Long Lost

by Lexi Blake

  “See, when you don’t talk I wonder what’s going through your head, and I don’t think it’s good,” Robert was saying. “You know you can’t kill Levi. He was actually trying to be helpful today. You were the one who wasn’t cooperating.”

  It had been a rough day, and the evening hadn’t been much better. He’d gotten very little sleep the night before and it was starting to get to him. After the scene at the gazebo, he’d found a guest room and lain in bed for hours going over all the ways he hated his former self. In the morning he’d gone downstairs but Roni had been in the breakfast room and it was apparent she hadn’t told anyone that they’d had a major blowout fight and broken up. She’d given him a wan smile and sat next to him during breakfast before going back to the room they’d shared. She hadn’t come down to the holding room where he and the rest of the group had spent hours trying to jog his memory, with Levi Green pushing every single button he could.

  Then dinner had come and while she’d cooked it, she’d announced she wasn’t feeling well and had gone to bed early.

  He already missed her.

  “So I am going to assume that Roni’s excuse that she wasn’t feeling well was exactly that—an excuse to not be around today.” His brother didn’t seem to mind that he wasn’t responding. Robert kept going. “You weren’t all over her like she was your dying child, so I’ll make the secondary assumption that the two of you had a major fight and that’s why you’ve spent the entire day looking like a puppy who got kicked.”

  “I’m not a fucking puppy.” He got enough of that shit from Big Tag.

  Robert groaned and sat back. “Damn it. Ariel’s right. You’re being a dick. What did you do?”

  He huffed and turned to his brother. “You want to play Am I the Asshole?”

  “I want to know what’s going through my brother’s head. I’m worried about him because my brother can find a way to smile through the worst parts of life. He never gets dark unless he’s worried he’s done something wrong.”

  He was the asshole in this case. Robert was trying to help and it wouldn’t work to tell him he wanted to be alone. He knew it wouldn’t work because it hadn’t worked when Robert had told him the same thing. He’d simply held on until Robert was ready to talk. He’d been his brother’s shadow and he hadn’t even realized he was Robert’s brother then. Now that they knew they’d grown up together, gone through life together, he accepted that there was zero way Robert gave up. It was a miracle he’d waited this long to confront him. He could talk now or his brother would be on his ass for hours.

  “We had a fight.” Maybe they could handle this like men. He’d say what happened and Robert would nod and they would drink beer.

  “Obviously. What was the fight about?”

  “See, this is why I think Tag is an asshole. He tells us to be men and suck everything up, but he made us go to all that therapy and now we think we should talk about things. I don’t want to talk about it.”

  Robert chuckled and took a drink of his beer. “That’s the funny thing about Tag. He whines about men not being men anymore and then he’s the very person who makes you talk. Because beneath that veneer of toxic masculinity beats the heart of a man who cares. I also sometimes think Tag decided he wouldn’t lie to himself, so why should he bother to lie to anyone else? On a personal level, of course. On a business level, he’s a spectacular liar.”

  Tucker went quiet for a moment but his brother never moved. Merely sat there waiting.

  “She thinks I slept with her sister,” Tucker admitted.

  “What?”

  This was why he didn’t want to go into it. It was a shocking accusation and yet was it really?

  “You slept with her sister?” That hadn’t come from Robert. Solo stepped out from the side of the house, staring at him like her eyes were laser beams and she could cut him right there.

  Robert frowned her way. “Eavesdropping is beneath you.”

  “Hello, spy,” Solo replied, pointing to herself. “And besides, Beck is listening in on the other side. I told him my side was better but he’s got to be argumentative.”

  Tucker stood, glaring as Ezra stepped from his place.

  “Thanks, Solo,” Ezra said. “You know just because you get caught doesn’t mean you have to rat me out.”

  Solo ignored him, turning to Tucker. “I’m sorry. You weren’t cooperative today and that’s not like you. I had to try to figure out what’s going on with you. I’ll be honest, I hadn’t thought about Roni. I thought she was tired. You two were fine yesterday.”

  Ezra shook his head. “I knew it was Roni. They didn’t talk at breakfast this morning, and I’m pretty sure he didn’t sleep with her. I caught him sneaking into one of the guest rooms in the east wing last night.”

  “I thought you went to bed.” Damn, but he’d been certain he hadn’t gotten caught. He wasn’t sure why, but he wasn’t ready to tell everyone they weren’t together. Maybe he was still thinking, still trying to find a way out of the trap.

  “I wanted to make sure our friends all stayed in bed,” Ezra explained. He moved around to the porch. “I don’t trust them.”

  “None of us trusts them.” Solo stepped up next to her ex. “But we need them.”

  He had to admit, they were a good-looking couple. Solo was a statuesque blonde, an Amazon of a woman. Most men would look small compared to her, but Ezra was her male counterpart. He was taller than she was, broader, and oddly his looks complemented hers. He actually looked more handsome when he stood beside her.

  He liked the way Roni fit under his arm when she cuddled up, how her head would rest against his chest. He’d missed her all night long. He was afraid he would miss her for the rest of his life.

  “And that means we need Tucker to work with them,” Solo continued.

  Robert stood beside him, completing the standoff. “He’s doing his best.”

  “That’s not what you were saying three minutes ago,” Ezra pointed out. “I believe you came out here to do exactly what we’re trying to do.”

  “Yeah, well, he’s my brother. I get to be irrational about him,” Robert replied. “I don’t like the two of you ganging up on him.”

  “We’re trying to pull this thing off. That means we have to work together,” Ezra argued. “Normally, unlike Tucker here, I would stay out of all the personal stuff. I would love to give him his privacy even though he doesn’t deserve it.”

  “Hey,” Robert began.

  “Nah, that’s fair.” Despite the fact that his whole life seemed fucked, he had to concede Ezra had a point. “I watched him and Solo fight once while eating a bag of popcorn and betting on the outcome with Owen.”

  “Still, they should be upfront about it.” Robert didn’t seem as eager to be reasonable.

  It was a big-brother thing.

  “Uhm, I think I asked about ten times today what was wrong.” Solo’s boot tapped against the ground. “Look, I get that you and Veronica are having problems. Maybe you could have a couples session with Ariel. But Rupert isn’t happy with how this is moving along and the Germans weren’t thrilled either.”

  “Tell Rupert he can bite my ass,” Ezra replied.

  Solo’s hands were fists at her sides. “Yeah, that sounds about right. Do you have any idea how hard it is to smooth things over for you? You’ve got the subtlety of an angry bear. We’re not in a power position here and we won’t be until we know where that intel is. They won’t let us sit out here forever.”

  “And I won’t let them rush my brother,” Robert argued. “I won’t let them push a bunch of drugs on him. It’s been a day. We all knew it would take a while.”

  “I want to know what happens if McDonald took the intel and it’s gone.” Tucker had spent all day with that possibility gnawing at his gut. “It’s the most likely scenario. If I had it in my hands when McDonald caught me, it’s gone.”

  “I don’t think she had it,” Solo said. “If she had that information, she wouldn’t have run from Kronberg
.”

  “She’s right.” Ezra was softer now as he turned his focus from his ex-wife to Tucker. “If she had blackmail material, McDonald would have used it. She wouldn’t have fled to Argentina. Her money dried up. She needed that money to continue her work.”

  “It’s precisely why we started robbing banks,” Robert said. “So logic points to the fact that you had to have dumped the intel somewhere. You knew McDonald was on to you and you hid it.”

  “I hid it somewhere in Paris.” It was a daunting thought. “It’s not exactly a small city. It would be like looking for a needle in a haystack.”

  Solo nodded. “I agree. We’ve also got to account for the fact that it’s been years and it could have been thrown away or moved or destroyed. I know the truth is we probably won’t find it. But I think they might be appeased if they know it’s not out there.”

  “Tucker, if you remember what was on that report, I need you to never tell anyone,” Ezra said, his voice low. “My worst-case scenario is you’re a living record of those names.”

  Robert’s hand came to his shoulder and he took a sharp breath. “I hadn’t thought of that. You have to lie. If you remember those names, you can’t talk about them.”

  “I don’t know I’ll have a choice,” Tucker replied. “I have to do whatever it takes to get Jax out.”

  “I’ll get Jax out,” Ezra promised. “I won’t let him rot in jail. I’ve already started looking at options.”

  “I will help.” Solo moved up the steps to join them. “I’ve got some safe houses he can use. You, too, if you need them. But if we can find the intel or prove to them it’s been destroyed, things will be much easier. We won’t need safe houses or aliases. Jax and River can go home to Colorado. You can go to Wyoming if you want. We might be able to find Sasha’s daughter if there’s any information about him on the report.”

  He wasn’t the only one with skin in this game. Robert had promised Sasha he would look for the daughter he’d only vaguely remembered. “I’ll try harder tomorrow.”

  Solo sighed and there was a weariness in her eyes. “Thank you. I’m going to take the night shift with Levi. Nina needs a break.”

  Ezra moved past her. “No, you won’t. I’ll do it. I don’t want you anywhere near him.”

  “He’s in a cell.” Solo started to argue and then stopped. “Thank you. I would prefer to not be around him. I appreciate it, Be…Ezra.”

  “Don’t. It sounds weird coming from you.” Ezra had a hand on the door.

  The normally indomitable Solo suddenly seemed hesitant. “Thank you for handling Levi, Beck. In the morning, I’ll talk to Rupert and smooth things over. I’ll let him know we’ll give it another shot, and maybe we can think about letting Ariel try hypnosis again.”

  “That would be good,” Ezra replied.

  They were so going to do it soon. Like hard do it soon. Despite his own problems, he kind of wanted to pop some corn and continue watching this particular show.

  He deserved the eavesdropping.

  “Think about what I said.” Ezra looked back at Tucker and Robert from the door Solo had just walked through. “I’ll do anything I have to do to protect you.”

  He would break Jax out of prison, help Tucker get away if he needed to. Ezra would put his own life on the line. Ezra Fain hadn’t been born in McDonald’s lab, but he was one of them. “Thank you, brother.”

  Ezra stopped for a moment as if the words had shocked him. He nodded slowly. “Always, brother.”

  He disappeared, following after Solo.

  “I don’t think you can know what that means to him,” Robert said.

  Tucker sighed because they were going to get back to what he didn’t want to talk about. He knew it. His blood brother could be stubborn about getting to the root of a problem. “I don’t think I know anything. The things I think I know prove to be false.”

  “Now that the peanut gallery is gone, let’s get back to the part where you explain to me why Roni thinks you’re sleeping with her sister,” Robert insisted.

  There was nothing to do but tell him the truth. “According to Arthur Dwyer, I knew Katie Croft. He claims he has proof that not only did I know who she was, I spent a lot of time with her. She must have seen it by now, and notice how she didn’t come running back to me today.”

  “What kind of proof?” Robert asked.

  Tucker shrugged. “I would assume it’s photos and maybe correspondence. Apparently during the last few weeks at Kronberg, they had a PI following me.”

  “He could be lying,” Robert argued. “Photos can be faked. That report doesn’t mean anything.”

  “It does to Veronica since I never bothered to mention that I knew her sister.” He went back to the bench and his beer because he needed that damn beer. “She showed me pictures of Katie and I never told her we had a connection. Of course now I have no idea what our connection was, so her mind has gone to the worst possible place. To say I did not take the accusation well would be an understatement. And I know what she’s really worried about.”

  “She thinks you might have gotten her sister killed.” Robert whistled and sank down beside him. “Damn. I was hoping you’d been an asshole about her potentially outing you. I could work with that. I don’t know how to work with you might have killed her sister.”

  That neatly summed up the problem. “Katie was alive after I was taken to Argentina. But we don’t know that I didn’t come back. McDonald could have made planting that bomb my first assignment. And I was probably wiped a dozen times after that. I can’t know. I’ll probably never know, and that means this will always come between us.”

  “Unless I can prove who did it. Maybe the team should take a hard look at this case.”

  “Which team is that?” His brother wasn’t thinking logically. “Because we’re down a bunch of men. Sasha and Dante are dead and Jax is in jail. I think the team is pretty much you and me and Owen.”

  “And Ezra and Ariel and Rebecca and River.” Robert stared out over the yard. “All we have to do is call Theo and he’ll come with us. Don’t underestimate Buster. He can distract a person with his cuteness. Or his farts. That is one gassy dog.”

  “Like that rescue dog we had. Mom was always complaining that we needed to change Astro’s food.” The memory floated over him easily now that he wasn’t fighting for it. He let the vision of a big dog who always looked like he was smiling settle on him like a warm blanket. He could see the dog trying to lick him, remember how much he’d loved him. He’d walked into the shelter he’d volunteered at when he was in high school and immediately fallen in love with the massive ball of fluff.

  Robert was quiet for a moment. “Do you remember her at all? Mom?”

  “I remember she loved us. I remember her hugging me and begging me to bring you home.” Green hadn’t been willing to give their mother’s name up. He’d told them they could have that information when they released him. Naturally he’d tried to run an end around on the fucker. “I gave Adam everything we’ve learned, including the fact that I went to Hamilton High somewhere in Wyoming. There’s got to be something Green missed, some thread Adam can pull now that we know where to look.”

  “I should have started looking weeks ago.” Robert took a long swig of his beer. “I don’t know why I didn’t.”

  “Because you bought into Emily’s bullshit that we were all estranged.” For a man who was married to a psychologist, he wasn’t exactly self-aware. When his first wife had shown up in Munich she’d caused all sorts of chaos. One of the ways she’d manipulated Robert had been to tell him he no longer spoke to his mother or brother. All the while she’d known exactly who Tucker was to Robert and she’d kept it to herself. It was cruel, but then she’d sold her own husband to McDonald along with Robert’s whole unit.

  “I didn’t know any better,” Robert said quietly. “Kind of like you don’t know what happened between you and Katie Croft. Tell me something. Did Roni ask you to leave her alone?”

  Not exac
tly, but it had felt like rejection. “She said we’d moved too fast.”

  Robert chuckled. “Yeah, that ship sailed. You have a daughter. You have to deal with each other.”

  “That’s what I said.” Right before he’d walked away from her. “She was crying. A lot. I wanted to hug her and tell her everything would be all right, but I didn’t think she would accept that from me.”

  “Did you offer it to her?”

  He’d walked away because he’d been so angry. “No, but I did threaten her if she tried to keep me from seeing Violet. So there’s that.”

  Robert finally looked at him, a frown on his face, and then he shook his head and laughed. “Dumbass. All right. Let’s figure this out. You want to figure this out, right? Because if you don’t, this is an excellent off-ramp. You’ll have to decide how to co-parent when you’re not together, but otherwise this could be a clean break.”

  “God, no.” He’d sat up most of the night trying to find a way to take back the shit he’d said. “I don’t want to break up with her. I love her. I know that deep down. I loved her then. I was willing to risk everything to take her with me. I remember the feeling of looking down at her asleep in bed and knowing we were getting out. That had to be the day I got caught.”

  “And if Levi’s right and she’s the reason you got caught?”

  He shook his head. This was the easiest decision he’d made. “She didn’t mean to. She might have inadvertently tipped McDonald off, but she wouldn’t have betrayed me.”

  “You don’t know her, Tucker.”

  “But I do.” He wasn’t sure how to explain it. “It’s a feeling deep inside. I trust her. It’s the same way I trusted you when I first met you. I didn’t understand it at the time. I thought it was me being needy, but I knew you deep down. I know her, too. I reacted poorly. I can’t stand the thought of her not feeling the same way about me. I’m in a corner and I don’t know how to get out.”

  “Then we’ll figure it out together,” Robert promised.

  He wasn’t sure his brother was the best resource he had. “Or we could go to Ariel and ask her what to do.”