of ashes.’ Just as she spoke her innermost thoughts, she realised she was just like them. The only difference was that she portrayed more finesse, but it all boiled down to the same thing at the end of the day.

  ‘This neighbour, then. Was she shagging this fella of yours?’ asked Julie.

  With an inward groan, Kara replied, ‘No, that’s just a story that grew legs and ran. I didn’t know my neighbour was in the driveway, and the truth is, I didn’t know the boiler was going to explode. It all happened so fast. I doused the house and lit the match and headed for the back garden. That’s all I remember, really, apart from ending up in here.’

  There was silence. You could have heard a pin drop. Julie and Vic looked at this attractive and slim woman in front of them and just stared, totally dumbfounded by the precise and unemotional words leaving Posh’s mouth. It was left to Vic to speak up. ‘So, you’re a bit of a reckless fucker on the quiet, then?’

  A soft chortle left Kara’s mouth. ‘Well, I guess I must be.’

  ‘Right, I’m off to the canteen. I need to get a few bits. Jue, show Posh the ropes, will ya? She’s walking around like a tit in a trance.’ With that, Vic jumped from the bed and was gone.

  ‘You already know the ropes, I take it?’

  With a big huff, Julie replied, ‘Yeah, well, me ol’ man, the wanker, don’t work, ya see, and I needed a few bits for the babe, and I got caught choring ’em. They gave me three months. I already had a suspended, for nicking out of Waitrose. Some snooty cashier caught me, but it was the thump on her nose that got me inside. Anyway, I ain’t never done anything too serious like burning down a big posh house.’

  For the first time, Kara realised that inmates like Julie saw her crime as more serious than stealing and violence, and yet she hadn’t given it a second thought, assuming that hitting someone was far worse. Perhaps Julie was right, and the judge would come down hard on her. She’d been racked with guilt since the incident and would take whatever the judge decided to throw at her if the neighbour was seriously injured. She would deserve to suffer and yet she was also terrified of being locked away for years.

  ‘What’s up, Posh? You don’t ’alf look white.’

  ‘Just the thought of that innocent woman dying and it’s all my fault. I will never get out of here. I don’t deserve to either.’

  ‘So, what’s ya brief say? I mean, is she outta hospital yet?’

  She guessed Julie meant her lawyer. ‘Er, no, I don’t have a brief, or family, or a boyfriend anymore, so I haven’t a clue.’

  ‘You best speak to your personal officer and get a brief, sharpish. You will need all the bleedin’ help you can get. I’ll give ya the name of mine, if ya like. I’m seeing him on a legal visit tomorrow. Shall I put a word in? He does legal aid.’

  Kara nodded, feeling totally deflated. ‘If you wouldn’t mind, that’s so kind of you.’

  ‘No worries. I’m going down to the canteen. I need some sany towels. I came on early. All the bloody stress, I guess.’

  A sudden thought almost knocked Kara sideways. She hadn’t even considered her period. She was late, the sickness over the last few days having put everything else to the back of her mind. And what with worrying about herself and Justin and now being incarcerated in this absolute shit-hole, it was no wonder that her once logical and formidable brain was out of kilter.

  She did a mental recap of when she’d last had a period and an uneasy feeling gripped her stomach. It had been her last trip to Papua New Guinea where she’d thought she had contracted the lingering gastro bug that had been infecting the villagers. She could quite easily have thrown up the pill then. She calculated back the dates and sat there numb; she was possibly two or three months pregnant. How the hell could she have not known? She was medically trained. She’d put it down to sickness and stress, and she hadn’t thought a baby was on the menu yet – not this side of thirty anyway.

  Chapter 6

  Two weeks had passed. Lucy was keeping up her end of the bargain, as she saw it. Justin worked late most evenings and slept in the spare room. She cooked his evening meals and they joined in small talk – how he had got on at work and what she had been up to during the day. Then, believing they were getting somewhere, she decided to up her game. ‘So, Justin, I was thinking perhaps I should meet your family. We can break the news together.’

  He was just about to place a fork full of mashed potatoes in his mouth when he stopped and placed his cutlery down. Taking a deep breath, he declared, ‘I haven’t even told my mother about my break-up with Kara, let alone the house burning down. I think she needs to deal with one thing at a time, don’t you?’ His curt tone pricked her nerves.

  ‘Christ, Justin, she must already know. It was in the papers, and she will think it odd that you haven’t called.’

  ‘Look! My mother doesn’t read the news, except her local rag, and she knows if I’m busy, then I won’t call, but if she got wind of it, she would be knocking down my office door. Let me deal with one thing at a time, eh?’

  Lucy noticed the fine lines that had appeared around his eyes. Maybe it was the overhead light that highlighted his face, but he looked older, not so fresh. She couldn’t even say they were laughter lines because his expression of late was so sullen. Being patient was wearing thin and she had to batten down the urge to shake him. She wasn’t used to men denying her affection.

  ‘But surely your mother will be excited when you tell her she will be a grandmother?’

  His face tightened to an angry glare. ‘You what? Are you delusional?’

  Lucy forced her eyes to water. ‘But, it’s not fair, Justin. I feel like I’m being hidden away, like your dirty secret, when I should be embracing this pregnancy, showing off like other mothers-to-be, buying baby clothes, and enjoying the experience. It’s not my fault that Kara burned your house down and ended up in prison.’ She allowed a fat tear to fall. ‘I didn’t think you two were such a big deal because you wouldn’t have been in bed with me … twice. She wasn’t your wife, you never married her, she was just a girlfriend. If you really loved her that much, you wouldn’t have been seeking solace in another woman’s arms, my arms, would you?’ She didn’t raise her voice but kept her tone neutral.

/>   He shook his head. ‘Hello? I was drunk,’ he replied, coldly.

  ‘Maybe you were a little tipsy the first time, but you weren’t drunk the second time, when you came over to chat me up in the bar. If I remember rightly, Justin, you were stone-cold sober and moaning about Kara always being away and how you were getting bored with her. I would never have got involved with you, if I had thought for one moment you still had feelings for her. How do you think I feel? I thought we had something special. I know it was all very quick, but now we’re having a baby and looking forward to the future, it’s just not fair on me. Your suffering from guilt is affecting our baby. It’s not even born yet, and they say unborn babies pick up on things.’ She allowed another tear to fall, hoping that it would stir a reaction.

  For a moment, as Justin stared into her speckled amber eyes with that innocent expression, he saw Kara. It was so strange, he took a deep breath and blinked. He did miss Kara and would do anything to turn the clock back, but he couldn’t, and the sooner he accepted it, the quicker he could move on, and perhaps telling his mother would be the best thing.

  ‘All right, this weekend, I’ll drive to my mother’s and let her know what’s happening, and then, once she gets over the shock, I’ll take you over there to meet her.’

  Clasping her hands together, she tried to control her excitement. ‘Aw, thank you, Justin, I so want to meet her. I don’t have a mother. Well, I do, I just don’t know her, so it will be lovely to have your mum in my life and plan for the arrival of our precious child.’

  At that point, Justin realised that he knew very little about Lucy, and a sadness crept over him. Lucy didn’t have a mother. ‘You said a while ago you grew up in foster care, didn’t you? Didn’t you have a mother figure, then? Wasn’t there someone you cared about and who cared for you?’

  For a second, Lucy forgot she’d told him that she was brought up in foster care. ‘Oh, no, I went from home to home. No one really wanted me. They all wanted babies, and when you’re older, they want the money. I was worth a hundred pounds a week to the last foster carers.’ She stared at nothing, giving the impression she was somewhere in a dark place, recalling a distant horrible memory. In reality, though, she was plotting the next lie.

  ‘You never really had any family, then? That’s pretty sad, Lucy. I’m so sorry, love.’ He genuinely felt bad for her because he did know what it was like to have a loving mother, although not a father because his had run off. But, still, his mother more than made up for it, in love and kindness. He stretched his neck, trying to ease the strangling feeling. How was he going to tell his mum that Kara was in prison and his house was just a pile of ashes? And to top it all, he’d done the one thing his mother detested and that was to be unfaithful.

  He could hear her words ringing in his ears. ‘Son, I’m so proud of you. You have grown up to be a fine young man with morals and values and you never went off the rails. I feel I have done my job.’ He remembered it well because it was the day she’d given him her grandmother’s engagement ring for Kara. That was twelve weeks ago, but Kara was overseas for the second time, and so he’d hidden the ring in his sock drawer. He’d wanted the time to be perfect and had planned a trip to Italy in order to propose.

  He snapped out of his thoughts, when Lucy said, ‘So, yes, having your mother will be like having my own.’

  He so desperately wanted to go along with the notion that Lucy and his mum would be friends and the idea that a baby would make everything okay, but how could it? His mother loved Kara; she doted on her, in fact. She took over very quickly from Joan, who was eager to move to Australia, a long-term dream of hers. So, as soon as Kara mentioned that she would be moving in with him, Joan sold up and emigrated. Crippled with arthritis and suffering from extreme pain, she hoped the warmer climate would do her good. The truth was, Joan was very poorly and showing signs of dementia. Consequently, she would forget to call or even answer the phone, and so Kara resorted a lot to texting her.

  Christ, how would his mother, Mollie, take it all? They were already a family: Mollie, Kara, and him. He looked across the table at Lucy, who was still teary-eyed. Knowing he had to get the past out of his head, he said, ‘Hey, why don’t we go out tomorrow tonight for a meal and properly get to know each other?’

  Her face lit up. ‘Really, do you mean it?’

  ‘Yes, I think I need to move on. I can’t help Kara. She should never have done what she did. It was unnecessary, and you and I have a baby that needs looking after.’ He reached across and held her hand.

  * * *

  Lucy knew she had him: hook, line, and sinker. Now, she would sleep easy; she had finally cracked the nut.

  Justin left the next morning for work. He had slept in her bed, and although they didn’t have sex, he did hold her. Lucy didn’t tell him that she had a scan that very morning; she couldn’t reveal the birth date or he would have smelled a rat, so, instead, she went alone. The baby was five months not four. She paid for the photo of the scan and put it in a card ready for when he arrived home from work.

  * * *

  That evening, Justin arrived with a bunch of flowers, much to Lucy’s surprise.

  ‘There you go. I’ve booked a table at Desperados, a new Mexican restaurant.’ He didn’t want to go to any place that he’d been with Kara. It just didn’t seem right, and also, he wanted to remove any thoughts that could possibly darken his future, although he was well aware that it was an uphill struggle. Every time his mind wandered to Kara, he thought about the baby and how he would be a good father. Lucy was sweet; he hadn’t really noticed at first, but as the weeks passed, he was beginning to find her loving nature a real asset and could easily plant a kiss on her cheek or rub her now protruding belly.

  The restaurant was bright and full of exotic pictures, sombreros, and Latino music. Dressed like one of the bandits in the film Three Amigos, the waiter guided them to their table after which he reeled off the chef’s special menu.

  ‘This is wonderful, Justin, such a fun place. Have you been here before with …?’

  He smiled and shook his head. ‘No, never, I wouldn’t take you to the same places I took her. We need to have a fresh start, and with our baby on the way, I’m going to make some changes. The insurance company will be assigning a building company to rebuild the house. Everything has been approved, and so fingers crossed, we can move in, hopefully in six months. There is a big team of contractors who should have the place up and ready in record time.’

  The waiter returned with Lucy’s virgin cocktail in a huge glass topped with fancy decorations and sparklers. Lucy giggled. ‘Oh, I feel so spoilt.’

  Inside, though, she was irritated; this was not the expensive restaurant she was expecting, but still, she had to look impressed.

  ‘Here, Justin, take a look at your baby,’ she said, as she handed him the photo scan.

  His eyes widened. ‘Oh my God, is this really our baby?’

  The question was not taken in the way he meant it, and Lucy, for a second, forgot herself. ‘What do you mean?’

  Justin was staring at the alien-looking picture from the scan at the hospital, and his face changed from a look of surprise to one of wonderment. Gazing at her with a huge smile, he replied, ‘No, I mean, I never expected to see a photo so soon. When did you go to the hospital?’ He was still grinning like a Cheshire cat.

  Quickly, she had to regain her footing. ‘Oh, I went today. I thought I would surprise you.’

  Puzzled, he looked at her. ‘Why didn’t you ask me to come along? I would have gone with you.’

  The sparklers fizzled out. ‘I know you are busy at work, and I didn’t want to be a burden, Justin, and demand your attention. Anyway, our baby is perfect, so they said.’

  As Justin glanced from the menu he was studying to look up at Lucy, he noticed a look of pure horror on her face. Slowly, he turned around, following her gaze. A group of men had walked into the restaurant. They scanned the seating area, presumably looking for a table. Wearin
g dark grey suits, cutaway collar white shirts, and classy ties, they could have been pin-up models in a Hugo Boss catalogue. They clearly thought they looked the business too, with their cocky expressions. Justin looked back at Lucy who was getting up from her chair. He grabbed her hand. ‘Where are you going and who are they?’

  She shook herself free from him. ‘I need the ladies’,’ she whispered. But it was a bit late for that.

  ‘Well, hello, Lucy,’ came the distinctive East End voice from behind Justin, a voice that was deep and harsh. He didn’t need to turn around because the man in his forties with a sleekness about him was there by the side of the table. ‘And how are you, little Lucy Lou?’

  Justin was about to smile politely at the tall suited man, but pulled back from doing so, as he saw the sneer on the man’s face. There was a daunting air of menace that gave Justin a bitter taste in his mouth. The two other men, who looked like bouncers from a nightclub, gave Justin an ice-cold stare. Lucy was frozen to the spot.

  ‘What’s up, Lucy? Not got a hug for ya Uncle Carl, then?’

  Her eyes flicked from Justin to the two sidekicks and then back to Carl, who was still wearing his half-cocked smirk. Swallowing hard, she looked at him, as she tried to regain her composure, but her mind was in a spin. ‘Oh, come on, you’re not really my uncle, but anyway, I’m good, thank you.’

  ‘So, ain’t ya gonna introduce me to this nice young man ’ere?’

  Her hands shook so much, she had to grip the table. ‘Justin, this is Carl.’

  Getting to his feet, Justin held out his hand and received an almost bone-crushing handshake for his trouble. ‘Nice to meet ya, son, so …’ Carl looked down at Lucy’s bump, which was clearly on show in her tight tube dress. ‘A baby’s on its way, then, eh, Lucy Lou?’

  She nodded coolly and sat back down. She needed to regain the upper hand, before this evening went pear-shaped, but trying to dismiss Carl and his bruisers out of hand wouldn’t go down well at all. ‘Look, Carl, it’s nice to see you but maybe another time, yeah?’