Lucidity

by CJ Lyons

  She turned and the lights were extinguished, the door shut, leaving her shrouded in darkness. But nothing could hide her from his eyes, not now that he knew where to look.

  She had come for him, to rescue him. God, what she must think? Did she curse his name for abandoning her these long, four years? Yet, still she came, searching. For him. Her one true love. Her forever love.

  "I didn't want to," he shouted, pounding on the glass in a futile effort to get her attention. "It wasn't my choice! They tricked me, they took you from me! Grace!"

  She turned to face him and for one brief moment his entire being was filled with the ecstasy of her love.

  Blue bolts of lightning began to shower her, a curtain shielding her from his eyes. There was no rain, no thunder, even the wind had died.

  Yet it was as if the heavens above were lashing out, determined to stop her from seeing him. He called out her name, his shouts echoing through the small room, rattling the glass, pounding through his bones.

  As quickly as it began, the lightning storm ended. Grace stood there, whole, somehow untouched by the heavenly wrath. But she was no longer alone.

  Lukas' scream died before he could give it voice. His throat clenched tight with terror. He was back, returned from Hell itself. The Devil reborn.

  He watched in horror as the demonspawn that was Jimmy Moran took Grace into his arms, holding her captive in an embrace that threatened to choke the life from her.

  Cold spiraled through the glass into the silver platinum of his wedding band, racing into his very soul. Grace had risked herself to come to his aid, but now it was up to Lukas to save her from Moran.

  Again.

  CHAPTER 20

  Dance with the Devil

  On the dark rooftop of the helipad, the rain had stopped. Clouds parted as if by an unseen hand. Grace shivered, the thin cotton scrubs she wore no match against the March Pittsburgh night. Today was the first day of spring, but winter didn't seem willing to surrender.

  "Do you remember?" Jimmy repeated. "That night? Our first night?"

  She remembered. It was the first time in her life she had believed in magic, in the unknown, in hope.

  On that ancient hilltop, surrounded by sacred stones that sang, caressed by his strong arms, she had dared to believe.

  "There was a meteor shower," she said. "A thousand falling stars. I felt dizzy like I was falling with them, I didn't know which way was up."

  She craned her head to look at him, reached a finger to trace his strong jaw line. A shiver swept through her. To be able to touch him again, after all this time. The illusion was marred only by the sight of the Tower shimmering through his transparent form. Why couldn't her imagination fix that?

  "I remember falling and you catching me," she finished.

  "Then look, Grace." He turned her so that she was snugged against his chest, his arms wrapped around her, both facing west. The sun was now hidden by the Tower, but reflections of its golden glow could be spied in the clouds above. Then the wind scudded the few last wisps of clouds aside, revealing an indigo twilight sky. "Watch, Grace. Do you see them?"

  She did. Falling stars, shooting through the night above the Pittsburgh skyline. "Yes," she whispered.

  "Make a wish, Grace. Wish hard, for what's most important. Wish carefully. Wish for what you want most in the world."

  She understood now why her diseased mind had brought her here--hadn't she imagined this rooftop as her last resort when she found herself trapped in this hell on earth? Grace squeezed her eyes shut. Jimmy's arms tightened around her chest.

  This should be easy, she'd been wishing for the same thing ever since she woke during the brain biopsy. To go home and die, to be with Jimmy again, to finally leave this world that no longer held any light or joy or magic.

  But now as she tried to form the thought, she saw Alex and Kat. Their laughter rang through her mind. She thought of what they'd suffered in their short lives, what they still faced. She wished that they could experience the love and joy she'd been blessed with, that they would find the strength and courage to face what was to come, that they wouldn't have to face their future alone.

  "You wished well," Jimmy said, his breath caressing the side of her neck. "Open your eyes."

  She did. Overhead, the meteors continued their dance across the sky, shimmering faintly against the city lights. "Just like that first night," she whispered into the darkness.

  "A thousand and one stars. I wished on every blessed one," Jimmy said. "Do you know what I wished for back then?"

  "No." She lied. She had a very good idea what he wished for, it haunted her to this day. "Don't tell me, don't say it," she begged.

  She squeezed her eyes shut against the tears that threatened to spill out. He turned her within his embrace, tilted her chin up, smoothed away her tears with a callused fingertip.

  "I wished to spend the rest of my life with you, Grace." His lips caressed her forehead. Grace kept her eyes shut tight, suddenly terrified of what she might see if she opened them.

  "Open your eyes, Grace," he commanded. "Open them."

  Curiosity trumped her misgivings. She opened her eyes. Jimmy stood before her, reaching to take her hands in his. As he raised her left hand to his lips the faint glow of gold from her rings was swallowed by his shadow.

  He stood before her, his body whole, undamaged, solid. He threw his head back, his laughter splitting the air. Then he snagged her by the waist and raised her up high, spinning her around the abandoned rooftop.

  "You did it, love. You did it!"

  Jimmy felt like howling at the moon. So he did. A triumphant, gleeful howl that exploded into the air. The howl of a beast, a creature of the night, a being of sheer power.

  Except that he was none of those--and all of them. Rain cascaded down on him, chilling his naked flesh. The goose bumps rising on his bare skin made him laugh, a brittle noise that sounded hollow to his ears. His ears! He could hear himself! He sucked in a deep breath and tried once more.

  This time the sound was a bit closer to how he remembered laughter, but still tinny, like the soundtrack from a B-horror flick. Grace must have felt the same, because she was clawing at him, trying to push free of his embrace.

  As if he'd ever let her go! Not now, after coming so very far to hold her again. The cold night air was intoxicating, as was the scent of the woman in his arms. He whipped her around once more, spinning so hard and fast that he began to feel dizzy. Dizzy--he'd totally forgotten what it felt like to have your head rushing past your body like that!

  "Jimmy, please!" Grace's voice finally broke through his exultation.

  He stopped, swayed a moment and steadied himself, still holding her tight. She looked up at him, her eyes wide with fear. He sniffed and realized he could smell her fear as well, washing off her in waves, caressing his nostrils with a primitive surge of power.

  Grace was afraid. Of him.

  The thought should have brought him to his senses, but instead her fear was as overwhelming as the knowledge that he was alive once more. Power, far greater than he'd ever held in his previous life, surged through him. Accompanying it was desire, lust, primal passion. The knowledge that the woman in his arms was his and his alone.

  He crushed her mouth beneath his, barely noticing her fists glancing off his bare chest and back. He tasted her, feasted on her, inhaled her, embraced her and knew her.

  Their eyes met and slowly, so slowly, she relaxed in his grasp. The fear fled from her eyes, replaced by wonder and awe.

  Her body trembled against his and a small noise of amazement caught in her throat as she relinquished herself to him.

  Cradling her in his arms, he strode through puddles and carried her out of the night chill and back into the Annex. Ahh, the tender joy of caring for another. How well he remembered that.

  His bare feet slapped against the cold linoleum, sending shivers of delight up his spine. Every molecule of air that brushed against him, every mote of dust disturbed by his pas
sing, every small exhalation of her breath on his skin, shimmered over and into him so that each sensation became precious and vital.

  "Say my name again," he commanded as he pushed through the door leading to the abandoned call rooms.

  She met his gaze head on, no fear in her eyes now. "Jimmy."

  Her voice lanced into him, striking with such intensity that he was instantly and totally aroused. He couldn't wait until they reached the call room or her bed. He pinned her against the wall, tugging at the soaked, thin cotton that clung to her body like a second skin.

  "Aw, love," his voice emerged a ragged whisper as he skimmed his lips over her face, memorizing every inch, every nuance. "My Grace. I missed you so."

  She pushed his fumbling hands away long enough to kick free of her pants, then she stroked one foot up the back of his calf, higher, her touch like lightning searing into him. His mouth closed on her breast, layers of fabric still between them, but he felt her arousal as his tongue stroked over her nipple. He shifted his hands to cup her bottom and raised her hips to meet his.

  "Say it again," he begged as he slid into her heat. Her muscles clenched around him, pulling him in deeper, inviting him home.

  "Jimmy!" She cried out his name, repeating it over and over as he thrust into her, until her cries and the echoes of his own collided. Her head arched back, slamming against the tile wall with a crack as the climax shuddered through her.

  Jimmy felt his seed pour into her and couldn't stop the tears streaming down his face, slipping onto her cheek as she clung to him, shaking. He slumped against the wall, would have dropped her if she hadn't lowered her feet back to the ground.

  Together they stood, broken, bowed, and united.

  The only sound Jimmy could hear in the empty, deserted hallway was the thump of her heart as it pulsed against his flesh.

  This, this was what he had returned for.

  "Ar gra buana brach. Our love lives forever."

  Alex couldn't remember a time when he was happier. Tonight was better than even last year when the nurses invited a real magician to come to the ward on his birthday. The Great Leonardo. He was the one who had taught Alex the fortune telling trick that had gone so very wrong earlier today. After the excitement of the party, Alex's lungs had gone all spastic and he'd spiked a fever. Despite the five days in the ICU that followed, that was the best day of his life.

  Until tonight. Tonight he was going to have a real sleepover like a real kid with a real family. The girls brought popcorn and a video, Star Wars, one of Alex's favorites, to keep him company until Grace and Vincent arrived. He watched the movie, hoping Grace would find a way to sneak Kat out of the Tower as well.

  Then everything really would be perfect.

  "The biggest mistake of my life," Renee Redding said as Eve closed the door to her office, ensuring their privacy, "was leaving my son with his father. But the only reason Earl married me was to give his parents an heir, someone to carry on the Redding name. I thought he wanted Lukas so much that he would love him, take care of him."

  Eve watched as the meticulously groomed older woman sagged a bit with memory and slid into the chair across from her desk.

  "I was wrong," Renee admitted. She slanted her gaze up to meet Eve's, her back straight once more, knees together. "I will not abandon my son again."

  Eve bought herself a moment by hanging up her lab coat before taking her own chair behind the large, blond oak desk. When she spoke, it was with her best clinical tone, the one designed to break bad news to family without them blaming the messenger.

  "Mrs. Redding, I'm truly sorry that I haven't been able to help your son more than I have. But we knew from the beginning that this was a very difficult case and that the chances of success were slim."

  Renee didn't react at all the way Eve expected. She was prepared for tearful arguing, a tirade decrying Eve's clinical skills, a protest of her son's innocence. But not for the shrewd narrowing of the older woman's eyes or the gleam of triumph that was reflected in them.

  "You're not giving up on my son, Dr. Warden," Renee told her--no, not told, ordered. "That's not you, the woman who dug herself out of a Coinjock, North Carolina trailer park and vowed never to return, leaving behind daddy-dearest with the quick fists and her mother the human punching bag. Not to mention the four younger brothers and sisters that you were expected to raise and shelter."

  Eve looked up, keeping her face placid as her nails bit into her palms out of sight beneath the desktop. "You don't know anything about me."

  Renee rose to stand regal and tall over the desk. "Surely you didn't think I'd entrust my son, much less something as important as the Lucidine Project, to you without checking your background? Besides, your tidewater twang comes out when you're upset or excited. You really should watch that, dear."

  "Where I come from has nothing to do with the Lucidine Project or your son."

  "Maybe, maybe not. How about the fact that you stole the formula for Lucidine from your former lover during your neuro-anesthesia fellowship? Or the fact that that same lover shot himself with your gun after you left him--in remorse, no doubt."

  Eve forced her anger down and lowered her eyes, blinking hard. "Tom's death almost killed me. How dare you drag him into this!"

  As she spoke, choking back imaginary tears, her hand inched over to the desk drawer containing her Smith and Wesson .38. One thing about country girls, they learned early the value of a good gun and knowing how to use it.

  "Stop the theatrics. We're both women of the world here. You know as well as I that Tom Wilson didn't kill himself. That's all right, I've done as bad or worse myself. I admire you, Eve. We're a lot alike. And if you do what I say, we'll both get what we want: my son healthy, the Lucidine Project up and running, and with both of those, we'll control of every important piece of legislation coming out of Washington."

  Eve remained silent, uncertain if she should show her hand or bluff. The diamond edged hardness in Renee's voice convinced her of the folly of further dissembling. Renee wanted to use Lucidine for her own ends, but if it got Eve what she wanted....

  "What did you have in mind?"

  Renee pursed her lips into a satisfied smile. She edged her chair closer and sat back down. "You originally said that if you had the Moran woman you could use her to convince Lukas that she really was dead, bring him closure so that the new memories you gave him would overshadow his real ones."

  "Yes. But that was before he suspected that she was still alive. And I don't have Grace Moran, remember?"

  "Surely someone is looking for her? I mean, a crazy, sick, dying woman disappearing from the hospital--"

  Eve nodded. "Helman told me he has Vincent Emberek searching for her."

  "The man you want to work with you on the Lucidine Project? Perfect. He has as much to lose as we do."

  "Not quite. He's not exactly on board with the Project. Yet."

  Renee arched an eyebrow at that. "He's a man, isn't he? However you do it, you need to get him working for us. Before it's too late."

  "Even if Vincent finds her, we don't have much time," Eve argued. "With Lukas building resistance to the idea that Moran is dead, it will take more intensive therapy to overcome that. I'll need to sedate him for a while before he'll be receptive enough that I can even start."

  "It will work," Renee said with confidence. "Especially if you can show him Moran's dead body. But you need to move fast. I can't stand to see Lukas in such turmoil."

  Her voice softened at the mention of her son and Eve was surprised, again, by the intensity of the other woman's devotion to her warped and damaged child.

  Renee Redding truly did regret the choice she had made that left her son in the company of a sociopath like Earl Redding. She had devoted all her energy and considerable resources to giving Lukas every opportunity to live the life Earl had stolen from him.

  Even if that meant sacrificing Grace Moran's life to achieve that.

  Eve stared at the other woman long and har
d, weighing the risks to herself and her project if she did as Renee suggested. Before she could say anything, there was a quick knock on the door and Vincent entered.

  "Hi," he said with a bright smile as if he hadn't a care in the world. "Is this a bad time? I thought we could have dinner and talk more about your Lucidine clinic." His gaze caught Renee and he paused. "I'm sorry. I can come back--"

  "Oh no," Renee said with a wide smile that revealed her gleaming white teeth. She stood and turned to Vincent, taking his hand and holding it for a moment too long. "Lucidine has saved my son," she gushed. "I wouldn't dream of keeping you two from your work."

  Eve stood as well, bristling as the older woman clung to Vincent's arm. Laying it on too thick. But Vincent didn't seem to notice, instead he beamed down at Renee. "Lucidine helped your son?"

  "Oh yes," Renee said. "Dr. Warden is a genius. The world will be a different place once more people have access to the Lucidine treatment program." She turned to Eve. "Thank you again, Dr. Warden. I don't know what we would have done without you. I'd best go. I know your time is precious."

  Then, with a knowing arch of an eyebrow at Eve, Renee left.

  Eve knew what she had to do. She glided from behind her desk to stand in front of Vincent, arching her back slightly and noting with satisfaction the way his gaze drifted to her breasts. "You look pleased with yourself," she said. "Did you find Grace Moran?"

  "I know where she'll be in the morning."

  She guided him to the seat Renee had just vacated and set herself to pouring coffee for him, her plan crystallizing. They'd have dinner and after, she'd dose his coffee with some rohypnol. Just enough to make him complacent and to ensure amnesia if events took a turn the wrong way. She wasn't taking any chances, not with her dream so close.

  "That's great," she said, handing him his coffee, two creams, just the way he liked it. "If I start the brain mapping in the morning, it will give me just enough time to prepare her for surgery before it's too late."