All She Needs to Know

by Maria Siano

  "I didn’t know Drew asked you to come back to the Observer." Noelle moved the menu to the edge of the table. "That’s great!"

  "I probably should just go back to my old job," Summer admitted. "And I know it should be easy to walk away from Kyle, if for no other reason than to protect myself from getting hurt by him again."

  Noelle leaned forward. "So why do you think you’re even considering Kyle’s job offer?"

  Before Summer could answer, the waiter approached and took their salad orders.

  As the waiter scurried away, Noelle leaned in again. "I mean, I hate the thought of you putting yourself in a situation where Kyle could hurt you again. I’m afraid if you trust him, he’ll betray your trust."

  "But I miss him," Summer confessed. "I didn’t realize how much, until today." She blinked back a tear. "It feels like no matter what I do, I’m not going to be happy. If I work with him, I’ll always feel like a doormat for forgiving him. I know people will think I’m letting him get away with what he did. No one will understand. But if I never see him again, I’ll always wonder what might’ve been."

  Noelle’s eyebrow lifted. "So this doesn’t only have to do with work? Are you hoping to get back together with him?"

  Summer didn’t want to admit it to Noelle, or even herself. But a part of her did hope they could get back together, pick up where they left off. Crazy as that sounded, even to her. "I don’t —"

  "— know." Noelle pressed her lips together in a pout. "Since you’re having such a hard time making this decision, have you considered talking to a therapist?"

  "I’m not sure —"

  "I never talked about it at the time..." Noelle lowered her voice. "But, last year, Tim and I started to grow apart, and we didn’t want it to ruin our marriage. We went to a therapist, and she really helped us. I can give you her name."

  "Uhhh." Summer paused. She didn’t want to offend Noelle by telling her but she’d never go to a therapist.

  "I’ll text you the information." Noelle reached into her purse and pulled out her phone.

  CHAPTER 13

  Kyle stopped his car next to the speaker and ordered an egg and cheese sandwich. Then he drove to the next window. As he sat waiting for his breakfast order, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed Patrick Sheridan’s number. He took a deep breath. Ring. Before his appointment with Dr. Cohen on Friday, he needed to make amends with the people he’d hurt in his quest to regain his acting career. Ring. He hoped his job offer to Summer showed her his intention to make things right. But she still hadn’t given him an answer yet. Ring. While he waited for word from Summer, he needed to try to resolve things with Patrick, too.

  "Hello," Patrick answered.

  "Mr. Sheridan?" Kyle took a deep breath. "This is Kyle Mills."

  "Yes," Patrick said.

  "I’d like to meet with you, Mr. Sheridan. There are some things I wanted to discuss. Would you be able to meet me at the Park View Diner this afternoon?"

  "I’ll meet you there at noon," Patrick said. "There are some things I’ve been wanting to discuss with you, too."

  Kyle’s chest tightened. "Great. See you then, Mr. Sheridan."

  Kyle ended the call and put the phone on the passenger seat next to him.

  What could Patrick want to speak to me about?

  ***

  Summer sat in a chair next to the front door of the therapist’s otherwise empty waiting room and started to fill out the requisite paperwork. She had never planned on using Noelle’s referral, but after too many sleepless nights, she decided to make the appointment after all.

  Summer completed the last line on the form just as a woman in her mid-fifties emerged from the inner office holding a lined yellow notepad.

  The woman approached and extended her hand. "Hello, Summer. I’m Nina Wilson. Nice to meet you. Please come in."

  Summer stood and shook Dr. Wilson’s hand. Then she followed her into the office.

  Dr. Wilson motioned for Summer to sit in one of the wing-back chairs at the far end of the room near the window.

  "I’ve never been to a therapist before," Summer blurted out as she sat.

  The therapist took a few steps and sat in the chair a few feet away, on the other side of the coffee table. "What can I help you with?" the doctor asked.

  The frank question startled Summer. Were they just supposed to get right to the problem, so quickly? "I have to make a decision about something." She hesitated. "And I’ve been having a difficult time. I thought it might help to talk to someone."

  Dr. Wilson grabbed a pen from the cup holder on the coffee table and began to scrawl notes in her pad as Summer explained about her work as a journalist, her relationship with Kyle, and how he lied to her.

  "After he lied, I knew it wouldn’t be possible to have any kind of personal relationship with him." Summer glanced across at the doctor’s notepad. The doctor had hardly uttered a word since they sat down, and it unsettled her to have all of her thoughts recorded. When I interview people about very personal issues, is this how they feel? "Is this OK?" Summer asked. "Am I talking too much? Is this what I’m supposed to do?"

  Dr. Wilson lifted her head out of her notepad. "There’s no right or wrong way to conduct these sessions. We can talk about anything you’d like."

  "OK, so..." Summer paused and drew in a breath. "So, I didn’t think I could have any type of relationship with him at all. Even though at first I tried to understand why he lied to me."

  Dr. Wilson lifted her head. "I see."

  I see. Summer seethed. No words of wisdom? No sound advice?

  She knew the appointment would turn out to be a waste of time.

  But she fought the urge to leave and forced herself to continue. "I told myself Kyle had gone through a frightening experience. He battled and survived Hodgkin’s, and he was also trying to revive his Hollywood career. But I still couldn’t get past the fact that he lied to me."

  "Mmhmm." Dr. Wilson scribbled across the page, her head still buried in her notepad.

  "Well, so, now there’s a possibility to have Kyle back in my life," Summer explained. "He offered me a job as the public relations director for his Hodgkin’s research foundation. And I don’t know what to do. The foundation work is something I would like to do. As a reporter, I’ve written so many articles about people’s health struggles and it always felt good to know I was advocating for them, in a way. And I’d like to be able to continue to do that."

  "I see," the doctor said.

  "But...I...I think I might be in love with him." Summer sighed.

  "And you feel that’s a problem?" Dr. Wilson asked, still staring into her notepad.

  Summer rubbed her eyebrow. "I feel like I shouldn’t forgive him, after what he did. And if I start working with him, I don’t think I’ll be able to deny my feelings for him."

  Dr. Wilson reviewed the notes on her pad. "So, it seems you’re trying to decide if you want Kyle to be a part of your life again?"

  "That’s right," Summer confirmed. "I know I still have feelings for him. And the more I see him, the more intense my feelings become."

  "And you don’t want to have these feelings for him?" The doctor tilted her head.

  "I don’t know." Summer exhaled. "I don’t know what I want. I think I love him, but I don’t know if I want to love him." She sighed. "How do people make these decisions?" she whispered. "No matter what I do, I’ll be unhappy. If I keep working with him, I’ll see myself through other people’s eyes. I’ll feel weak for being with him. But if I don’t work with him, I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop thinking about him. There is no good answer."

  The doctor placed her notepad on the coffee table. "No one can say what would be the right decision. You have to figure out the right decision for you."

  Summer frowned. "I know Kyle is sincerely sorry for lying to me. I’ve
never doubted it. I just don’t know if I can fully forgive him for what he did. Especially because he let the lie become public. If he admitted the truth before the article was published, maybe things would have been different."

  Dr. Wilson tilted her head. "Does it bother you more that the lie was public, or that he lied to you at all?"

  "I guess it does bother me more because it was so public," Summer admitted. "I got fired because of it. It ruined my career. And now if I go back to him, I know everyone will have an opinion about it. I mean, everything Kyle does gets so much attention, especially now with him in the spotlight again as his acting career is rebounding. It’s not as if we could ever have this quiet, private life together somewhere. Everything he does is covered on TMZ or Access Hollywood now. And if I’m with him, then everything I do will be public, too. When I got fired, it was a very public story, because it involved him."

  "Mmmhhmmmm," Dr. Wilson muttered as she picked up her notepad from the coffee table. She flipped through the pages. "From everything you’ve said, it appears you have forgiven Kyle. And you even seem to understand why he lied, but you don’t think others will understand why you have forgiven him."

  Summer nodded. "That’s right. And I don’t want to let what other people think of me ruin what could be a second chance with Kyle. But there is one other thing... There’s something I’ve been keeping from Kyle... for a while..."

  "Oh..." The doctor flipped to a blank page in her notepad and held her pen.

  "He told me about his cousin in confidence," Summer exhaled. "And I blurted it out to my editor, Drew. I didn’t mean to. It just sort of came out. And once Drew knew, the story was going to be published whether Kyle was involved in the article or not. But Kyle doesn’t know any of that. Because I never told him."

  Dr. Wilson scribbled something at the top corner of the page. Then she glanced at Summer. "Why do you think you haven’t told Kyle?"

  Summer closed her eyes. "I didn’t mean to reveal the information to my editor. I didn’t mean for any of it to happen."

  "Sounds a bit like what happened when Kyle lied to you," Dr. Wilson said.

  Summer’s eyes popped open.

  "It sounds like Kyle didn’t intend to hurt you," the doctor continued. "Just like you didn’t intend to hurt Kyle by telling Drew the information about Kyle’s cousin."

  "Yes. That’s right," Summer confirmed. "But Kyle’s apologized for what he did," she whispered. "He’s apologized to me. And he’s apologized publicly."

  "It seems you understand just how difficult it was for Kyle to tell you the truth, to admit he lied to you," Dr. Wilson said. "And you seem to understand why he lied to you."

  "I think I do." Summer exhaled. "I know I do."

  Summer glimpsed the clock on the wall. We’ve been talking for an hour. Already? She stood. "Thank you, Dr. Wilson." She extended her hand to the therapist. "This has been a huge help."

  CHAPTER 14

  Summer pulled into a parking spot in front of the Kyle Mills Hodgkin’s Research Foundation. She shut off the engine and reached into her open purse on the passenger seat. She grabbed the phone and swiped the screen. She hadn’t checked her messages all morning, since her appointment with Dr. Wilson.

  A voicemail message? Unable to place the number on the caller ID, Summer searched for the caller’s name, but no name popped up. But the location was familiar: White Plains, New York. Summer punched in her voicemail password.

  "Summer, this is a little bit of a blast from your past."

  Summer smiled as the voice filled the car.

  "It’s Robyn Finley. I wanted to see if you might be available for a news editor job we have open here at the News."

  Summer gasped.

  "It’s the job I always envisioned you would step into one day," Robyn continued. "If you’re available, and interested, give me a call."

  Summer clutched the phone. She had always planned to stay in touch with Robyn, and the rest of the News staff, after she left New York. Hearing Robyn’s voice again, she regretted not keeping in touch.

  She pulled up Robyn’s number on the caller ID and redialed. Ring...Ring... Summer’s heart beat faster. Ring...

  "Summer!" Robyn bellowed. "Thanks for calling back."

  "I was glad to get your message, Robyn, and I’m sorry I haven’t been in touch—"

  "Well, I know it’s been a challenging year for you," Robyn whispered.

  "Yes, I..." Summer didn’t know if Robyn was referring to the loss of her mother, or the public humiliation of getting fired. Or both.

  "Listen," Robyn continued. "I wanted to see if you might be ready to move back to the East Coast. I’ve been following your work there in Wisconsin, and I’ve been very impressed, especially with your weekly health series. I know you had a little misstep with the Kyle Mills story, but after he appeared on Jayne Norris’s show, it all made sense. And I’m sure you learned a lesson from it."

  "I certainly did," Summer answered. "I still don’t know how I let myself get caught up in everything."

  "Well, those personal stories are the hardest to fact-check," Robyn confirmed in her familiar quick pace.

  "Yes, but Kyle didn’t—" Summer was about to defend Kyle. Again. And she needed to stop doing that. She took a breath. "I’ve made mistakes as a journalist. But I won’t make those mistakes again."

  "That’s what I wanted to hear," Robyn confirmed. "So, why don’t you come to New York so we can discuss the job some more. Everyone in the newsroom would love to see you again."

  Summer’s mind reeled. "Can I get back to you in few days? This is all unexpected, and a lot to think about."

  "Sure," Robyn said. "But let me know either way by Friday."

  "I will," Summer agreed. "Thanks so much, Robyn. It’s great to talk to you again." Summer ended the call and dropped the phone into her open bag.

  After meeting with Dr. Wilson that morning, she was certain of what she needed to do. Stay in Spring Valley. Pursue a new career path in public relations. Work for Kyle.

  And even, possibly, give her relationship with him another chance.

  But now.

  She had a chance to return to her life in New York. Pick up where she left things a year ago.

  It would almost be as if the last year never happened. She could erase all the misery.

  Summer put the key into the ignition. As the engine purred, she shifted into reverse.

  ***

  Kyle rushed over to the counter and stood next to Patrick Sheridan. He took a deep breath as he extended his hand. "Mr. Sheridan."

  Patrick didn’t make eye contact but shook Kyle’s hand. "I’m glad you called this morning." Patrick sipped his coffee as he watched the waitresses going in and out of the swinging kitchen door behind the counter.

  Kyle sat on the stool next to Patrick. "Thanks so much for meeting me. I wasn’t sure —"

  "Coffee?" Patrick pointed to his mug.

  Kyle nodded. "That’d be great."

  Patrick waved to a passing waitress and lifted his coffee cup.

  The waitress grabbed the coffee pot from the ledge behind her and marched over. She filled Patrick’s cup.

  "Can we get another cup for this guy?" Patrick asked her as he pointed his thumb toward Kyle.

  The waitress reached back and grabbed an empty mug from the shelf behind her.

  Kyle turned toward Patrick. "So, Mr. Sheridan, I wanted to —"

  Patrick held up his hand. "First, call me Patrick."

  "OK. Patrick —"

  "Kyle, let me start by saying I’m sorry for everything that happened at the memorial service." Patrick’s eyes were fixed on the waitress as she talked to a nearby diner out of earshot.

  "No need to apologize, Patrick —"

  "But I do need to apologize." Patrick swiveled on the stool and his eyes met Kyle’s. "The
way I treated you was unfair. It was a difficult time for me —"

  "I understand. Really." Kyle grabbed a handful of sugar packets from the small container sitting on the edge of the counter. "It’s not necessary to explain." As he emptied two packets into his coffee mug, he glanced over at Patrick.

  Patrick stared at the kitchen door. "I’m very grateful for what you did for Faith. Your friendship meant a lot to her. She was very happy during the last few weeks of her life, happier than she had been in months."

  "That’s one of the things —"

  "And I never properly thanked you for your very generous donation," Patrick interrupted. "At the time, I was ashamed to need financial help from anyone. The night of the memorial service, when I found out about your donation, it wounded my pride — to admit I needed help from some Hollywood actor —"

  "My intention was only to help —" Kyle whispered.

  "It did help," Patrick confirmed. "More than you know. We paid off all of our debts, and I’ve even been able to start my own construction business. Things have been real good this year, and we’re back on our feet."

  "I’m so glad to hear that." Kyle tugged at his fingers. "I have to tell you, Faith was a real inspiration to me, and she helped me realize some things that I hadn’t wanted to deal with myself —"

  "Yeah, I saw a report on the news about you." Patrick’s eyebrow rose. "I was pretty knocked out when I heard you’d battled Hodgkin’s, too. I realized I had completely misjudged you."

  Kyle sipped his coffee. "It’s never been easy for me to talk about my diagnosis. But that’s one of the things about Faith I really admired." He turned toward Patrick. "She wanted to share her experiences, to help other people. It made me see, I could’ve helped a lot of people if I had been more open about what I went through."

  Patrick placed his hand on Kyle’s back.

  The fatherly gesture reassured Kyle.

  Patrick cleared his throat. "I know Faith would be over the moon if she could hear you say she helped you in some way. She was dazzled by you."

  Kyle pushed the coffee mug away. "I have this idea. With your permission, and only if you agree, I would like to write a play about Faith’s life."