Heart and Seoul (The Seoul Series Book 1)

by Erin Kinsella

“You’ll rebuild. Losing your social media presence for a little while won’t change the impact you’ve had on your fans. They’ll find you, even if you have to restart. Why don’t you have a shower and I’ll find you something to wear to bed?”

  “I don’t think I can rest anymore. God, I wish tampons weren’t so hard to find in this country. I don’t like them, but I want to sit in the bath.”

  “All the more reason to shower. Maybe the hot water will help.”

  He bundled her off to the bathroom and spent too long staring at the closed door.

  His phone buzzed in his hand.

  Yuna:

  Why haven’t you been outside yet today?

  Eun Gi:

  Tessa is sick and we’re dealing with some security issues. We’re staying in.

  Yuna:

  Unless she’s dying you need to go out

  Eun Gi stared at the screen.

  Eun Gi:

  I’m not making her go out

  Yuna:

  Don’t force me to get someone higher up involved. The sponsors paid for this exposure and you’re going to give it to them whether you want to or not.

  Eun Gi huffed and tossed the phone aside. Yuna wasn’t his priority. Tessa emerged damp and miserable. Black underwear peeked beneath the hem of the towel wrapped around her torso. Her eyes were glazed with pain as she slumped towards him.

  “Any better?”

  She shrugged. “I guess. It’s nice to be clean at least.”

  “Let me help with your hair?” Yuna had packed them a blow dryer, but not any extra clothes, he marveled. At least it would prove useful. “Do I have to do anything fancy for curls?”

  “Use the diffuser attachment and don’t brush them, or it’ll poof.”

  Eun Gi nodded, sitting behind Tessa on the bed. Sodden strands dried under his careful attention, falling into silken coils. He’d always loved getting his hair done.

  His phone buzzed insistently, but he ignored it after sparing a glance to see it was Yuna again.

  When he finished with Tessa’s hair, he applied firm pressure to her shoulders. She groaned and leaned into it, the knots in her muscles loosening under the onslaught. He eased her down onto the bed and fetched the hotel lotion from the bathroom. She melted in his hands. Eun Gi worked carefully down her body, digging into her hips.

  Tessa’s brow pinched.

  “Okay?”

  “It hurts so good. It’s fine, keep going.”

  He shifted, and she gasped into the blankets.

  “Oh my God, where did you learn this?”

  “Trial and error mostly. Dance practice, workouts, and performances take their toll. The company doesn’t exactly give trainees and fresh debut groups access to personal massage therapists. Sometimes we woke up with muscle spasms and relied on assistance from one another to get it under control.”

  She hissed and gripped the pillow fiercely as he released a stubborn knot. His touch gentled into long sweeps before moving to her neck. The muscles there stretched like steel under her skin.

  “How do you live like this?” Eun Gi asked.

  “I have a high pain tolerance.”

  When she called for a break, he laid down, and she plastered herself to him, head on his chest.

  “Thank you.” Her voice was soft as she traced little swirls over his skin.

  “You’re welcome. I just want you to feel better.”

  She released a heavy sigh. “I do.”

  Eun Gi swallowed hard, uncomfortable with the growing tenderness in his chest. He wasn’t ready to face this quite yet. “I don’t want to ask, but Yuna is insisting we go out today.”

  Tessa made a sound of disapproval.

  “I know.” He set his palm against her cheek. “We only have to be out long enough for pictures so the sponsors don’t pitch a fit.”

  She pouted. “Do we have to?”

  “I’m not forcing you to go. I’ll go on my own while you rest.”

  She sighed, shoulders drooping. “No, it’ll be weird if you’re out alone. Can you do my makeup? I’m sure I look like a trash pile.”

  “You definitely do not look like a trash pile. I’m not convinced it’s even possible for that to happen. You’re just a little paler than usual.”

  She patted his cheek. “You’re so sweet to lie to me like that. I saw myself in the mirror.”

  “And I’m looking at you right now, and I’m telling you you’re beautiful.”

  Her mouth dropped into an O, and she leaned into the hand still cradling her face. His heart gave an uncomfortable squeeze.

  “You don’t have to do a thing. Sit here. I’ll do your makeup and find what’s most comfortable in your suitcase, which, let’s be real, none of it is truly comfortable, but I propose we pick you up some soft pajamas while we’re out.”

  Tessa pulled the pillow to her chest while he gathered supplies. She submitted patiently as he applied a fresh face on her.

  “To be clear, I’m only putting this on you because the press is a bunch of assholes.” He added some blush. “I am rather familiar with covering up sleep deprivation with makeup.”

  “You were always perfect.” Tessa toyed with the pillow.

  “I went out strategically.” He smiled indulgently. “One time I got so much stress acne that I tried to hide at the dorm for a week. Kyung Mi taught me how to do my own makeup after that.”

  “How old were you?”

  “Sixteen. It was not a good time.” He swept blush over her cheeks. “Alright, should be good to go.”

  He dug through her suitcase, pulled out the softest item he could find, and handed it to her.

  She stared at it with distaste before huffing and disappearing into the bathroom with it. Eun Gi pulled out his own sponsor clothing to match what he’d picked out for Tessa. Her expression of misery tempered how cute she looked in the short-sleeved red satin dress.

  He gave Yuna two hours of their time. Long enough to get Tessa some street tteokbokki, and for the lurking cameras to capture some pictures. She hid behind her sunglasses and a broad-rimmed hat that protected her from the worst of the sun, but he still noticed her hiss whenever they stepped out of the shade. Determined to let her rest, he sent a text to Yuna.

  Eun Gi:

  We’re going back to the hotel. Whatever pictures they’ve gotten will have to be enough.

  Tessa was asleep as soon as she hit the bed. He set her hat aside and put her sunglasses on the bedside table, smoothing back her hair before properly tucking her under the blanket. Eun Gi packed up the majority of their bags before allowing himself to lie down next to her. She reached out in her sleep, fingers curling against his shirt. The swell of emotion left him breathless. He fell asleep with their hands interlaced.

  The next day they didn’t have to be at the airport until early afternoon. Tessa felt mostly human, albeit stressed to capacity. She was on her phone constantly, blocking new trolls and checking in with her assistant as her website was brought under control again. Once it was time to get on the flight back to Seoul, Eun Gi encouraged her to take a break.

  They were back in their apartment before it was dark.

  “I’ll check in with the guys so we don’t have all three over here before you’ve had time to settle.”

  Tessa looked up from the tea she was steeping and smiled gratefully. “Sounds good. I’ll be here.”

  The others launched from their resting places to ambush him the second he opened the door wide enough to fit a human. Min Jae hung off him like a koala, and Eun Gi grunted at the weight. Sung Soo and Hwan kept him upright, but only because they were desperately hugging him as well.

  “I was only gone for four days.”

  “Hyung, four days is a long time,” Min Jae protested. “Where’s Noona?”

  Eun Gi tried to wriggle free, but no one was ready to let go quite yet.

  “She’s resting. She’s not feeling well.”

  He waddled the group farther into the apartment so they could sprea
d out onto one of the couches.

  “Is Noona coming for dinner?” Min Jae asked. “Hyung made extra.”

  “I’ll check when I go back over.”

  “So, how was Jeju?” Sung Soo asked. “You didn’t make a peep for days besides updating us about the security breach. Did something else happen?”

  Even if he wanted to hide it from them, it would be obvious soon enough. “Yes.”

  Min Jae hurled himself onto Eun Gi’s lap. “Tell us everything.”

  Eun Gi let out an oomph, and his eyes watered. “Jae, you’re crushing me.”

  “Talk fast and I’ll uncrush. What happened with Noona?”

  Unsure how much to say, Eun Gi took a breath to stall. “We decided to try out an actual relationship.”

  “Damn, I owe Kelly fifty thousand won,” Hwan lamented.

  “What?”

  They were all suddenly sheepish and avoiding eye contact.

  “Did you bet on us?”

  “Only a little,” Sung Soo said. “Kelly guessed you’d get together a lot sooner than we did.”

  “I didn’t expect it would happen at all,” Eun Gi confessed.

  “Oh, we know.” Hwan grinned. “But we’re not blind. She was into you from day one and you got along well enough. You’re not subtle, even though you think you are. It was pretty obvious you two would step over that line eventually.”

  “We all approve,” Sung Soo added. “We like Tessa and if you want to actually be with her, then we’ll support you.”

  Eun Gi slumped back against the couch and Min Jae hopped off to take over the nearest spot.

  “I wish I was good at this sort of thing,” Eun Gi said.

  “Well, it’s not like the rest of us are any better,” Hwan commented. “You’re the most romantically experienced of the lot of us.”

  “That gives me no confidence at all.” He stared up at the ceiling, the others exchanging a glance between them.

  “Even if we had more experience, each relationship is different,” Sung Soo pointed out. “Tessa is a whole new person, and you have to learn as you go. Figure out what works for the two of you.”

  Eun Gi pouted. He didn’t want to mess things up because of something he hadn’t figured out yet. Darker thoughts tugged at him. Min Jae thwapped him in the face with a pillow, and Eun Gi sat up like he’d been shot.

  “Hyung, stop thinking so hard.” Min Jae grinned. “You always get this weird look when you disappear into your head. It’ll be fine. Noona is awesome. You just need to not be stupid.”

  Don’t be stupid. That was easier said than done, but Eun Gi would certainly try.

  He laughed. “I can’t decide if it takes the pressure off or not that we’re already married. I don’t have to wonder where it’s headed because we’re already there.”

  “Well,” Sung Soo said, “I guess the question instead will be if you want to stay that way.”

  Chapter 18

  Tessa

  The sound of the sea had been replaced by the ebb and flow of traffic outside the window. Tessa sat on the couch with her tea and sipped it while slogging through the mass of emails she’d left unattended during their honeymoon. Her whole system was a mess after the breach, but the worst of it had tapered off. The trolls still bombarded her accounts, but Amelia had done a good job of blocking them as they appeared, with Kelly’s help flagging the ones commenting in Korean. Tessa’s new phone number was so far secure.

  She was glad to settle back into her work routine, and also to be in her own clothes again. Designer outfits were lovely, but they couldn’t provide the same comfort as her well-worn pajamas. Luxuriating in bundling herself into the soft blankets on the couch, she was grateful it was an option because she didn’t have the energy to pretend to not be in pain.

  The door code beeped.

  “Incoming maknae!” Eun Gi yelled a moment before Min Jae flew through the opening, launching himself at the opposite couch.

  “Noona, you’re home!” He moved to hug her and then stopped himself, frozen in midair. “Hyung said you’re sick. Are hugs okay?”

  “Hugs are fine.” Tessa was enveloped as soon as the words left her mouth. His enthusiasm was infectious. She let out a little squeak. “You’re squashing me.”

  Min Jae released her immediately. “Sorry, Noona. Do you want to come for dinner?”

  “If you don’t mind me in pajamas.”

  Jae’s head whipped towards Eun Gi. “We could all wear pajamas so Noona doesn’t feel left out.”

  Eun Gi laughed. “Sometimes I forget you’re an actual adult.”

  “Hyung, that’s rude.” Min Jae pouted. “Who doesn’t love wearing pajamas?”

  “Ok, we’ll do a pajama dinner. Go change and let the others know. We’ll be over in a few minutes.”

  Min Jae crushed him in a hug on his way out the door. “I’m glad you’re home.”

  Tessa pressed her hands to her cheeks, a smile overpowering her features. “He’s so cute! He missed you a lot.”

  “You should have seen them when I first went in. It was like someone let loose a pack of golden retrievers at me.”

  She grinned helplessly. His brow were pinched with a slight hint of annoyance, but his tone was soft with affection. He loved it more than he was willing to admit.

  “I love that you all have such a close relationship. It’s so sweet.”

  His brow smoothed, a smile adorning his face. “I think so too.”

  He disappeared into the bedroom to change and emerged in a dark-blue pajama set with white polka dots.

  “You look comfy.”

  “Oh, I am.” He swished his hands over the fabric. “It’s satin.”

  He moved close enough for her outstretched hand to touch. Her fingers slid up his arm. “Very silky.”

  Eun Gi dropped down in front of her. “We should go to dinner, or I might get distracted and kiss you.”

  “You could kiss me and then we could go to dinner?” Tessa suggested.

  “I like this compromise.”

  Tessa had never considered herself to be touch-starved. She was an introvert by nature and loved her quiet time alone, but sitting snuggled up to Eun Gi on the couch while his best friends chattered happily had its appeal. They made it known she was welcome to join the conversation, but mostly she enjoyed listening to them. Eun Gi’s fingers twirled randomly in her hair, brushing over her scalp in a haphazard, rhythmic fashion that had her drifting in and out of focus against him.

  She closed her eyes and listened to the cadence of his voice. The words blurred into the sound of his excitement, his contemplation as he answered questions, punctuated by laughter.

  Her chest bloomed with warmth when she woke in the morning and found herself in her bed. She must have dozed off and Eun Gi carried her back over. He was conked out and sprawled out next to her.

  He was so peaceful when he was asleep, or at least when he wasn’t having nightmares. The stress of the day was gone from his face, leaving him looking soft and younger than his twenty-five years. She brushed at some unruly strands of his hair, just because she could.

  Tessa snuggled into her pillow and watched the steady rise and fall of his chest. Three words danced on the tip of her tongue, but they were too much to say out loud. She’d been saying she loved him for years, but the crush she’d nursed seemed so silly now, pale in comparison to the emotions churning inside her.

  His eyes peeked open.

  “Good morning.” She grinned.

  He rolled towards her and snared her in his arms. “Did you want to go around Seoul today? I mentioned it last night, but you’d already nodded off. We could invite Kelly and Min Joo, all go together. I keep thinking it’s a shame you’ve been here over a month and have hardly seen anything in the city.”

  “I’d love to. I’d planned on going with Kelly my first week here, but you know how that went.”

  “Perfectly?”

  Tessa snort-laughed and buried her face in her hands. “Oh my God. You’
re such a cheeseball.”

  He nuzzled up to her. “I don’t know what that means, but you’re laughing so I’m assuming it’s good.”

  “Yes.” She smacked a kiss onto his lips. “It is.”

  They settled on Gyeongbokgung Palace. Sung Soo drove Tessa and the boys while Kelly and Min Joo took the train. They’d been having Pyong Ho over for breakfast so he joined them as well.

  Gwanghwamun Gate loomed over them, a towering three-pathed entrance of white brick and a sloping decorative roof reaching into the sky. It opened onto a stone courtyard, and Tessa was struck immediately by the grandeur. They wore hats and sunglasses to blend in with the other attendees. Pyong Ho guided them through the courtyards and tucked them into the shade, where they stood among red pillars listening to his enthusiastic and intimate historical knowledge.

  People wandered around the palace in hanbok and traditional hairstyles, lending an atmosphere of living history. Tessa was the only one of the group who hadn’t been to the palace before, but no one made any fuss about waiting while she soaked in the details, snapping pictures to send home. The graceful sloping roof of each building ended with intricate carved floral patterns and brilliant colours. There were definite nods to ancient Chinese architecture, but the style was still uniquely Korean.

  Despite the number of people visiting, they stumbled upon areas that didn’t have a single soul present. The farther they went the more the palace grounds harmonized with nature. Trees obscured the telltale signs of modern Seoul, leaving only a view of historic rooftops and mountains filling the horizon. Tessa was in awe at every turn. They settled in the shade of the trees, deep in the inner recesses of the palace grounds, away from potential prying eyes and tourists with cameras hung around their necks.

  “The palace was destroyed in the late 1500s when the Japanese invaded during the Imjin War.” Pyong Ho sat down between Tessa and Hwan. “They were rather fond of torching our important buildings and the palace was razed. Thankfully King Gojong had an interest in preserving our history and oversaw most of the reconstruction.”