Lola

by Julia Mills

  Now, I’m sure you’re wondering why I wasn’t freaking out or scared or at the least trying to find a way of escape and thank Satan, that’s an easy one to answer. If Vlad or any other of the vampires Vanessa mentioned wanted me dead, I would’ve already been dead. It’s as simple as that. Vamps are not known for their restraint or patience and I did puke all over him, so I felt pretty good about the fact that I was safe...at least for the time being. Not to mention, they all thought I was Katie, Vlad’s fiancée, and he apparently had opted not to wed one of the teen witchy-poos in favor of coming to find me, so there you have it.

  Stepping out of the shower, I wrapped a big, soft, fluffy towel around my body and put my hair up in another and after brushing my teeth no less than three times, I exited the bathroom ready to see what trouble I could cause. Thankfully, Vanessa, or someone equally attentive, had left a tray of croissants, strawberries, and bananas with a pot of coffee on the table by the window along with a note that read, Clothes in the wardrobe. Dinner is formal and will be served just after sundown in the dining room.

  “So, I guess the whole intolerance to light thing goes for topside vamps, too? Or they’re just fucking with me. Either way, I’m good. Doesn’t have zombie poop to do with me.” I said to myself while slathering butter on my croissant and pouring a beautifully, mouthwatering cup of steaming java.

  Plopping into an overstuffed dark leather chair, I ate two croissants, a banana, and most of the strawberries while enjoying two cups of coffee and looking out the window at one of the biggest backyards I’d ever seen. I counted three fountains and four other stone statues decorating two gorgeous gardens with flowers I was sure had been imported from places I’d never heard of. There was a tennis court, two putting greens behind all the flowers, and farther behind that a huge barn where I counted no less than ten horses being walked about and groomed.

  “Wonder what the hell vamps need with all this shit? It’s not like they can go out and get a tan.”

  “No, but they can enjoy it all by the light of the full moon and besides...that whole sunlight thing is merely a slight annoyance we’ve learned to deal with,” a low, rumbling voice answered from somewhere behind me, making me jump from my chair, drop the cup in my hand, and scream, “What the fuck?” while spinning around and losing my towel to the inevitable force of gravity.

  Dumbstruck from one glance at the most handsome man I’d ever laid eyes on, it took exactly four point six seconds for me to realize I was standing stark ass naked with a towel on top of my head and coffee puddling under my feet. Bending over with the speed of light and covering up my nudity, I stammered, “Who the hell are you? Why are you in my room?”

  Crossing his arms over his chest while maintaining his devil-may-care lean against the doorframe, said intruder reached on top of his head, slid a pair of black horn-rimmed glasses into place, and said, “Ringing any bells yet?”

  Memories of the night before and my abduction from the bowels of Hell came rushing back in flashes and bursts ending with swirling grey eyes and the feeling that I was falling off a cliff. Making sure my towel was secure, I stamped my foot and put my fist on my hip as I huffed, “You whammied me.”

  The corner of his oh-so-very-kissable lips curved into a sexy grin as he chuckled, “I whatted you?”

  Stomping my foot again, I reiterated, “You whammied me.” I put my hand up and flitted my fingers. “You know. You used your vampire mind tricks on me. Made me fall asleep.” I stepped forward. “After throwing me over your shoulder and hauling me out of Hell.” I clicked my tongue. “Against my will, I might add.”

  “Well, you ruined my favorite black pants,” he countered with a twinkle in his gorgeous grey eyes.

  “Puulllllleeeeaaassseee, spare me your heartache.” I rolled my eyes. “You’re a vamp. Isn’t ninety-nine percent of your wardrobe black?”

  Throwing back his head and barking with laughter, Vlad (I knew it was him. Not sure how, but I did.) agreed. “Got me there.” Then he looked me right in the eye, his face suddenly stone cold, and said, “You’re really not Katie, are you?”

  Sighing, because I was really getting tired of the whole Katie drama, I plopped back into the chair I’d prematurely vacated and shook my head. “No, Einstein, I am not Katie. I’m Lola. Katie doesn’t live here anymore.”

  I heard him walking toward me and prayed to the Devil he hadn’t decided to eat me for dinner or breakfast or whatever meal it was for him and then breathed a sigh of relief when he just sat in the chair on the other side of the table and looked me up and down. I tried to be patient, swear to Satan I did, but it’s not a virtue I ever possessed and it damn sure didn’t come with my new bod, so I opened my mouth and said, “Sorry, I guess she tried some high-level hocus pocus thingamagig and well, things didn’t go her way.”

  Looking at literally the sexiest man I’d ever laid eyes on, (Yes, I know I laid eyes on him the night before but let’s face it, I was seeing double and triple and we all know that grog-goggles can make even the narliest of dudes look like Henry Cavill. I had to be sure, didn’t I?) I realized what a lucky girl Katie had been to be engaged to such a looker and with bucks-a-plenty to boot. It made me wonder what magic she’d been futzing with and why she’d take such a risk, but the past is the past and her booboo was my good fortune.

  Leaning forward, I reached across and patted his hand. Ignoring the charge of electricity that shot up my arm and landed squarely in my girlie parts, I shook my head and said, “I really am sorry. I’m sure you’ll find another girl who loves you just as much.”

  I swear I saw fire jump in his eyes a split second before he turned his hand over undermine, threaded his long, strong fingers through mine, leaned forward, and murmured, “Oh, I think I already have.”

  Son of a bitch! I didn’t see that coming, did you?

  Chapter Six

  Pulling my hand from his, even though I really didn’t want to, (Sue me, I liked the sparks skittering up and down my arm warming me up like a shot of bourbon on a cool night.) I jumped to my feet, holding my towel tightly to my chest, and screeched, “Now, hold on one minute, Bub. I know you got a sneak peek of the goodies, but these curves are not for sale. Maybe rent...short term at best. Not just no, but HELL NO! I just got my freedom. I’ve got wild oats to sow, tables to dance on, sailors to screw, and frat parties to crash.”

  Nodding his head and sucking on his bottom lip, which made the butterflies start dancing in my stomach and had me licking my own lips with the desire to taste his, Vlad stood, took a step to the side, and with a bow of his head, commented, “Then I shall see you at dinner.” He held up his hand. “No, you are not on the menu.” He looked over the frames of his glasses in an oh-so-sexy way and winked. “I believe we are having prime rib.” He turned and walked toward the door, speaking over his shoulder, “You can meet the family and look around the rest of the estate. See if there’s anything you like.”

  Stopping with his hand on the knob, Vlad looked over his shoulder and added, “I’m sure we can find something to occupy your time.” He took off his glasses and leveled his gaze right at me. “Who knows, you may find you never want to leave.” Then the dirty rotten scoundrel used his vamp super-speed and was gone before I could give him a witty comeback.

  Not that I really had one. Satan knows the man had scrambled my brains, had my libido in overdrive, and made my girlie parts begging to be his slave for life. Vlad was sex on a stick and I was in need of a lick in the worst kinda way, but I had to resist. I had to hold on tight to all the plans I’d made. I had been stuck inside Heidi for a long, long, loooong time, and I had some catching up to do. I couldn’t let the first hot as hell vamp who crossed my path lock me up in some iron clad deal that had me knocked up and popping out little fangers like they were gumballs. Oh, hell to the no.

  And, I needed to stop telling Vanessa anything. Seems the little weasel told all my secrets and then some. Vlad had come in well-briefed and prepared and that would just not do. I needed to
keep that scrumptious bit of fangly goodness on his toes if I was gonna get the hell outta dodge and back to my people.

  First on my list of to-dos was to get dressed and get downstairs for this all important dinner. I wasn’t really interested in meeting the family, but I was keen on finding a phone and calling my girls. Hopefully, Heidi figured out what had happened and got her phone replaced. The Devil knows the girl can’t be without the gadget to snap pictures of her brood every second of the day. And if luck was on my side, Zelda had gotten hold of my Hellhound bestie to let her know Vlad and company had succeeded in their plot to nab my shapely backside. One ring-a-ding-ding should bring the cavalry running to my rescue.

  Opening the wardrobe, I nearly had a heart attack at all the gorgeous clothes. There was Prada, Dior, Hermes, Ralph Lauren, and even two Chanel originals. Bracing myself on the door, I took several deep breaths as my fingers glossed over the exquisite fabrics. After fifteen minutes of looking at every piece of glorious clothing while trying not to drool, I finally decided on an off the shoulder, black stain vintage Chanel evening gown.

  Laying it on the bed, I let my fingers lovingly touch the sequins and crystals that had been so delicately sewn across the neckline. They perfectly matched the ones decorating the toes of the kitten heel slingbacks I had picked out from the other closet and the clutch that I knew I didn’t need but absolutely had to carry to complete the outfit. What fun was it to have a body and all these amazing clothes if I wasn’t going to wear them? I mean, come on people.

  Sitting at the dressing table, I found every imaginable eye shadow, blush, bronzer, lipstick, and foundation. It seemed Katie had good taste and Vlad was willing to support her habits. Being the recipient of all the fun was yet another happy accident that had been my life since getting my new flesh bag.

  Having Heidi as a teacher, I was pretty good in the makeup department, although, she did accuse me of going too heavy on the lipstick. since I wasn’t out to impress on this particular evening, I went with a more muted, but still red, shade and tried to be tasteful in its application. My hair was another matter altogether. Since getting my own body and being sent back to Hell, I hadn’t had to do anything but wash it and throw it up in a ponytail. Vlad had kidnapped my happy hiney before Heidi had gotten around to Hair Styling 101, so I was kinda lost. But never let it be said that Lola can’t figure her way out of any situation.

  After finding some hair spray and a box of bobby pins, I went to town tucking and spraying my mighty mane until I had what I’d seen in a magazine called a messy updo. The little curly tendrils that framed my face had just fallen into place and the rest looked pretty damned good if I did say so myself. I knew it was silly and it wasn’t that I cared what he thought about how I looked, but for some reason the vision of Vlad’s smile and the appreciative twinkle in his eye kept coming to mind.

  And I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking that I’m falling for him, but you couldn’t be more wrong. I just appreciate a good-looking man, whether he be warm-blooded, cold-blooded, or blood-sucking. Good-looking is good-looking and there is nothing wrong with me wanting to look my best. I mean, let’s get real...when will I ever have the chance to wear vintage Chanel again in my whole entire witchy life? So there. Now hush.

  Yeah, that should do it for my healthy dose of rationalization for the next year or so...

  I had just slipped my freshly painted toes into my shoes when there was a knock at the door. Not sure what to expect but needing one more look in the mirror, I yelled, “Come on in, it’s open.”

  I got about a half-second warning before I was being spun around, wrapped up in a pair of big strong arms, and kissed within an inch of my life. Of their own volition, my fingers wound into his thick dark hair and my body pushed even closer to his. The tip of his tongue teased the seam of my lips, making me gasp and open completely.

  Fire spread through my veins as his tongue slid along mine and, for the first time since opening my new eyes, I felt truly alive. Every cell in my body wanted more. My body warmed and my girlie parts tingled. Until this moment, I had only experienced arousal vicariously through Heidi and let me tell you, it was like dropping a penny in a fountain compared to the tsunami of desire flooding my senses in this hunky vampire’s arms.

  Pulling away as quickly as he’d attacked, Vlad took a step back but held my upper arms as I fought to stay upright. His eyes were hooded, his lips swollen, and if I wasn’t mistaken, there was a blush on his usually pale complexion.

  The silence was getting awkward so true to form, I opened my mouth and tried to be funny. “Well, hello to you, too.”

  Dropping his hands, Vlad looked everywhere but in my eyes and mumbled, “Oh, my God, Kat...I mean Lola, I am so sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I saw you and...and well, I couldn’t stop. You look so beautiful and smell so...” Stopping short, he bowed his head, took a deep breath and another step back before once again looking up. This time, he met my eyes. I could see he’d slipped his mask of control into place and was once again playing Lord of the Manor as he said, “Please, forgive me. My actions were inappropriate and ill-mannered.”

  Not liking this version of Vlad and with my body still aching for more of what had felt so right, I closed the distance between us, swatted his arm, and said, “I get it. It must be hard. I look like your fiancée. Hell, I am in her bod. It’s easy to fall into old habits.”

  When he didn’t answer, I patted his hands where he held them tightly in front of his gorgeous body. “No harm, no foul, Dude, really.”

  Clearing his throat, Vlad looked right into my eyes and, with a tone as serious as the grave, said, “I never kissed Katie. Never touched her except to kiss the back of her hand.” He swallowed hard. “I never had the desire to do anything other than marry her out of a sense of obligation.”

  Turning before I could even process what he’d just said, Vlad strode across the room and said as he crossed the threshold, “I’ll be leaving the manor until you are gone. Please, have dinner with my family. Stay as long as you like. Vanessa will make your travel arrangements when you’re ready to go.” I was still trying to understand what he was saying as, for the third time, the butthead pulled his disappearing act and I was left standing with my mouth open wondering what the hell to do.

  Satan, help me, but I miss Hell. At least I understand the freaks down there.

  Chapter Seven

  Dinner was boring and bloody. I mean, not bloody like a vampire massacre kind of bloody, but bloody in the fact that the prime rib was basically raw. Now, I like a good steak as much as the next girl, (Found that out my first night in Hell. Hunter is a damned good cook. Just give the boy a grill and some meat and dinner is served.) but when it’s still mooing, well, let’s just say it’s not my thing. I did learn that Vanessa is the youngest and only girl in the Valentine family. (Yeah, I thought their last name was kind of ironic too but when I snorted and asked, ‘Really?’, I was met with four glares that made me shut up and eat my salad.)

  Apparently, she hadn’t gone through the change as they kept calling it and at this point, had no desire to give up her human status. The Masters—as they and their sister called themselves—Vincenzo and Vaughn (no Vlad since I scared him away) all went through the change on or around their thirty-fifth birthdays, hence the reason they looked like triplets but were, in fact, not. From what I could put together, Vlad was the oldest and somewhere around three hundred years old but they all acted like his true age was some deep dark secret, and since I was the reason he was absent from our little soiree, I decided to drop the subject. Vincenzo, the middle brother, made no attempt to tell me how old he was but Vaughn, the youngest and by far the one with the best sense of humor, let it fly that he’d just turned two-hundred-and-one.

  I kept waiting for Vanessa to say her age but she never did and, to be honest, I couldn’t believe her hair was still in the same messed up bun or that her teeth were still covered with lipstick while she wore the most gorgeous aqua blue
Dior gown that perfectly matched her eyes. I made a mental note to help her out with style tips even though I had plans to hitch a ride on the first train back to Hell as soon as possible.

  Somewhere between bloody beef and tiramisu, I heard the tragic tale of how their parents had died fighting some deep dark evil. Vaughn also had no problem telling me that, although I looked like Katie, I was a helluva lot more fun and sexy as all get out. (His words, not mine, but you know I wholeheartedly agree.)

  “Now, tell me how you came to live in Katie’s body?” the youngest of the Valentine vamps asked as he poured a glass of what I could tell was blood but chose to tell myself was wine for himself and a snifter of brandy for me.

  Following him out to the terrace as Vincenzo and Vanessa discussed something about the family business, I explained. “Well, what I was told was that Katie was trying to do a spell and something backfired. She, well her soul and all its shiny bits, were blown out of her body straight to the Next Adventure.” I looked up at him and added, “That’s what Zelda, a super powerful witch and the Shifter Wanker, calls Heaven.” When he nodded, I went on, “So, it worked out perfectly when Heidi, the not-quite Hellhound I had been inhabiting for about thirty years decided it was time for a split and called Zelda for help. I needed a body. She had a body. So, it was out of a Hellhound and into a witch. Presto chango, Lola's gotta brand new groove!”

  Laughing out loud, Vaughn patted my hand where I’d placed it on the iron railing and chuckled. “I can see why Vlad is so taken with you. When he went to collect Katie and found out about her demise, I think he was actually relieved.” He took a sip from his goblet. “Not that he would’ve admitted it. Oh no, my brothers are very big into family honor and the old ways. I have no doubt he would’ve married the little shrew and been miserable for all eternity while holding onto the belief that he’d done the right thing because he’d kept to the letter of the deal father made all those decades ago.”