MANTRUM

by Jacob Chance

  “Roxanne, ease up. She’s not even officially dating this guy yet.” Violet has my back.

  “I have enough to do already without trying to set your picky ass up on a date.”

  Roxanne places her hand on her chest. “I’m not picky.”

  “What about the guy you stopped dating because he chewed too loud?” Violet asks.

  “Come on. You can’t blame me for that. Who wants to listen to someone else chew their food?”

  “What about the guy who wore white sneakers?” I question.

  “Hey, it’s not my fault that only Jax on Sons of Anarchy can rock that look.”

  I drop my head into my palms before looking pointedly at her. “You always find a reason to dislike every guy you go out with.”

  “I take it as a sign that I haven’t met Mr. Right yet. But that doesn’t mean he’s not out there somewhere hiding in a field of Mr. Wrongs. I just have to find him. It’s like the needle in a haystack analogy.”

  “Is that right?” My voice is dripping with sarcasm. “Sorry if I’m skeptical, but even if I wasn’t, I wouldn’t want to introduce you to Rex’s brothers. I’m trying not to spend more time with him as it is.”

  “Don’t be selfish, Dani.” She tries to be serious, but a grin breaks out across her face. “I’m just kidding about the selfish part, but not about wanting to meet them. And you should totally facilitate that for me”

  “Yeah, yeah. I’ll see what I can do.” At this point, I’m just answering to end this part of the discussion. I’m not about to merge my world with Rex’s. What if Roxanne and one of his brothers actually hit it off? Then I’d have to see Rex at functions for years to come.

  “Tell me more about the party.” Violet tries to steer the conversation in another direction.

  “I met his daughter’s mother.”

  “Ooh, what’s she like?” Roxanne jumps right in.

  “She’s nice.”

  “Nice. Ugh. I hate when you say that. Is she pretty?” Roxanne’s frustration with my lack of details shows.

  “Yeah, she’s gorgeous like a supermodel, and if I didn’t like her, I’d hate her. Okay, maybe I do just a little.”

  “What does she look like?” Violet circles a finger in front of her own face.

  “She has dark hair and brown eyes. We look nothing alike. And Ruby looks just like Rex. If the mother didn’t give birth to her, you’d think Rex spit her out alone.”

  “Back to Rex. Did anything happen between you two?” Roxanne always asks the personal questions.

  “His entire family was really nice. I was more comfortable with them than my own family.”

  “Stop dodging and answer me, dammit. Did he put any moves on you?”

  “No.”

  “Come on. I know you’re lying. Don’t forget your tell.” Roxanne points to my mouth and I slap my hand over the bottom of my face. She belly laughs. “I knew it. Tell me. Tell me.” She bounces up and down in her seat, giggling like we’re fifteen again.

  Lowering my hand, I sigh with resignation. I might as well get this over as quickly and painlessly as possible. “He kissed me.” Violet claps in her seat next to me.

  “And?”

  “And that’s it.”

  “There’s more to it than that. How long did the kiss/kisses last?” Roxanne makes a ‘keep it coming’ gesture with her hands.

  “We kissed for a minute or so. It was no big deal.”

  “That sounds like a big deal to me. What was it like?” Roxanne leans her arms on the table, her attention fully on me. “We’re living vicariously through you here. Work with me.”

  “Oh hell, I need to tell someone. They were the hottest kisses of my life.” I fan my blooming cheeks.

  “I knew it. You lucky girl. Why didn’t you stay over?”

  “Because I’m not sure I want to let it get to that place. I didn’t even want to kiss him, but now that we did, I can’t stop thinking about it. Ugh. What am I going to do?”

  Roxanne shrugs. “Kiss him some more and see if it was really as good as you think. Maybe it only seemed so great because you’ve been in a dry spell since your divorce.”

  “I’m going to ignore your cruel reminder of my dry spell and just say that I shouldn’t have allowed the first kiss to happen. Never mind the second or third.”

  “It’s too late to take them back, so you might as well conduct some research and see if his mouth is really that talented.”

  “If you enjoyed it, why wouldn’t you want to do it again?” Violet asks.

  “I don’t know.” I curl my upper lip. “I think I’m going to stick with my initial plan and keep things friends only.”

  “You can try.” Roxanne smirks. “But I have a feeling Rex isn’t going to let that happen now that he’s already kissed you.”

  “I hope you’re wrong.”

  Her eyes gleam wickedly as she wraps a strand of her dark hair around her finger. “When am I ever wrong?”

  “Danika,” Rex calls my name as I walk across the parking lot toward the building our class is held in. He jogs over to me. “Hey, how do you feel about skipping with me and grabbing a bite to eat instead? I know a Chinese place not far from here.” He smiles boyishly, and my first instinct is to say yes. But I can’t.

  “Rex, we both need to attend this class.”

  “Missing one week isn’t a big deal.” He tries to persuade me.

  “Maybe not for you, but it is for me. I’m here because of a direct order from my sergeant. I’m not going to risk my job for a great meal and some okay company.”

  “Ouch.” He grabs his chest. “My company is fantastic and you know it.” I can’t hold in a quick giggle. “Fine. You’re right. We’ll go to class. You can be my voice of reason. I obviously need one.”

  “You do, but that might be a full-time job and I’ve already got one.”

  “Hey, I’m not that bad. It’s more like a part-time job.”

  “Come on. Let’s get in there before we’re late.” I walk toward the entrance with Rex beside me. We remain silent until we’re seated side by side on the metal chairs. I shift my weight, trying to get comfortable. Rex leans closer. “We’d be sitting in a comfortable booth right now about to chow down on some delicious food if you hadn’t insisted we come here.”

  “How are you all this evening?” Teri begins, keeping me from replying. “This is week four of this class and I want to try something different tonight. You and your partner are going to leave here and go do something together. It can be anything you choose. You can go for a coffee, a meal, shopping, or something else. I don’t want you to go to a movie because I’d like whatever activity you do to inspire conversation and bonding. When this course is over, you’ll be able to rely on your partner for additional support. And you’ll feel comfortable enough to do so. Is there anyone who’s not familiar with this area and would like suggestions for places to go?” A couple of people raise their hands and Teri hands a paper to them.

  “Well, how do you like that?” Rex’s deep voice teases my ear. “I had a good idea after all,” he boasts, grinning.

  “Now that Teri suggested it, I’m fine with going. I’m just not willing to do anything to jeopardize my job.”

  He touches my arm. “I know how important your career is, and I wouldn’t expect you to act any differently than you did. My asking was a shot in the dark and I knew that. Your black and white decision-making is one of the things I admire most about you. I wish my moral compass wasn’t so shifty.”

  “A shifty moral compass. That’s a new one.”

  “Hey, what can I say? I’m original at least. And I’m working on being less shifty.” He winks. “So, how about Chinese? Are you game?”

  “Yeah, I could eat.”

  14

  Rex

  Five minutes later we’re in my truck and on our way to the restaurant I mentioned earlier. Danika’s hand caresses the black leather seat. “This is nice. It’s more comfortable than I imagined.”

&n
bsp; “The extended cabs give you a lot more room, and I spend a decent amount of time in this thing for work. I’m always running around for supplies, checking on our work crews, or doing new job estimates.”

  “How come you guys don’t work for your dad?”

  “He’s retired now, but he was a union carpenter. He and my mom started their family young and didn’t want to take a chance on a business failing. By going union, he had a steady paycheck and great benefits. Adam and I didn’t want to work for anyone else, so we teamed up and started our own company.”

  “You love it, though, huh? I can tell.”

  “I do. It’s challenging and it keeps us physically active. Sitting behind a desk every day is not for me. I’d lose my mind. And weather permitting, we get to work outside a lot.”

  “Yeah, I love that about my job too. But in the winter it’s not so much fun.”

  “I bet. At least we can schedule our projects around the seasons, but you’re out there rain or snow too.”

  “Yep. It’s not as bad as you’d think. I just bundle up in layers and drink extra coffee.”

  “Spoken like a true New Englander. We’re hardy folk.”

  “We have to be.”

  “Here we are.” I park in the closest spot I can find. “Let me get your door.” Hurrying around the back of my truck, I assist her down with a helping hand and I don’t relinquish my hold on her. Surprisingly, she doesn’t try to pull away from me. Holding her hand feels right. Just like having her beside me does.

  When we reach the door, I release her hand and usher her inside. A plethora of delicious smells assault us and my stomach rumbles. I worked late today and didn’t have time to eat before leaving for the anger management class.

  We’re seated right away and order quickly. I like how Danika knows what she wants.

  “Tell me something about yourself that I don’t know.”

  She scrunches her nose up adorably. “Like what?”

  “How old were you when you had your first boyfriend?”

  “It depends on what you mean by boyfriend. If you mean someone I went to the movies and made out with, then I was sixteen. But if you’re talking about a committed adult relationship, then it was in college.”

  “Was it with your ex-husband?”

  “Yep. We met my junior year of college and were together for ten years.”

  “That’s a good chunk of time.”

  “All of those years were happy ones too. I know that’s not the norm when people divorce, but that’s how it was for Pete and me.”

  “Was he your first?”

  “Do you mean sex when you say that?” she questions, and I nod. “Yeah, my first and only.” Her cheeks pinken.

  “That’s nothing to be embarrassed about. It’s admirable.”

  “I’m sure it’s not what you’re used to hearing.”

  “This isn’t exactly normal dinner conversation for me. I have a teenage daughter at home. I don’t know that you have an accurate grasp on what my life has been like.”

  “I’m sure you find time to date.”

  “I’m assuming by saying date you really mean fuck?” At her nod, I continue, “I’m not saying I haven’t had sex since she was born, but I’ve had a lot less than you’re probably imagining.”

  “Who said I’m imagining anything?” she says in a sassy tone.

  I angle my torso forward over the table, resting on my forearms. “Aren’t you, though?” I rake my teeth over my bottom lip as I study her fidgeting uncomfortably in her seat.

  “I wouldn’t say I’ve given it too much thought. I mean… we’re just friends, right? And I don’t usually think about my friends in a sexual way.”

  “You don’t usually, but you do me?” She surprises me by nodding. “But this isn’t a situation I’d consider to be usual. Would you?”

  “We did meet in an unorthodox way,” she states.

  “All that aside, there’s too much chemistry bouncing between us to ever be just friends. I know I’m mentioning the obvious, and you’re not ready to admit that to yourself or me.”

  “I never denied being attracted to you. But that doesn’t mean I think it’s a good idea to act on our attraction.”

  “Why does it have to be a bad idea? And why are you keeping us from something we both want? We’re single adults who can do whatever we desire.” I lean farther forward, and tip my lips into a crooked grin. “Why can’t we do each other?”

  A strangled gasp slips between her lips before our waitress appears with our meals. I catch Danika’s troubled gaze and give her a comforting smile. We can table this conversation for now and enjoy the food.

  She’s quiet once we’re back inside my truck. And every mile closer we travel to her vehicle, the more my heart races. I want to say all the right things to make her take a chance on me, but I’ve never been that guy. I’ve never been the guy who had all the perfect words. Or cared enough to try to find them. But I want to for her, only I’m at a loss because my brain has pretty much seized up. Navigating us through the city, I grip the steering wheel tightly with frustration. Why can’t I think of anything to say?

  “You’re quiet,” Danika offers, breaking the silence. I feel her eyes on the side of my face. “Are you angry at me?”

  I turn my head and smile. “Not at all. Please don’t think that, because it’s not even close to what I’m feeling.”

  “What are you feeling, then?” she asks, putting me on the spot as I pull into the almost deserted parking lot and stop next to her car. I shift into park and turn the engine off before meeting her troubled gaze.

  “I’m feeling a lot of emotions I’m not used to dealing with. It’s been a long time since I really cared about someone like I do you. And I think it would be a shame to not see if there’s potential for something really great between us.”

  “What exactly do you want from me? Because at times it seems like you just want to sleep with me, but there are times, like now, where it seems like you want more.”

  “What do you want?” I’d like to see where she stands before I lay all my cards on the table.

  “Oh no. You started this and you can finish it by being one hundred percent honest with me. Tell me what you’re hoping for.”

  I take hold of her hand and decide to lay it all out for her. “I really like you. You’re kind and generous. And it doesn’t hurt that you’re beautiful. How do you feel about going out with me and seeing what happens?”

  She studies my face carefully. “I’ll agree to a trial dating period, but you better be on your best behavior. And if it doesn’t work out, I’d still like to remain friends.”

  “Aww, does that mean you like me too much to completely let me go?”

  “Nah, it just means I’m short on friends.” She smiles toothily, letting me know she’s joking. She totally likes me. And I feel the same about her.

  “Do you have plans tomorrow night?” I’m not waiting to take her out.

  “No. What do you have in mind?”

  “I was thinking I could cook you dinner.”

  “I think we should stick to going someplace,” she counters.

  “Oh, I get it. You don’t trust yourself alone with me at my house.”

  “Yep, that’s it.” She rolls her eyes.

  “Okay.” I rub my hands together. “I’ll pick you up at seven. I know just the place to take you. Dress casually.” She nods and reaches for the handle on the door. “Danika.” I place my hand on her shoulder. She shifts on the seat to face me once more. “You don’t really think I’m going to let you get away from me without tasting your lips again, do you?” Her eyes grow impossibly large in her petite face. Is she really that surprised that I want to kiss her? Doesn’t she want to kiss me just as much?

  Moving closer, I cup the side of her neck. Her pulse rapidly races under the fair column of skin, matching the speed of my own. Leaning forward, I capture her sweet lips with a relieved groan. All night, I’ve wanted to kiss her. There’s barely
been a moment since the party that I haven’t been imagining kissing her again and doing a lot more. I don’t think I’ve jerked off this much since I was a teenager.

  Her soft lips part under mine and our tongues seamlessly find their way together. Desire licks through every inch of me until I’m tempted to throw her down on the bench seat and let nature take its course. But I know that would be a mistake. No matter how much we both want each other, I need to show her she’s worth taking things slow for. Because she is worth it and so much more.

  She swings her leg over my lap, straddling me, and all thought of taking things slow flies out the window. Her soft pussy notches over my hard cock, grinding down with every roll of her bewitching hips. My fingers clamp down on those curves, guiding her while her hands sensually thread through my beard. Everything about this is perfect, except for the location. I don’t want to do this with her in my truck. She deserves better.

  Cupping her cheeks, I draw back, staring into her passion hazed eyes. “We need to stop before we can’t. I don’t want our first time to be in my truck.”

  She shakes her head and then shakes it again, as if she’s clearing her thoughts. “You’re right.” She climbs off of my lap and sits on the bench next to me.

  “Damn. That was something else.” I take hold of her hand. “I thought our first kisses were hot, but that right there put them all to shame.” Danika stares down at our hands. “Are you okay?”

  She glances up at me. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  “Are you upset about something?”

  “Only my lack of control.”

  “I wasn’t exactly innocent either,” I excuse.

  “Whatever you pick for our date, make sure we’re in public, please.”

  I chuckle. “I think I have just the place that’s guaranteed to stifle all romantic urges.”

  15

  Rex

  We step inside the barn, Danika’s eyes scanning every square inch. “So, this is our date night, huh?” She smiles and nods her approval.