by Ryan, Kaylee
“Good idea.” She pulls her phone from her purse and dials her best friend. Kendall answers and she begins telling her what’s going on.
I decide to call Ridge and fill him in. Before I get the chance, my phone rings. His ears must have been burning. “Hey, man.”
“What’s going on?”
“We got a call in the middle of the night to come to the hospital. Dawn’s sister had a baby.”
“No shit?”
“Yeah, but it’s more than that. She skipped. She just fucking left,” I say, keeping my voice low.
“What the fu— crap?” he says. “What’s that mean?”
“Dawn’s going to try and get custody. The baby is small, so damn tiny, could fit in the palm of my hand.” I run my fingers through my hair. “I don’t know how long the baby has to stay here, but I can’t leave her alone.”
“I wouldn’t want you to. What do you need?”
“Honestly, right now, your attorney.”
“Done. I’ll text you and Dawn the number. You guys need anything?”
“I don’t really know. We just drove down here first thing this morning and we weren’t expecting this.”
“How could you?”
“Yeah,” I agree with him. “I’m going to be off for a few days at least.”
“Done. Take the time you need. I’ve been there, brother. Dealt with the unexpected.”
“Thanks, Ridge.”
“Take care of your girl.”
“Both of them,” I say without thinking.
“Huh?”
“The baby, she’s a little girl.”
“Both of them,” he agrees.
“Thanks. I’ll keep you updated as I know more.”
“Sounds good. We’re here, man. Whatever you need.”
“Appreciate it,” I say, and end the call. Sliding my phone back in my pocket, I take a seat and watch Dawn pace back and forth in front of the window as she talks to Kendall.
“Thanks, Kendall,” she says, and by the sound of her voice, she’s fighting tears. “I’ll let you know,” she says, ending the call.
“Well?”
“She gave me their attorney’s number. I’m going to call them now.” She taps the screen of her phone and dials the number. After asking to speak with the attorney, she’s put on hold and she’s back to pacing. Back and forth. Back and forth. She doesn’t stop until she begins to introduce herself and tell her story. I wait patiently, trying to decipher their conversation only hearing one side. “Really?” she asks, her voice hopeful. “Thank you. Thank you so much. Yes, yes. I’ll see you then.” She ends the call and looks at me with a smile.
“Well?”
“He’s here, in Mason. He had a hearing, and he’s at the courthouse. He wants me to meet him there now.”
“Okay.” I stand from my chair. “Let’s go.”
“No. Wait. We can’t leave her here all alone. What if… what if Destiny comes back? I mean, I don’t think she’s stupid enough to do that, but we can’t leave the baby here all alone.”
“I’ll stay.”
“I-I’m sorry.”
“Why are you apologizing? I’m here for you, and whatever you need. You want me to stay, I’ll stay.”
“Okay, and you’re on the list as my fiancé,” she says, and an embarrassed flush coats her cheeks.
“I’ll stay here with the baby. I won’t leave the nursery waiting room. You go, do what you need to do. She and I will be here when you get back.”
“Mark, I— thank you.”
“Come here.” I hold my hand out for her and she places hers in mine, letting me pull her into my chest. Wrapping my arms around her, I comfort her in the only way I know how.
Touch.
“I should go. I don’t want to keep him waiting.” She stretches to press a kiss to my cheek and backs away. “I’ll hurry.”
“Go. Be safe and do what you need to do.” With a nod, she’s gone.
* * *
“How is she?” I ask the nurse when she comes out of the Authorized Only door. I’ve been sitting here in the waiting room for two hours. Every once in a while I go to the glass window and peer in at the babies. Baby Girl Miller has been there every time I checked until the last time I checked. That was about ten minutes ago. I was giving it five more minutes before I beat the door down to find out where she is.
“She’s doing okay, considering.”
“Where is she?” I stand. I’m an intimidating fucker with my height and my ink. I’m not against using it to make sure that little girl is safe.
“She’s fussy. We have volunteers who hold the babies and rock them. She’s coming down from the drugs, and well, she’s struggling,” she says sadly.
“What can we do?” I ask. I feel helpless at this point. That tiny baby girl is suffering. My girl is suffering and damn if I can fix it. I want to fix it and I can’t. I don’t know what she needs.
“Well, there is something.”
“Anything.”
“Babies, they need the comfort, and skin-to-skin contact is good for them. It calms them, stabilizes their breathing, their heart rate, and many other things.”
“Okay, what does that mean exactly?” Skin-to-skin can mean a lot of different things. She’s not my baby, so I’m not sure what the rules are. “I’m not her dad,” I add as an afterthought.
She nods. “But you are approved to have contact with her.”
“So what do I need to do?”
“We’d bring you in. Have you remove your shirt and hold the baby against your chest.”
“That’s it? I just hold her?”
“Yes.”
“Let’s do it.”
“You sure?”
I give her a look, one that tells her not to question me. “Lead the way,” I finally say. She turns and swipes her badge, opening the door, and I follow along behind her.
“We need you to remove your shirt and then wash up. Place these over your jeans.” She hands me a pair of scrubs. “Once you’re suited up, we’ll move you to a small private room. Due to her condition, someone will stay with you. Do you have any questions?”
“Nope.” I get to work stripping off my shirt and washing my arms. I go a step further and wash my chest as well. No way do I want to hurt her in any way. Once I’m done, I slip on the scrub pants and pull the booties on over my shoes. “Ready.”
The nurse, whose name I still don’t know, leads me through another door down a small hallway and pushes open another door. It’s a small exam room. The lights are dim. There is a rocking chair in the corner and two other chairs on the opposite wall. “Have a seat. I’ll bring the baby to you.”
I debate on calling or texting Dawn to make sure she’s okay with this, but they said it will help the baby, so I have to try. I’m sitting here helpless; it’s the least that I can do.
“How do we do this?” I ask once the nurse is back, pushing the bed the baby girl is in.
“You’ll need to be mindful of her tubes. I’ll place her on your chest, and cover her with a blanket. All you need to do is hold on to her, and rock,” she says as she lifts the baby from her bed.
“I can do that.” I open my arms and wait as she lays her against my chest. My hand cradles her back, and it almost covers her entire body. “She’s so damn tiny,” I say as I lift half my hand and let her cover the baby, and then the other half.
“Just hold her close and rock her,” the nurse says soothingly.
I start to rock slowly, pushing the chair with my feet. “I’m not sure what your aunt Dawn is going to call you, but I’ve had a lot of time to search the Internet today,” I tell the baby. “Don’t worry, we’ll fill you in on what that is when you’re a little older. Anyway, I was looking for names to call a baby girl, and the one that sticks out to me is Daisy. So, until Aunt Dawn chooses a name for you, I’m going to call you Daisy. You okay with that?” I ask her. She twitches in my arms and I freeze, halting the rocking and stare wide-eyed at the nurse.
“She
’s okay. That’s her body reacting to the withdrawal. Just keep talking to her. It’s soothing.”
“I’m so sorry,” I tell this innocent baby in my arms. With two fingers, I gently rub her back as I continue to rock her. “So, Daisy,” I say, clearing my thoughts, “that’s my name for you. Aunt Dawn will give you a name that will be yours, and as unique as you are. I just hated calling you Baby Girl Miller. You’re more than that,” I explain like she actually understands me. “Daisies are beautiful flowers, my mom’s favorite in fact. They symbolize new beginnings and that’s what you are. A new chapter in our lives.”
I’m so lost in my conversation with the baby, I didn’t hear the door open. But when I hear sniffles, my head jerks up and I find Dawn standing with her hands over her chest, and tears coating her cheeks. The nurse, standing next to her with her hand on her shoulder, tears shimmer in her eyes as well.
“What happened?” I ask. I’ve seen enough of her tears to last me a lifetime.
“Nothing.” She smiles and wipes at her cheeks. “I mean, something. The judge granted me guardianship. I have to have my place inspected before I can bring her home, but I’m allowed to make medical decisions for her, and I’m not worried about the inspection, so I get to bring her home. When she’s ready,” she adds.
“That’s good news, baby.” I look down at my chest. “You hear that, Daisy? Aunt Dawn is going to take good care of you.” I turn my attention back to Dawn. “Why the tears?”
“You.” She shakes her head. “You’re an amazing man, Marcus Adams.” She must read my confused expression because she laughs, a loud “throw your head back” laugh, which startles Daisy. “You’re here, holding this tiny baby, talking to her, giving her a name all your own. I don’t know any other man who would be here doing what you’re doing right now.”
I don’t tell her that I know of four immediately, not to mention our fathers. “I hated to keep calling her—” She nods, cutting me off.
“I heard you tell her. I think it fits her.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, Daisy it is.”
“Wait. That’s what you want to name her?”
“I do. I was already thinking a D name since that’s what my parents did for Destiny and me, and your explanation of Daisy, I’m sold on the idea.”
Something happens in my chest, almost as if my heart flips over. This little girl, this tiny bundle in my arms, she isn’t mine, but she needs to be someone’s. A flash of my life with her and Dawn, raising her as ours flashes through my mind.
“What is it you’re doing?” Dawn asks, pulling me out of my thoughts.
“Oh, she— I’m sorry. I still don’t know your name,” I admit to the nurse.
“Lynn.” She smiles.
“Right, Lynn said that skin-to-skin is good for her. Her heart and breathing,” I explain.
Lynn picks up. “Skin-to-skin contact has proven to regulate body temperature, breathing, and heart rate. It’s also been proven to relax the infant. She’s had a rough afternoon, jerky, but she’s only done it once since he’s had her,” Lynn explains.
“We’ve got this cuddling thing figured out, don’t we, Daisy?” I ask the baby. I tear my eyes away from her to look at Dawn. “You want a turn?” I ask her.
She nods with tears in her eyes. “Yes.”
Lynn jumps into action, leaving me alone with Daisy to get Dawn sorted. A few minutes later, Dawn’s in the room wearing a gown. Carefully, since I’m carrying precious cargo, I stand and Lynn takes her from me. I watch as Dawn opens her gown, and Lynn rests the baby against her chest. Daisy jerks and a whimper comes from her tiny form. Dawn is quick to soothe her, running her hand gently over her back over the blanket.
“She’s lucky to have both of you,” Lynn says.
She steps away, and I take her place, kneeling next to my girls. That’s what they are. Mine. Dawn has been mine, and by association, this baby girl will be as well. She already has her tiny fist wrapped around my heart. No matter what happens moving forward, I’ll be there for both of them.
Chapter Fifteen
Dawn
It’s been four days since I got the call in the middle of the night that my drug-addicted sister had just given birth. Four days since she fled the hospital. Four days since she’s been seen. Four days of watching her baby girl go through withdrawals. Four days of falling in love with a tiny human.
During the four days of living in this hospital, Mark hasn’t left my side. He’s been here every day and every night. I’ve been selfish needing him here with me, not wanting to go through this alone, but this is my new life. It’s unexpected, but mine all the same.
“She’s out,” I tell Mark. He’s sitting in the private room with Daisy on his chest. He’s done this twice a day since we’ve been here. The doctors and nurses say her stats are great and she’s gaining weight. They say they contribute these changes to us being here. That she knows she’s loved.
“Good. I hate that she had such a rough night. I wish they would have come and gotten us.”
I nod my agreement. I wish they would have too. The thought of her suffering causes a twinge in my chest. “Kendall’s bringing me some more clothes,” I tell him. She drove here that first day and brought us each a couple of changes, but I’m not leaving until Daisy does. I’ve already talked to my work and filed for family medical leave. Thankfully, I have some time, so I’ll get paid for the time I’m off.
“Yeah, Ridge was stopping by my place to do the same.”
“Mark.” I sigh. This is not the first time we’ve had this conversation. “I can’t thank you enough for being here with me, for helping me through these first few days. However, I know you have a life to get home to.”
“Aunt Dawn is talking crazy again, Daisy girl,” he says to my sleeping niece.
“Marcus,” I playfully scold him and he chuckles.
“I’m where I’m supposed to be.”
“Stubborn man,” I grumble.
He chuckles. “She thinks I’m charming,” he says to the sleeping baby.
“Knock, knock.” Lynn sticks her head in the door. “Looks like Uncle Mark has the touch.” She smiles when she sees that Daisy is nice and cozy against his chest.
“What can I say? The ladies love me.” He grins.
“Well, how about we put her down so the two of you can go talk to your friends. They’re just outside in the hallway waiting for you.”
“Thank you, Lynn.” She’s been amazing. Hell, the entire hospital staff has been stellar and doing everything they can to help us. They even “overlook” the fact that we’re practically living here. Not that we’re the only ones to have ever done that, but they find us empty rooms to shower in, and when that’s not available, they sneak us into the staff lounge. That feels like special treatment, but what do I know.
“All right, Daisy, we have to go see Aunt Kendall and Uncle Ridge, but we’ll be back soon.” He kisses the top of her tiny little head before standing and placing her in her bed. My heart stalls in my chest as I watch him with her.
There is nothing like seeing a man be affectionate with a child, and in this case, a tiny baby girl. Her pale complexion is a huge contrast to his dark tan and colorful ink. He handles her as if he’s been doing it for years, not just a matter of days. I watch him as he places her in her bed and gently runs his finger over her forehead.
“You sure she doesn’t need a blanket?” he asks Lynn as his brow furrows.
“I’m positive. The lights keep her nice and warm.” He’s asked this same question every day. The answer never changes, but that doesn’t keep him from expressing his concern.
I walk to where he stands next to her bed. “We’ll be back soon, sweetie,” I tell my niece, clasping Mark’s hand and pulling him from the room. We strip out of our scrubs and he pulls his T-shirt over his head before walking out to the hall to find Ridge and Kendall.
“Hey.” Kendall rushes me. “How are you?”
“We’re good. Daisy
is growing and gaining weight. The skin-to-skin seems to be doing her a lot of good. Although she responds better to Mark than to me,” I confess.
“Do you blame her?” Kendall laughs, and I can’t help but crack a smile. “Come on, we brought lunch.” She links her arm through mine and guides us to the waiting room at the end of the hall.
“What smells so damn good?” Mark asks from behind us.
“Margaret’s,” Kendall replies, and my mouth waters.
“I haven’t eaten there since we move to Jackson.”
“Me either.”
“What’s Margaret’s?” Mark asks.
“This small little diner in town. They have the best homecooked food.” I take in the small table that’s set up, and my eyes mist with tears. I pull my best friend into a hug. “Thank you for this. For driving all this way to bring us clothes, twice in a week, for bringing us what’s sure to be the best meal we’ve had in a week. I just— Thank you.”
“We’re family.” She gives me a watery smile. “Now dig in.”
That’s exactly what we do. The four of us sit here at a small round table in the hospital waiting room and have lunch. We catch up on life, work, and the rest of our family. It’s a nice break from the hospital food and the conversation of the medical staff.
“So, how’s she doing?” Ridge asks.
“Great, man,” Mark answers before I can. “She’s gaining weight, and her vitals are stable. We’ve been doing that skin-to-skin thing and they say it’s really helping her.”
Kendall gives me a look, one I can’t really decipher before it’s gone. “Do you have pictures?” she asks.
“Of course we do,” Mark says, and he and I both pull out our phones and start flipping through images.
“He’s good with her,” Kendall whispers, just for me.
“He is. He’s been great.” So great in fact I’ve been leaning on him too much.
“Cute, right?” I hear Mark say, which pulls my attention to him. He’s still swiping through pictures on his phone.
“She’s tiny,” Ridge says, sitting back in his seat.
“Yeah, I was afraid I’d break her at first.” Mark laughs.