Tiger's Dream (Tiger's Curse Book 5)
Page 13
Each step I took was weighted, like I was trying to stay upright as I strode deeper into the ocean. The farther I went, the greater the risk of drowning. Even though I was disguised, I felt recognizable, out of place, like a flower in a fruit basket. I nodded at people when necessary and made my slow way over to the bar. When the man asked what he could get for me, I stared at him mutely for a moment and then said, “Just some water, please.”
He slid me a sparkling water and I took a seat, sipping on it as I scanned the room. Nilima was the first person I noticed. She entered the party wearing a beautiful dress. Her smile was brilliant as she took the arm of a tall man who looked vaguely familiar. I sucked in a breath when I realized who it was—Anamika’s brother, Sunil. He looked just as happy as she did and much more comfortable than I would have expected considering he was from a different time.
Looking around, I recognized Kelsey’s foster parents and a few of the people who worked for Rajaram Industries. Sipping my drink, I studied Nilima and Sunil. He was deftly keeping all the other men wanting to dance with Nilima at bay. His hardened expression when anyone approached was very effective. Seeing her glare at him and lean close to give him a lecture was heartening. I smiled, happy that Nilima might have found someone, and I hoped when I told Ana that she would be pleased.
Despite my interest in them, they weren’t who I’d come to see. A kind of breathless anticipation, a churning in my stomach stole through me. When the bartender asked if I wanted a refill, I gave him a curt nod. A trickle of sweat crept down the back of my neck, and I tugged at my collar, feeling hot.
Then, all at once, the music halted and a new song began—a lovely one I remembered that Ren had written for Kelsey. My heart wrenched. Almost as one, the expectant crowd turned to watch the front of the room. Before I could prepare myself, they were there. The wedding guests cheered as the couple entered the room. Ren beamed and waved a hand as he proudly guided his new wife. He looked dashing in his sherwani coat, his dark hair slicked back, but Kelsey was breathtaking.
Once my eyes found her, I couldn’t look away. All the light in the room seemed to slant toward her, framing her lovely face. My mouth went dry and it was all I could do to inhale and exhale. Together, the couple began winding their way through the room, accepting congratulations from the well-wishers.
Inside, I was a man tormented—the teeth and claws of my tiger scratching and biting, eager to break free and attack my rival. On the outside, I was cold and numb, slowly melting like snow in the sun. The sparkling, happy melody washed over me, finding nothing to latch onto. And I sat frozen in place like a man who’d just lost everything.
My eyes clung to them. To Ren’s back, where the tailored coat clung to his warrior’s frame. To his face that looked confident, happy, full of life. And then my tawny-gold tiger eyes, hidden behind a pair of tinted glasses, sought out the one I still loved. She was a brilliant flame in her white dress, and the sweetness of seeing her as a bride pierced my chest and melted my bones.
They made their way over to me, and I sat there, as still and as mute as a statue, just staring at them as they came closer and closer and then stopped in front of me. My mouth went dry and I stopped breathing.
Ren offered a hand and said, “Thank you for coming.”
I parted my lips to reply but found I couldn’t. All I could do was give a slight nod. He cocked his head as if he was going to say something, and I thought, for a panicked second, that he might have seen through my disguise. Maybe he’d recognized my scent. But no, he no longer had that ability. It was sad to think of Ren as being just a human. But that’s what he’d wanted. He’d never embraced the tiger as I did.
Someone caught his attention and Ren’s eyes left me. I finally let out a pent-up breath. Then I inhaled. Peaches and cream. She was in front of me. Close enough to wrap my arms around her. Close enough to kiss. Her soft brown eyes twinkled and her lips slid into a sweet, welcoming smile.
Having her so close, her scent enveloping me, was like rain on parched earth. I soaked up every second. When she offered her hand, I took it gently and just held on. She shook it and then her hand slipped away. It was like someone had stolen the sun. Kelsey and her warmth had left me. Each step she took, putting more distance between us, was like a draught of slow poison that sunk into my veins bit by bit.
Nilima’s voice echoed as she spoke into a microphone. “The bride and groom will now have their first dance!”
The guests clapped and an undercurrent of comments ensued as they remarked on the couple, on the exquisite food and décor, on the beauty of the bride. My body flamed up like a dry tree in a fire when I overheard a few jealous young women saying Ren had married beneath him. I bit my lip until I could taste blood and the tang of salt.
But then the dance began.
Almost involuntarily, my eyes followed them as they made their way around the floor. They moved in absolute harmony—Ren debonair and confident with his hand pressed against Kelsey’s back. His lovely new bride had eyes only for him. Her fingers were twined in the hair at the nape of his neck, and he leaned close to press his lips to her ear and whisper something. The crowd stilled, as transfixed by the obvious love between the couple as I was.
They are happy.
The thought came to me, unbidden and unwelcome. I shoved it away like it was toxic.
I’d known they would be, but I had to see it. I’d hoped that laying eyes on the two of them at the peak of their marital bliss would do a sort of magic. Steel my resolve. Help me get over it. Get over her. But it did the opposite. Ren was getting my happily ever after. I didn’t blame him for wanting it. But I deserved it as much as he did.
Time passed and I stewed in my resentment. Then Ren and Kelsey split apart. He asked Nilima to dance while Kelsey danced with Sunil. Waiters carrying trays of delicious hors d’oeuvres stopped and offered food, but I waved them on with an irritated gesture.
Another song played and Kelsey moved from one partner to another. Almost without thinking, I stood up and straightened the jacket of my suit. Purposefully, I strode forward and waited for my chance. When the song changed again, I stood before her, capturing her hand and bowing low over it.
“May I have your next dance, young lady?” I asked.
“Yes,” she answered pleasantly. “Thank you for the honor.”
“It is I who am honored.”
The music began, and though I tried to remind myself I was playing a role, I found I was utterly undone by being near her. I let my imagination run away with me and dreamed it was our wedding day and I was her groom. That she had vowed to be mine and not my brother’s. I closed my eyes and relived a sweet kiss we’d shared so many months ago.
How could she be so close and yet so far away from me? Couldn’t she sense me? Did she think of me? Did she miss me? Regret leaving me behind?
As I looked into her eyes, I didn’t see any doubt there. The song was half over and I hadn’t even spoken to her. My fingers tightening on her waist, I said, “I was sorry to hear of the passing of your groom’s brother and grandfather.”
Her eyes fell away and then returned to my face. “Thank you. It was a great loss. Both of us wish they were here with us today.”
“Perhaps they are,” I said softly.
She didn’t respond to that except to give me a grateful smile and a nod. “How long have you worked for the company?” Kelsey asked, politely changing the subject.
“Not long,” I answered. “It was kind of your groom to invite me.” Scrambling for something else to say before she asked me more details about my supposed job, I said, “The flowers are lovely.”
“Yes. Nilima took care of all the details.”
“She even added your favorites,” I mentioned. When she frowned and tilted her head, I hastened to add, “I was tasked with sending you flowers once, many months ago.”
“Ah,” she said, accepting my lame attempt to cover my error.
Kelsey glanced over my shoulder and smiled. It
was the most breathtaking expression I’d ever seen. My nostrils flared. Ren was close. She tossed a lock of hair over her shoulder and a sparkle at her neck caught my eye. I recognized the form of the Mangalsutra and knew what it was—a traditional gift a groom offered his bride on their wedding day. But that wasn’t what had caught my attention.
Two chains, one of gold and one of blue, wrapped around each other. Diamonds and sapphire flowers chased down the length of the chains, but in the center was a teardrop diamond surrounded by lotus flower petals made of ruby. It was the ring I’d given her. The teardrop was Kelsey’s. Durga had turned it into a diamond, and the ruby gems had been fashioned from the large stone I’d won in the House of Gourds when we’d been in Shangri-La together.
I wet my lips. “Your…your Mangalsutra. I know something of the tradition but I’ve never seen one as original as this. Tell me, what does it symbolize?”
Her hand went up to her neck to finger the lotus flower. “This was a gift from Ren’s brother. I wear it to remember him.”
“Ah, I see,” I said. “I forget his name.”
“Kishan. His name was Kishan.”
I searched her face for something, anything. Regret. Pain. Longing. But all I saw was a softening. A quiet peace.
“Isn’t it, ah, traditional for the bride to wear something to help her remember the groom?” I laughed as if trying to pass off my question as casual, but it sounded forced, even to me.
“It is,” she acknowledged. “But it was Ren’s idea. Both of us wanted to honor him. If he hadn’t been so selfless, we wouldn’t be together today.”
A lump big enough to choke me swelled in my throat. I feared my emotions were plain on my face. I looked down at the shadow we cast as we danced together and had the sudden notion that my presence was casting a pall over the joyful proceedings. “It is apparent that you miss him,” I said.
“We do,” she added and her eyes glistened.
How can I do this to her? On her wedding day, no less? She remembered me as selfless, as sacrificing. Yet here I was trying to ruin what should be the happiest moment of her life. Of both their lives. My shoulders slumped, and I felt like I was wearing my shame like a too-tight necktie.
I kept silent for the rest of the song and just moved across the floor, memorizing the feel of holding her in my arms. Ren found us at the end, and just as I was handing her back to him, I looked up and locked eyes with another woman. She was disguised but she’d done a poor job. She stood out in the crowd like a peacock among pigeons.
With a nod to Ren and a quick thanks to Kelsey, I strode through the crowd and took Anamika by the arm. “What are you doing here?” I hissed as I tugged her to a darkened hallway. It was only the presence of other people that made her refrain from ripping her arm away from me.
“Kishan?” She frowned and scrutinized my face, rubbing her arm as if I’d contaminated her with germs. I’d learned about germs from Nilima, who always kept a bottle of some kind of liquid with her to prevent sickness. Germs didn’t bother me, of course, and I doubted the goddess had any idea what germs were as I’d never bothered to explain them to her.
“Who else would I be?” I asked, irritated and a bit offended that she wanted to wipe my touch away.
“You’re so…old,” she said, her pretty face turning into a grimace.
“Yeah? And you’re too…blonde,” I finished, tugging on a long lock of strawberry-blonde hair. “Ren may not have his sense of smell anymore but I can assure you that his eyes work. Even with blonde hair, they’d see you coming a mile away. What are you doing here? And why are you dressed like…like that?”
“I would ask you the same question!” she spat. Her eyes were like rusted swords, sharp enough to do damage and yet timeworn enough to cause more pain than necessary.
I ignored the steam coming from her ears and took in her clothing. The fluid silk of her halter dress clung to her frame like foam on the beach. I’d thought her green hunting garment was distracting, but the ice-blue creation she wore now was debilitating. The neck of the dress was cut low. Much lower than anything I’d ever seen Kelsey or Nilima wear. And the slit on the side exposed almost the entirety of her leg.
Swallowing, I took a step back. Not even sure how she came to be there, let alone dressed like she was. The moon shone through the window, lighting her skin with alabaster rays, and I swiped at the trickle of sweat on my temple. With her hair blonde, she looked like Aphrodite emerging from the sea. I clapped a hand on the back of my neck, wondering where to start.
She folded her arms and cut me a stern look, but my eyes drifted from hers because I was too distracted by the way the movement caused her chest to swell. The round curves of her body, entirely too exposed, in my opinion, were on display like gleaming pearls, for all the men at the party. I ripped off my jacket and held it out. “Here, put this on.”
“No. Your jacket does not match my dress.”
“Doesn’t match your…” I caught myself looking again and shook my head to clear it. “Ana, now isn’t the time to argue with me. Put it on. You’re practically naked.”
“I am not naked,” she groused as she tugged my jacket on. “Besides, your jacket is too warm.”
“Look, what you’re wearing, it’s…it’s inappropriate.”
Anamika glanced down at her body and frowned. “But there are many women in the party who are dressed in the same fashion.”
“Yes. Well…maybe that’s true.” Had it been? If there had been a woman dressed like that, I would have noticed. At least I think I would have.
“It is true. I copied a woman’s dress exactly. Only the color is different,” she said.
“Yeah?” I rubbed a hand over my cheek. “Look, even if you’re right, you’re too…too…” I waved my hand in the direction of her body, swooshing it in circles to indicate her hair. “And your face is too…” I slumped. “Ana, you just can’t wear dresses like that.”
“Why not?” she pushed, bracing her fists on her hips.
I groaned and closed my eyes.
“Is the color…unattractive?”
“No, the color is… It’s fine,” I said. “It’s very…” I paused and my eyes drifted to her full lips. “Attractive,” I finished.
“Then tell me what is wrong with it so that I can correct it in the future,” she said quietly. “I need to learn.”
Her innocent comment undid me and I was able to regain my self-assurance. This was why she needed me. I was her guide in a world she didn’t understand. “Ana, you are a very beautiful woman. Surely you know this.”
“I,” she stammered, taking a step back, suddenly hesitant. “I am a goddess.”
“Yes, but you’re also a woman. You were a beautiful woman before you were a goddess.”
“But I am disguised here. They do not know me.”
“These people might not see the goddess Durga when they look upon you, but they will see a goddess all the same.” I cupped her shoulder with my palm and squeezed reassuringly, giving her a brotherly smile. “In this time, as in many other centuries, there are some who see beauty and desire to possess it, even if the beauty does not wish to be possessed. Do you understand?”
She cocked her head to study me. “So you wish for me to be old and ugly like you,” she said and then gasped. “Is there a woman here who desires to possess you? Show me where she is and I will tell her you are not hers for possessing!”
“No, Ana. There’s no one here who desires me.”
Her frown turned into a half smile. “I suppose not. No woman wants to spoon-feed her enfeebled mate.”
The corners of my mouth lifted, and I was about to refute her remark when her eyes widened and she gasped. I turned and cursed under my breath when I saw Nilima on the arm of Sunil. He escorted her to the elevator and pushed a button. Nilima made some remark about how he’d finally learned how to push buttons, and was securing a section of her dark hair behind her ear, when his eyes lit.
Narrowing the distance be
tween them, Sunil slid his hand around the curve of her neck and lowered his mouth to hers, tentatively at first, and then he pulled her against him, angling his lips more fully against hers. Nilima’s arms slipped around his waist, and neither of them noticed when the elevator dinged, opened, and then closed again.
“Sunil,” Anamika mumbled brokenly, and before she could step around me and approach her brother, I wrapped her in my arms and made us invisible. With her luscious curves pressed tightly against my body, I swept us away in time, her tears wetting my shirt.
Chapter 9
Fasting and Famine
When we rematerialized in what I’d come to think of as our time, Anamika wrenched her body away from me so violently that she stumbled and nearly fell. I frowned. Surely I hadn’t hurt her. Ana’s chest heaved, her eyes were bright, and she stared at me as if I were a stranger—a stranger who’d betrayed her.
“Who was she?” Anamika demanded. “Tell me, Kishan. Did you know of this…this relationship?”
“I… No. I didn’t know Sunil and Nilima were falling in love.”
“Nilima?” She spat the name. “Who is that girl?”
Holding up a hand and quieting my demeanor, I said, “You’d like her, Ana. She’s my…my sister in a way. Nilima is Kadam’s great-great-granddaughter. I’m not sure how many generations removed she is, but she knows our secret. I trust her. You should too.”
“And how can I do that?” she said, her lips quivering. “You never even mentioned her. Kadam didn’t either.”
“I’m sorry. I suppose neither of us thought the two of you would have occasion to meet.”
“Does she even care for him?”
“She must. Nilima doesn’t date many men. She doesn’t let them get close. Obviously, that wasn’t true regarding Sunil. I watched them at the reception. They danced together like a planet and its moon.” I closed my eyes and sighed. “You don’t know planets,” I mumbled, then continued, explaining, “They chase one another like birds in the spring.”