“Well, Lord Dacian is quite taken with you.”
She nodded to him, thoughtful. Contemplative of the suggestion. It was the same as what she’d already considered. Dacian was an attractive man, without doubt. He would certainly look good in the role of her King. “I will accept his arm for the next dance. We will see where it goes from there.”
When the music ended, she wasted no time in finding Dacian. He carried himself well. More slender in figure than Kaemin, but strong. Perfectly capable of protecting her if she found herself in peril. That was an important quality in the man she was looking for. Much like the knights in the fairy tales her mother had told her when she was younger, her husband would be required to have the skill to step in and save her if she was ever in a situation where her personal knowledge with a blade was inadequate.
Dacian regaled her with stories of his time at sea, battling against the pirates of Luquarr. She hung off his every word, anxious to hear more. His bravery sounded almost too good to be true but in his arms, she was willing to believe anything. As long as he kept speaking. She loved the sound of his voice. Smooth. Sexy.
Every song brought with it a new partner, the men taking note of her unusual openness to dancing, coming from every direction to seek her hand. Her plan couldn’t have worked better. Any fear of being left without the company of a young suitor at her side had dissipated, her head now spinning from the conversation and laughter she shared with every gentleman she came across. Time passed in a blur of faces and twirling around the dance floor. Her attention was so distracted, she barely took note of Calie’s arrival, immediately taking Kaemin’s focus away from anyone else. Not that it mattered now. He had granted the introduction to Dacian, and for that Aiva was forever grateful.
Taking pause near the edge of the dance floor, Aiva drew in a breath, feet aching. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d danced so much! Why she didn’t do so more often was baffling to her. It was relaxing, to let go of everything, and simply enjoy being who she was. The Princess. The woman every man wanted to be with and every woman wanted to be.
“Might I request the next dance with you, Your Highness?”
Aiva’s heart sank at the sound of the voice in her ear. Callum. And to think, she’d been doing so well! She refused to acknowledge the request. He wasn’t deserving of a dance with her. “I am sorry. My card is filled.”
“You do not appear to be dancing the song which currently plays.”
“I have danced every song without rest prior to this. A girl needs to stop and breathe from time to time.”
She made no move to turn and look at him. She didn’t need to see his face to sense the disappointment at her rejection. Good. He would experience more where that came from if he didn’t take the hint. Out of the corner of her eye she could see a young man approaching with whom she’d danced previously. He looked hopeful, hand outstretched to her. A savior in her moment of need. With a smile she accepted him, moving to take a step back onto the floor.
“I thought you were in need of breath,” Callum gazed at her, disheartened
“It seems I have caught it,” she stated calmly. Anxious to get away, she took the lead, pulling the man along behind her. Pride swelled in her heart to leave Callum there, staring after them. She could feel his eyes on them while they danced, occasionally allowing her gaze to wander, satisfied to see him watching her every move with an almost wistful expression. Drawing her shoulders back, she did everything she could to make her figure appear more flattering, smiling wider, laughter louder than usual to give the illusion of a greater enjoyment from the company of her partner.
Knowing Callum was now close by, it made her requirement of new dance partners more desperate. She couldn’t give any moment of rest between songs. To pause would provide him another chance to approach her, and she didn’t want to risk it. She’d turned him away once. If he tried to drag her into a deep conversation, it would be harder to walk away without drawing attention.
Another song ending, Aiva could see Dacian in the crowd. She waved to him, beckoning him to her. He came without hesitation. She didn’t expect he would turn down another opportunity to show off on the dance floor. The crowd was already talking in whispers about the number of dances she’d shared with him in a single night. They spoke loud enough for her to overhear. If word reached her parents, it might appease them for a while at her attempts to seek a groom. She couldn’t know with any certainty if she felt that strongly for Lord Dacian, but he impressed her more and more with every second spent in his presence.
“Your stamina is unmatched,” Dacian grinned, guiding her through the steps of a romantic waltz. If only he knew how thankful she was for the slower pace of the song, her lungs screaming for air under the exertion of the fast numbers which preceded it.
“It is hardly a difficult task to keep up when one’s dance partner is as pleasant as you,” she smiled playfully. It seemed important to flatter him. To let him know that she had taken an interest. With any luck, she might be able to acquire his company again, away from the watchful eyes of Callum – and everyone else at the celebration. He was worth taking the time to get to know when she wasn’t occupied with the constant torment of another man.
She gasped in surprise to find Callum suddenly beside them, his hand coming to rest firmly on Dacian’s shoulder. “Lord Dacian. I hate to intrude, but if I may steal your partner for a moment.”
“Of course, Commander.” Dacian stepped back, his face contorting in confusion at Callum’s approach. He stood, staring at Aiva in disbelief before slowly finding his way into the crowd.
Her anger rose in the presence of Callum. Forcing his company on her. Jaw clenched, she remained stiff as his hands took their position around her for the dance. “Did you just pull rank on my partner?” she demanded. Her voice was cold. Hard. It was astonishing, the audacity he had in using his superior status to coerce Dacian into giving up her hand.
“It seemed the only way I would find a chance to speak with you.”
“If you hoped for pleasant conversation, then you chose the wrong method of gaining my attention.”
Aiva felt her pulse quicken. There was something about the way he was looking at her. She didn’t like it. She didn’t like anything about his closeness. In his arms there was no escape. The firmness of his frame. He was stronger now than she recalled. The scent of his cologne was soothing. Sweet. She hated how much she enjoyed everything about his company, except for him. Why couldn’t he have been anyone else in that ballroom?
People were watching them. More whispers passing between the courtiers. Everyone had seen the intrusion Callum made upon her and Dacian. It was enough to raise suspicions. Curiosity. From the head of the room she was even aware of her parents gazing at them with heightened interest.
Firm in her decision not to give him satisfaction, she stared straight ahead, the shining gold of the buttons on Callum’s doublet blurring into round specks which filled her vision. She refused to look at him. He would not have the pleasure of seeing her eyes, nor did she have any desire to see his.
“Have you been well?”
She let his question linger on the air between them. Why did he even ask? “That never seemed important enough for you in the past. I feel compelled not to answer.”
“Your well-being has always been important to me.”
“Then perhaps you should write my brother a note and ask him how I am doing.”
Frustrated, she broke away from his hold, a short curtsy signaling the end of her participation in the dance. She couldn’t keep up the act through her growing rage. He was ruining everything! There was no fun in her game when he’d found a way to win. It was best if she excuse herself from the celebration. There was little there to keep her interest any longer.
The room was uncharacteristically quiet as she made her way to the door. This was one of the times when she wished people cared less about the details of her personal life. It was none of their business.
&n
bsp; Stepping into the foyer, she drew a breath, clutching uncomfortably at the stiffness of her bodice. She needed air. A walk would do her some good. Through the privacy of the inner palace courtyard. It would be off-limits to the guests of the party. One of the few places where she might be able to regain her senses. She needed to think.
“Your Highness,” Dacian’s voice came as a welcome relief to Aiva’s ears.
Yes. He was exactly who she wanted to see. If Callum tried to come after her, he would find them in each other’s private company and have no choice but to leave. If he created too much of a disturbance, she could have him removed from the palace. She didn’t care who his father was. It would be out of line for him to presume he had any special rights within the royal home. “Lord Dacian. I was just about to go for a walk, if you would like to accompany me.”
“I would like that very much,” he smiled, moving over to take her arm in his. “I was worried you might be leaving the party. Did the Commander say something to offend you?”
“The Commander is very good at saying nothing,” she scoffed. “I was more disheartened that I was taken away from your company. It seems we have a chance to rectify that, however. Have you ever seen the palace gardens? They are said to be the most beautiful gardens in all of Tanispa.”
“I fear I will be disappointed then,” Dacian nodded.
Aiva looked at him, confused by his statement. “Disappointed? You do not think they will be beautiful?”
“When a man finds himself with you, how could mere flowers even compare?”
She was taken aback by the compliment, warmth flooding her cheeks. Flustered, she let her feet begin to move forward, leading them into the central areas of the palace toward the gardens. The last thing she wanted was to linger in the foyer. If her friends had seen the display between her and Callum, they might come looking for her. And right now, she had no desire to be found.
The air in the garden was pure bliss to Aiva’s burning lungs. She’d always felt at home in the courtyard. It had a way of calming her, even when everything seemed to be falling apart around her. It was where she’d spent most of her younger days, training with Cadell and Callum. Memories of being a child again floated through her mind. They were pleasant thoughts. She and Edric running through the flowerbeds to hide from Callum while they played their games, plants pulled up under their carelessness, angering the gardener to no end. The three of them were inseparable then. Often times she found herself wishing she could have it back. To wake up one day and find Callum not gone off to the war, waiting for her with his little wooden sword in the courtyard, taunting her in the way only he could, until they would run at each other, pretending to be their parents during the war, killing the Ven’shal soldiers.
Shaking her head she tried to clear the thoughts from her mind. Why was she thinking about him? He left her. No matter how much she prayed for it to be otherwise, reality never changed. Callum chose to leave her behind. So why couldn’t she do the same with him?
Vaguely aware of Dacian at her side, Aiva led him deeper into the courtyard, nearing the gardener’s shed. Things like that little building made it impossible for her to let Callum’s memory go. He was the first boy she’d ever kissed. The only boy she’d ever kissed. In her dreams, it was always him. She couldn’t think of anyone else because he was the only experience she had. He was the only one she had ever wanted.
Maybe that was it. Maybe that was the key to finally letting it all go so she could pretend Callum never existed. That they had never been friends. She needed to get the image of him out of her head. The feeling of his lips off hers. Turning to face Dacian she smiled, crooking her finger at him, playful, leading him closer to the door of the shed.
“What are you doing, Your Highness?” Dacian chuckled, following after her, mesmerized by her every movement. She had him wrapped around her little finger. Whatever she wanted from him, she could take. And right now, she wanted him to kiss her. But it had to be there. Inside the shed. Not only for the privacy, but for the sake of creating a new memory, erasing the image in her mind of the way Callum looked at her that day. To associate the place with Dacian instead of Callum. An image she might look more fondly on. She was an adult now. The thought of kissing Dacian seemed less daunting.
She backed into the shed, laughing nervously along with Dacian as they closed the door behind them. It was darker than she anticipated. Not that she cared. Her fingers were already wrapping around Dacian’s shirt to pull him forward, her back pressed against the wall, feeling the rack of wooden weapons shift under her weight. He gave no protest at her advances. His lips met hers willingly, soft and warm, sending a wave of surprise through Aiva at the sensation. It had worked too well. There was no turning back now, Dacian’s body closing in tightly to hers.
In that instant she was aware of the panic building in the back of her mind. She’d overlooked a very important detail in her plan. When Callum had kissed her, there was a different feel to it all. There was no passion, such as she felt emanating from Dacian now. They had been children. Or at least she had been. Callum was only newly entered into the adult world. His intentions were innocent with her, whereas Dacian would be different. She wasn’t a child anymore. Dacian considered her a woman, and he was definitely a man, having been out on his own in the world for years. Away from Tanispa on some ship sailing the seas with no one but the company of his fellow soldiers. There was more at stake in letting him so close to her.
Through her fear, she found it hard to think clearly. His hands were moving over the bodice of her dress. The emotions she felt were unfamiliar. Reacting to his passionate embrace in a way that she couldn’t have predicted. Her heart was racing. She could feel his lips moving away from hers, sliding over the exposed skin of her neck. Tilting her head to the side she allowed him to continue. Why couldn’t she think? She had to stop this. It couldn’t go on any longer.
Someone was coming. It took her mind a moment to register the sound of footsteps nearing the door, not wanting to believe it at first, horrified at the thought. “Dacian,” she whispered, hoping to catch his attention. Instead, he tightened his hold on her, oblivious to her desperate, quiet plea. “Dacian, there is someone…”
The door opened slowly. It seemed to take forever in Aiva’s mind for the person outside to come into view. Callum. She wondered at first if she was hallucinating. Conjuring his image out of guilt for what she was allowing Dacian to do. The look on his face was enough for her to know that it was no illusion. He stared at her, their eyes meeting in horrified silence, her body going rigid under Dacian’s embrace. Confused by her sudden stiffness, Dacian lifted his head, glancing toward the door to see what had caught Aiva’s eye. Nervously he stepped away from Aiva, stammering excuses for what Callum had seen. It wasn’t what it looked like. He could explain.
Callum said nothing. His eyes remained on Aiva, filled with a combination of emotions that she couldn’t decipher, shifting from shock to revulsion, contorting his face into a look of utter misery. Without a word he turned away, disappearing into the darkness outside.
With the distance restored between her and Dacian, Aiva’s mind began to function again, immediately calling forward all the possibilities that could come from their being discovered. Callum could tell his father. Or worse, he could take the discovery directly to her parents. She couldn’t let that happen. Dacian would be punished and she didn’t want to think of the disapproval that would fall on her for the deeds. She was letting her parents down. How could she have let this happen?
There would be time for guilt later. Right now she had to stop Callum. She needed to talk to him. To secure his silence. “Callum!” she shouted, running out into the garden where he’d disappeared. “Callum, wait!”
Breathless, she came to a stop in the middle of the courtyard, staring helplessly around the shadows. He was gone. Twice now she had walked out of that tiny shed to find him vanished. With any luck, he wouldn’t return this time. Not only for her own anger t
oward him, but the humiliation she felt at what he’d seen. How could she look him in the eye now? Any respect he might have still had for her would be gone. Dissipated by the knowledge of what she’d done. But she couldn’t continue after him. People would be watching. Aware of the troubled look on Callum’s face upon entering the palace. They would ask questions. Her running in on his heels would only add to that. It would be her word against his. If he told anyone, she would see the stories quickly squashed. Right now she needed to get inside the palace. It would be hard to deny accusations if she was found in the gardens. Filled with regret beyond any she’d ever felt before, she hurried toward the doors, leaving Dacian alone in the dark. She could make amends with him later. All she wanted right now was to hide.
Chapter Three
Sleep evaded Aiva throughout the night. Every time she closed her eyes, all she could see was Callum’s tortured expression. Burying her face in her pillow she tried to force the image from her mind. Nothing she did could make it fade, only adding to her guilt. What had she been thinking? That behavior wasn’t like her. She wasn’t the vengeful type, and she was even less of a flirt. To have done that with Dacian! A man she’d only just met.
Stop it, she chided. You act as if you did something worse than a mere kiss. It was easy to argue her innocence, though something about it felt less than angelic. The way Dacian’s hands had moved over her body. She shuddered to think of it. What was worse – she hadn’t disliked it. The sensation had been pleasant. But wrong. Everything was all wrong.
While she had been attempting to rid herself of Callum’s memory, she’d managed to find a way to make one that was even worse. She would never forget his face. It pierced her heart. She’d wanted to make him jealous. Never had she intended to do – whatever she’d done to him to make him look at her like that.
The Myatheira Chronicles: Volume Two: Beyond the Veil Page 6