Amish Sweethearts

by Amy Clipston

  “Can we go inside?”

  “Of course.” Matthew and Jake climbed onto the first floor where the front door was planned. Then they each held out their hands to help up Lindsay and Katie.

  Once inside, Lindsay gestured around the house. “Give me a tour.”

  For the next thirty minutes, the four of them walked around the first floor as Matthew described the rooms and Lindsay and Katie discussed how to furnish each one. Lindsay’s soul swelled with excitement as she imagined living in the house with Matthew as they started their new life as a married couple. She could hardly wait to bake in her own kitchen and sew in her own sewing room.

  Soon the sun began to set, staining the sky in vivid streaks of yellow, purple, red, and orange. A cool breeze filtered through the house, and Lindsay shivered, rubbing her bare arms.

  “It’s getting late.” Jake started toward where the front door would be. “We should head back to your dat’s haus. He might be looking for you.”

  “Ya, you’re right.” Katie followed him, and after Jake climbed down, he helped her to the ground.

  “Could we visit your schweschder?” Lindsay asked as Matthew helped her down.

  Lindsay was surprised when he hesitated for a moment. Maybe what he was worried about had something to do with his sister. But then he said, “Ya, I think she’d like that.”

  “Would you like to visit Betsy with us?” Lindsay asked Jake and Katie.

  Katie frowned. “I’d better get home. You know how strict mei dat is. Would you tell her Jake and I said hello?”

  “Ya, of course.” Lindsay recalled how Katie’s father had punished her when she first became friends with Jake because he wasn’t Amish. Now that he had decided to join the faith, her father had loosened up on his rules slightly. But he didn’t allow her to be away from the house for long. “Would you please tell Aenti Rebecca I’ll be back soon, after a quick visit with Betsy?”

  “Ya, I will.” Katie waved before she and Jake disappeared through the trees.

  Now that they were alone, Lindsay stopped and faced Matthew at the bottom of Betsy’s back-porch steps. “What’s really bothering you?”

  He paused and then rubbed his clean-shaven chin. “I’m just tired.”

  “Are you sure?” She worried her lower lip as she silently willed him to confide in her.

  “Ya.” He touched her cheek. “Everything’s fine. Let’s go see Betsy before your onkel comes looking for you.”

  “Okay.” She let him take her hand, steer her up the steps and into the house and through the mudroom.

  They found Betsy sitting at the kitchen table, writing in what looked like an accounting journal.

  “Hi, Lindsay.” Betsy closed the journal and stood. “How are you doing?”

  “I’m well. How are you?” Lindsay hugged her.

  “All right,” Betsy said after quickly glancing at her brother. Then she crossed to the kitchen counter and picked up a container. “Would you like some kichlin? I can put on kaffi.”

  “Oh, no. Please don’t go to any trouble.” Lindsay went to her side.

  “It’s no trouble.” Betsy filled the percolator and set it on the stove. “How is your family?”

  “They’re gut. We missed you at the gathering tonight. You should visit us at Onkel Daniel’s haus sometime soon.” Lindsay glanced toward the table. Matthew was staring at the journal. “Gracie is getting so big.”

  “Oh, I bet she is.” Betsy carried the container to the table. “Let’s share these kichlin. I made oatmeal raisin and chocolate chip earlier today.”

  “Danki.” Lindsay sat down at the table and Matthew sank onto the chair beside her. “Where are the maed?”

  “They’re out in the barn with their dat. They like to help with chores at night.” Betsy opened the container and they each took a cookie. “How is the bakery doing?”

  As Lindsay talked about her work, she took in the dark circles under Betsy’s eyes. Somehow, they looked different from the dark circles under her Aenti Rebecca’s eyes, as though they were the result of something more than what can make a mother so tired. And although Matthew’s sister was being pleasant, Lindsay thought she detected sadness in her demeanor.

  She wondered again if something happening with Betsy was the source of Matthew’s blue mood.

  Soon the coffee was ready, and Lindsay helped Betsy gather mugs, sugar, and milk. As they enjoyed the refreshments, they talked about family and friends, and Lindsay was careful not to ask any questions that might seem like prying.

  She glanced at the clock above the stove and realized it was after seven.

  “We better get going, Matthew. We have church in the morning.” The next day was an off Sunday for her family’s church district, but not for Matthew’s, so she was going to accompany him.

  Lindsay stood and carried two of the mugs to the counter. “Danki so much for the kichlin and kaffi.”

  “Gern gschehne.” Betsy stood and hugged her, lingering a little longer than she normally did. What was going on?

  When they broke apart, Lindsay swiveled toward Matthew. “Would you please walk me back to Katie’s?”

  “Ya.” He took her hand and they went outside.

  Worry gnawed at Lindsay’s insides as she and Matthew walked to Katie’s. When they reached the end of the tree line, Lindsay spun toward him. This was their last chance to be alone before she joined her family.

  “If something is troubling you, you can tell me. It doesn’t matter what it is. I’ll listen without judgment. You can trust me.” She searched his eyes. “You know that, right?”

  But his expression didn’t seem to relax. “Of course I know that. I’m just tired after working on the haus most of the day. I promise you everything will be okay.” He touched her shoulder. “Ich liebe dich.”

  “I love you too.” She smiled. But she was still concerned—about Matthew and his sister.

  Leaning down, he brushed his lips over hers, sending warmth through her veins and making her knees wobble.

  “I’ll see you in the morning, Lindsay.”

  “I’ll be waiting for you.” She squeezed his hand as they stepped through the trees.

  Chapter Three

  Gude mariye!” Lindsay sang as she climbed into Matthew’s buggy the following morning, hoping he’d be in a better mood. “Wie geht’s?”

  “I’m fine. How are you?” He gave her a slight nod before turning toward the horse and directing it down the driveway to the road.

  “I’m gut.” Apprehension nipped at her as she studied his handsome profile. “Did you sleep well last night?”

  “Ya.” He kept his eyes trained straight ahead while guiding the horse. “Did you?”

  Her smiled faded. The deep purple circles under his eyes told her he hadn’t slept much at all, and the strong set of his jaw revealed something was bothering him—no matter what he’d said the night before.

  “Ya, I did. Danki.”

  They rode in silence for several minutes. He hadn’t seemed like it last evening, but was he angry with her for some reason?

  Lindsay fingered the wooden heart in her apron pocket. Matthew gave it to her the day she was baptized, and she often put it there when she was with him. She was glad to find it as the anxiety that had haunted her last night came over her once again.

  She couldn’t stand the silence any longer.

  “Are you upset with me?” The question leapt from her lips as Matthew halted the horse at a red light.

  “What?” He turned toward her, his dark eyebrows drawn together. “Why would I be upset with you?”

  “I don’t know.” She turned her hands palms up. “You’ve been acting distracted and upset since last night. You said you slept well, but the dark circles under your eyes seem to tell a different story.”

  A muscle in his jaw twitched as he looked at her. “You’re right. I didn’t sleep well last night.”

  “Why?” A new thought gripped her emotions. “Have you changed your mind about m
arrying me?” Her voice wobbled as tears threatened to fall.

  “No!” He touched her hand. “I would never change my mind about you or about us.”

  “Okay.” She sniffed, but her stomach still felt tied in worried knots.

  He glanced toward the traffic light and then guided the horse through the intersection.

  “If it’s not me, then what is it? Was iss letz?” She bit back the urge to beg him to tell her what was troubling him.

  He blew out a deep sigh and something flashed in his eyes, but she wasn’t sure what it was. Maybe apprehension? He was silent for a few more beats, and she held her breath.

  Please tell me the truth, Matthew.

  “I’ve just been concerned about the haus,” he finally said.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I want to finish it on time.” He gave her a quick, sideways glance. “I don’t want to disappoint you by not having it done in time for our wedding.”

  She raised her eyebrows and waited for him to elaborate. When he remained silent, she blew out a sigh of relief.

  “Is that all that’s bothering you?” He nodded while focusing on the road ahead. “It’s only May. You have six months to finish our haus. And if it’s not done in time we can always live with your schweschder or mei aenti until the haus is done. There’s no rush to finish it.”

  He gave her a curt nod, but something unspoken remained in his rigid posture and steely gaze. He wasn’t revealing everything troubling his heart, and the revelation cut her to the quick.

  He glanced at her and she saw warmth in his eyes. “Is that a new dress?”

  She glanced down at the emerald-colored dress she’d made earlier in the week. “Ya, it is.”

  He steered the horse into the Ebersol family’s driveway, already lined with buggies. “You look schee today. That green is fantastic. It really brings out your red hair and green eyes.”

  “Danki.”

  “Gern gschehne.”

  She smoothed her hands over her apron as confusion settled over her. Maybe he wasn’t upset with her and he really was concerned only about the house. But if that was true, then why did tension still radiate off him?

  “I’ll see you after the service,” he said as he halted the horse.

  “Ya.” She touched his hand, and he met her gaze. “Remember I love you. You can tell me anything.”

  “I know.” His voice was soft.

  “If there’s something else on your mind, you don’t need to be afraid to share it with me.” She squeezed his hand and then climbed from the buggy.

  “What’s bothering you?” Katie leaned in close as she sat beside Lindsay on the backless bench in the unmarried women’s section of the barn. The service had yet to begin.

  Lindsay glanced across the barn to where Matthew sat with Jake and then crossed her arms over her apron. “Matthew seemed preoccupied and upset about something last night, and this morning too. I tried to get him to talk to me about it, but all he would say is he’s worried about finishing the haus in time for our wedding.”

  “Oh.” Katie nodded slowly. “But you think it’s more than that?”

  “Ya.” Lindsay angled her body toward Katie. “I know it sounds narrisch, but I just have this feeling he’s not telling me something. Do you ever have that feeling with Jake?”

  “I don’t know.” Katie glanced across the barn toward where the young men sat. “We haven’t been together as long as you and Matthew have, but we seem to talk about everything.”

  “We do too. At least I thought we did.” She looked over at Matthew, who was staring at his lap. “Maybe I’m overreacting. Maybe he’s only concerned about finishing the haus on time.”

  “What did you say when he told you he was worried about the haus?”

  “I told him there isn’t any rush to finish it.” She met Katie’s concerned gaze. “I said we could live with his schweschder or mei aenti. I just want to be with him.”

  Katie touched her arm. “Just keep telling him that, and he’ll calm down. You know how serious he can be. Keep showing him how much you’ll love and support him no matter what, and everything will be fine.”

  “I hope so.” Lindsay looked again at Matthew. Maybe he would open up to her soon.

  “You look like you’re about to come out of your skin,” a voice said.

  Matthew glanced over at Jake, who seemed to be studying him again. “What do you mean?”

  Jake glanced around and then leaned closer, lowering his voice. “You seem even more stressed out than you were last night.”

  Matthew shrugged. “I didn’t sleep well. I’m just naerfich about going to the bank tomorrow.”

  “What did Lindsay say when you told her what’s happening? I assume you two talked after you visited your schweschder last night.”

  “No, I haven’t told her.” Matthew folded his arms over his chest.

  “You haven’t told her?” Jake gave Matthew a light punch on his shoulder. “When are you going to?”

  “I don’t know.” Matthew looked over at Jake’s stunned expression. “First I need to have a concrete plan for what I’m going to do.”

  “Have you considered asking Daniel for help? He’s not just one of your bosses. He’s your freind.”

  Matthew shook his head.

  “Why not? Daniel has a lot of respect for you. He would help you. You should ask him for advice.”

  “I have a plan for now. If it doesn’t work out, then I’ll talk to Daniel.”

  Jake opened his mouth to respond just as the service began with a hymn. He closed his mouth and picked up the songbook.

  “Jake.” Matthew leaned over and spoke into his ear. “Please keep this to yourself. Not only are Earl and Betsy not ready to tell everyone what’s going on, but I’m not ready to let Lindsay or the Kauffman family know either. Promise me again you won’t tell anyone what I told you.”

  “I promise.”

  “Danki.” Matthew swallowed his frustration and joined in as the congregation slowly sang the opening hymn. A young man sitting behind them served as the song leader, singing the first syllable of each line. Then the rest of the congregation joined in to finish the verse.

  As Matthew tried to redirect his thoughts toward the service, he silently prayed God would send him a solution so he wouldn’t lose Lindsay and the future he’d planned for them.

  “Danki for taking me to church with you,” Lindsay said as Matthew halted the horse by her back porch. “The luncheon was gut, as usual.”

  “Gern gschehne.”

  He gripped the reins and she once again took in his rigid posture and the hard line of his jaw. “Would you like to come in and visit for a while? I brought home some goodies from the bakery yesterday.”

  “No, danki.” He shook his head. “I’m going to go home and take a nap.”

  “Are you sure? The kinner would love to see you. They ask about you constantly.”

  “I appreciate the invitation, but I’m really tired after not sleeping much last night. I promise I’ll come visit soon.”

  “Okay.” Her shoulders fell as her hope deflated. “Matthew, please. If you need to talk to me, I’ll listen.”

  He swallowed, and he seemed tenser than ever. “Danki. But I’m fine.”

  Was he holding back emotion? Alarm surged through her. She opened her mouth to beg him to tell her what was wrong, but he cut her off.

  “I should go. Please tell Rebecca and Daniel I said hello.” He reached out and touched her hand. “Have a gut day.”

  “You too.” Lindsay pushed open the door and climbed out. She waved as his horse and buggy started down the driveway toward the road.

  Foreboding, heavy and suffocating, pressed down on her shoulders as she climbed the porch steps and entered the house. She walked into the family room, where Aenti Rebecca sat in the rocking chair with Gracie against her chest. Lindsay crossed the room and touched Gracie’s back.

  Aenti Rebecca smiled up at her. “How was church?”


  “It was gut.” Lindsay sank into the high-backed chair beside her. “Where are the other kinner?”

  “They’re taking a nap. Daniel is too.” She tilted her head. “Was iss letz?”

  Lindsay’s lower lip quivered.

  “Ach, mei liewe.” Aenti Rebecca leaned over and touched her arm. “Did you have a disagreement with Matthew?”

  “It’s worse than that.” Lindsay dabbed her tears with her fingers. “Something’s wrong, and he won’t tell me what it is. I’ve tried more than once to get him to talk to me, but I feel as though he’s not telling me everything.” She explained their conversation about the house and how she told him she didn’t care where they live after they were married. “He refused to come in and visit today because he said he was tired after not sleeping well last night, worrying over it.”

  She ran her fingers over the chair arms. “But I know that’s not what’s wrong. I can’t help him if he won’t talk to me. I asked him if I’d done something, and he said it wasn’t me, and that he hasn’t changed his mind about us. But I can’t help feeling as though I’m going to lose him.” She sniffed as tears leaked down her cheeks, splattering her arm.

  “Ach, no. Don’t cry.” Aenti Rebecca set a sleeping Gracie in the nearby swing and then moved the rocking chair closer to Lindsay before sitting back down. She handed Lindsay a handful of tissues. Lindsay wiped her nose and leaned her head against the back of her chair.

  “Look at me,” Aenti Rebecca instructed, and Lindsay turned her head. “Matthew loves you, and he’s devoted to you. I could tell when you first started dating each other.” She paused as if gathering her thoughts. “Matthew reminds me a lot of Daniel. He’s quiet and intense, but he’s also devoted and loyal. You remember how tough things were between Daniel and me when you and Jessica came to live with us, right?”

  “Ya, of course I do.” Lindsay sniffed.

  “He and I had some rough times, but we made it through. When he gets upset about something he shuts down, and it takes him a while to open up. I think Matthew is the same way. Something is bothering him now, and he’s still processing it. He’ll open up to you when he’s ready to share it.” She rubbed Lindsay’s arm.