by Em Pitts
"Thanks, guys," I muttered out and squeezed Isaake closer. I didn't care if they were wearing rose-colored glasses or making everything up. It was nice to be appreciated for the moment.
27
I woke up surprisingly well rested. Raynor was behind me and I was laying on his arm. When did that happen?
The guys were taking turns leaving the cave to make an appearance and pretending to worship yesterday. All day. Apparently, a lot of worshipping goes into this. The others believed the more you showed your gratefulness and commitment the more likely you didn't die. Luckily, the guys were with me most of the time. Nick even brought cards.
I remember laying down after gobbling down hardtack and lots of water. I couldn't get comfortable and was tossing and turning before someone put a pillow under my head. A pillow that oddly smelled like Raynor. I must have been out of it if I didn't notice I was laying on Raynor's arm and not a pillow.
"Morning." Nick's voice pulled my attention towards the entrance of the cave. "You look cozy." He cocked an eyebrow at me pointedly looking towards Raynor's arm and back again.
"Hmm. Much better than the dirt. I didn't know they made pillows in the shape of arms in your time. I would have requested one immediately when I got here." I teased.
Raynor shifted as I lift myself up. He rolled over when he had free reign of his arm again and stayed asleep. I snorted and walked up to Nick.
"They make arm shaped pillows in your time?" He looked curious at the idea.
"Sort of. They make pregnancy pillows that wrap around a woman like she is in a cocoon all night. Those look awesome." I yawned and stretched waking up. Nick's eyes unfocused as he got lost in thought. I caught a small smile on his face. "What are you thinking about?" His face went red.
"Nothing." He quickly replied. I let it drop. It's too early for badgering.
"Where's Isaake and Ollie?"
"Going to find a pan." He rolled his eyes. "We soaked the hardtack last night so we could make you waffles this morning but none of us thought about not having something to cook them on. I told them no one else brought anything like that either. Most of the men don't even learn to cook, instead relying on the women to do it."
"Why were you trying to make me waffles?"
"Because you don't care for the hardtack. Thought we could make them taste a little better." Nick admitted running his fingers through his hair and shifting his weight. My chest warmed at the gesture.
"I can eat it, Nick. Thank you though. It'll be fine." I reassured him.
He looked too cute fidgeting there and I wanted to hug him. I made a vow to not pursue anything romantic with any of them, but surely hugging was fine right? I stepped up and wrapped my arms around his waist. He immediately pulled me close and held me. I'll figure out the friendship rules later.
"Nothing." Ollie came in muttering. He stopped at the sight of me before continuing inside. "Morning."
"Good morning." I stepped away from Nick.
"Sorry guys, no waffles." Isaake entered next. "I can go see about finding some berries or something?" He offered.
"Hardtack is fine. Honestly. There's no need to get anything else." I tried to reassure them.
"We wasted a lot of it." Ollie admitted as he gestured towards a bowl filled with hardtack and water.
"Where did the bowl come from?" It was the same color of the ground beneath it.
"I made it." Ollie confirmed my thoughts.
"Could you make a pan too?" Ollie was shaking his head before I finished my sentence.
"It wouldn't stay together when I add heat to it." I cocked my head at his explanation.
"What about rock?" He didn't understand me. "If you used rock and heated on it. Rock is made from dirt having a lot of pressure over time, right? And it's more solid. So, you could either search down far enough to grab a slab of rock that would work, or even try creating your own."
"She's right. You might be able to." Isaake sounded intrigued at the idea. I bet he was going to make Ollie experiment.
"I've never tried." Ollie thought about it. "Another time. Right now, we need to eat and get out there. The trials start soon." He carried the hardtack outside to dispose of it.
Isaake walked over with some hardtack in hand while Nick went to wake up his brother. The biscuit didn't sit right on my stomach as I ate. That had more to do with what I was about to see than the food though. Someone might die today. If not today, then tomorrow. I don't know if I'm ready to watch someone die.
The aspirantium were lined up in front of the cave already when we made our way there. The officials were grouped together near the cave entrance. I saw Judge send an annoyed look our way when we made it to the others. Better late than never. We stood off to the side not coming closer to show support. It's like they were clearly saying 'we are here only because we have to be'.
"As I was saying," The minister cleared his throat at the interruption. "One by one you will enter the cave with me. When the trial is over you will either walk out beside me or I will walk out alone to gather the next aspirans. We will break you down into groups for each day. At the end of each day, we will gather to mourn the fallen and rejoice the risen. I will warn you now, you have officially entered the trials and there is no turning back from this point. Pray and rejoice for soon you will be gifted!" The boys and men in front of him shouted in encouragement. Everyone was hyped up to obtain power.
I watched as Judge and Alexander split the group of twenty-five into five groups of five. The first group was led forward as the other groups were ushered further back. I guess this was today's group.
"Do we get to go into the cave?" I whispered out. Immediately, I felt the head pressure from Nick as he connected all of us. "Sorry," I spoke through the connection.
We stood for a moment waiting to make sure no one heard me. No one noticed. Guess it was a good thing we stood away from the others and that everyone was so focused on the task at hand.
"No, only the aspirans and the minister go through the cave. It's part of the ritual." Isaake let me know. Something the minister had said bothered me. I watched as a man around my age stepped forward from the group and entered with the minister.
"What did he mean about walking out with him or he walks out alone?"
"If you aren't gifted you die. Your body doesn't always accept it and gives out from the strain." Raynor spoke up sounding tense.
"But what did he mean by that? Wouldn't the...wouldn’t the body be brought out to be buried? Does he bury them in there himself?"
Maybe it was more literal. Like he was saying either walk out or be dragged out kind of thing. Shivers racked my body. I still wasn't okay with the idea of seeing dead people.
"The body stays inside. I don't know what he does with them." Isaake admitted and his brows furrowed again.
"Have none of you questioned this?" I asked in disbelief. "He spills blood and keeps dead bodies. That's some freaky shit." I started rubbing my arms.
I may have just been creating a conspiracy theory that makes the minister the bad guy, or I may be right, and he is the bad guy. It doesn't add up.
"It's what we have always been taught. There was a different minister when we entered the trials and it was the same way. Why question what you've always known?" Isaake pointed out.
"Why did you question the way children should be treated and decide someplace else was better for them?" I countered.
"Because Weetamoo taught us a better way," Isaake said softly. Ollie clenched his fist before nodding in agreement.
"She taught us there was more, something different," Ollie added. I didn't know what to say to that. Weetamoo wasn't here anymore, but if it took looking at it from her perspective to open their eyes, then so be it.
"What would Weetamoo say about the trials?" I asked and received silence as the men thought about what I had said.
A part of me felt disappointed that I had to ask them to think about something by bringing in another person’s perspective that they trusted. I wanted the
m to trust me. I knew that was selfish thinking though, when we didn't truly know each other.
Fifteen minutes after the two men disappeared, and the screams started. The aspirantium shifted nervously and the men who had been a part of the trials before looked as if it was expected. When the volume of the screams rose and then cut out, my men tensed around me.
We waited in silence another fifteen minutes or so before the minister stepped outside of the cave. He came out alone. I kept looking behind him waiting for the man to emerge. I couldn't even remember his hair color and felt weird trying to think of what I was supposed to be looking for. It didn't matter, I knew he was dead. I couldn't even be relieved at not having to see the body. I just couldn't stop thinking about what color the guy's hair might have been.
When I saw the minister entering again with a boy, I tried to take note of the boy's hair and facial features. I needed to remember. I just needed to know who to look for coming out. I felt pressure on my chest and looked down not seeing anything. I went to touch the spot then realized it was my hand. I was already squeezing my chest and couldn't see in my invisible state.
"You've got to get me in there." I blurted out through the connection. "I need to know what's happening." Brown, I reminded myself. The boy's hair was brown, and he had a wide nose.
"You can't go in there." Isaake tried to tell me but I was already freaking out and didn't want to listen.
"I get it, I'm not Weetamoo and you don't trust me." I saw the men stiffen up and shoot incredulous looks towards the empty space in between them. "But I'm questioning this. I'm going to figure out what's going on. Because blood, weird languages, and missing dead bodies sounds a whole lot more like sacrifice than it does some divine trial." I made to step between Raynor in front of me and Ollie to the right of me, but Isaake reached out and grabbed onto my arm.
"It's not that." He spoke allowed.
"Isaake." Ollie hissed. Isaake cringed and dropped his hand. I was gone the next moment and entering the dark caves.
28
Raynor
"She's gone." Isaake grated out.
"Zounds!" Nick harshly whispered and called out for her through the connection. "Fuck!" He resorted to her curse word. I liked that word myself, much more satisfying than "sard".
She was going to ignore him; I knew without having to wait for the silence. A pressure in my head told me Nick dropped the connection.
"Why the hell did you stop him?" I cracked my fingers knuckle by knuckle. Focus and keep busy, keep the restlessness inside.
"I didn't try to stop him." Ollie defended rubbing his face. "He was holding on to the air and talking as if speaking to a ghost. The last thing we need is for Judge to have a reason to sic Alexander on us."
"No, the last thing we need is Tess to die because you weren't listening to her!" Nick defended stepping closer to Ollie.
"I was listening to her." He grated out through clenched teeth. "She jumped to conclusions and took off. I didn't think she would take off without any kind of plan."
"Guys, cool it down. We are getting attention." Isaake pointed out.
"You have nothing to say in this manner either." Nick got in Isaake's face then. "The two of you are so hung up on Weetamoo and flaunting that shit in her face like she isn't good enough as compared to your dead girlfriend."
I stepped up behind Nick and grabbed his arm bringing him back before things got out of control. When he went to speak again, I squeezed his arm in a warning and looked around. Isaake was right. Some of the aspirantium was looking our way curiously.
"This isn't helping her," I spoke in his ear. "She's in there right now and we need to get her out safely. Save the argument and work on getting her out." I pointed out before releasing him.
Ollie should be stepping up to fix this, but he was tightened like a coil ready to spring. The three men carried tension and looked ready to fight again. I guess I'm going to have to sort this out.
"Isaake can you keep up the Illusion on her or will it wear off?"
"If I know where she is, it might stay. I can't see her though and don't know." He admitted and looked worried at the thought.
"Nick tell her to tell us where she is," I commanded him. He was looking more frazzled then I had ever seen him right then.
"She's not listening to me. You try."
"You dropped the connection with me. Try again." I commanded him. He nodded and closed his eyes focusing everything on Tessa. It was the best I could think of right now.
"Can you figure out where she is without her answering?" Isaake asked.
"Since when can I pinpoint a person’s location?" He muttered angrily.
"He's right," Ollie spoke up. "She was trying to tell me I could use the Earth in a different way this morning. So, try to use your gift in a different way. Anytime you want to connect with us you can, so you must be able to pinpoint us. Think about your connection with her and figure it out." Finally, Ollie was getting his bearings back by focusing on the problem.
The boys screams started up as his trial took place.
I started pacing as Nick focused in on the connection. Without me doing something, that energy was jumping through my skin again. I hated getting worked up and feeling it. I couldn't work it off right now and needed to find another way to deal with it. I couldn't help Tessa currently either, which was making it worse.
Tessa. Of course she took off when the others weren't listening to her. We all spoke the truth yesterday about how caring she was. She was freaking out about something happening to those men and needed to do something about it. The others should have known she would do something on her own. She has the strength inside her, and it rises up every time she needs it. I should have known. That energy sped up at my failure. One knuckle at a time. Next finger. Focus.
"I got her." Nick sounded excited. "She's moving towards us. A little way from the entrance of the room." Isaake nodded and started concentrating.
"Can you connect with me so I can see her?" Isaake asked worriedly. I watched Nick strain for a few minutes as he tried to figure it out and then both men breathed relieved breaths. "She's okay. I think I can make the Illusion again." Isaake sighed releasing the tension the rest of us were carrying.
I glanced at Ollie. He still had his jaw clenched and was looking towards the mouth of the cave. He wouldn't relax until he saw her. I didn't blame him. I looked towards the cave waiting as well.
After what felt like forever, the minister exited with a barely standing boy, no Tessa in sight. He went ahead and took the next boy into the cave.
"I got it, she's invisible." Isaake sounded strained as he concentrated. We all relaxed, relieved at the Illusion that could keep her safe. I gave him a moment looking towards the mouth of the cave before voicing my next thought.
"Are we going to talk about what just happened?" I asked the others as we settled in waiting for the woman who was driving us crazy.
"Shit, hold the connection," Isaake whispered, yanking my attention back his way. I must have made him lose his concentration. "I got her." I watched his face relax as he focused again. I looked to the cave with Ollie.
"Not until we get her back." Ollie declared.
We waited in silence so as not to distract the others again. The silence without Tessa's chatter felt louder than it ever had before.
One knuckle at a time. Focus.
29
The cave’s tunnel was dark and sloped downward. I could see a faint red light that was bouncing further ahead. I assumed it was a torch and followed forward.
Nick kept calling out in my head telling me to come back, but I was ignoring him. It seemed fair since they ignored me. There was a chance I was being petty and maybe a little jealous, but it really hurt that no one even took the time to say "you might be right", or "I'm going to have to think more about that", or even an "I heard you". Just an acknowledgement that they were listening to my concerns if nothing else. We sat in silence for thirty minutes after I questioned things and
still the men didn't listen.
The flickering red intensified, lighting up the entrance to a room on the left. Surprisingly, it felt warmer down here. I was expecting it to be colder and damp, like my tunnel trips.
Making it to the opening, I went to peek around the wall when I noticed my hand gripping the stone. It was visible. I stared disbelieving at it as I watched my fingers flicker in and out of sight. I didn't even think about Isaake not being able to reach me down here.
Fear of being seen had me huddling tight against the wall to stay out of sight. I needed to get farther in the darkness, but then I wouldn't see what the minister was doing. My heart was pounding with fear at the thought of getting caught. Still, I had to stay. I won’t let all of this have been for nothing.
I took shallow breaths and inched along the wall towards the room’s entrance. There was no noise beyond the opening, making me suspicious and curious as to what was happening. Slowly, I leaned out from the wall just enough to see with one eye. What I saw had me leaning farther until my whole head was visible.
The room seemed endless, mostly filled with boiling lava and slow-moving molten rock that continued deeper into the earth. The domed ceiling perfectly rounded the room, then disappeared into the fiery red liquid along the back to give an illusion of an end that I wasn't sure existed. In the center of the room, standing on a piece of untouched rock that jutted out above the rolling lava, was the boy. The minister stood off to the right side of the room away from the spectacle happening at the center.
And away from the woman.
In front of the boy was an ageless woman who was standing in the lava as it raised her up to his level. The liquid heat climbed up her legs concealing everything below her thighs. Her hair was long and fiery red, as if it contained an inner glow. Despite the obvious “standing in lava”, there was something else off about her. Peering closer, it looked as though she connected with the lava, as if the lava was her accessory and not a dangerous melting pool of glass, rock, and whatever else it destroys in its path.