My Favorite Cowboy
Page 13
“You did,” Naomi said after a moment.
He rubbed his hand up and down her back. “You helped me do that. And I was willing. There’s a difference. Caleb told me years ago that he would spend his life alone. He won’t ever put his heart into a situation where a woman could leave him.”
“That’s so sad.”
“He’ll be okay. We’ll make sure of it.”
What Brice hadn’t even told his beautiful wife was that he’d long been worried about Caleb. His brother went through women faster and faster as the years went on. None lasted longer than a night. The only good thing was that Caleb had never brought them to his house.
It was one of his brother’s rules. He went back to the woman’s place so he could leave when he wanted. Much easier than asking them to go when he grew tired of them. Which was almost as soon as he’d taken his pleasure.
Brice tried to tell Caleb that he was filling his life with nights of sex to make up for his loneliness, but his brother didn’t want to hear any of it. Caleb went back to joking and laughing as if the conversation had never happened.
But Brice got the message.
All these years later, Caleb still bore the sting of their mother’s abandonment. In fact, he felt it deeper and harder than either Brice or Abby. And Abby used to think that Brice had gotten the brunt of it because Caleb was too young to remember.
She was wrong. So wrong.
Naomi lifted her head. “What is it?”
“As an outsider looking into my family, who would you think got hurt the worst from our mother leaving?”
Naomi studied him, a frown marring her brow. “It scarred Abby certainly. She was just starting her life, but she put that on hold to raise you and Caleb. But she was also older. While it hurt and obviously left her with the same abandonment issues as you and Caleb, I think she handled it better.”
“Okay.”
“You,” Naomi continued, “found the note your mother left first. You read it and realized what had happened.”
To this day, Brice remembered that sinking feeling as if someone had a hold of his ankles and was pulling him down into … nothing. He’d curled up on the floor, rocking back and forth as he wondered what he’d done to make his mother leave.
Naomi touched his cheek. “Your wounds are healing, my love, but I know you still battle them. For a long time, you didn’t realize that your mother leaving had done such damage. But when you did, you faced it head-on.”
He turned his head and kissed her palm before pulling her down to his chest. “And Caleb?”
“He didn’t react to what had happened right away. All he wanted as a six-year-old was breakfast. So, he woke Abby. She found the note and then you, and she did her best to get the world right for both of you again. But because Caleb didn’t respond the way you did, both you and Abby believed that he wasn’t affected.”
Brice swallowed. “I can’t remember if Caleb was still in bed when I got up or not. We shared a room, so I should know.”
“You never asked him?”
“It’s not something we three talk about.”
Naomi shot Brice a flat look. “Perhaps you should. Because I think there’s a real possibility that Caleb wasn’t just up, but that he saw your mother leaving.”
It felt as if Brice had been kicked in the chest. He shook his head, wanting to deny it, but it made sense. Of the three of them, Caleb was the only one adamant about being alone, about never trusting anyone enough to allow them close to hurt him.
“Oh, God,” Brice murmured.
Naomi hurried to say, “It’s pure speculation on my part.”
“Why else would he be so averse to relationships?”
“He’s not against it, love. Look at what he has with you, Jace, Cooper, Clayton, Abby, and the kids. Even Shane, for that matter.”
Brice ran a hand down his face. “It’s women.”
She nodded. “Yeah.”
“What do I do?”
“Be there for him. Whether it’s tomorrow or twenty years from now, he’s going to meet someone that makes him want to get close. If he doesn’t run away, he’s going to need his family to help steady him.”
Brice smiled down at her. “You’re part of that family as well, darlin’.”
“I love you, Brice.”
“I love you, too, Naomi.”
* * *
Dinner had been excruciating. Not because Caleb was with Audrey, but because the longer he was around her, the more he wanted her.
When she moaned at the taste of the food, he’d gone instantly, achingly hard. It was all he could do not to yank her against him and kiss her.
He slowly walked through the stables. He’d had to get out of the house for a minute. She’d insisted on cleaning the dishes, so he used the excuse of checking on his horses to leave.
“Coward,” he mumbled to himself.
Caleb had always been able to steer conversations in whatever direction he wanted—even if it was to get the woman he was with away from him. It was a skill he’d honed years ago and used ruthlessly.
One of the kids from the high school who worked part-time around the ranch had already fed the horses. With both Brice and Caleb having equal shares of the business and splitting the land, there were several barns, corrals, and pastures to maintain.
Luckily, there was never a shortage of kids who wanted to see how a ranch ran, though both he and Brice screened them diligently. You could always tell a bad apple when the horses wanted nothing to do with them. There had been a few cases that had slipped through, but they’d caught it early on and fired the kid.
The funny thing was that both of them had assumed it would take years to build their horse ranch, which would leave all the duties split between them. But they had grown so quickly, that now Caleb was toying with the idea of asking Brice what he thought about hiring a ranch manager like the East Ranch employed Shane.
That would free up Caleb and Brice to do what they did best. With Brice traveling all over to buy the horses, and Caleb spending so much time training them, Naomi was trying to pick up the slack while doing some of their office work, but that wasn’t fair to her.
Caleb walked from the barn to the fence to look out over the land. A black-and-white-paint stallion pranced back and forth as he looked into another pasture where the mares were.
Caleb always loved a challenge, and the stallion would certainly be that. The paint was feisty and stubborn. Caleb didn’t want to break him. The last thing he wanted was to take away what made the stallion so beautiful. His approach to training horses was much different than most.
He’d left the stallion alone for the past couple of weeks, only getting close enough to bring him feed each day. The horse wouldn’t let Caleb get within twenty feet of him. Building the trust was the hardest and longest part of the process, but it was one that solidified the next step in the training.
Caleb walked to the gate and let himself in. As soon as the stallion heard the click of the gate latch, his ears swiveled to Caleb.
Caleb chuckled. So far, the mares were more interesting to the horse. Caleb wanted to see how close he could get before the paint looked his way. He’d yet to touch the stallion since releasing him into the pasture.
Halfway to the horse, the animal’s great head swung around. Caleb slowed his steps as he stared into the horse’s dark eyes.
“Easy boy,” Caleb murmured. “You remember me. I know you do because you’re that smart. Besides, I’m the one who brings you food. But I don’t have any now, do I?”
The horse flicked its tail.
Caleb grinned. “You want to know what I’m doing here, don’t you? Well, I think it’s high time you and I got to know each other without food coming between us.”
The stallion pawed the ground with one hoof and snorted.
“Not a fan of that suggestion, huh? Well, too bad, because I’m going to stand my ground. I swore when you got here that I wouldn’t hurt you, and I won’t. Just ask any of t
he other horses here. They’ll tell you.”
The horse grew still, his body twitching only when a gnat landed on him.
Caleb kept his steps slow and held the animal’s gaze. “You know how handsome you are, don’t you? Those mares can’t take their eyes off you. Who knows? You might get cozy with one yet. But not until I give the all-clear. You see, you and I need to be friends first.”
Caleb was about twenty feet from the stallion. This was as close as he’d gotten for weeks. He stopped for just a heartbeat. Then he took another step.
The stallion’s shrill neigh sounded a second before he charged. Caleb held his ground, despite adrenaline pumping through his veins.
Suddenly, the horse slid to a halt and reared, his front hooves pawing at the air. When he landed, he was only two feet away. Caleb knew better than anyone that if the horse had wanted to kill him, he could have. It wouldn’t have mattered if Caleb ran or not.
The stallion blew out a breath and blinked, his sides heaving.
Caleb smiled. “Are we going to be friends now?”
He held out his hand and waited for the horse to sniff it. Once the paint did, Caleb moved closer and rubbed his palm down the animal’s forehead, brushing aside the black and white mane.
“We’re going to be good friends, you and I,” Caleb said. “And we need to come up with a name for you.”
The stallion bobbed his head up and down as if in answer, then spun around and ran off. Caleb was smiling as he watched the animal.
When he turned toward the house, Audrey stood at the fence, her face white.
“You scared the hell out of me,” she stated. “He could have killed you.”
“One of us had to bend. It wasn’t going to be me.”
Just as he wouldn’t bend and give in to the longing within him that he felt for Audrey.
Chapter 20
Audrey hated reckless behavior. Why then did Caleb’s actions excite her?
He walked toward her, never moving his gaze from her face. The closer Caleb got, the faster her breathing came. Her blood ran hot in her veins.
Caleb didn’t go to the gate. He came straight to her. With ease, he climbed the wooden fence and jumped down beside her. He was so close, she could reach out and touch him. Muscles strained his button-down, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows.
With his hat gone, Audrey got to see the thick, light brown locks that he kept trimmed short on the sides and longer on top. He absently shoved the hair that had fallen into his eyes back with a hand. It was such a simple gesture, but it did something strange to her. She swallowed hard, her body achy and … needy.
“I’m going to take a shower.”
Audrey blinked, taken aback by his words. Of all the things she hoped he might say, of all the things she thought he could’ve said, that wasn’t one of them.
“Oh. Okay,” she mumbled.
He gave her a nod. “Stay out here as long as you like.”
Then, he was gone. Audrey felt like such an idiot. At least she hadn’t said or done anything to let him know that she was attracted to him.
She snorted loudly. “Attracted, my ass. I want to climb his hot body, licking my way over his skin as I go,” she said to herself.
It had been a long time since she’d been so wrong about a man before. Was it because she had nearly worked herself to death over the past few days? Or was it because she was around someone so damn gorgeous and kind and generous?
Abby turned to the fence and rested her arms on it before she placed her forehead against the top rail. It was all her sister’s and Naomi’s fault. If they hadn’t said anything about Caleb, she wouldn’t be feeling these … things.
Liar.
She really hated her conscience sometimes. Especially when it was right. And this time, it was dead on.
It was a wonder that Caleb hadn’t already been snatched up by some lucky woman. He was a catch for sure. Not because of his connection to the East Ranch, but because of all his other amazing qualities.
Audrey lifted her head and looked at the paint stallion. He was an utterly magnificent animal. One that she wouldn’t be able to part with. The way he held his head as if he knew that he was special was something to see. The stallion pranced and neighed, showing off to the mares. And they responded with an answering neigh.
Several of the horses ran to the fence to greet the stallion, touching noses and sniffing each other. Thankfully, none of the mares were in heat. Otherwise, the paint might break through the fence to get to them.
That’s what Audrey wanted. A man who would break through fences or anything else that stood in his way to get to her. She had yet to encounter anyone like that.
Her thoughts immediately went to Caleb. He would do that for the woman he wanted. He wouldn’t let anything or anyone prevent him from getting to the one he loved.
And for just a split second, Audrey allowed herself to wonder how that might feel if she were the one Caleb desired.
It was such a heady sensation that she had to stop the thoughts before they went on too long. Audrey knew better than to allow herself to drift into fantasies. Because real life never measured up.
She’d learned that the hard way. All the wonderful fairy tales her parents had told her as a child had made her into quite the romantic. She dreamed—as most little girls did—of a man coming to her rescue and sweeping her off her feet.
He didn’t have to be a knight. She wasn’t picky. But she’d fully expected something like that to happen to her. Besides, every story had a grain of truth in it.
Then she started dating. In all fairness, she didn’t expect much from the boys in high school. They were boys, after all.
Her romantic nature had led her straight to romance novels. And all her dreams multiplied a hundredfold. She was the heroine in every book be it medieval, a woman in WWII, or a story set in modern day, the future, or even something of fantasy.
She’d learned to flirt and kiss in high school, which she knew had prepared her for the future. So, her attention was fixated on college. She’d known it would happen then.
Every day she woke with a bright smile, waiting for the man/prince/knight/warrior from the fairy tales and romance books. Maddy used to tell her that the books were ruining her for real life.
But when did she stop looking for her man? When did she stop expecting love to find her? For the life of her, Audrey couldn’t figure it out. She still considered herself a romantic, but why then had she shunned relationships?
It wasn’t because of her parents. She’d had a wonderful life as a child and still did as an adult. The tragedy that’d struck her family was just that. A tragedy. Others dealt with such things all the time.
That’s not what made her keep men at arm’s-length, though.
So, what was it? Did she get tired of waiting? Or was it that the men she encountered were nothing like what she was looking for? She’d given quite a few a fighting chance, but each of them was lacking in some way. No one ever measured up.
An image of Caleb filled her mind.
He could. Audrey had recognized that from the first moment she saw him.
But she was so used to being on her own, making her own decisions and doing whatever she wanted, that she now worried she would never be able to make room for anyone else in her life.
She looked over her shoulder toward the house. The sun made it impossible to see in the windows and tell where Caleb was. She’d just been with him for a few hours and was already tied in knots. The rest of the day and night were still ahead.
Maybe she should return to the auction house. It was safer there.
You don’t want safe. You want him.
She squeezed her eyes closed and faced forward. God help her, but she did. She wanted to feel Caleb’s arms around her, to have him pull her against his hard chest and hold her tightly as he slowly lowered his face to hers and kissed her.
Then she wanted him to yank off her clothes and—
“No,” she said a
loud.
She wouldn’t go down that road. That would be too much to bear and make finding any kind of sleep impossible. She was already hot from being around Caleb. Letting her imagination go to how it might be with them together would keep her tossing and turning all night with desire.
Audrey shoved her hair to one side and tried to turn her thoughts to something else. If she had her phone, she would have checked in with her sister, but her cell was in the house, and she didn’t want to go back in yet.
She walked along the fence toward the stables, then veered inside to take a look at the horses within. Audrey wasn’t surprised to see that it was a state-of-the-art building with an A-frame ceiling to give plenty of airflow.
As she made her way through, she noticed the small lights that shed just enough glow so as not to be harsh. Added to the skylights spaced every twenty feet, it lightened the inside just enough. There were twenty large stalls. Along with a feed room, and a tack room, she was also surprised to find an on-site veterinarian clinic, outfitted with everything.
Audrey paused to pet a black horse who stuck her head out. She spotted a brush and grabbed it before opening the door and giving the mare a little push to back her up. The animal immediately took several steps back and blinked at Audrey with dark eyes.
“You are quite beautiful, but you know that, don’t you?” Audrey said as she let the horse sniff her.
Then she began brushing the animal, starting at the neck and working her way down to the shoulders and across the mare’s back. Though Audrey expected nothing less, it was obvious that the horses at the Rockin’ H Ranch were well cared for.
Once Audrey had finished brushing the horse, she gave the mare a light pat and ducked under her head to leave. There was something about spending even a little time with a horse that settled Audrey.
Her mind was no longer jumbled. She had a smile on her face as she walked back to the house and entered. No sooner had she come through the door than she caught a glimpse of a shirtless Caleb as he walked from the laundry room.