“I bet you get an A on that paper.” She said breaking me from my thoughts.
“He’d be stupid not to give me an A.”
“Absolutely.” She nodded her head in agreement. Her smile was bright and eyes so engaging. They were a dark blue, almost midnight color. But at times, when she would turn her head just right I could see a tiny hint of green. They were penetrating and gorgeous. There was so much light inside of her. It shined bright through her eyes. She was exactly what happiness would look like, if it had a face.
I watched her as she yawned and leaned her body back against the headboard.
“I should get going.”
“Okay.” She said. “I’ll walk you out.”
I grabbed my bag off the floor and followed her down the stairs to the front door.
“I had a nice time Jackson.” She admitted a little sheepishly.
“You know what?” I slid past her and stepped on to the porch. “I did too. I really did.” I smiled. I didn’t tell her what I was really thinking. If she saw right through my devilish grin, she never said. I couldn’t help myself. Despite her lack of know how, she was mesmerizing. I wanted to be next to her. I wanted to touch her. It was probably best that I was leaving, otherwise I would find some way to persuade her to do dirty things that her innocent mind knew nothing about.
“Really.” She cocked her head to the side. “Who knew that I could be so much fun?” Her voice was high pitched. She was clearly mocking me.
“Wow, I didn’t know that you were funny too.” I joked back.
She shook her head. “Goodnight Jackson. Let me know how you do on the paper.”
“I will.” I quickly kissed her cheek before she realized what I was doing, and before she had the chance to slam the door shut in my face. “Thank you.” I said waving goodbye and walking away.
I wanted so badly to kick up my heels as I walked to my car, because the look on her face was priceless. She didn’t expect me to do that. Hell, I didn’t even expect it. It was just my way of saying thank you.
Okay, not really. Truthfully I’d wanted to do that all night, but knew she’d probably freak out. Not only were my hands drawn to her, so were my lips. When I turned around to steal one last glance at her my smile widened.
She stood there in the door jam with her hand against the cheek where I kissed her. She was staring straight at me. I had shocked the hell out of her. Her face was blank. Shit. Maybe I’d frightened her. That wasn’t what I was trying to do.
I chanced a wave, and let out my breath when she waved back with a tiny smile on her face.
Victory was mine.
Taking a seat behind the wheel, I drove off with the biggest smile on my face.
11
Grace
Holy crap.
I locked the door behind me as I ran to my room as quickly as I could. My cheek was still warm or maybe it was my blood pressure. I didn’t know. All I knew was that he kissed me.
He freaking kissed me.
Did I like it?
Was I angry?
Would I let him do it again?
Yes, no, and definitely yes.
I wanted to scream. It was my first kiss. Well, not really kiss because his lips never touched mine. But I didn’t care. I was counting it.
There was no way I could sleep after that.
First I wanted to write about it, and then I wanted to tell to Darcy.
I bounced around the room and grabbed my poetry book from my dresser. My heart was still racing and I’d never felt this excited about anything.
Opening the book, I turned to the first blank page and started writing.
Jackson
My face was heated. My soul was touched.
His kiss was tender, soft, and warm.
Sometimes the most unexpected things brought us happiness.
I’d never met anyone like him. I’d never known they existed.
He was cocky, blunt, and full of life.
He made me look at things differently in an unusual light.
I didn’t know him. I barely knew myself.
I only knew that I liked his company, enjoyed his laugh, and loved that kiss.
Jackson made me feel different, but in a good way.
What would I take away from this? What would I gain?
Absolutely nothing.
Absolutely everything.
Today was my first kiss.
His name was Jackson.
I’d thank him one day.
Thank him for my first act of freedom.
Thank him for not being scared.
Thank him for stealing that kiss.
Thank him for trusting me.
Thank him for asking questions.
Thank him for listening as I spoke.
Thank him for being himself.
If I never saw him again, that would be okay.
I’d never forget today.
Jackson.
I sighed as I closed the book.
“Oh world.” I said. “Just try taking this smile off my face. I dare you.”
I sprang down the stairs and ran straight into Darcy’s room. She patted the bed and I jumped onto it excitedly. I spent the next hour replaying the entire night. She listened to my every word and only commented a few times with the occasional “Oh, or he had the cutest smile, or I’m so happy for you.”
I realized that these were probably the talks that thirteen-year-old girls had with their best friends. It couldn’t possibly be the conversation between an eighteen-year-old and her aunt.
Still. I didn’t care. My life was only just beginning. Other girls were probably miles ahead of me in their lives, but I wasn’t other girl’s. And I didn’t care what anyone thought of me. This was freedom at its best.
I am Free!”
It was Saturday. I didn’t have to work and Aunt Darcy was spending the day with Paul and told me to do whatever I wanted. I was content with spending hours in front of the television.
Literally, it was hours.
I watched three movies and some crazy show where they took some old run down house and remodeled it to sale. It was amazing. Seriously. It only took them like a week to rebuild an entire house.
About halfway through my bag of potato chips and the second episode of the house makeover show, I heard someone knock on the door. My heart dropped to my butt. Instantly I thought maybe it would be my father, and I started to have a mini panic attack. I tiptoed around the couch as if the person standing outside the door might hear me. Not likely, but I couldn’t help freaking out.
“Get a grip Grace.” I said to myself. It couldn’t be my father. He had no idea where I was. Surely he wouldn’t come looking for me. Just as I stepped closer to the door, whoever was behind it knocked again. Then a voice yelled out.
“Grace, come on open up. It’s me Kennedy.” She called out.
I let out the biggest sigh ever as I swung open the door.
“Hey,” I smiled. “What are you doing here?” I asked. I looked at her questionably. “And how’d you know where I lived?”
She pointed her thumb over her shoulder, and when I peeked around I saw Jackson sitting in the driver’s seat of his car. He shot me a wave.
I smiled and waved back.
When I looked back at Kennedy, I still had a blank look on my face. Her sheepish grin made me think she was up to something. She was the mischievous sort.
“Well?” I asked.
“I’m sorry to surprise you, but I didn’t have your number. I was hoping that we could hang out for a little while. My car will be ready to pick up in a few hours and Jackson is supposed to take me to get it. I was really bored sitting at home.”
“Don’t you have other friends?” The words slipped from my mouth before I had a chance to realize what I was saying. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Her eyes grew wide, and her mouth dropped open.
“That. Is. Not. What. I. Meant.” I paused between each word. “I mean. Ugh,” I sighed. I just cou
ldn’t understand why she’d want to hang out with me. I knew she had other friends. She’d be just as bored with me as she would be if she were home.
She laughed and patted my shoulder. “I knew what you meant. Do you want to hang out?”
“Sure,” I replied with a smile, and opened the door wider. I didn’t ask what hanging out would require, and hoped that she secretly loved home makeover shows.
She waved at Jackson and I watched as he pulled away from the curb.
Closing the door behind us, I walked us into the living room.
“My aunt isn’t home. It’s just me and the T.V.” I said.
She made herself comfortable on the couch, pulling her legs up close to her. I sat down next to her and couldn’t help admiring the bright red polish on her toes. I loved it.
“Have you ever?” She looked at me and then stretched her legs out to my lap letting out a groan. “Have you ever painted your toes?” She asked obviously catching me staring at them.
“No.” I shook my head.
“Want to?” She asked excitedly, a little too excitedly actually. She was extra bubbly at times. I was a fairly happy person myself, but her enthusiasm made things brighter, more cheerful.
“I don’t have any.”
“That’s okay I brought mine.” She reached down beside the couch and pulled her purse onto her lap, dumping the contents out everywhere.
“Wow.” I laughed. “Is there anything you don’t have in there?”
“You can never be too prepared.” She batted her dark coated lashes at me.
She dug around until she found what she was looking for.
“Here it is.” She held up the bottle of red polish. She moved to sit in front of me on the table and patted her legs for me to give her my feet.
The only color polish I had ever used was clear. My mother never bought colored polish, and I never asked.
With a little too much enthusiasm, I swung my legs up to her lap.
A giggle escaped her lips, and I couldn’t contain mine.
“Why do I get the feeling that you’ve never experienced An Affair in Red Square?” Her voice was thick with a British accent.
“What?” I looked at her funny.
“It’s the name of the polish Grace.” She dropped her head back down an opened the bottle, still laughing. “Seriously though, this will feel like an act of rebellion, right?”
“A little.” I replied sheepishly. It’d be fun though.
“Can I ask you something?”
I could only imagine what would come out of her mouth next. Was I prepared for it? Did I want to talk about my home life and my past? I nodded my head. I wouldn’t give her all of the crappy details, but I’ve only ever been honest. So I’d tell her whatever she wanted to know.
“What was your home life like in Oklahoma? On our first day at work you told me that you just wanted to experience a little bit of freedom. Was life at home bad?” She asked as she brushed the red polish along my big toe.
She must have sensed my nervousness. My whole body was tense. I was replaying my responses over and over in my head. I didn’t want to tell her everything, just enough to suffice her.
She stopped what she was doing and looked up at me. “I’m sorry Grace. If you don’t want to talk about it, I understand.”
“No, no, it’s fine.” I leaned back a little on the couch. “My life wasn’t bad all the time. It was different; unlike yours I’m sure. I didn’t realize how different until I came here. I guess you could say it was very controlled. My dad was strict.”
“How strict?” She asked.
“Well,” I said afraid to say the rest. If she thought I was innocent, she really had no idea how much. I took a deep breath before replying. “No pants, no bathing suits, no makeup, no cell phone, no internet except for the main computer that my mom schooled me on, but I wasn’t allowed to use it, no public school, no boyfriends until after I turned eighteen, no friends outside of our close nit circle which included one girl, and the list goes on and on. We lived on a farm so my days consisted of chores at six a.m. and bed by 8 p.m.”
“Wait a minute.” She drawled out her words. “Back up. No boyfriends.” She exclaimed.
“Nope.” I popped the P.
“So you have never had a boyfriend?” Her eyes grew wide as she waited for my answer.
I laughed. “No, no boyfriend. And before you ask, that also means all of the things that go along with it. I haven’t dated, held hands, kissed…” I trailed off because I couldn’t possibly mention the fact that I had just experienced my first kiss with her brother. I smiled at the thought of it.
“That is sad Grace. You are seriously deprived.” Her face fell.
“No I’m not.” A small smile crept up on my lips. “So I’m getting a little bit of a late start.” I shrugged. “I don’t mind. There were very few boys within a twenty-mile radius of my house. I never even cared to date. Besides, I learned a long time ago, that if you never had things then you never missed them. You know?” I explained.
She continued polishing my toes and I didn’t say anything for a while. It was the first time that I ever wondered what someone was thinking about me.
“Done.” She smiled closing up the bottle of nail polish.
I eyed my toes and wiggled them around. “I love it.” I beamed. It was another piece of freedom that I could cross off my list. “Thank you.”
Kennedy eyes lit up. “You’re welcome. And thanks for sharing all that personal stuff with me. I’m glad you trust me with it.”
“We’re friends.” I urged.
“Yes we are.” She agreed. “I would never make fun of who you are Grace. I want you to know that. It’s okay that you aren’t as experienced as most girls, because then you wouldn’t be Grace.”
At that moment, I realized that she was the closest friend I’d ever had. I could trust her with anything. I wanted her to hang around, because at this rate we’d be best friends soon. I wanted a best friend, more than anything.
I looked over my toes again. I was in love with the deep red polish that covered them, and she was right when she said it would be rebellious. It felt down right illegal.
“You want something to eat?” I asked.
“Sure, so long as it is full of sugar.”
We walked into the kitchen and raided the cabinets for the sweets. Then we went back into the living room and binged out. I loved every minute of it.
The hours passed by so quickly and she said that Jackson was on his way to pick her up. Just the sound of his name peeked my interest.
“Oh my God,” she sat up quickly. “I have the best idea ever.”
I bit down on my lip and peered up at her. I had a feeling this was going to be bad. Of course it was going to be bad. This was Kennedy after all.
“Come with me and my friends tonight.” It was more of a statement than a question.
I was already shaking my head as if it were a bad idea. “I don’t think so.” I started to oppose.
“Grace,” she wined. “You’ll have so much fun and you’ll be with me all night.”
“Where are you going?” I sighed. Her winey voice super annoying, and I would almost do anything to get her to zip it up.
“We are going to a local club that we always hang out at called The Edge.” She said and before I could say HECK NO, she interjected. “Hear me out.” Her hands rested on my shoulders.
I fought to keep from rolling my eyes at her. Which was normally something she would do. She was rubbing off on me.
“Everybody from school goes to this club. You only have to be eighteen. Nothing bad ever happens. Plus you will get to hang out with me. It’ll be fun. I swear. Please.” She pouted her lip.
The thought of a club scared me a little. I mean I didn’t really know what to expect. Whether it would be dangerous or not? Staring at her big lip that stuck out far from her face was killing me. How her parents ever told her no was beyond me.
You’re not at home Gr
ace. This is your time to experience life. Quit being such a scaredy pants. The internal battle in my head was going strong.
“Fine. I’ll go. But if it’s too crazy for me, then I’m going home.”
“Eeeep.” She squealed wrapping her arms around me in a hug. One of those things that still felt weird and uncomfortable to me. There was a knock on the door and I knew this time that it would be Jackson. “I’ll be here at 8:30 to pick you up.”
“Oh Kennedy,” I called after her.
“Yeah.”
“I’m dressing like I always do.” I said honestly.
“I know.” The smile stretched widely across her face. “See you later.”
“See ya.” I waved.
I threw myself roughly down on the couch and crossed my arm over my face.
“What am I getting myself into?”
12
Jackson
The club wasn’t too crowded yet, as we walked in and found our table. Holly was attached at my hip and had been since I picked her up. I didn’t mind too much, because I loved the way her body felt pressed up against mine.
I’d been a little distracted all day after seeing Grace wave to me from her porch. How could such an innocent girl have such an effect on me? It was the question that I’d asked myself time and time again. Yet, I had no answer for it.
The music started from the back of the bar and I pulled Holly in front of me to stand between my legs. Jeremy had already left us as he walked over to the bar to get our drinks. I wanted something warm that would burn as I drank it down.
Jeremy brought back my drink, and we sat there cutting up as the music played. More and more people started piling in through the door. It didn’t take long before the place was packed. The weekend crowd was always the biggest. It was really the only place that anyone hung out, at least any of my friends. Nearly all of the guys from the team that I hung out with were hanging out by our table. Girls were everywhere seeking their attention. A part of me wished that I were single again, so that I didn’t have to worry about appeasing one girl. I could do what I wanted. I’d at least put more effort into going after the girl that I couldn’t stop thinking about. Or would I? Another part of me was glad that Holly was constant in my life. I didn’t have to worry about my game, or which hoe I’d take home at the end of that night. It was always her.
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