Collide

by Shelly Crane

  Then Danny burst through the door, knocking me into Merrick’s already close body, forcing him to catch me from toppling us both over. Danny was more surprised than we were, judging by his dropped jaw and wide eyes. We straightened up quickly, and Merrick immediately turned to leave, stopping at the door.

  “See you later, Sherry,” was his grand departure.

  “Bye,” was mine.

  Danny grinned from ear to ear, more from I-told-you-so than genuine happiness for me, I thought. I was still reeling from the past half hour of crammed emotions and shocking revelations, as I wiped my eyes with the sleeve of the hideous sweat shirt that was folded on the end of my bed. I stood still for a few minutes, eyes closed, settling myself, letting my breathing and heart rate slow.

  I was in no mood to have playful banter with Danny, and he could tell, because he settled into his cot and closed his eyes as I walked out without a word.

  If I thought doing dishes with him was going to be weird before, it would definitely be weird now but I hadn’t eaten supper either, so ditching dishes wouldn’t solve that one. It sounded pretty quiet as I tip toed into the hall and crept towards the kitchen. When I looked, the dishes were done. No way Merrick had time to do them. I was startled by the voice behind me.

  Merrick - No Touchy

  Chapter 8

  Oh! I actually touched her. She was so soft. Softer than I’d ever imagined possible. I just reached out and grabbed that sweet teary face. Tears she was crying because of me.

  What a jerk I was but she said she wasn’t mad, didn’t hate me, and she was telling the truth. I had no idea what to do. She was driving me every kind of human crazy. I wanted to just give in to my senses, but I also had a job to do. I wanted to ignore her but I knew I never could, and if I was honest and didn’t want to. I wanted to kiss her but how could I after what I’ve done? I wouldn’t even know what to do anyway. What would it be like to kiss her? Her lips were fascinating.

  And she smells so good. So, that’s what vanilla smells like. And her hair, curling around my fingers...

  What was I thinking? She must’ve thought I was crazy. Worse than crazy. She didn’t flinch away though, didn’t move. Her breathing even seemed to quicken like mine. Ah! Don’t get your hopes up, you were such an idiot.

  And Bobby. As much as I don’t like him what could I offer her that he couldn’t and more? He was a jerk but, any human would be better for her. Right?

  I shouldn’t have told her all of that. Things were just going to be weird between us. She did hug me though, but no, she was crying and just wanted comfort, just like Susan did that day. Humans act that way. These bodies were constantly in need of something. Comfort and compassion being a couple of them. Don’t read anything into it, fool.

  Driving back here from the store with her was unbearable. I could smell her the whole time and her hair was brushing my arm, her face against my arm and chest. Embarrassing, her having to teach me to drive and then me freaking out about it like that but I couldn’t seem to keep this bodies reactions under control.

  She actually thought I was repulsed by her. How could she ever think that? Of course, she had no idea how gorgeous she was. Gorgeous and cute, tiny. I just wanted to snatch her up and keep her behind me at all times, protected. My conscience doesn’t buzz for her because she wasn’t my charge but my heart does.

  I walked slowly to the laundry room to check on my clothes that I had put in the dryer earlier. It was hard to get these minds to focus on more than one thing at a time. Remembering to get your clothes later, remembering what time is lunch and dinner, remembering what day it is for chores.

  After I had a quick lesson on the washing machines knobs from Jeff, who had been shown by Bobby, folding clothes was pretty self explanatory but not everything was. Take cooking, for instance.

  I had to ask Lillian to show me how to turn on the oven and then which pans to use, ect. I had to read the instructions on every box and can on how to prepare it.

  I tried to mentally prepare myself for the awkwardness of doing the dishes with Sherry after that whole scene, after making a human fool of myself. I saw Susan finishing up the dishes in the kitchen.

  “Hey. That’s my job,” I said smiling.

  Human humor was strange to actually perform instead of listen to. I wasn’t sure if I was pulling it off correctly or not.

  “Hey. I thought it was Sherry’s. Just trying to make amends, ya know.”

  “It was supposed to be both of ours. She’s not angry at you, Susan. It was me. All me. I’m not...making this transition very pleasant for her I’m afraid,” I admitted pulling a soda can out of the fridge.

  Soda was one thing I had definitely grown to enjoy.

  “Well then, stop it. She’s very bright and brave and you can tell she cares about people. We just got off on the wrong foot, that’s all.”

  “Yes, she does care. She’s very...sweet.” I couldn’t help but smile as I thought back on things from Sherry’s past that she’s done.

  “Uhuh. I see...” Susan dragged her words out and I wasn’t sure what that meant but it didn’t sound reassuring as she lifted her eyebrow at me.

  “I’m just saying she’s...you know...one of those people that...really...try to...care about people.” I shook my head in frustration, unable to think of words to describe her accurately. “Anyway, she’s not mad at you, ok. She told me so herself. She’s not one to hold a grudge. So, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, I’m turning in for the night. Thanks for doing the dishes for us,” I said as I turned to leave.

  “Uhuh. You have a good night, Merrick.”

  “You too.”

  I wandered into the hall, back towards my room, which just so happened to hold Jeff across the hall from me. I saw him standing in his door frame and looking pensive, then I felt the tell tell fuzziness of him digging into my brain once again with his.

  You can stop that anytime, Jeffrey.

  I tried to keep the bite from my tone, barely managing.

  Can I? I thought you wanted our help, brother?

  “Not like that I don’t. I want your support. Brother.”

  Jeff pushed off the doorframe and followed me into my room on my heels, shutting the door behind him with force.

  “Well, I think you need my help more than ever.”

  “I’m fine.”

  “Are you? I’m sure this Sherry is a sweet girl. In fact, I know she is from seeing her in your memories but that’s just it, Merrick. She’s a girl. A human, mundane, and you’re not. How can I convince you how many levels of wrong this is?”

  “You don’t have to convince me of anything. I know. I had to make her aware of my feelings. She was upset because- well, you know why. I can’t deal with this too. I’m just trying to get through the day right now and keep my charges alive.”

  “Charges? You mean charge right? As in one charge, as in Danny.”

  “You know what? You have no idea what I’m going through so just back off, Jeff.” I all but gritted my teeth but he didn’t seem to notice.

  “I know I don’t but I can see what you feel and I can’t believe what I’m seeing. You would actually stay here with her if she accepted you. You say you don’t plan to actually do it but if she gave you the slightest hope, you’ll stay. I know you will.”

  “You’re probably right but I’ll never get that chance so stop worrying. Stay out of my head and tell the others to as well.”

  I pulled off my t-shirt and flung it on the chair along with my jeans. It didn’t occur to me that it might not be proper human etiquette, to undress down to boxers in front of another person, but I wasn’t feeling proper at the moment.

  “What about Piper?” he asked looking at me closely.

  “What about her?” I asked quietly as I sat on the edge of my bed.

  “You know what about her. She chose you, Merrick. That’s rare. You’re lucky. Most female Keepers don’t choose at all, you know this.” He spread his palms, making my jaw twitch with my need
for him to leave. “It’s a great honor for her to make such a leap of faith on you instead of waiting for you to do it and you are turning her down for something you can never have.”

  “I have no personal interest in Piper.”

  “This isn’t about her body is it?” he asked me incredulously. “Because you know that won’t matter once we go home.”

  “No, I don’t care how old her body is. This is about her. Actually it’s not about her, it’s about me.”

  “Merrick. Come on!” he said throwing his hands up in frustration.

  “She’s-” I tried to think of a word that wouldn’t be a lie but came up with nothing. “-great and I know it’s an honor but I’ve made up my mind. I won’t settle. It’s my life, especially now that I’m literally alive to live it. God gave me free will and I intend to use it. I mean it, Jeff. Stay out of my head and let me worry about myself. You and I are the same age, you know that.”

  “Yes I do and you would think that after living thousands of years you’d be a little smarter.”

  “I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but I promise you I don’t need or want your help on this. Good night, Jeffrey,” I said and pulled the covers over my head as I laid down. “Turn out the light would you, on your way out.”

  I heard him sigh and the click of the light switch before I was plunged into darkness. I laid there thinking about what he said and knowing he was right but not caring. Who would I hurt but myself if I stayed here and kept watching Sherry, even if I couldn’t have her?

  I hoped Sherry went to bed when she saw the dishes done. Maybe I should’ve checked on her... No. She was fine. I just worried about Bobby messing with her. He was persistent, I’d give him that. I would check on her in a little bit.

  I wondered if I could watch Sherry fall in love with someone else. I wondered how noble I’d be to let her live her life. I knew I could, if that’s what she wanted, but...

  I wondered if I should explain to Piper again that it isn’t anything personal with her. I just couldn’t be content with someone when I was completely in love with someone else.

  No, I don’t think so. They didn’t understand. The first conversation along those lines didn’t go so well anyway. She was the strangest Keeper I’d ever met.

  Friend or Foe?

  Chapter 9

  “I did the dishes. Peace offering?”

  Susan was standing behind me, startling me as I entered the kitchen.

  “Susan, I’m not angry with you, please don’t think that. I’m just rounding out a very stressful few days. I’m sorry.”

  “I understand that. I talked to Merrick, your Keeper, well your brother’s Keeper. He explained that he’d been kinda driving you crazy, and it was his fault. You know Sherry, I think that boy, well that...guardian, likes you.” She spoke slowly and sounded like she thought it would be something new to me, like she was exposing some revelation.

  All I could do was chuckle and avert my eyes innocently, what else could I do? Tell her he was in love with me? She chuckled too a little.

  “I’m sorry,” I reiterated.

  “Me too.”

  She turned to go back to her room and I stayed in the kitchen for some quiet but not completely silent dinner, with the humming appliances to keep me company. I wished someone would come in with me but then I changed my mind when someone did.

  Bobby came waltzing in reminding me of Matt and all his arrogance.

  “Hey there, girly.”

  “Hey,” I muttered under my breath.

  “Late dinner?”

  “Yep. I like it quiet so...” Lies, but I didn’t think he could tell.

  “Me too.”

  Not taking the hint yet again, he plopped himself up on the countertop across from me. He was slightly pudgy, but not in an off putting way, just stocky. His hair was very light brown and straight, perfectly brushed, as in he brushed his hair to meet me here. Great. I was determined to take my bowl of macaroni and cheese and head to my room but he stopped me with his leg outstretched.

  “Where you going?”

  “I told ya, I like quiet. I’m heading to my room to eat my dinner. It’s been a very long day, I’m tired.”

  “Why don’t you come hang out in my room? We can talk, while you eat?” He waggled his eyebrows, flashing a smile.

  “No thanks. I’ll just-”

  “Ah, come on,” he interrupted still smiling.

  “Bobby,” a new voice called his name. His Keeper, Jeff, a stout and muscular, obscenely good looking black man with a deep and pelting voice. Very Darius from Hootie and the Blowfish. “Come on, leave her alone. It’s late.”

  Bobby left without another word which surprised the heck out of me.

  “Sorry about him. We haven’t been formally introduced yet. I’m Jeffrey. Jeff,” he said as he extended his hand.

  “Sherry.” I smiled and took his rough hand thinking the previous owner to that body must have been in construction too.

  “Ah...so, you’re Sherry,” he drawled like he didn’t know, backing himself up to lean on the fridge, propping one foot behind him.

  “Hmm. So you can read his mind all the time, or just when he lets you?”

  I knew exactly what he was referring to and it didn’t quite seem fair to me, thoughts should be private.

  “Only when we try.” He looked slightly amused at my directness. “I’m sorry, Sherry. We just saw him struggling and thought if we knew what it was, we could help. We never would have guessed what it was though. He tried to hide it from us, if that helps?”

  “Ok. So why is Piper so upset about it? What’s it to her?”

  “Well, what worried us most was his want to stay here. You see we can live perfectly human and natural for as long as the body does but when the body dies, he dies. His thought was that he wanted to stay in his human body...for you.”

  That shocked me. Why would Merrick give up his life for me? It’s not like we’d ever live to see that day anyway, but it shook me up none the less.

  “Ok, so my question, why does Piper care? You explained it rationally and calmly and she didn’t look either of those when she snatched him away the other day.”

  He rubbed his chin in contemplation before answering, which reassured me. At least I know he was thinking about it and not just placating me.

  “When we are done with our job, when we wish to be through with being a Keeper, we retire so to speak. We don’t have mates like you do. It’s not physical for us, but most of us find our so called ‘mate’ at that point and we just spend the rest of our days together. Piper is upset because she feels that, that kind of contentment is more valuable that what you could give him here.”

  “So Piper wants to give him that…that kind of love.”

  “Well, not right this second, Keepers don’t work that way. One day maybe and it’s not really love, we just have an understanding, enjoy each others company. It’s just such a wonderful thing for us, to live in peace together. It’s hard to see your side versus ours. I mean, here you fight and hurt each other, leave each other, among other things. And sex is so common, it’s not anything special to anyone anymore. It’s something for fun and just seems to cause even more problems.”

  “Not to me it isn’t but we don’t even know if we are gonna make it through all this, so can we back up a step? Why are we talking like this is something that is actually going to happen? I don’t have expectations for Merrick. I just found out a few hours ago that he loved me instead of loathed me. Though, I didn’t know then that he had the option to stay,” I heard myself barely breathe those last words as they sunk in.

  “It’s not really an option. It’s a decision. An indefinite one.”

  “Jeff, I’m not gonna try to talk him into staying with me, ok. I don’t even understand to begin with. I mean, why would he want me when he can have what your talking about?”

  I figured there was no reason to be coy. He had been in Merrick’s head and seen it all so there was no reason to
pretend any different.

  “Love does funny things.”

  “Yes, but do you love in the same way as I do? Can you?”

  “We have free will, just like everyone else. We choose how to live our lives, when we want to be done with a chapter we start a new one.”

  “Hmm... That doesn’t exactly answer my question but ok, I guess that’s all I’m gonna get?” I lifted my eyebrows but he stayed silent. I nodded knowingly. “Thanks for helping with Bobby...and trying to explain everything to me. I think I’m gonna turn in.”

  “Ok.”

  “Nice talking to you, Jeff.”

  “You too, Sherry... He does love you, ya know.” He sprung that on me as I crossed the doorway. “Like what you’re talking about. I can’t understand or define it myself but he does.”

  I took a deep breath and I knew the truth.

  “I know. I can’t be lied to,” I stated and shrugged.

  He eyed me curiously but smiled as I walked out with my cold again pasta. There should be a sign posted in the kitchen, ‘No Hot Meals’.

  They must have figured out how to turn the light timers off because they didn’t wake me in the morning. Thankfully. I was beaten, emotionally beaten and exhausted. The restless sleep last night did nothing to help that fact.

  I couldn’t stop thinking about how quickly my feelings for Merrick had taken off. It was not for his professing his love for me either. I mean, Bobby and Matt did that and I couldn’t make myself even like them anymore. It was just hard to believe that someone like him would care for me. How had he watched me and still wanted to be with me, seeing all my embarrassing mannerisms and...ugh, the list could go on for days of things I’d rather Merrick had not seen.