The Social Media Murder Corp

by Stephen Signorelli

  Destruction was now on a treadmill, speed set at 7 mph and a 20 degree incline.

  “That bag piss you off sis?” she asked laughing as she started to run on the treadmill.

  Danger gave a final roundhouse kick to the bag and stood back, panting.

  “Yeah it looked at my boobs!” she laughed.

  “Well I can see why, they are awesome!” Destruction said with a grin.

  “Aww, you are the best!” Danger said, blowing a kiss to her sister. She got on the treadmill next to her and set it for the same speed and incline.

  “I’ve been thinking, about that AMA,” Danger said.

  “Oh? What about it?” Destruction replied.

  “Despite the fact that it sorta went off the rails, it was a great way to interact with people. We should do that more often, I was thinking how about we do a You Tube show?”

  “Wait, you want to do a You Tube show? Like, what kind?”

  “Just a show where we answer fan mail, review movies, maybe cook food, do sketch comedy, that sorta stuff.”

  Destruction laughed.

  “Just the two of us huh? You want to stage, film, edit, and upload a show that only the two of us can work on?”

  “Well DUH yeah, we have to keep our super-secret identities!”

  “I KNOW we have to doo doo head! It just will be a lot of work, that’s all.”

  “So? It will be fun! And OMG YOU are the doo doo head!” Danger laughed as she punched her sister in the arm.

  “Well ok, but it’s not something we can film like every week. We have homework and after school stuff and taking care of Auntie Yuki and all.”

  “I know, we can just do it whenever we feel like it!”

  “Well ok then, just make sure we don’t promise something we can’t deliver, like that fat lying Harry Knowles moron.”

  “OMG I know, good lord I heard he smells like pee!”

  “Ewww!” Destruction laughed.

  “This will be fun, we can showcase our other talents besides killing stuff and blowing shit up!”

  “I’m not going to sing sis, just want to throw that out there right now,” Destruction said flatly.

  “Yes yes, we all know Destruction hates to sing,” Danger said while rolling her eyes, “

  “I sing in church!” Destruction countered.

  “That’s different cause God doesn’t care what you sound like!”

  “OMG You are such a doo doo head!” Destruction shot back.

  “You head has the most doo doo of all!” Danger countered.

  The girls laughed at themselves as they ran on the treadmill.

  The continued to talk, joke, laugh, and call each other doo doo head for an hour as they ran. Finally, the finished their workout and stepped off the treadmills.

  “So this show, what do you have in mind?”

  Danger thought for a moment.

  “Papa’s favorite show, remember? That old Czech variety show?”

  “Country Estrada?” Destruction answered.

  “Yes! I wanna do something like that!” Danger said happily.

  “Destruction shook her head.

  “How? It’s not like we can hold auditions and such, it’s just you and I.”

  Danger frowned.

  “Yeah, I guess you are right. Maybe just some sort of sketch comedy show. OH MY GOD remember that old MTV show Sifl and Olly? We can do that! Like sock puppets of us instead of the real us!”

  “Sock puppets?” Destruction laughed.

  “Totally! Well, not for the whole show just a segment. Like something where I interview some sort of sock puppet that represents someone else, and you do the voice.”

  Destruction laughed and threw her arms in the air.

  “Why the fuck not? You know I can’t say no to you!”

  Danger rushed forward put her sisters head in her hands. She smiled and looked into her eyes.

  “Make love to me,” she said softly.

  “Ok,” Destruction whispered.

  Danger scooped up her sister and carried her to their bedroom.

  That evening

  As Destruction slept, Danger got up and made her way to the kitchen. She opened the fridge and poured herself some milk and grabbed a Pop Tart. She walked back to their bedroom silently, as to not wake her sister up. She sat at her desk and began to quietly eat her snack when she noticed the small email indicator blinking on her laptop. She smiled, Danger loved getting and answering fan mail. She opened the official SMMC email client and began to read the message. As she read her eyes narrowed and an evil grin formed on her face.

  “You want to throw down huh? Ok dude, your funeral,” she thought to herself. She typed out a small message in reply to the sender:

  Challenge accepted. ID phrase: Poison Clan rocks the world.

  Danger closed the laptop and finished her snack in silence. She walked silently into the bathroom and brushed her teeth. She finished and got back into the king sized bed the twins shared. She snuggled up to her sister, who instinctively wrapped her legs around her. Kissing the top of Destruction’s head, Danger’s eyes glowed red in the darkness.

  She loved a good fight.

  END PART THREE

  PART FOUR

  The bridge was old and in the middle of nowhere, spanning a river no one even remembered existed. This place was not on any map, as far as the sole current occupant of the bridge knew. Actually, the bridge looked like it hadn’t been serviced in decades, which is exactly why he chose it. He wanted what was about to happen to take place far from anyone’s prying eyes.

  It was a dreary day, and mist covered the bridge. He peered over the side to the river below, which he could not see due to the fog like mist which had covered the area. He leaned back against the front fender of his car. He was parked at the south end of the bridge, his old Ford Crown Victoria parked on the small shoulder. Weeds grew through cracks in the bridges concrete, which either showed a total lack of quality build or the ravages of age and neglect, he was not positive which was true.

  He reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a small pack of Camel cigarettes, unfiltered. He pulled on out and lit it, drawing the smoke into his lungs. His cigarette habit had grown a lot in the past year, but he no longer cared. His years as an Army Ranger were behind him now, and his work at the State Department, which had started out promising enough, had collapsed spectacularly, thanks to the SMMC.

  Ah the SMMC, those twin duo of Danger and Destruction, now confirmed as female. The two nightmares which had destroyed his life his marriage, and his career. He had been chasing those phantoms for a year now, and his utter and complete failure at it had ensured his career at the State Department would now be over. But he didn’t care anymore. Today was the day it ended, one way or another. Today he killed them or they killed him, both outcomes were acceptable.

  He wasn’t sure if they would read his email, let alone respond to it. To his surprise they did both, and accepted his challenge. Today, it ended on this bridge, this was now certain.

  He was true to his word. He informed no one else and brought no back up. He had considered using guns, but given the 2 to 1 odds against him, he decided to go old school: swords. He challenged the twins to an old school sword fight. Part of him was convinced they would just snipe him from a distance. He felt the large army duffel back resting against his leg. Inside were two katana blades. He had been trained in dual wielding as he studied martial arts during his life, he actually had wanted to try out for the Olympic fencing team. He felt the simple elegance of a sword was a more chivalrous weapon than a gun, despite his Army Ranger background. This was probably due to his years as a child and teen in Japan, where his father was stationed in the Army. He had grown up devouring martial arts films, especially Shaw Brothers.

  He glanced at his watch, it was time for them to arrive. He leaned back against his car and puffed on his cigarette. He didn’t know what to expect. He had originally assumed the SMMC were highly trained former Special Forc
es of some nation, but the revelation that they were female had thrown doubt into his mind. Oh he knew there were ferocious female military types in the world, especially in Israel and Russia, and he sort of expected this to be the case here. He also had this feeling he would experience nothing here today except a sudden impact to his skull, a brief moment of pain, then darkness for all times.

  The mist was covering the bridge almost completely now. He glanced at his watch, it WAS time, where were they. Just at that moment he heard faint voices in the mist. His heartrate increased and the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. He listened closer as the voices grew louder. He tried to make out what they were…..singing?

  Two fearless warriors

  Marching off to war

  Fighting for glory

  Who could ask for more

  When we come home

  Our families will sing our praise

  For our nation

  Our battle standards we raise

  Oh my loved one

  Please don’t cry for me

  For we go forth

  To achieve our victory

  Before him, two young girls wearing backpacks came marching out of the mist, singing some sort of tune in a language he didn’t recognize. The girl on the left had long chestnut brown hair and stood about five foot 4. The girl on the right had short dark brown hair, parted to the left and stood the same height. The held hands as they sang happily. He watched in bewilderment as the two girls marched right up to him and snapped a salute and smiled.

  “Hi! Did you like our song? We wrote it!”

  “It’s in Khmer, in case you didn’t recognize it.”

  “Oh its misty out isn’t it!”

  “Yeah it’s spooky, like that Stephen King book: The Mist!”

  “That has like half the cast of the Walking Dead in the film doesn’t it?”

  “Yeah totally!”

  The man blinked, he was unsure of what was happening here.

  “Oh come look over the side of the bridge!!”

  The two girls ran over to the side of the bridge and peered down into the mist below.

  “Oh scary!”

  The man’s brain snapped back to reality.

  “Hey you two, that isn’t safe you might fall!”

  “Oh pfft!” one of the girls said, sticking out her tongue at the man.

  The two girls walked back to face the man and smiled at him.

  “Hi again!”

  The man couldn’t believe this as happening. This bridge was supposed to be pretty much deserted.

  “Where did you two come from? This bridge is dangerous, you shouldn’t be here. Where are your parents?”

  “Why are YOU here?” the longer haired girl asked with a smile.

  “I’m a bridge inspector for the state, this bridge is structurally unsafe so I am here to study it so it can be rebuilt.”

  “It looks pretty safe to me, the concrete doesn’t have any cracks and the support system seems to be ok,” the short haired girl said with a grin.

  “What? Well whatever, where are your parents and why are you here? You should leave.”

  “I don’t think you are a bridge inspector!”

  “Yeah I bet you are like a drug dealer and you are waiting for your delivery or something!”

  “Yeah we walked into a scene right out of Breaking Bad!”

  The man rolled his eyes.

  “Yes you caught me, I am a big time meth dealer and I am waiting for Walter White to show up so I can buy some meth off of him. Jesse is bringing me some donuts too. Happy now?”

  “Can we have some donuts?”

  “Yeah can we?”

  “What? NO! There aren’t any donuts! Look, I have my reasons for being here and I don’t need to explain them to two 14 year old looking girls. Normally I would be concerned about where your parents are but right now I do NOT have the time so just please, go away!”

  “Poison Clan rocks the world,” Danger said softly.

  The man froze. His world, and his eternity, stood still.

  “What did you just say?” he said quietly.

  “Poison Clan rocks the world,” Destruction said with a grin.

  The man looked at the two smiling teen agers standing before him. His mind was in over drive. This couldn’t be them, these kids were a trap, a set-up, the SMMC were in the mist, waiting to gun him down.

  “This is a very dangerous situation you have been placed in. Get into my car, I will get you both out of here safely.”

  Danger laughed.

  “You’re silly.”

  “Danger I don’t think he believes us,” Destruction said.

  “Oh, yeah I don’t think he does.”

  The man stared wide eyed at the girls. It couldn’t be, there was no way, it was impossible.

  “It can’t be,” he finally whispered.

  “Oh it’s true, it’s damn true!” Danger said with a laugh.

  “Yeah dude, it’s like totally us,” Destruction said with a grin.

  “The Social Media Murder Corp, in the flesh!” Danger said happily.

  “Children…..” the man muttered.

  “Hey now! I will have you know we are both 14! That is hardly what I would call a child!” Destruction said with a frown.

  “Yeah! We will be in high school next year! Freshmen! That’s hardly childish!” Danger added.

  “Kids do grow up fast these days,” Destruction said thoughtfully.

  “Yeah probably due to all the Monsanto chemicals in our foods. Growth hormones and stuff,” Danger added.

  The man sat on the hood of his car with a blank look on his face.

  “How?” he asked.

  “Oh we were born this way.”

  “Yeah totally, it’s what we do.”

  “Yeah dude, it’s why we are here. It’s our purpose.”

  “Yeah, like how some people are born to make art or sing or fix stuff? We were born to kill.”

  “And blow stuff up!”

  “Totally, we totally are good at blowing stuff up.”

  “This can’t be happening. It can’t be possible,” the man said with a sigh.

  “Flapping your arms and flying is impossible dude!”

  “Yeah even though I did try it once,” Danger admitted.

  “Oh my God yeah you totally jumped off the roof and flapped your arms yelling ‘to the skies’ and fell and cut your knee! Mommy was so angry!”

  “Yeah she was,” Danger admitted.

  “You’re the SMMC,” the man finally said.

  “Oh my God dude that is what we have been trying to tell you for the past like two hours or something!”

  “Yeah! Poison Clan rocks the world! How many times do I have to repeat it?!”

  “You are 14, how the fuck is this possible? How the hell are you doing all of this? How are you remaining anonymous? How are you managing to sneak explosives into buildings in New York City? How are you able to elude the combined efforts of every agency of the Government of the United States of America? How the FUCK did you stage a military style attack on a shopping mall BY YOURSELVES? How the hell did you get trained? Where did you learn all of this? WHY are you doing it? You should be in school, taking selfies, listening to music, getting worked up over boys, NOT killing hundreds of people.”

  “We do all of those things you just mentioned,” Danger stated.

  “Yeah except the boy stuff, boys are icky,” Destruction added.

  “Totally icky,” Danger chimed in.

  “As to how we were trained or how we are able to do the things we do, sorry dude, it’s a secret.”

  “Yeah if we told you we would have to kill you!”

  “Well, we ARE going to kill you anyway, but we still won’t tell,” Destruction stated.

  The man took out another cigarette from his shirt pocket and lit it. He took a long drag of it and stared up into the sky.

  “Outsmarted by teenagers. That will be my legacy. How fitting of an end to a career that cra
shed and burned so hard.”

  “It’s not so bad, it’s not like you ever had a chance at catching us,” Danger said reassuringly.

  “Yeah, you had no chance, but you still put in the effort. That counts for a lot,” Destruction said smiling.

  “Does it?” the man asked, “No one will ever know. I can’t fight you because despite what you did, you are still children to me, and I will not raise a weapon against you. Just let me finish my cigarette then kill me. Please make it fast and clean.”

  Danger shook her head.

  “Oh no, you challenged us and we made this trip all the way out here to the middle of nowhere, we are going to have a throw down.”

  “Yeah. I mean, killing you in cold blood is no big deal, we’ve done that a lot. But you don’t deserve it.”

  “I don’t deserve anything,” the man said as he smoked.

  Danger frowned.

  “Look, look at us. What do you see?”

  The man looked at the girls.

  “Two girls who should be enjoying their lives as teenagers and not committing mass murder,” he said.

  “Ok, but what DON’T you see?” Danger asked.

  The man looked at them puzzled.

  “Wait….where are the robes? The masks?”

  “Exactly!” Destruction said, clapping her hands.

  “Yup, you are the first and only person who will ever see our true selves and know who we are,” Danger cheered.

  “That’s right. We decided since you are going to die anyway, we would totally reveal ourselves to you, as a sign of respect.”

  The man took another drag of his cigarette.

  “I see.”

  “My name is Danger, it is the name of my true self. Our mother gave me the name Marcela Sanchez,” Danger stated proudly.

  “My name is Destruction, it is the name of my true self. Our mother gave me the name Gabriela Sanchez,” Destruction said with a small bow.

  “We were born in Cambodia, and despite our Caucasian appearance we consider ourselves to be ethnically Khmer,” Danger said proudly, “Long live Cambodia!”