Neutral

by Darci Darson

  “Westfad Manor,” Alyssa interrupted. “You are tied to my family but we don’t know why. My mum said that we had to fight against our destiny because there is something dark hunting us. You help us in your every consecutive life.”

  “Yes, Westfad Manor. I loved that house.”

  “Cherry and Imre live there now.”

  “And you? What happened to you, Alyssa?”

  “We were attacked by an Opyri. She... she fed on me and I was so scared that I jumped to Atlantis. I met Taharial while she was fighting with a vampire and I helped her to save Imre. But you know there are these rules and I could stay there only for a moment. I don’t think I have much time here, either. I can sense something pulling me out from here.”Alyssa saw that with her every word Paige’s expression darkened more and more and the woman’s eyes widened with horror. “This must be very surprising and difficult for you,” Alyssa added. “My mum says that we are all real freaks.”

  “I’m ok. I just need a minute or two,” Paige said. “Maybe we would go to the lounge and sit on the sofa. We could watch TV for a while.”

  “Ok,” Alyssa agreed and inside she was very excited as she had never seen any movie and her eagerness to experience this was desperate.

  They moved towards the lounge and sat, separated by a big, purple pillow. Alyssa watched the images from the flat screen with her mouth wide open. She did not want to be interrupted and did not pay attention to Paige who left her and wandered to the bedroom, on her way tidying the kitchen and the bathroom. Alyssa absorbed her mum’s world with her whole being. It was new and exciting and... terribly noisy.

  After a funny movie had finished, Alyssa realised that she had been on her own and started from the sofa, moving towards the bedroom only to discover that her saviour was asleep. She returned to the lounge and curled up in a ball on the sofa, covering herself with a blanket that smelled like spring in Iioliv. She fell asleep at once as Paige although scared, unconsciously transmitted her willingness to help and Alyssa knew that she would be very safe here.

  Alyssa felt somebody stroking her arm. Opening her eyes, she realised that she was in Paige’s flat not in her own bedroom, her glance met the woman’s. There was something warm and very familiar between them in this moment, Paige kneeling beside the sofa. There was this stable love and understanding.

  “Child, I do not have much time so listen to me carefully,” the blonde said firmly as she switched on the floor lamp.

  Alyssa sat up rapidly, rubbing her eyes.

  “Grandma, are you ok?” she asked, realising how odd this was.

  “I’m ok, Child. We both have to go. You shouldn’t be here, Alyssa. I’m here to keep you on the right track and it’s time to go. Another Flower needs me.”

  “I know, Grandma,” Alyssa said despite the fact that she had not grasped the meaning of ‘Another Flower’, and leaned forward to hide herself in the woman’s caring arms. The embrace was full of safety and kindness but it lasted only for a moment. “Are you Felicia now?”

  “I’m Felicia Reese. I just sometimes have poor memory. This whole reincarnation thing is a little twisted,” the woman explained as she cupped Alyssa’s face in her hands. “How old are you now?”

  “My mum says that I’m nineteen but it’s not certain,” Alyssa said. “I may be much older. Ettrian said that I should add more than one year to my mum’s calculations but you know how my mum is. She always knows better. I would say that I’m much more than nineteen. I may be even twenty one years old. I think my mum lowers my age to feel better herself. You know how my parents are. They will treat me like a child until I’m one hundred years old. I’m very... immature I guess because of their strict approach. ”

  “You have a lot of time to grow up,” Felicia said. “Appreciate this. How are Yasmeen and Rav?” she questioned with genuine interest, seeming to hurry yet trying to gain as much information as possible. She also laughed with joy.

  “Still in love as you would expect,” Alyssa responded. “They love each other and argue with passion.”

  “How is Ettrian? Are you still going to marry him?” Felicia’s face had lit up in honest joy at the idea.

  “Grandma!” Alyssa said with the embarrassment consuming her cheeks. Her whole being shook. Ettrian had been a family member since she remembered, a mysterious elf but a devoted friend to Yasmeen and Rav. Her dad and Ettrian ran the trading business together, very successfully in fact. “He... he is travelling a lot now. And I... don’t think he would like to marry me. He is treating me like I was still a child. Last time I saw him he... was telling me what to do like I had no ability to make my own decisions. He told me to read my books and dress nicely. And his whole attitude towards me is strange. I don’t understand him at all. He wants to renovate his house and asked me to choose the furniture for him.” To her surprise, there was this blurry memory coursing through her head now. She was nine and Yasmeen, Rav and Ettrian were eating dinner in her house that had been built in the suburbs of the elves’ kingdom whilst organising the precious items for the trade with humans. Yasmeen somehow fished a beautiful ring among the labyrinth of sparkly jewellery.

  “Ettrian,” Yasmeen said to him. “You should keep this ring for a woman who will be your wife. It is a perfect engagement ring.” She explained to the elf all the human customs around the engagement. He listened to Yasmeen with a careful attention. Alyssa bustled around them and exploded with her whole childish affection for the elf, “I will be Ettrian’s wife.” The grownups laughed at her for the rest of the evening. Then a shameful and incinerating thought crossed her mind like a flash. It was a humiliating recollection of one of the elves and her and she hid it in her subconscious as quickly as it appeared. She returned to her present.

  “Everything is not as it should be,” Alyssa said to Felicia with a shaky voice as her heart froze. “ Aymar, Saleh’s son, asked me to marry him. I don’t want him Grandma. He is only a friend to me. How could I marry a friend?” Alyssa added with a hint of humour but deep inside she was far from laughing. Even the word ‘elf’ caused her a stab of uneasiness. She did not want to share more of her shame, not even with Felicia.

  Felicia smiled and folded her hands as if praying, but Alyssa froze as an alarming sensation spread within her.

  ”I’m leaving, Grandma and I don’t know where this time.”

  “Wait, Child, I need your help. Wait a moment. I.. I want you to use the elves’ magic.”

  “Why?” Alyssa asked as her heart pounded and her mind became sharper.

  “I want to go and you can make it painless,” Felicia said with her warm calm. “I was thinking about taking my all pain killers but it’s possible that my carers would save me and as Paige, I’m a kind of coward when it comes to other options that require more time for preparations... We have to go, Child. I have nobody else to ask and you are the only person able to understand that we will meet again. Ettrian taught you well and you are a tough girl.”

  Alyssa shook her head as everything inside her screamed and pushed her to escape and vanish.

  “I don’t want to do this,” the girl said, her voice faltered. “Don’t ask me for this, Grandma. I can ease your pain like Dad could do, but I won’t hurt you.”

  “I’m already dead,” Felicia said and chuckled. “And this life has been horrible for me.”

  Alyssa stood up and started pacing around the room. Her arms swept the air like two anxious oars. She was not sure whether it had been a bad dream or who this young woman really was. She talked like Felicia but looked like Paige and Alyssa had no intention of hurting her nice host.

  The invisible wall started to form, informing the girl that she should not have been here as a panic created a tight knot in her stomach.

  “Hurry, Child,” Felicia said in a sharp voice. “I’m losing you!”

  Alyssa stopped and approached the woman, placing her hand just in the middle of Felicia’s chest, her lips reciting an ancient and mystical language. Her soul filled with good
and evil, the grey and neutral balance of the Universe. Felicia descended, her limp body stretching by the sofa on the brown, thick carpet, her soul departing to a silent emptiness.

  Alyssa knelt beside her and grabbed the woman’s head in both hands and then she twisted her neck with one smooth movement, a sharp noise of breaking bones interrupting the peaceful silence.

  It was so easy for her. Natural.

  Chapter 3

  Alyssa stood still whilst a strong gust of wind tore at her brown hair, covering her face like a shawl. Her eyes closed and the tears stopped flowing down her cheeks. Her body trembled and goosebumps popped up all over her skin as she felt the massive drop in air temperature. The girl wondered in which direction she would walk as all around, there was a muddy and desolate field with naked trees guarding its edges. When she lifted her head and glanced at the sky, an unexpected fear constricted her throat. A powerful storm was approaching to disturb the afternoon and she knew that staying in an open space would not be safe. The sky was covered by an expanse of angry and threatening greyness.

  Alyssa moved forward, her feet sinking in the dense and sticky mud, every step like a squelching torture when a slim figure emerged from behind a tree, ambling at a slow pace towards her. She moved faster with a great effort, her skinny trousers covered in wet and cold dirt up to her knees. When the figure was close enough, Alyssa recognised that he was a young man, his face looking sick and unhealthy. His eyes were filled with a painful hunger as he looked her up and down. With his clothes comprised of an old linen shirt and filthy brown jacket complemented by trousers full of holes he looked like he had endured a lot in his life. His appearance was a demonstration of his poor and miserable existence. Stopping a few steps away from her, he observed her with his greedy eyes for a moment, growing suspicion darkening the tiny scar marks on his face.

  “Have you got some bellytimber?” he asked, taking one step forward. His speech was like a hissing, barely intelligible.

  Alyssa stepped back, swaying a bit as she outstretched her arms to keep her balance. Her Varuh sensed something dangerous and mad permeating the man’s head and a cloud of vapour left her mouth. His intentions seemed dark and violent.

  “Go away,” she said sharply with repulsion. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

  The man grinned widely, exposing his four and only black teeth.

  Alyssa straightened up, her teeth clenching and a shot of adrenaline going through her veins. She did not know what to do as her feet got stuck in the mud and she was trying to free herself from the trap.

  “Go away!” she shouted, fighting to keep a standing position but the man did not listen and jumped towards her. They fell on the ground, his bone-thin body pressing against Alyssa’s, immobilising her. His disgusting, rotten breath made her feel sick. The girl freed her hands from underneath his and grabbed his head, twisting it with a quick movement. It was cold, clean and precise. When he let out his last breath, Alyssa rolled his limp body off of her with an effort and crawled away, observing the man’s surprised and still eyes. It had been so easy as though natural for her. She stared at the corpse for a long time whilst the shock inside her grew and crippled her senses. She wondered whether this was her true nature. The elves had taught her to kill when necessary. A tiny doubt crossed her mind whether that miserable being was a real threat to her. Frozen in her numbness, she felt the chill of the electrified air invading her every cell.

  As time passed, she managed to stand up, massaging her stiff and desensitized limbs. Making sure that there had been nobody else near the crime scene, she rushed towards the dark line of trees, her body trembling, attacked by the smacking blows of the wind and her remorse. She did not deserve to return home and she did not want to, either. She would not have been able to look in her dad’s eyes after what she had done. He might have been the only one to despise taking those two human lives but she respected him most. She loved her mum and was certain that she would not judge her, but Yasmeen yelled too much and expected from others to do things her way. Recently Alyssa had started to crave for some independence; not to mention Yasmeen was more a human in opposition to her daughter who seemed to be more a Varuh and an elf. Walking at a fast pace, she left the field and sank into the density of the wood. Her teeth were chattering and causing her jaw muscles pain as she realised that she would stay in this dimension. The pulling sensation of her travelling ability abandoned her entirely to be replaced by a profound certainty that there would be a purpose for her here. And she was eager to discover what that purpose was that had brought her here. Her adventurous nature took control over her actions. The guilt inside her fell asleep as she thought that the Opyri had deserved to be destroyed by Taharial. Killing a vampire was not a new experience for her. She had seen Ettrian killing one when her family and the elf had travelled home after Felicia’s funeral. She remembered how quick and precise Ettrian had been, like he had mastered the skill for centuries.

  The poor and hungry attacker had deserved to die as he had been a bad being lost to society. Just as Felicia had deserved to go to her next life, leaving her excruciating suffering behind. As Alyssa’s numb feet carried her through the wood, the storm demonstrated its power, pouring with a wild hatred down, the frequent snaps of lightning threatening from the distance. She wondered what else would happen in her life. She clearly deserved to be on her own now. In this moment, she was determined to secure a happy and interesting life for herself in this strange place; maybe she would find her true love like her mum did, or maybe she would become somebody completely different than Alyssa Devita from the Alyssum Forest. She remembered now what an elf woman had said to her just before her disappearance from Iioliv. She would fight to find her true happiness as that woman had asked her and she would not return to Iioliv no matter what.

  Alyssa lifted her head and in that moment, her leg stumbled, gripped by the slippery labyrinth of tree roots. Her hand pressed against the soft and wet moss climbing up the tree trunk but gave her no support as the girl fell backwards, her head bumping against a sharp and cold surface. She sighed and departed into the timeless void of her unconsciousness.

  When she opened her eyes, in the first moment, she could not see anything. Her body swayed like she was lying on a swing, carried by somebody’s muscular yet cold arms. The captivating scent of this person did not resemble anything that Alyssa had experienced before, being full of mystical and heavy sadness mixed with some spring freshness. When her eyes adjusted, she perceived a pair of blue and warm eyes. The boy could have been no more than twenty years old and his honest smile brought a strange yearning to her heart. His skin was taking every particle of warmth from hers. Eerie silence surrounded them as they floated, a strange emptiness creeping into every cell of Alyssa’s body.

  As soon as the sensation returned to her, she felt an excruciating agony exploding at the back of her head. She was grateful that her father was a Varuh so thanks to him she could heal faster than a pure human. The pain, however, did not prevent her from staring at her saviour holding her gently and effortlessly. When her eyes scanned his blonde short hair she noticed that it was stained with dried blood on a small area around his right temple.

  “Are you ok?” Alyssa asked, stirring in his arms like a nervous bird splashed with water.

  He did not say anything and she noticed that his slim body was dressed in a red uniform with white straps and dark golden buttons. Suddenly, she also realised that they had been in a building, climbing up the stairs. They then moved through the corridor; the dim light dispersed by a few candelabras on two side tables, created a mysterious atmosphere like a shimmering aura, ghostly faces grimacing from the paintings hanging on the walls. The still silence and Alyssa’s rapid breath were the only stimuli registered by her ears.

  They entered a room and Alyssa felt the boy placing her on a big four poster bed, her injured head resting on a soft and slightly damp pillow, probably from lack of use. Her pain throbbed like a merciless torture. The injury must h
ave been far more serious than she had initially suspected. She stared at the young man as he stood beside the edge of the bed, gifting her with his honest smile. Due to her headache, he seemed to her somehow translucent, shorter than Rav and Ettrian but he was also slim and had well defined muscles. Accustomed to Varuh and elf beauty, she considered him as an average human boy. However, there was something in his eyes and in the features of his face that made him look interesting to her. She blinked and felt herself losing consciousness again as he whispered his name into her ear. It was: Philip Reese.

  The strong gust of the wind hit against the window as the air moving through the gaps between the frame and the glass moaned like a soul suffering in hell. It was the last sound that she heard, with the blue warmth of Philip’s eyes in front of hers as her vision kept narrowing to a tunnel, until there was nothing.

  Chapter 4

  The conversation resembled a sine curve, hitting Alyssa’s ears and drifting away. When her senses regained their power, she could distinguish words and voices at last.

  “Poor girl... Who is she?” a mature, feminine voice said.

  “I ain’t got nothing to say about her, ma’am,” a young girl responded. “I found her in the morning.”

  Alyssa sat up rapidly and fixed her eyes on two women standing by the side of the bed, her mind spinning in a crazy waltz.

  The mature woman wore a pale green dress closely fitted to the torso just under the bust, falling loosely below, the hem cascading down to her ankles. Her grey hair was parted in the centre with tight ringlets over the ears. The woman’s eyes emanated an electric energy and a pure grey kindness whilst the girl about fourteen, pale and bone-thin, hid behind the old lady’s back. The child had big, pale green eyes and hair of a brown, mouse fur colour.

  “I’m sorry,” Alyssa said. “I had an accident in the woods and Philip Reese brought me here.”