by Soranna O.
He made me laugh every time we were together and that means a lot to me.
Before I knew it, I realized that I was starting to have feelings for Markus.
My dilemma was that I also still loved Dilan.
My plan for revenge was going horrible bad.
I could end up losing both of them and that scared me more than anything.
I talked to my friend Mirabelle about my dilemma because I knew she would be the only other woman who could understand my situation.
Mirabelle was in a very special relationship with two men.
I was in a relationship with two men too but the difference was that she was not cheating.
Both her men knew about each other and they were fine with it.
The more I talked to Mirabelle, the more I wanted to be with both my men in an open relationship.
But would they ever agree to this or was I just losing my mind?
All I could do was hope.
Maybe they loved me too much to give up on me.
Maybe the thought of sharing me was better than losing me.
I guess I will have to wait and see…
"Why don't you just leave him?"
Markus asked me one day.
"You know I can't do that, Markus." I said. "We talked about this, I love him."
"What about me? Do you love me?"
Markus asked with sadness in his voice.
I touched his face with the tip of my fingers and answered:
"You know I do, Markus. You mean so much to me but so does Dilan."
"You can't have us both, at some point you will have to choose."
"But why…"
"Why what?"
"Why do I have to choose? Why can't I have you both?"
For a moment Markus was quiet, then he said,
"What are you saying? Do you want to have two boyfriends? I am sure Dilan would never agree."
"But what about you? Would you agree?"
I asked surprised by his answer.
"If this is the only way to have you…yes, I would."
"I will talk to Dilan. But I am so happy that you're on board with this. I want you both in my life."
Chapter 5
I have never been more nervous in my life.
This was the moment of truth.
I had to come clean with Dilan and tell him that he is not the only man in my life.
By now I can feel how much Dilan loves me and I know that what I have to tell him will hurt him.
Strangely enough, seeing him in pain doesn’t make me happy anymore.
I don't want revenge anymore.
I just want to be happy with Dilan…. And with Markus.
I've decided to break the news tonight after dinner.
I cooked his favorite meal and then I told him that there was someone else in my life.
I was shocked to see he actually had tears in his eyes.
He thought I was saying goodbye to him.
That I was leaving him for this other man.
When I told him that in fact I wasn’t leaving him and that I wanted to have both of them in my life, Dilan was actually relieved.
He said that he will try it for a while and see if he can handle sharing me with another man.
He already liked Markus and at least that was a good thing.
And this is how my new reverse harem lifestyle had started.
Her Man, My Lover
As a young girl, I always thought I would find my prince and marry him one day.
In my story there was no wife.
My price wasn’t already married when I met him.
Unfortunately, life is not a story you tell little girls and my prince is not mine at all.
I only get to borrow him from time to time, whenever he gets bored of what he has at home.
Sometimes I get angry but I know I am the only one to blame for the situation I am in.
I have tried many times to forget about him but it's like I am addicted.
My addiction has a name: Markus.
Markus keeps promising that we will end up together.
He even gave me a ring but I told him I will not wear it until he is a free man.
For now, I keep the ring in my nightstand and I look at it whenever I feel sad.
I am not sure if she feels anything.
If she knows that her man has another woman on the side.
As a woman, I guess it's impossible not to know.
I wonder sometimes, does she even care?
Even though I am technically the other woman, I am very jealous knowing he is home with her.
I know her name but I don't want to say it out loud because this would only make her more real.
I have no right to be jealous and yet I am.
But now I feel like I've reached my limit.
Markus was supposed to come by today because it's my birthday and we have plans to go out for a romantic dinner.
It's not the first time he changed his plans and left me waiting, but today was important to me.
I thought that since it's my birthday, there was no way he wouldn’t show up.
But all I got was a lousy happy birthday text and an apology.
Happy Birthday, my love! I am so sorry, but I can't come today. Something came up at home. Call you later.
He did call later that day but I didn’t answer.
That’s something new for me because I always answer his calls on the first ring.
Not this time.
I let it ring because I couldn’t stand to hear his voice anymore.
I spent the day in bed, crying and wondering what I did with my life.
Here I was, 30 years old and no husband, no kids.
I have spent the last 3 years of my life being the other woman but enough is enough.
I have to change something now before it's too late.
Maybe I still have a chance at love.
Maybe I can still find someone to love me and be willing to marry me.
I almost forgot how it feels to be the only woman in a man's life.
How it feels not to be eaten up by jealousy.
So, the next day I got online and made myself a nice online dating profile.
I used my most recent photos because in this new future relationship I want to do everything right.
I know some people use old photos from 10 years ago and when you see them in real life, you want to run the other way.
I was surprised at the number of messages I got from men.
Most of them I had to delete because they were from men only interested in sex.
Don't get me wrong, I love sex but this time I want it all.
Amazing sex and love.
Do I ask for too much?
Maybe, but I will try my best to get it all.
I don't know what the future will bring, but I do know that I don't want to be a mistress anymore.
I had to meet Markus one last time to tell him this face to face.
He didn’t believe me at first but after I stopped answering his messages and calls, he finally gave up.
This was another sign that he never really cared.
If he really loved me, he would have tried harder to win me back.
But, I take the Markus chapter as a lesson learned and move on.
My Prince, I am ready!
Late Nights
When My girlfriend asked what I wanted for my birthday, I wanted to say another girlfriend.
Our relationship is not what it used to be and I know it's time to put an end to it but I can't.
Yesterday I thought that by this time today I would be a free man.
Free to be with any woman I want or free to be just single for a while.
No more fights, no more useless arguments every single day.
Unfortunately, Corinne changed my plans when she announced that we will have a child together.
To be honest, I don't even know how that happened.
Our sex life has been p
retty much non-existent.
I guess it could have happened that one time when we both got drunk.
She doesn’t seem at all attracted to me anymore but she doesn’t want to give up.
Corinne is obsessed with getting married but I guess she loves more the idea of being a bride than being my wife.
Now that I am going to be a father, I am not going to leave my child just because I am not happy.
I grew up without a father and I would never do this to my own child.
I am better than that.
So, I guess I am getting married.
Today we met with a wedding planner.
I wasn’t at all excited about the idea of planning this party but it had to be done.
My excitement grew suddenly when I saw the wedding planner.
She is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.
Her green eyes made me forget that I came there with my fiancée.
Her long, dark hair made wonder how it would feel to have that hair tickling my chest while she kisses me all over.
I felt guilty for a second for having these thoughts, but only for a second.
I could at least dream if my reality didn’t bring me too much joy.
Her name is Anne and while she talked to us about the wedding, I swear she kept looking at me.
She barely even acknowledged Corinne.
Of course, Corinne didn’t even notice.
She was too absorbed in the wedding planning to notice what was going on right under her nose.
I kept smiling and flirting with Anne almost like I was single and trying to get a date.
I didn’t ask her out, it wouldn’t be fair to Corinne even if our relationship is not what it should be.
As we were living, I could see she put a little note in my pocket.
My heart was pounding really hard and I couldn’t wait to be alone so I could read the note from the hot wedding planner.
I made an excuse and asked to use their toilet.
Her note said:
I want you, even for one night. I never did this before but I couldn’t help myself when I saw you. Meet me tonight at 8 outside my office building?
I brought Corinne home and then I left in a hurry to meet Anne.
She had a big smile on her face and she invited me to her place.
We didn’t talk much, she didn’t want to know too much about me.
Anne said that if we get to know each other better, we risk to fall in love with each other.
We wanted to keep things simple: just wild sex.
Just one night and then I could focus on my wedding and life with a woman I didn’t love.
That night was the best night of my life.
I didn’t think it was possible to feel that way and I don’t just mean that the sex was amazing.
It was really amazing but it was much more than that.
I felt like I knew her already.
After only a few hot dates I knew I was in trouble.
I was falling in love with Anne.
I told her one night:
"Anne, I love you."
"Please don't say this, I know it already but don't say it out loud."
"Why not? Don't you love me?"
"Of course I do but this was supposed to be just about sex. You are getting married and you will have a baby with another woman."
"I know and I will be the best father I can be but I don't want to marry anyone else. I want you, Anne."
"Do you really mean it?" She asked with tears in her eyes.
"Of course I do, marry me, Anne!"
"Yes, a million times yes!"