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by J. A. Armstrong

  “What’s that?”

  “Riley.”

  “I’m not… Carol, we’re not…”

  Carol smiled. Not yet.

  ***

  Riley had been struggling to concentrate all day. She had tried unsuccessfully to avoid thinking about the milestones of this day. The only thing staying home seemed to accomplish was making her think about it more. She’d gone as far as to pull out her wedding album. It surprised her that she felt little sadness in flipping through the pages. The images made her laugh and smile. She did miss Robert. She missed his laugh, and the way he would wink at her from across a room. She missed his off-key singing in the car and the shower. She missed his arms around her and his lips on hers. Most of all, she missed his friendship. She massaged her temples. Owen was at a friend’s house. She was bored. Boredom led to thinking and that was the last thing that Riley wanted to do. She was relieved when her phone rang. An adult conversation—hell, any conversation would be welcome right now.

  Jerry. Well, he is an adult. Riley answered the call. “Hi, Jerry.”

  “Hi. Busy?”

  “Nope.”

  “Good. Well, not good, but, well, you know.”

  “What’s up?” Riley asked.

  “I was just wondering if you were busy, you know, later, not now, because you already said you’re not busy now.”

  Talking to Jerry sometimes made Riley dizzy. He was very sweet. Sweet. He is sweet. “Other than fixing Owen dinner and probably being forced to listen to talking dinosaurs or traveling through Storybook Village, I’m open.”

  “Oh… That sounds… Well, I hate to intrude on your time with Owen and dinosaurs.”

  “Jerry? What are you asking me?”

  “Oh, I was wondering if you might like to have dinner at Josiah’s. I have some friends staying in Essex. Jan, she and I have known each other since birth. She and her husband, Steve wanted to catch up.”

  “I don’t want to intrude.”

  “You wouldn’t be. It’s always a little awkward.”

  “Third wheel?” Riley guessed.

  “Who happened to date the second wheel all through high school.”

  “Ah… Sure. I’ll have to see if Marge is around. I’d call Andi, but… Well, Jake is home and…”

  “I get it. Just let me know. I’ll pick you up around six if it works for you.”

  “Pretty sure it will be fine. Plan on six. If something changes, I’ll let you know.”

  “Oh, great. Thanks, Riley.”

  “I’ll see you.” Riley set down the phone. Very sweet. Well, you get to be the fourth wheel for a change. Stepping up in the world, Riley. She chuckled.

  ***

  Andi slid the papers across the kitchen table to her husband. Jake Maguire looked at them and shook his head. “Why?”

  “It’s time, Jake.”

  “Time? Is this about Fallon?”

  “This is about us. It’s about me.”

  “And Fallon,” he guessed.

  “I’m not seeing Fallon anymore, not the way you mean.”

  Jake nodded. “She broke it off?”

  “Sign the papers, Jake.”

  “Why? Why now?”

  Andi sighed.

  “Because I want to move to Arizona? Why wouldn’t you want to go? What’s left here, Andi? The kids are gone most of the year. Don’t you think we deserve to make a change now?”

  We? A change? “What kind of change do you mean, Jake?”

  “What?”

  “It’s a simple question. What kind of change? Are you planning on retiring early?”

  “No…”

  “Are you planning on staying home—with me?”

  “Andi, you know that my job entails travel.”

  Andi nodded. “So, you’ll be keeping the same lifestyle only we’d have our house in Arizona.”

  “You make it sound like a punishment.”

  “Is it? Is it a punishment for me?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “This is my home, Jake. You aren’t interested in a home.”

  “That’s not fair,” he said.

  “Isn’t it? It’s the truth. You want to roam the world and explore all it has to offer,” she said.

  “I’m not the only one who’s had affairs.”

  “No.”

  Jake rubbed his face. He was frustrated and confused. “Twenty-six years of marriage, Andi. Why now?”

  Andi wasn’t sure how to answer that. Being with Fallon had reminded her that she could feel deeply for someone other than Jake Maguire. Ironically, watching Fallon and Riley fall in love had awakened her as well. Andi didn’t want to become a bitter old woman. She loved Jake. He’d been part of her life for most of it. He’d given her two children who continued to be the center of Andi’s world. She was no longer the center of any of theirs. She needed to figure out who Andi was—not Andi Maguire—Andi Sherman, the young woman she’d left behind so many years ago. What part of her still existed? What did Andi Sherman want from life? If she ever hoped to discover that, Andi needed to be alone. This was her home. Whiskey Springs was the place Andi needed and wanted to be. Perhaps Fallon was not her lover, she still loved Fallon. She loved Riley and Owen. She adored Ida and Carol. She even loved Pete and Dale. This was home—her home. That was the one thing Andi did know.

  “This is what I need, Jake. You don’t need me.”

  “How can you say that?”

  “For what?” Andi asked. “You’re gone more than you are here. You don’t have one mistress waiting for you; you’re like a sailor.” She chuckled. “A girl in every port.”

  “Don’t exaggerate.”

  Andi sighed. “I still love you.”

  “Tell me what you want, Andi and I’ll do it.”

  “This is what I want. You are who you are, Jake. That’s who you’ve always been. I don’t want to change you. I can’t follow the path you want to keep walking. I can’t.”

  Jake studied his wife’s expression. Andi had always been as intelligent and confident as she was stunning. He sighed heavily. He did love her. He’d always love her. He’d taken for granted that she would always be there. “You’re sure?”

  Andi nodded.

  Jake took a deep breath and signed the papers. He pushed them back to Andi. “I wish you’d reconsider this.”

  Andi squeezed his hand. “I wish I could.”

  ***

  Fallon drove across town to Tony’s Pizza to pick up dinner. Riley loved Tony’s pasta and meatballs. Fallon couldn’t blame her. There weren’t many choices for dining in Whiskey Springs. Tony’s hole in the wall pizza joint could easily deceive an unknowing visitor. People from across the area made the drive to Tony’s for pizza, grinders, salads, and pasta. That’s all Tony had made for the last twenty years. The worn façade of his building added charm in Fallon’s opinion. The food was amazing and inexpensive. Double win.

  She had devised the perfect plan. Riley had absently commented that she had no plans for the next few days. Fallon would arrive around six with dinner—cheese pizza for Owen. Okay, that might torture Riley slightly. But Owen was so cute when his face was covered with sauce, it was worth it. She’d offer to clean Owen up while Riley picked up from their dinner. They would read with Owen for a little while, and when he finally went to sleep, Fallon would suggest they have a glass of wine. Then she would give Riley her gifts and say, “happy birthday.” Riley deserved to be celebrated.

  Fallon had spent hours online searching for the perfect gift; something that sparkled and something that Riley would treasure. Riley often left her computer open when she had stayed with Fallon. Fallon had noticed one image that flashed across it repeatedly. She’d considered a million possibilities for the perfect gift. Riley was an avid reader. She read anything and everything she could get her hands on. Fallon would have thought that her friend would be tired of reading after editing books all day long. Riley explained that it was different. She loved to immerse herself in a bo
ok and escape into some foreign land with colorful characters. Fallon had seen her read everything from Harry Potter to Toni Morrison. Books lined the built-in shelves of Riley’s living room. Every novel by Austen and King, Rowling and Tolstoy adorned the shelves. One day, Fallon hoped the shelf would hold a volume by Riley Main. And, that is how she decided on the perfect gift.

  She turned the corner and started down the winding road that led to Riley’s house. A stupid grin curled her lips. Was she trying to “woo” Riley? She wanted to make Riley happy, to see Riley smile. And, yes, it was true she hoped somewhere beneath it all that one day she might just be rewarded with a sweet kiss—with Riley. Fallon took a deep breath as Riley’s house came into view. Who was that on the porch? Jerry? Oh, no. Riley? Riley was saying goodbye to Marge. Fallon stopped the car. She has a date. Jesus, Fallon, how stupid are you? It’s her birthday. Of course, she has a date. Fallon felt sick. She put the car in reverse and pulled away. What now?

  ***

  “I thought you said Fallon was spending the night with Riley?” Charlie asked Carol.

  Carol nearly groaned. Her eyes found Fallon across the room with a group of young women who had been in the bar several times in the last week. She wasn’t sure what was going on with Fallon. She’d gone out back and found Fallon tossing a bag and a pizza box in the dumpster. Fallon’s expression told her to leave it be. Next thing she knew, Fallon was behind the bar pouring herself a beer. Moments later, the three women had walked in. Fallon had been in the corner with them ever since. That has no good place to go.

  “I’m not sure what happened,” Carol told her fiancé. One of the women had been eyeing Fallon for days. Carol had noticed it. Fallon had seemed oblivious to the attention. That was rare. Even if Fallon chose not to act on a woman’s advances, she always noticed them. Carol sighed. Fallon’s moods had been fluctuating like tides for days. One minute she would seem upbeat and positive, the next she was sullen, and before you could blink, Fallon would snap over some trivial bit of information. It was wholly unlike Fallon. Part of it, Carol was certain, stemmed from the relationship she had with Andi ending. Andi hadn’t been in the pub since. Carol hadn’t needed to ask why. She’d gotten a call from Andi. Andi knew Fallon better than anyone except Ida, even Carol, and Carol had a close friendship with her boss. Andi’s voice held both concern and sorrow.

  Fallon’s feelings for Riley had been apparent to Carol for months. At Owen’s birthday party, she’d found herself wondering when they might be headed to the altar. Fallon had been almost giddy about her plans for the evening. Something had happened. As much as Carol dreaded Fallon’s wrath, she thought it was time to find out. It wasn’t the cute, flirtatious blonde hanging on Fallon’s every move that Carol sought to save Fallon from; it was herself.

  “Do me a favor?” Carol asked Charlie.

  “Sure.”

  “Watch the bar for a minute?”

  “Where are you going?”

  Probably to my death or the unemployment line. “I’m going in.”

  “You’re kidding,” Fallon laughed. “You’re renting the Bath’s cabins at the pond?”

  “Yeah, why?”

  Fallon shook her head. “Oh, nothing.” She wondered what Dora and Dick Bath might think if they knew lesbians were enjoying the fruits of their labor. She sniggered. If the night went the way she expected, Fallon would be enjoying some fruit in the Bath’s cabin. That brought her a degree of sick satisfaction.

  “Hey,” Carol tugged on Fallon’s arm.

  “Oh, hey. Carol. This is Deb, Trish, and Aubrey.”

  “Hi,” Carol greeted the trio evenly.

  “They’re renting those two cabins the Bath’s own down at Morton Pond.”

  “Oh? Nice,” Carol said a bit dismissively. She wanted to roll her eyes at the way Aubrey’s hand not so subtly fingered Fallon’s arm. Ugh. You aren’t in the same league as Andi or Riley. “Can I borrow you for just a minute?” Carol requested.

  “Sure,” Fallon said. “I’ll be right back,” she told Aubrey.

  Aubrey stretched to place her lips in front of Fallon’s. “I certainly hope so.”

  Carol thought she might wretch. I can’t believe that works. She walked a few feet to the side door of the pub and stepped outside.

  Fallon followed her friend. “What’s up?” Fallon asked.

  “I don’t know; you tell me.”

  “Tell you what?”

  “What’s going on with you?” Carol asked.

  “I was enjoying a beer.”

  Carol stared at Fallon. “Why aren’t you at Riley’s?”

  Fallon’s face contorted. “She’s busy.”

  “She’s busy?”

  “Yeah. You know—busy.”

  “Uh-huh. What did she say when you showed up?”

  Fallon was growing anxious. Talking about her trip to Riley’s unsettled her for reasons she had no desire to explore with Carol or anyone else. There were things she was eager to explore—things called Aubrey. “She didn’t say anything.”

  “What?”

  “I didn’t talk to her.”

  “Lost me.”

  “I pulled up; she was walking out with Jerry.”

  “Jerry? Jerry Walker?”

  Fallon made no comment.

  “So, you just left?”

  “I dropped some things off on the porch after they were gone.”

  “So, she went out; so what?”

  “Exactly. It’s her life.”

  Carol sighed. “You know, Fallon, you really can be thick.”

  “What the fuck does that mean?”

  “If you’re so crazy about Riley, maybe you should tell her.”

  “I’m sure Jerry has that covered. Is there anything else?”

  Carol took a step toward the door. “You know; if she means that little to you that you’ll just walk away because she happens to spend time with someone else, maybe she’d be better off with Jerry.” She shook her head. “Go play with Aubrey.”

  “I will.”

  Carol shook her head again. Sometimes, Fallon—sometimes.

  ***

  “I’m glad you were free,” Jerry said.

  “I’m glad you called.”

  “Really?”

  Riley grinned. “Yes, really. I needed to get out.”

  “I can’t believe that Charlie and Carol set a date for the wedding already.”

  “I can.”

  “Really?”

  Jerry certainly like the word really. Not like Fallon’s kerfuffle. Fallon seemed to have fallen in love with the word kerfuffle. She would use it whenever the opportunity presented itself. Riley had asked why she had so much affection for the word.

  “I don’t know,” Fallon told her. “I just like the way it sounds—like I’m smart.”

  Riley chuckled. As if Fallon wasn’t intelligent. She suspected Fallon found the word fun to say. “You know, there are a plethora of under-utilized words, Fallon.”

  “Ohh, could there be a plethora of kerfuffles, though?”

  “I don’t think so.”

  Fallon huffed. “That would be fun to say.”

  “Riley?”

  “What?”

  “The wedding?”

  “Oh, yeah.” That could turn into a kerfuffle. She chuckled.

  “Did that wine go to your head?” Jerry asked as he pulled into Riley’s driveway.

  “No. I’m sorry, Jerry. I was just thinking about something.”

  “It’s okay. Listen, I had a nice time.”

  Riley smiled. Everything about Jerry was nice. Electric? No. Nice? Very. “Me too,” she said.

  He leaned over and placed a light kiss on Riley’s lips.

  Riley offered him another smile. Nice. Just—nice. “Thanks for dinner.”

  “I’ll call you.”

  “Sounds good,” Riley said as she stepped out of the car. Oh, Riley… He is a very nice man. What is wrong with that? She chuckled. I think I’d prefer a kerfuffle.


  ***

  Fallon followed Aubrey into the cabin. Before she could speak, Aubrey’s mouth claimed hers with a desperate kiss. Fallon welcomed it. Fallon welcomed anything that might have the power to banish images of Riley Main. Who needed love? Where did that lead? It led directly to loneliness, that’s where it led. How many lessons did a person need? She shed her jacket and tossed it carelessly aside. Aubrey’s hands were everywhere all at once. Fallon immersed herself in the sensation that was pure, unapologetic lust. She wasn’t seeking tenderness. She intended to touch every inch of the woman kissing her. She’d tear away the cloth barriers between them if need be.

  “Mmm.” Aubrey moaned into Fallon’s mouth. She’d been watching Fallon for days. She’d come back to her cabin and she would imagine Fallon’s lips covering her body, imagine her hands covering Fallon’s breasts. Her fingers would play in time with the images. She wanted Fallon Foster. She wanted Fallon Foster to throw her up against the wall and take what she wanted. She would not be disappointed.

  Fallon practically ripped the blouse from Aubrey’s body. It got thrown into a growing heap of clothing. Aubrey reached for Fallon. Fallon grabbed her hands and pressed her against the wall, holding Aubrey’s hands over her head. Her mouth crashed into Aubrey’s demanding entry. Her teeth toyed with Aubrey’s lower lip before descending to her neck and finally to a soft pink nipple.

  “Fuck!” Aubrey called out.

  Fallon sucked and nipped at the pink flesh until Aubrey strained against her. She pressed her full weight against the younger woman. “I’m going to make you come like you never have.”

  Warmth flooded Aubrey’s veins and pooled between her legs. Yes. That’s what she wanted.

  Fallon unbuttoned Aubrey’s jeans and lowered them. She wasted no time. Her fingers found the wet, eager softness she expected. She played for a moment, teasing the woman against her, circling and toying.

  “Fuck, Fallon…”

  “Fuck?” Fallon asked. “Is that what you want? You want me to fuck you right now?”

  “Yes. Fuck yes.”

  Fallon’s fingers thrust into her lover forcefully.