Season of Passion

by Steel, Danielle

  He nodded, and put his jacket and briefcase on a chair as he looked out the window. It's a beautiful view here. She stood very quietly for a minute, and was surprised at how peaceful she felt. He wasn't the enemy. He was a harmless man who wanted to help her make money. And he looked like a nice guy

  It is pretty. And I'm glad you came all this way to see me.

  So am I.

  She poured him a cup of coffee and they both sat down.

  Kate, can I ask you a crazy question? The way he smiled made her like him more. He looked like one of Tygue's Mends, not like an agent

  Sure, what's the crazy question?

  What the hell are you doing here?

  You said it when you looked out the window. It's pretty. It's peaceful. It's a good place to bring up kids.

  Bullshit.

  She laughed at his bluntness and took a sip of coffee. Not at all.

  Tell me something else? Would you have come to L.A. if I hadn't come here? With a small smile, she shook her head. That's what I thought. Why?

  Because I'm a hermit, and I like it. When I lost my husband, I just' I stopped going places.

  Why?

  I'm busy here. He was coming too close. Suddenly she was scared again.

  What do you do? The eyes were quick, busy, probing, but not unkind.

  I write, I mother. I teach. I'm busy, that's all.

  And scared. Oh Jesus, was she scared. But of what? He couldn't figure it out. Men maybe? People? Life? Something. He couldn't put his finger on it. But it was in her eyes.

  You don't look the part. Did you ever model or act? Bingo.

  No. She shook her head nervously, smiling as she lit another cigarette. Dammit, there was something about her. And he knew she was lying. The way she sat, moved, walked, all of it spoke of something else. Breeding. Training. Modeling? Or maybe she'd been a stewardess. But she hadn't sat in this nowhere town all her life. And he had noticed her shoes. Eighty-dollar shoes. In Shit Town, U.S.A. But whoever she was, she was going to thrill the publishers, if he could pry her out of her shell. That was why he had come up to see her, to find out just how marketable a property she was. And now he had his answer. Very. If she'd cooperate. He smiled gently at her, and sipped his coffee, thinking she'd look great on TV.

  How many kids do you have?

  Nine. She laughed at him nervously again. No, seriously. One. He just acts like nine.

  What's his name?

  Tygue.

  How does he feel about his mom being a huge success?

  I don't think he's figured all that out yet. As a matter of fact, she sighed and let her shoulders relax for a minute, neither have I.

  You don't need to worry about it for a while, Kate. In fact, you don't need to worry about it at all. We'll handle it for you. All you need to do now is look over the contracts, and then spend the next month enjoying yourself. You know, buy new curtains, a new ball for the kid, a bone for the dog' He glanced around innocently and she laughed. He had gotten the message: she liked the simple life. But she also knew that he was refusing to take that seriously.

  What happens when the book comes out?

  Nothing for a couple of weeks. He was stalling her.

  And then?

  Then you make a few appearances for the book, do a couple of interviews. No more than you can handle.

  And if I don't?

  The book suffers. It's as simple as that. It's statistically proven. He looked serious as he said it.

  Is it in my contract that I have to?

  Regretfully he shook his head. No. Nobody can force you to do any of it. But it would be a big mistake for you not to, Kate. If you had buck teeth, a big nose, and crossed eyes, well, then I'd say that maybe you ought to consider skipping any appearances, but under the circumstances he looked at her with a rueful smile you could do a hell of a good job, Kate. And he didn't give a damn what she said, when he watched her walk across the room again, he knew she'd been a model. What intrigued him most, though, was the impenetrable shield around her. He had never sensed that on the phone. Now he wondered why he had never been curious about meeting her. He had to confess, though, that he had never expected her to be a biggie, not until the last book. A Final Season. He hadn't thought she'd been capable of a book like that. We can talk about the publicity stuff later. Why don't we check out some of the points they'll want in the contract first?

  Okay. More coffee?

  Thanks. He devoured five cups of coffee in the two hours it took to sort out the contracts. And now she knew more than ever why she liked him as her agent. He was suddenly the same man he had been on the phone for all these years. He explained every possible inference, statement, danger, benefit, every line, every word, every nuance. He did one hell of a good job.

  Jesus, you should have been a lawyer.

  I was. For a year. The kid? Howdy Doody with the freckles a lawyer? When? She grinned at the thought. I hated it. This is a lot more my speed.

  Mine too. She thought of the three hundred and fifty thousand dollars again.

  You've got that look, Kate. Just don't let it go to your head.

  Not a chance, Stu. Not a chance. She said it with a rocklike certainty and a faintly bitter smile. This is strictly for new curtains and a bone for the dog.

  Glad to hear it. But just in case you pull up outside my office in a new Rolls, say in three months what do I get for being right?

  A kick in the pants?

  We'll see. He grinned broadly.

  She heard the car pool roll up outside then. It was already five-fifteen. They had worked hard. Would you like to stay for dinner? Dinner. Meat loaf, macaroni and cheese, carrots and Jello. The idea made her want to laugh, but he was shaking his head and looking at the flat-faced Roman-numeraled watch that looked like a Dali painting draped over his wrist.

  I'd love to, Kate. But I have a dinner date at eight in L.A.

  Beverly Hills, I hope.

  Is there anywhere else? They laughed together, and Kate walked to the door to greet Tygue. Stu Weinberg watched the boy come in, throw a quick hug around his mother, and then come to a sudden halt when he saw him.

  Hi, Tygue. My name's Stu. He reached out a hand but the boy didn't move.

  Who's he? Tygue looked almost stricken.

  This is my agent from Los Angeles, sweetheart. Don't you have a better hello than that? Tygue looked as frightened as his mother, and Stu instantly felt for the boy. He looked as though he were as unaccustomed to strangers as Kate.

  Tygue grudgingly approached and held out a hand. Lo. His mother glowered, and Stu slowly put the contracts back in the briefcase.

  Well, Kate, nothing left for you to do but relax.' She had signed everything.

  What about the other matter?

  What? But he knew. Let her say it. Let her try it out

  The publicity.

  Don't worry about it.

  Stu ' I can't do it

  Can't or won't? His eyes were very hard on hers.

  Won't

  Okay. He sounded very calm. Too calm. And all the while, Tygue watched silently.

  You mean it?

  Sure. I told you. No one can make you do it You're foolish if you don't. But it's your book, your decision, your royalty check, your career. It's your trip, baby. I just work for you. He made her feel small somehow, stupid and cowardly. If he had known, he'd have been pleased.

  I'm sorry.

  Then think about it. And I'll keep the publicity directors of both the publishing houses off your back until you decide. Okay?

  'Okay. He let her feel that she had won something, but she wasn't sure what. They shook hands at the door, and she watched as he backed a long plum-colored Jaguar out of her driveway.

  She waved from the doorway, and Tygue watched her as Stu smiled at them both from the car. All three of them suddenly knew that everything was about to change.

  Chapter 9

  You survived it? Felicia called after Tygue had gone to bed.

  Yes
. I survived it Actually, he's a very nice guy. I suspect that underneath the veneer, he's a pushy sonofabitch, but I like him.

  Damn right he's pushy. How do you think he got you that fortune you just made?

  Kate laughed at the thought. Good point. If I'd looked at it that way, I'd really have gotten nervous. You know what's amazing though, Licia?

  Yeah. You.

  No. Seriously. After all these years. I wasn't that scared talking to him. We sat here like regular people, drinking coffee, looking at the contracts. It was really very civilized.

  You're in love? Felicia sounded amused.

  Christ, no. He looks like Alice in Wonderland's kid brother, with carrot-red hair yet But he's a good agent. And I didn't have a heart attack from talking to a man. Felicia was pleased for her.

  Okay. So now what?

  What do you mean, now what?

  I mean what happens next?

  Nothing. I put the money in the bank, I send Tygue to college. Stu suggested we buy Bert a new bone she grinned and I might just buy those pink suede sneakers we discussed this morning.

  You're leaving something out, dear one. Felicia sounded sarcastic and determined again. Kate knew that voice only too well. What about publicity for the book?

  He says I don't have to.

  I don't believe you.

  That's what he said.

  Didn't he ask you to? Felicia was floored.

  Yes.

  So?

  I said I wouldn't do it

  You know, you're an ingrate and a bitch, Kate Harper, and if I were your agent, I'd kick your ass from one side of the room to the other.

  That's why you're not my agent, and he is.

  He let you off the hook that easy?

  Yup. Kate sounded like her son as she grinned.

  Then he's crazy. Either that, or very very smart She suddenly wondered.

  Maybe so. Anyway, I signed the contracts and I'm all through. Finished. Until the next book.

  What a drag. Felicia was smiling to herself.

  What do you mean what a drag?

  I mean just that You crank them out, stay up late, smoke a lot, drink a lot of coffee, and you don't even get to do any of the fun stuff. You don't even get to spend the money.

  Why the hell not?

  On what? Groceries? What a drag. The least you could do for yourself is go on a spree somewhere civilized. L. A., here, Santa Barbara. Hell, you could even go shopping in Carmel.

  I don't need anything new to wear.

  Obviously. You don't go anywhere. And why did that make her a failure? Why did she have to go, dress, do, be in order to not be a drag ? Why wasn't just writing the book enough, dammit? Besides, maybe she would do some shopping in Carmel the next time she saw Tom. And that was another thing. She had to go tomorrow.

  Listen, Licia, I'm not going to get into a hassle with you about this. Anyway, I've got to get off the phone.

  Anything wrong?

  No. I have to call Tillie.

  Okay, love. Felicia sounded cool and distant when they hung up, and she wondered if she'd gotten through at all. But maybe '

  At her end, Kate made plans with Tillie for the next day, and then took a hot bath and went to bed. It had been a nerve-racking day, and she had none of the feelings she wanted to have. She wanted to feel proud of herself, and instead she just felt annoyed, as though she had failed at something. At last she fell asleep. Until the alarm woke her at six.

  You teaching again, Mom? Tygue looked at her over breakfast, only this morning he whined the question, and it annoyed her.

  Yes, love. Tillie'll be here for you.

  I don't want Tillie.

  You can work on the garden. You'll have a good time. Eat your cereal.

  It's not crunchy enough.

  Come on, Tygue.

  Yerghk! There's a bug on my toast! He pushed it away and Bert grabbed it off the edge of the table with a contented smacking of his lips.

  Goddammit, Tygue! And then suddenly there were tears in his eyes, and she felt awful. It was a hell of a way to start the morning. She sat down again and held out her arms. He came to them slowly, but he came. What's up, love? Something bothering you?

  I hate him.

  Who?

  Him.

  Now what? Who, for heaven's sake? She was too tired to play games.

  The man ' the one in that chair.

  You mean yesterday?

  He nodded.

  But he's my agent, sweetheart He sells my books.

  I don't like him.

  That's silly. Tygue shrugged and the car pool honked. Never mind about him. Okay? He shrugged again, and she grabbed at him and held him fast I love you and only you. You got that, mister? A small smile crept back to his face. So relax and have a good day.

  Okay. He grabbed his jacket, patted Bert, and headed for the door. Bye, Mom.

  Bye, love. But when he left, she realized that she was angry at him. What was his problem? Jealous of Stu Weinberg? But it was hardly surprising. He had never seen a man in their house before. And it was time he got used to at least an occasional stranger. But still his recalcitrance made her feel pushed. He was pulling her one way, they were pulling the other. Everyone wanted something from her. And what did she want? She wasn't sure. And she didn't even have time to ask herself. She had to get going if she wanted to see Tom ' wanted to see Tom ' wanted ' what an amazing idea. It suddenly made her stop dead in the middle of the kitchen. Did she want to see Tom? She hadn't thought of it that way in years, She went to see Tom. But did she want to see him? Probably. Of course. She picked up her bag, patted Bert, and left, without answering the phone.

  Chapter 10

  Kate stood up and stretched. She had only been with him for two hours and she was already tired. Tom was in a tiresome mood. Even Mr. Erhard looked worn out

  Come on, love. Why don't we take a walk to the boat pond? There was silver threaded into his hair now, but he still had the clear, happy face of a child. Happy most of the time anyway. But sometimes he had the fretful nervousness of a child in distress.

  I don't want to go to the boat pond. I want Willie.

  Then let's go get Willie.

  I don't want Willie.

  Kate tightened her jaw and closed her eyes for a minute. Then she opened them again with a bright smile. Want to lie in your hammock? He shook his head in answer, and looked as though he was going to cry. In fact he looked just the way Tygue had that morning. But Tygue had been jealous of her agent. What was Tom's problem? And dammit, he was so easy sometimes, so lovable. Why did he have to be like this today? She had enough on her mind.

  I'm sorry, Katie. He looked up at her and held out his arms. It was as though he suddenly understood, and she felt guilty as she took him in her arms, leaning down to reach him in his chair.

  It's all right, sweetheart. I guess you just need some new games. It had been months since she'd brought him any. And then she had brought him the ones Tygue had just outgrown. Cast-off games and puzzles from his son. But she didn't see it that way. It was just cheaper buying one set than two. She held him close as she leaned over him and she felt him tighten his grip on her. For the strangest moment, she had an urge to kiss him. Like a man, not like a little boy.

  All I need is you, Katie. You don't have to bring games.

  Just hearing him say that gave her the oddest feeling. She pulled away suddenly and looked into his eyes. But there was no one there. No one but Tom, the child. Not the man.

  I love you too. She sat down on the grass next to him, holding his hand, and the irritation of the first half of the day started to fade. For a moment she wanted to tell him what was happening. The book, the movie, what it all meant '

  Want to play Bingo? He looked down at her sunnily, and she smiled a small tired smile, with her head tilted to one side. She had worn an old lavender wool skirt and soft matching cashmere sweater. He had bought them for her shortly after they were married. He had loved them. Once. Now he didn't notice o
r remember. He wanted to play Bingo. Want to?

  You know what, love? I'm kind of tired. In fact ' She took a deep breath and stood up. She had played enough games for one day. With Tygue, with Tom, with herself. In fact, I think it's time for me to go home.

  No, it's not! He looked heartbroken. Oh Jesus. No! She didn't want him pulling at her too. It's not time to go!

  Yes it is, my love. But I'll be back in a couple of days.

  No, you won't.

  'Tes, I will. She smoothed the soft lilac skirt and looked up at him as Mr. Erhard approached. He had Willie and some books under one arm. Oh, look what Mr. Erhard has for you. But Tom looked like a sad, angry little boy. Be a good boy, darling. I'll be back soon. He held her close for a minute, and for the first time in a long time it tore at her soul again. She needed him now. And he wasn't there. I love you. She said it softly and then backed away with a wave and a too bright smile in her eyes. But Tom was already holding Willie and reaching out for his books.

  Kate walked back to the car with her head bowed and her arms tightly crossed, as though giving herself the hug she suddenly felt she needed so badly. And then as she slid into the car, she sighed and looked up at the trees It was crazy. She had so much. She had Tygue, in a way she still had Tom, and she had just sold a book and a movie. She had just made three hundred and fifty thousand dollars, and she felt like a kid with a busted balloon.

  This is crazy! She said it out loud and then laughed and lit a cigarette as she started the car. And then she had a better idea. She sat back for a minute with a mischievous smile, forgetting where she was and why she was there. Or rather, remembering where she was in a way she hadn't in years. Carmel. for six and a half years she had come to see Tom, and she had never driven the last twelve miles into town. Never gone to see the shops. Never had lunch there. Never walked along the main street Never sat on the beach for an hour to unwind. Six and a half years and she had traveled the same well-worn path back and forth. And suddenly, she had a wild urge to drive into town. Just to see it To wander along a little bit ' the shops ' the people ' she looked at her watch. She was early. She had cut the visit short by almost two hours today. Two hours. With a grin she released the brake and turned left when she reached the road. Left. The road to town.