Heart and Seoul (The Seoul Series Book 1)

by Erin Kinsella

  “The heart wants what it wants, and mine wants pulpless juice.”

  Eun Gi took his own painkillers and dug out a pair of soft ice packs from the freezer. He sat next to her, leaning his head back and setting one on his forehead before offering the other to her.

  “I feel awake and tired at the same time,” Eun Gi mused. “Adrenaline is a bitch.”

  “Mhmm,” Tessa agreed, nursing her drink.

  By the time the painkillers kicked in they were both drooping. He fell asleep slack-jawed, head resting on the back of the couch, his arm draped over her waist while she tumbled into sleep with her cheek pillowed on his thigh.

  Tessa

  “So, want to tell us what happened?”

  Tessa cracked open her good eye. Sung Soo, Min Jae, and Hwan all stood in a line in front of her. Her toasty pillow shifted, and she froze as last night rushed back. She sat up gingerly. There was a steady throb in her skull, the weight and warmth of Eun Gi’s arm across her, the sour taste in her mouth from the orange juice.

  Only a groan came out when she went to speak.

  Moving bad. So bad.

  She inched back down and closed her eyes. She didn’t even care that she’d fallen asleep on her idol. Other matters were far more pressing, like the gremlins burrowing out of her skull with jackhammers. Painkillers were needed to subdue them.

  Eun Gi shifted beneath her. “Someone smother me. It hurts to exist.”

  “Well, I would,” said Sung Soo, “but then you’d miss filming, and I don’t think the studio would like that.”

  “Fuck.” Eun Gi groaned. “I can’t go to filming.”

  “You’re welcome to phone and explain the situation to them, though I’d love to know exactly what it is first.”

  Eun Gi mumbled a brief explanation, but Tessa didn’t pay much attention.

  “I feel like we should take you two to the clinic,” Sung Soo said. “You might have concussions.”

  “Need sleep,” Tessa murmured. “And drugs.”

  “If you can’t wake up properly, that’s a bad sign.” Sung Soo prodded her shoulder.

  “I got three hours of sleep. There is no awake-Tessa on three hours of sleep.”

  “Tessa, I have to pee,” Eun Gi whispered.

  “Pillows don’t pee.”

  Eun Gi hissed as he moved, and wrangled an actual pillow under her cheek as he did so.

  “Oh shit,” they heard from the bathroom. “I look like I’ve been hit in the face with a rock.”

  “Just my head.” Tessa nuzzled her pillow.

  Sung Soo laughed, deep and hearty, sinking onto the perpendicular couch. “You were only left alone for a few hours, and somehow you manage this.”

  “And you say I’m the one who shouldn’t be unsupervised,” Min Jae quipped.

  “I still stand by that assessment.” Sung Soo smiled indulgently. “You’re no better than these two. How am I supposed to get anything done being hyung to this unruly batch of maknae? Where’s the justice in the world?”

  “Hyung, you’re a millionaire with six best friends and millions of people around the world who love you,” Min Jae pointed out.

  “Way to ruin my dramatics.” Sung Soo pouted and turned to Tessa. “Will you go to the doctor?”

  Tessa nodded and immediately regretted it. “Fuck. Ow.” She cradled her head in her hands pitifully.

  “I’ll call Kyung Mi to take you both over. Please stay awake for a little while, and you can sleep later,” Sung Soo said. “Hwan, can you go get the dak juk from our apartment for their breakfast? Jae, can you please find Eun Gi’s phone so he can call the studio?”

  “You got it, Hyung!” Min Jae disappeared into the bedroom and emerged triumphant with the phone while Hwan carted the steaming pot over.

  Sung Soo gave them another dose of painkillers and settled them on the couches so they were easy to monitor. Eun Gi got off the hook with the studio, and Tessa nibbled at the savory porridge.

  Kyung Mi arrived while they were eating. Entirely unimpressed, she sighed, absorbing their state.

  “I’m starting to wonder if you need more supervision,” Kyung Mi said. “How have things been progressing otherwise?”

  “It’s okay.” Tessa shrugged. “We’re still adjusting.”

  Kyung Mi prodded her charge. “Eun Gi?”

  “It’s fine. It’s only been a couple days.”

  “But you’re amiable?”

  Both nodded.

  “Good. I was a bit worried, but I have every confidence in you both. Now, go get dressed for the day, and I’ll take you to get checked over.”

  The doctors they went to see worked in association with EchoPop, handling all their idols.

  “You both have very minor concussions, so you’ll need to rest for today, but you should otherwise have no concerns.” The doctor ran down a list of potential symptoms with instructions for Kyung Mi to bring them back if needed. No broken toes were found on Tessa’s X-ray and her cut was sealed up.

  “You two will have to wear makeup when you go out,” Kyung Mi said as they drove back. “We don’t want an abuse scandal on top of everything else.”

  Eun Gi’s face scrunched up, altogether appalled. “I’d never hit her.”

  “We know that,” Kyung Mi said, “but the media sees what it wants, as you’ve experienced. It’s better to avoid giving them anything to run with.”

  Tessa glanced around the car. “I’m not great at doing makeup. Do you think we could hire someone to help for a bit?”

  “No harm in asking,” said Kyung Mi. “I’ll check with the company.”

  “You don’t have to do any of that,” Eun Gi said. “I can do it.”

  Tessa turned to him skeptically. “Really?”

  “Well, I’m not good with dramatic styles, but we all have a lot of experience with basic makeup.”

  Kyung Mi looked hard at him as they pulled into their parking stall outside the apartment building. “You do have the skill needed. I’d be comfortable letting you handle it.”

  Min Jae was already at the door when they punched in the code.

  “Noona, you’re alive!” Min Jae cried, pulling Tessa into a hug.

  “Of course. It’ll take a lot more than Eun Gi’s head to get rid of me.”

  “Both of you get some rest. Stay out here so someone can keep an eye on you. I have some work to do at the studio, but call if me you need anything.” Kyung Mi settled them in before heading off.

  A throbbing pulse of pain broke through the haze of exhaustion. When she opened her eyes Eun Gi was stretched out on the other couch, and Hwan was sitting on the floor between them with his laptop. She made a sound of protest over her existence and Hwan glanced over.

  “You’re awake?” he asked.

  “Yes? Mostly.” She sat up gingerly, regretting every inch upwards.

  He picked up his phone and read off a message from Sung Soo. “I’m supposed to ask if you have any nausea, ringing in your ears, or dizziness.”

  Tessa ran through her body and found nothing out of the ordinary besides the pain in her head. “No.”

  “Good. Eun Gi doesn’t either. Are you feeling well enough to eat more? Do you need ice for your foot? Do y—?”

  “Hwan, shhhhh.” Tessa pressed a finger to his lips, and he startled like a baby deer at the contact, though he was wedged against the corner where the couches met and had nowhere to go. Tessa withdrew her hand guiltily, and Hwan puffed out a relieved breath. “Sorry.”

  Her phone buzzed.

  Kelly:

  Checking in. How’s life with the idols?

  Tessa rubbed her good eye and focused on her screen.

  Tessa:

  I’m minorly concussed, but no broken toes

  A video call rang immediately, and Kelly’s face filled the screen. “Oh my God, look at you! Tess, I’m coming to get you.”

  “Wait, what?” She blinked sleepily.

  “Why are you concussed? What happened? Why didn’t anyone call
me?” Her expression shifted. “They’d better not be hiding anything. Did he hurt you? I’ll kill him. I swear to God I will come over there right now and put his balls in a vise.”

  “Shhhh. It’s fine.” The ferocity in Kelly’s voice renewed the throbbing in Tessa’s head.

  “It’s not fine. You’re hurt. What happened?”

  “It was an accident.”

  “Tess, I don’t want you to feel like you have to defend him if he did something. I’m here to help you. If he hurt you, I need to know.”

  “I promise it was an accident. I tripped.”

  There was silence for a few moments. “That sounds unconvincing.”

  “I’m safe. It’s okay. He’s concussed too. Our heads smashed together when it happened.” Tessa turned the phone to show her a still-sleeping Eun Gi with a rapidly darkening bruise on his forehead.

  “You’re absolutely sure you’re safe?” Kelly whispered.

  “Yes, I swear on everything I love, and if that changes you’ll be the first person to know.”

  Kelly let out a breath. “Okay. Keep me posted.”

  “I will I promise. I love you.”

  “I love you too, Tess. Take care of yourself. I’m going to kick Sung Soo’s ass for not telling me what’s up.” Kelly huffed and hung up.

  “Remind me never to upset your friend.” Hwan sat with wide eyes. “I have no idea what she said, but she sounds scary.”

  “She’s worried. I always believed her when she told me she’d fight a bear for me.”

  “She’d win.”

  “No argument here.”

  Her bladder made itself known, vying for attention over her viciously growling stomach.

  She toed slowly across the living room and relieved herself before making the delicate journey back.

  Hwan nudged Eun Gi. “Wake up.”

  “No.” Eun Gi burrowed into the couch, hissing when his forehead made contact.

  Hwan rolled his eyes. “Tessa is awake.”

  Eun Gi peeled open an eye. “I feel like I’ve been run over.”

  “You look it too.” Hwan grinned cheekily. “Hye Jin will have her work cut out for her tomorrow.”

  “Hwan, please. It’s too early to hear her name.”

  “It’s not early. You slept in. Are we not allowed to talk about her at all even though you’re working with her?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “You’ll have to someday.”

  “And today is not that day. Drop it.”

  “Fine, keep your secrets. It’s not like I’m desperate to know anyway.” Hwan huffed and left them to go heat up their breakfast in the kitchen.

  “That’s definitely a lie.” Eun Gi sat up carefully. “Gossip is your lifeblood.”

  “Which means you know how much you’re hurting me by not telling me.”

  Tessa watched the exchange with a warmth in her chest that almost distracted her from her head.

  “Noona—” Hwan turned to her, “—tell Eun Gi he needs to share.”

  “No way am I helping fill your gossip quota. My head hurts too much for information weaseling.”

  Hwan shook his head. “Tsk, Noona. No dedication to the cause.”

  Chapter 9

  Tessa

  “Hold still.”

  Tessa squirmed. “I’m trying. I don’t like things coming at my eye.”

  Eun Gi braced his hand behind Tessa’s head as he carefully applied her concealer. Only a few inches of air occupied the space between them. Heat radiated from his body, and she smothered the riot of feelings jumping around inside her.

  His eyes, a ring of gold at the centre fading through warm brown to almost black at the outer edge, concentrated on her.

  He examined his work closely. The hand cupping her head was gentle and intimate, and her gaze helplessly drifted to his lips. There they were. Plump. Perfect.

  Tessa ordered herself to focus.

  Everything about him was inviting, and dammit all, she wanted him. She’d thought about what it would be like to kiss him more times than she was willing to admit.

  It would be so easy to lean forward and find out what it was actually like.

  The brush swept away the purple of the bruising, helping it disappear into her golden skin. She’d packed makeup, but had only the bare basics to be used with Kelly’s assistance.

  Eun Gi sat back. His brows pinched together, and he picked up the brush again, applying a little more to the other half of her face. He leaned closer, and Tessa’s hands shot up to rest against his chest with a soft gasp.

  “You’re very close.”

  “Sorry.” He backed up immediately. “I was trying to make sure it matched.”

  “Does it?” Her mouth went dry, and she licked her lips.

  His eyes followed her tongue’s path and drifted back up. “Hmm?”

  “Match?” She sat frozen.

  The brush swiped against her face, and she blinked sharply, jolting back, butt sliding into the basin.

  “Yes.”

  “The sink was wet,” Tessa lamented.

  “You’ll dry. Let me help you out.”

  He looped one of her arms around his neck and scooped under her legs to hoist her up. Tessa stopped breathing until her feet hit the floor. He lifted her like she was nothing. No one ever lifted her like she was nothing. She was nearly six feet tall, had been so since she was sixteen, and even the best-intentioned suitors had struggled. Eun Gi didn’t even break a sweat.

  Her heart did uncomfortable things, and she stepped away, running from the intimacy and into her bedroom to change. She closed the door and whimpered pitifully to herself. Tessa picked up her phone to bother Kelly with her nonsense.

  Tessa:

  I’m so stupid

  Kelly:

  How so?

  Tessa:

  I want to kiss him

  I almost did

  Kelly:

  !!!!

  TELL ME EVERYTHING!

  Tessa groaned and dumped herself onto the bed. Rolling over, she clutched the phone like a lifeline, typing out a frantic word vomit.

  Kelly:

  Tess, you’re the cutest goddamn thing in existence

  Of course you want to kiss him

  When have you ever NOT wanted to kiss UpBeat???

  She was in the middle of thinking up a response when Kelly interrupted her thoughts.

  Kelly:

  Besides

  You’re fake engaged

  That doesn’t mean you can’t eventually be real engaged

  Tessa:

  You sound like my mom

  Kelly:

  Well we’re both right. But seriously. Kiss him. Do it. DO IT!

  Tessa:

  But that could make it weird

  Kelly:

  Weirder than cohabitating with a fake fiancé?

  Tessa:

  Fair point. BUT STILL. I’m awkward af and I can’t just kiss him

  Kelly:

  Well then give off vibes so that he thinks about kissing you

  Tessa:

  I’m ending this conversation

  Kelly:

  BUT I LOVE YOU

  Tessa:

  Still ending it <3

  Tessa laughed and tossed the phone aside to pick out some dry pants. By the time she emerged Eun Gi was waiting for her by the door, his own bruise carefully concealed.

  Eun Gi

  “Eomeoni, no!” Eun Gi sat straight up in bed, covered in a cold sweat. He buried his face in his hands. “Fuck.”

  Climbing out of bed, away from the sheets that were strangling him, he pulled off his damp T-shirt and shook himself. His heart thundered and the darkness enveloped him. He took the familiar route to the kitchen to get some water and then slumped onto the couch with his glass, sipping slowly to calm the cloying panic.

  “You’re fine. You’re safe in Seoul,” he muttered to himself.

  He shuddered, and whipped his head up when a glow illuminated un
der Tessa’s door. Silence descended as he waited. Her shadow blocked some of the light, and the door pulled open, revealing her, sleepy-eyed and in her pajamas.

  “You’re awake.” Her hair was fuzzy all over, and it was clear she’d been woken up by his fussing.

  Good going.

  When he didn’t respond she crossed the living room. “Are you okay?”

  “Fine,” he forced out.

  Tessa flicked on a lamp, and her eyes went wide. She dropped to her knees in front of him, and he jerked back as her palm came to rest on his forehead. “You’re clammy. Do you have a fever?”

  “I’m fine,” he said again, throat tight. He leaned away from her touch, goose bumps running down his arms.

  “Hold still. I’m trying to help.”

  “You don’t need to help.”

  He didn’t want to want her help.

  But he did.

  She was looking at him like she cared, like he mattered to her.

  “What can I do?” Her palm was back on his forehead, and this time he let it rest there. “Hmm, it’s a little bit better. How do you feel?”

  “Tessa, I’m fine. It was a… What’s the word in English? A bad dream.”

  “A nightmare?”

  “Yeah.”

  It was nearly two in the morning, and he dreaded being awake all night. She shifted, and he got distracted by her eyes, which were dark and welcoming in the low light.

  “Mamãe always used to let me climb into her bed when I had nightmares,” Tessa told him.

  Eun Gi’s heart thumped. If it had been Hwan in her room he’d have joined him, gotten a fitful couple hours of sleep, and been a surly beast the next day. Going to one of the others was an option, but it was so much less embarrassing when he only had to walk across the living room rather than slinking down the hall and into another apartment in the dead of night.

  What would it feel like to climb into the bed while she was there, soft and warm, arms open to him?

  “Not that that’s helpful right now,” she amended. “But if you needed to, I mean, I’m just saying, you could. I’ll shut up.”