Shattered Dreams (Dreams Series Book 1)

by Hicks, Braxton

  Gina picked me up at eleven and we headed to the Bristol Mall. It was packed with Black Friday shoppers. I couldn’t pass up a gorgeous pair of silver cuff links for Trey. They were in the shape of sexy, pouty lips. In a music store I bought a CD to replace the Debussy disc that Gina had tossed from his car. Gina rolled her eyes when she saw my selection. I also bought Trey the new One Republic CD to complete his collection. I was glad we at least had a band in common that we liked. Gina bought nearly two hundred dollars worth of CDs just for Ian.

  Our next stop was Belk. I wanted to buy a tie for Trey. This prompted more eye-rolling from Gina. I spent twenty minutes, finally selecting the perfect silk tie for him in a rich sapphire blue.

  “Doesn’t this match the color of his eyes perfectly?” I held the tie up for Gina to inspect.

  “Yes Tylar,” she replied, clearly bored with this department. “Let’s do some shopping for you after this, okay?”

  Gina directed me to a small lingerie shop at the corner of the mall. It was called “The Sextique Shop.” The shop’s décor was all deep red, purple, and black. The lingerie displayed on the mannequins was borderline vulgar. I was a bit surprised that this sort of underwear appealed to her. She breezed through the store, not stopping to look for anything in particular. At the back of the store, there was an alcove off to the left, separated by a curtain of colored beads. Gina held the beads aside for me to enter.

  Holy crow!

  There were shelves full of adult toys and gadgets, lotions and potions. I turned to face her, my eyes wide. “What are we doing in here?” I exclaimed.

  “We’re shopping for you, girlfriend, well actually, we’re shopping for your hormones,” she clarified, laughing.

  “I’m not buying any of this stuff. I’d be too embarrassed, and I wouldn’t know how to use it.”

  “They’re fairly self-explanatory,” she replied, undeterred. “Besides, I’m buying. These are my early Christmas gifts to you. Don’t worry, I’ll be tasteful. If you’re uncomfortable in here, go look at some undies,” she said, waving her hand dismissively.

  I went back out to the lingerie portion of the store allowing Gina to shop in private. I browsed through racks of edible underwear and panties with built-in vibrators.

  Gina came out about twenty minutes later and handed me the gift bag, instructing me not to open until I was home and alone. I noticed that she held another gift bag from the store as well.

  “Who’s that for?” I asked, nodding toward the bag.

  “A present for Ian,” she said nonchalantly.

  “Ian? I didn’t see stuff for guys in there.”

  “Ian and I like playing with toys together,” she said as if I should have known this about them. She'd provided a lot of details on their sex life; perhaps I hadn’t paid close enough attention. I considered the possibilities momentarily. I looked over at her when I heard her giggle. She was watching me figure it all out.

  “You really were a virgin, weren’t you?”

  “Shut up,” I snapped, giggling.

  Breaking for lunch, I filled Gina in on some of the details regarding the situation with Charlie, my mom, and of course, Trey. I shared with her that he'd told me that he loved me yesterday.

  “You mean you didn’t know that until then?”

  “Well, I sort of suspected, or maybe hoped…”

  She smiled, knowingly.

  Gina and I left the mall so that I could make it to the manor by four. Trey had texted me twice while we were out.

  “Jesus Christ, he’s high maintenance,” Gina rolled her eyes.

  “But so worth it,” I cooed, smacking my lips.

  “Eww, you so want to fuck him again, don’t you?”

  “It’s been a few hours.”

  “Well,” she said, “I’m no weatherman, but I predict you’ll be getting several inches tonight.” We were both still laughing as Gina pulled up the circular driveway in front of the manor.

  “There’s your perfect storm now,” she commented, nodding toward the porch. She popped the trunk and I gave her a hug goodbye, telling her to call me next week. Trey helped me with my shopping bags. I made sure the one from the sex boutique was hidden at the bottom of a larger bag. Trey closed the trunk, waving to Gina as she pulled out. I was going to miss her.

  “It looks like you did well at the mall,” Trey noticed.

  “You're to stay out of these bags, though. No snooping!”

  “Please don’t spend your money on me, Tylar,” he frowned.

  “Why?”

  “You have limited resources. I can afford anything I need.”

  “That’s really not the point of Christmas, Trey.”

  We entered the foyer. Trey helped me out of my coat, handing it to a waiting Thatcher. I grabbed my two shopping bags from Trey and rushed upstairs to his suite. He could suck the air out of my happy balloon in a nanosecond. I tossed the shopping bags and my purse on his bed, hurrying into the bathroom to pee.

  He was sprawled out on his bed when I came out of the bathroom, hands clasped behind his head. His legs were crossed, shoes were off, and he was wiggling his toes inside his socks. It was a relaxation thing for him, I thought; I’d seen him do it before. Right now it was simply irritatingly sexy to me. My lustful thoughts were interrupted when my phone rang.

  “It’s the doctor’s office,” I said. Trey sat up immediately.

  Dr. Hamilton was on the line and asked a few questions about how I was feeling, what I'd been doing just before the fainting spell, and if I was eating and sleeping normally. She suspected that a sudden drop in my glucose level might've caused me to faint. At this stage of my pregnancy my hormone levels were fluctuating constantly along with increased testosterone production. She said that she'd reviewed my blood and urine test results and nothing looked out of range.

  “Thanks Dr. Hamilton,” I said, feeling relieved..

  “Everything's fine," I told Trey, getting up from where I'd been sitting on the bed while talking to her. I was feeling grumpy over Trey's comments about Christmas. It would be our first one together. I wanted it to be special for the both of us.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked, furrowing a brow.

  “I want to know why you said that about me spending money on you for Christmas. That really hurt my feelings.”

  “Hey,” he said, walking over to me, “I love that you want to buy me things. You’ve made it very clear, though, that I can’t reciprocate. You hurt me when you traded in your Mercedes without even discussing it with me. Did you ever consider that?”

  I truly hadn’t considered discussing it with Trey. It was my gift, I thought, to do with as I pleased. Was that wrong?

  “I understand the practicality of trading in the Mercedes. But, had you come to me, I'd have helped make sure you wouldn’t take such a loss on the deal. I get it that you want to make practical decisions. I support that. You haven’t given me a chance, though. I can afford to give you the things I give you. But you won’t let me buy you things, so I have to be concerned with your spending your money on me. That’s all I meant.”

  I launched myself into his arms. “I’m sorry. I guess I didn’t look at it from your point of view.” He leaned down and kissed the top of my head.

  “So,” he said, “where were you going just now?”

  “To get dressed for dinner. We’re still going to Morelli’s?”

  “Yes, we are,” he said, his eyes sparkling. “We have some time though. I was thinking that we could shower together?”

  “Sure,” I giggled, “Let’s go.”

  Chapter 41

  Savory Italian flavors enveloped us as we entered Morelli’s. Carmelita greeted us with a shriek, holding her meaty arms out, capturing Trey in a bear hug, and winking at me slyly over his shoulder.

  “Signor Trey,” Carmelita gushed, “sono molto contento di rivederti con questa bella ragazza. Non posso tollerare che brutta strega sei venuto qui con l’ultima volta. Spero che sia finita!”

&nb
sp; Mr. Trey, I am so happy to see you back with this beautiful girl. I cannot tolerate that nasty witch you came in here with last time. I hope that's finished!

  Ah hah! Trey had brought Charlotte back in here. Carmelita wanted me to know. Carmelita glanced over at me as she released Trey from her sturdy embrace. I gave her a slight nod to let her know I appreciated the heads up.

  “La ringrazio, Carmelita,” Trey said, laughter in his eyes. “Avete la mia parola la strega non sarà di nuovo qui con me sempre! Saremo al nostro solito tavolo?”

  Thank you, Carmelita. You have my word the witch will not be back here with me ever. We will be dining at our usual table please?

  “Ma naturalmente, si prego di venire in questo modo.”

  But of course, please come this way.

  My feelings were hurt, but I had to contain my emotions for now. I followed as Carmelita seated us at “our” table.

  She handed each of us a menu, snapping her fingers for a server to fill our water glasses. “Un momento,” Carmelita said, hurrying over to scold a busboy who was noisily clearing a table.

  “What was all that about when we came in?”

  “All what about?”

  I know the truth, Sinclair.

  “All that Italian gibberish going back and forth between you and Carmelita when we first got here. I don’t understand why she doesn’t use English when she talks to you.”

  “She was simply telling me that she was glad to see you and me; that she thinks you’re beautiful. I agreed with her that you're by far the most beautiful woman on earth and that you're mine,” he said sweetly, taking my hand in his and raising it to his lips.

  Not a totally accurate translation, Sinclair. Nice touch with the charm.

  I gazed sweetly at Trey, squeezing his hand. Carmelita arrived back at the table, smiling.

  “Quale vino vi bere, Signor Trey?”

  What wine will you be drinking this evening Mr. Trey?

  “A Tuscano merlot will be fine, Carmelita. Just a glass for me please, Tylar is abstaining,” Trey said, not answering her in Italian this time. He was evidently tired of me asking him to interpret their conversations. She nodded and was off.

  I took a sip of my water, noticing how handsome Trey looked in his suit. It was a dark grey flannel; the front-pleated trousers hung low on his narrow hips. He'd worn a white dress shirt and a scarlet silk tie. I was wearing a curve-hugging Nicole Miller maternity dress that made me feel like a model, with my new black ‘fuck me’ heels, against Trey’s advice.

  They were high black spikes with chrome metal heels, ankle wraps, and a metal toe plate in chrome to match the heels. When Trey saw me putting them on he did a double take.

  “You aren’t seriously wearing those shoes outside are you?”

  “Why wouldn’t I?”

  “Those shoes are not meant to go beyond the bedroom!” He held the shoe I’d yet to put on in his hand, examining the metal heel.

  “What?” I asked, feeling mocked.

  “Baby, these shoes were made to dig into somebody’s back while he’s fucking you; these shoes weren't made for walking.”

  “Give me that,” I hissed, snatching my shoe from him. I blushed at his assessment, but filed it away for future reference.

  Trey silently studied me from across the table. I took another sip of water, trying to figure out what was on his mind. It was quite warm in the restaurant this evening. Carmelita returned with a glass of merlot for Trey. Trey ordered for both of us, knowing that I wasn't picky when it came to Italian cuisine. He raised his wineglass for a toast.

  “To the most beautiful woman I've ever met, being here with me tonight in our special restaurant.”

  Hmm - wonder if he made that same toast to Charlotte.

  “Per la salute, Tylar,” he finished, clinking his wine glass against my raised water goblet.

  I waited until he took a long, leisurely swallow of his wine. “Trey, vorrei sapere si questa è la tavola con la tua puttana Charlotte? A proposito, hai scopata?”

  Trey, I would like to know if this is your table with your whore Charlotte as well. By the way, did you fuck her?

  Trey choked, as I expected, desperately holding his napkin up to his mouth to stifle his involuntary coughing. Carmelita rushed to his aid, patting his back.

  “Non vi piace il vino, Signor Trey?” she asked, her voice filled with concern.

  Is the wine not to your liking, Mr. Trey?

  Trey was still hacking, unable to respond. I took the liberty of answering for him.

  “Il vino va bene, Carmelita. Era qualcosa che non andava bene.”

  The wine is fine, Carmelita. It was something else that did not sit well.

  I saw the flicker of amusement cross her face; Trey was still busy composing himself and did not notice the look that passed between Carmelita and me. She left the table seeing that Trey was regaining his composure. He took several gulps of water, eyeing me suspiciously.

  “So,” I said, “are you going to answer my questions?”

  “Why did you pretend not to understand Italian?”

  “That’s not an answer,” I retorted. “Have you slept with anyone else since we made our baby?” I wasn’t sure why that was so important to me, but it was. I was more sad than mad that he'd brought Charlotte to “our spot.”

  “For God’s sake, Tylar, lower your voice,” he pleaded, looking around at nearby tables where a few snickers could be heard.

  “I’m waiting,” I said, quieter, arms crossed. I tapped one of my stilettos impatiently against the leg of my chair. Trey leaned in close, looking directly into my eyes.

  “No, the answer to your question, to both of your questions is ‘no.’”

  I believed him but my feelings were still raw. The server brought our salads and warm bread on a cutting board. My hunger had dissipated. I needed some answers.

  “I know that you were seeing Charlotte again, Trey. I remember that you made it a point one night of blowing me off because she was at the manor with you.”

  “Tylar, as God is my witness, I've never done more than kiss the witch. I promise you that. If you recall, I thought that you were seeing Mark…that you two were involved. It hurt me. As sophomoric as it sounds, I admit that I used Charlotte to show you that I was getting on with my life.”

  “I see,” I said, keeping my emotions in check. “So Trey, you thought that I was seeing Mark. Did you think that I was sleeping with him, too?”

  “Yes, the thought crossed my mind, more often than I liked as a matter of fact.” He visibly blanched at that question.

  “So you admit you were behaving sophomorically in trying to get on with your life. I can’t believe that hooking up with Charlotte wouldn’t have occurred to you. Maybe it would have given you some closure in some way on our relationship?”

  He lowered his head and I could tell by his body language I'd hit pay dirt. “I’m going to be honest with you Tylar, because you deserve that and it might sound messed up, but it's the truth.”

  Oh God, what's he going to tell me?

  “I know everything about your sexual history; you know none of mine. That’s not fair and I believe that you have a right to know. So here it is. The first girl I was ever with was Tess. I was 17, she was 16. I was faithful to her until she ended it. After that, I didn’t get involved in relationships. I'd no desire to ever put myself in a situation that would devastate me like that again.”

  He took a sip of his wine and continued. “I’ve had casual dates that included casual sex with several women over the past few years since Tess. That’s probably what Charlotte would have been to me had I not met you. Once the woman wanted an exclusive relationship, I bailed. I’m not proud of that, but it's the truth.”

  He paused as our entrées arrived. “After you left me, I called Charlotte. I wanted something to distract me from the emptiness I felt. It was a mistake.”

  I kept silent, waiting for him to continue. I knew there was more.

  “We
dated off and on. I was spending more time in Atlanta since you left. Until then, nothing had happened between Charlotte and me, though I knew that she was willing. She came to spend a weekend with me in Atlanta. We went out drinking. I was struggling to get over you.”

  He stopped, took another drink of his wine, and I saw a smile flicker across his face. What did he find amusing about any of this? I felt that I was on the verge of being crushed.

  “We were in the limo on the way back to my apartment. Charlotte was trying her best to seduce me. Don’t get me wrong, I'd every intention of hooking up that night. I wanted to wash away the emptiness. She unzipped my fly and went down on me.”

  Did I really want to hear this?

  “Nothing happened,” he said, “I couldn’t . . . uh, rise to the occasion. She wasn’t you. I hadn’t even touched her. She disgusted me. I finally told her to stop. I told the driver to take her to the Marriott close to my apartment. I handed her some money and told her to get a room for the night, that I'd ship her luggage back to her.”

  How humiliating for her, I thought. My hormones were giggling and snickering. “What'd she say to you?” I asked, genuinely curious.

  “I believe she called me an impotent faggot and told me to burn in hell,” he smiled, showing his dimple. I couldn’t resist laughing.

  “Well, I mean eventually you'd have been able to perform sexually I’m sure,” I commented.

  “I hope I never have to test your theory,” he responded. “So am I forgiven?”

  “You don’t need to ask for forgiveness. I’m relieved that you couldn’t get it up; I won’t lie about that. I don’t like thinking about you being with anyone else, but given your past with Tess, I see why you can be emotionally distant.”

  He nodded and reached out, capturing a lock of my hair between his fingers.

  “Now,” he said, pulling his hand back, “are we going to eat this food that’s getting cold?”

  “Let’s see if Carmelita could have someone box it up to go.”

  “You’re not feeling well, Tylar?”

  “No, I’m fine Trey. It’s just that I’d prefer to eat this in the privacy of your room, later. I need to make love with you, now."