Letters From the Heart

by Kay Bea

  If you find yourself in need of a respite, you and Lady Amelia are welcome to join me at Pemberley as soon as you find it convenient to do so. I have written to Lady Catherine and the Addisons inviting them to join us though I suspect it will not be possible as Anne is approaching her confinement, and I shall issue the same invitation to our Fitzwilliam relatives whilst I am in town. The presence of the Bennet sisters has quite nearly ruined my affection for solitude, and I find I prefer the halls of Pemberley when they are filled with the sounds of family.

  Until then, I remain…

  Your cousin,

  Fitzwilliam Darcy

  May 19, 1814

  Grey Manor, Derbyshire

  Dear Anne,

  I write with news that I hope will bring you even a portion of the joy with which it is relayed. Fitzwilliam has asked me to be his wife, and I have accepted! He is even now in Hertfordshire seeking my father’s blessing. We are to be married on June 21. My only regret is that you will not be present on that happiest of days.

  I know you are wishing to learn more of the proposal and I shall keep you in suspense no longer. Once Mary and I arrived at Pemberley, I quickly resumed my habit of walking the grounds every morning and, when the weather and my sisters allowed, again in the late afternoon. It seemed no matter where my wandering feet might take me, I was nearly always joined at some time by Fitzwilliam. It was not long before Mary began the habit of walking out with me. She made a very diligent chaperone, and I hope one day to return the favour. Our little game continued for many weeks, and Fitzwilliam was careful to never ask more of me than I was prepared to give.

  Five days past, I was forced to surrender my walk due to a thunderstorm, and I retreated to the library instead. Once again, Fitzwilliam found me. He told me later he had been forced to bribe our younger sisters to keep Mary occupied so she would not follow him to the library. We stayed there together, watching the storm for several minutes before your cousin stepped in front of me. He began awkwardly explaining what he had wished to do that day. Then he began to speak such words of devotion and love as to make me weep. He paused only long enough to kneel before me, grasp both my hands in his, and kiss them.

  When he asked me to be his wife, I could at first barely whisper my reply, then the words came tumbling from my lips, “yes, yes, a thousand times yes.” Once the words began, I was filled with such joy, such lightness, that I could not help but laugh. I wish I could describe for you the happiness that fairly radiated from his face or the way he was utterly transformed by the smile that graced his countenance. I have loved him for so long, Anne.

  Though I could never acknowledge it before, I believe I have loved him almost from the beginning, and I had not dared to hope I could know such joy as for him to love me in return. I am truly the most fortunate of women.

  Perhaps I should have allowed your cousin to relay our news, but I found I simply could not keep it to myself. He may tell the rest of his family, but I shall claim the rights of friendship in alerting you. Oh, I must thank you a thousand times for all you have done. If not for you and your family, I might never have survived my cousin and never would have found love with yours.

  Your future cousin,

  Elizabeth

  May 21, 1814

  Longbourn, Hertfordshire

  Dear Bingley,

  I shall not bore you by repeating news you have already heard from Elizabeth. Of my engagement, I can only ask one question of you: How did you ever manage a proposal under the watchful eye of Miss Mary? I managed a private audience with Elizabeth only after successfully bribing Georgiana and Miss Lydia with the promise of music and ribbons in exchange for their assistance. The girls then contrived to distract the eldest Miss Bennet with a promise of new music. It was then but the work of a moment to be relieved of our guardian’s presence. I shall never confess it to another, but I would have gladly given more to gain those precious minutes. As Miss Mary will soon be a resident of my household and under my protection, I can only hope to one day repay her kindness in the same fashion in which it was rendered.

  As you see from the direction on this letter, I remain at Longbourn with Mr Bennet where I have been these past few days, save a brief sojourn to town to retrieve the settlement and deliver the happy news to my relations. In the course of my visit, I have learnt some news that may be of interest to your, and very soon to be my, family. It seems Mrs Bennet will soon be without even the company of her sister Philips, who is now her only regular visitor. In recent months, word has begun to spread throughout Meryton of Mr Philips’s role in effecting Elizabeth’s marriage to Mr Collins, and as might be imagined, the news has been received in a rather poor light. With his clientele dwindling, Mr Philips has found himself obliged to sell his practice, and he will move south with his wife to Somerset. I am given to understand that Mrs Philips perceives herself as quite the victim in all this, blaming her husband and sister in equal measure while seeming to forget her earlier approval of the ill-fated match.

  As to Mrs Bennet, I had the distinct misfortune to encounter that lady on my return from town. She was applying to her husband for more funds. I found her to be as unrepentant and vulgar as she has ever been, and I was perversely pleased to hear her lamentations as her request was denied. I think she at least suspects the reason for my presence as she began fawning over my person in a most ridiculous manner almost the moment she noticed me. She also suffers from the misapprehension that her daughter will now be in want of her advice. I am thankful I shall not have to endure her presence for the duration of my engagement as I believe I could not long be civil to the person responsible for Elizabeth’s pain. As a precaution, I have sent word to Pemberley that Mrs Bennet is not to be admitted to the house under any circumstances in my absence.

  I shall depart Longbourn for Pemberley on Monday and shall call at Grey Manor the day after I arrive to collect Georgiana and whichever of the Bennet sisters wishes to join her. If you are feeling generous, perhaps you might also allow me a few moments with my betrothed.

  Your future brother,

  Fitzwilliam Darcy

  July 1, 1814

  Pemberley, Derbyshire

  Madam,

  I have in my possession the ill-thought missive you presumed to send my wife on the occasion of our marriage, and I find myself obligated to respond on her behalf.

  Not only were you not invited to the wedding, as you so politely mentioned, you will also find you will not be invited to any of our homes whilst I am living. I find it utterly reprehensible that you would disown your child for failing to produce an heir for that monster to whom you sold her, only to embrace her when it became evident her wealth and consequence might be of some benefit to yourself. It is your selfishness—your utter disdain for the feelings of others—that has convinced me you are the last person in the world I should be tempted to acknowledge. Can you possibly believe that any consideration would tempt me to tolerate the woman who has been the means of nearly destroying not only the happiness, but very nearly the life, of my beloved wife? I have every reason in the world to think ill of you. No motive can excuse the unjust and ungenerous part you played in orchestrating Elizabeth’s disastrous marriage to Mr Collins. Nor can any excuse be made for your behaviour towards her since.

  Elizabeth may one day wish to know you again, and though I can never encourage her in this, I shall not prevent her from doing so. Until she makes such a desire known to you, it is left to me to protect her, and I shall insist that every letter from your hand be consigned to flames before it even crosses her desk. And know this, Mrs Bennet—you will never have my good opinion, and I shall do everything in my power to assure you do not benefit in any material way from your daughter’s newfound position.

  Find a new home for your pleading and schemes. They are not welcome here.

  Fitzwilliam Darcy

  August 14, 1814

  Pemberley, Derbyshire

  Dear Papa,

  Your letter was timed perfectly
as we have only just returned from our wedding tour in Scotland. What a wild and beautiful country that is!

  I know I may speak for my husband when I say of course you and Lydia must come to us as soon as may be and stay until you weary of our company. I shall hear no more of your protests regarding the newness of my marriage as an excuse to stay away. At the mention of your letter this morning, Georgiana proclaimed it to be absolutely necessary that she should see Lydia again, and Fitzwilliam informed me there is a game of chess yet to be completed between the two of you. So there you have it: you must come, for now it is both a matter of honour and an easy way of securing the happiness of your daughters.

  For you, I know this need not be said, but if my mother should happen upon this letter I wish to be clear she is not included in the invitation.

  Your happily married daughter,

  Elizabeth

  September 7, 1814

  Pemberley, Derbyshire

  Dear Uncle,

  How can I thank you for your guidance and forbearance these past years? While I often turn to Richard for a brother’s advice, I look to you when I am need of a father’s wisdom.

  I find myself more content than I ever dared hope I could be. Georgiana is increasingly lively, and she is refining the art of teasing even as she learns to be teased. Mary’s improvement is remarkable. You did not know her before so you have nothing in way of comparison, but I assure you she has not always been as she is now. With the presence of my beloved Elizabeth, we have become a family, and life once again fills the halls of this home.

  There is no sound more dear to me than that of Elizabeth’s laughter, and I am privileged to hear it every day. Tell me, Uncle, who am I to deserve such joy?

  Your nephew,

  Fitzwilliam Darcy

  November 26, 1814

  Pemberley, Derbyshire

  Dearest Jane,

  Had anyone told me last year that I would now be so happily settled in a new life, I would have pronounced them ready for Bedlam. I now understand your words when you asked how anyone could be so happy. It is indeed far, far too much.

  I am given to understand that I am now back in favour with Mama. I think it is not me but rather my husband’s fortune that has won her over. I fear she shall not soon be in favour with either Mr Darcy or myself. Neither of us is quite willing to forgive her behaviour of the past year. Though I would not wish to be forever at odds, I do not see any possible way to return to civility.

  But now to happier subjects. My dearest Fitzwilliam has made me whole. He has made me feel valued and loved. We do not always agree; indeed, with two such opinionated, out-spoken people in the house, such a thing would be nearly impossible. But when we disagree, there is no unkindness or disrespect between us. Even then, even when we are at odds, there is love.

  Our family party is usually made up of Georgiana, Mary, and the two of us. We would welcome Lydia at any time, as I know you would. For now, she seems content to divide her time among three households. I believe she rather enjoys having our father’s attentions for herself.

  I am delighted to now inform you that you must be the first to wish me joy—we are to welcome another to our family in the spring. It is, perhaps, too early to share our news, but I find I cannot restrain myself. The newest Darcy is expected to make an appearance in late May or early June.

  Dear, dear, Jane, how magnificently different is my life now from what I ever imagined. We do not do anything extraordinary. In fact, we are quite dull, I suspect. We read, we walk out together, the girls and I play the pianoforte, we talk, and we sometimes play cards. But the most astonishing thing, Jane, the most wonderful, delightful thing is that we laugh. Oh, Jane, how we laugh.

  Your incandescently happy sister,

  Elizabeth Darcy

  July 12, 1820

  Pemberley, Derbyshire

  Dearest Mary,

  I know you are anxious for news, and as our father is not likely to remember to write for some weeks, I shall not keep you in suspense. Papa and Fitzwilliam are safely returned to Pemberley. Papa is well settled, and to the surprise of none, he has established his place in both the library and the nursery. Bennet and Andrew are quite as much in love with him as ever, and I daresay it will be no small task to remind my children that they must share their grandfather whilst their cousins are visiting.

  Fitzwilliam is quite confident that you and Mr Carson will do well at Longbourn, as is Papa. If he did not believe you both capable, he would not have bestowed the estate on you. I believe you love Longbourn the best of all of us, and I am so grateful you will continue to do so as its new mistress. We look forward to imposing on your hospitality as often as possible.

  It is very good of Mr Carson to include a stop at Pemberley on your wedding trip. I only hope you are not too scandalised when you arrive. Papa says he will not wear mourning for his wife when amongst only his family. He has declared that he spent these past six years grieving the loss of the woman he thought to be his wife, and now he considers his mourning complete. I confess to following his example in this. Mama has been lost to me for many years, and her physical passing brought only release to my spirit. I did try, even to the very end. But Mama would do naught but cast blame at my feet, and I find I cannot be sorry such trials are at an end. I am done with grieving her loss.

  If your visit comes as planned, we shall all be together in a few weeks’ time. Poor Fitzwilliam—to have to endure all five Bennet sisters at once. At least now, he has brothers to share the experience. Georgiana is most interested in meeting your husband. She is recovering well from Henry’s birth and expects to be fit to travel in good time to see you arrived. Of course, Jane and Charles will come with Charlie, Hannah, and Thomas. They live so near us as to make travel quite easy even with the children. Catherine and Stephen wish to come for several days now as it will be quite impossible for her to make the journey in a few more months.

  Oh! I nearly forgot—Fitzwilliam has invited Lydia’s betrothed at the time you are to be here! You will at last meet Lord Ashcroft. Could you ever have imagined our sister becoming Lady Ashcroft? I know I could not, and Lydia tells me she had no more idea of becoming a Lady than she did of being the last of her sisters to marry. No matter how grand she becomes with her marriage, she will always be Lyddie to me.

  There will be one more for you to meet as well. I believe your newest niece or nephew will arrive in just a few days. Bennet and Andrew have declared they wish for a sister, and as they do not wish for a brother at this time, any boy will have to be sent back from whence he came. I believe my dear husband also hopes for a girl this time. I wish only for the child to make itself known.

  I must close now. The boys are begging for a story, and I feel very much in need of a walk. I cannot wait to see you, dear one!

  Your affectionate sister,

  Elizabeth Darcy

  July 13, 1820

  Mary,

  Your sister is quite exhausted and has asked that I post this letter as she was not able to do so before our darling Marianne made her debut in this world. She has her mother’s eyes.

  Affectionately,

  F.D.

  November 26, 1841

  Pemberley, Derbyshire

  My Beloved Fitzwilliam,

  As I do every year on this day, I am reflecting on how very fortunate I am to love and be loved by you. After all this time, I am still in awe of the love we share and the life we have made. I cannot imagine a better man, a better father for my children, or a better husband than I have found in you. You have been my protector, my lover, and my best friend, and I cherish all we have together.

  Together in these many years, we watched as our sisters fell in love and became wives and mothers. We wept as we mourned the loss of Lady Catherine, my father, and those little lives lost before they were begun. Together we trembled with fear and laughed with joy as we watched our children grow from tiny infants to bickering siblings and finally to brilliant adults. This year we have seen our d
ear Marianne become a wife and witnessed Andrew take over Summerton as its new master. I find it fitting that this day made us grandparents as Bennet and Lady Margaret became parents, and we welcomed the next generation of Darcys to Pemberley.

  I have always considered this day to be an anniversary of sorts. It was on this day that we each made judgments and choices that would forever alter our lives. And while some might look upon the occasion with regret, I find I can only look on the date with fondness. It was that night we shared our first dance. It was the first time I felt the warmth of your hand through my glove, the first time I admired your form, the first time I truly wished for you to think well of me, and though I had not yet learnt, it was then that I began to love you. I shall always treasure this date because, however twisted the road became, the twenty-sixth of November marked the beginning of a journey that led my heart to yours.