Broken Wings

by Weis, Alexandrea

  “Your fiancée could have a compromised vascular system, making it harder for her heart to pump the extra blood and fluid a pregnancy can introduce into the body. We already know her kidneys are not functioning as well as I would like for someone about to embark on a pregnancy. We can control her blood pressure with medication that won’t affect the baby in any way.” He turned to Pamela. “You need to be aware, Pamela, that my goal for this pregnancy is to get you to eight months with as few problems as possible. At that time, we’ll take the baby via c-section. I don’t think going to full term for a woman in your condition is advisable. You also need to be prepared to spend part of this pregnancy in bed, if necessary.”

  “I’m in the process of hiring someone to take over my facility. I rehab wildlife,” she explained. “I have applicants coming in this afternoon, in fact, to interview for the position.”

  Dr. Holdford nodded. “Your fiancé told me about what you do, and I have to agree with him that you need to have as little contact with wildlife as possible now. If you were to get an infection from a scratch or bite it could prove deadly to the baby.”

  “And she’s going to be moving in with me,” Bob disclosed. “I want her in the city and close to you and the local hospitals.”

  “Glad to hear it.” Dr. Holdford closed the chart in his hands. “I know that both of you are aware that this could be a difficult pregnancy, and you need to be prepared. As time goes on and the baby grows, Pamela, your level of fatigue will increase. And that fatigue could continue until well after the baby is born, so you will need to make plans for additional assistance in caring for the child. I have had several lupus patients, and they usually report increased joint pain during, and after, their pregnancy. But every woman is different and your complaints may not be the same as theirs, so we will deal with issues as they come up.” He stood from his stool. “So let’s take a look at you and see where we are.”

  When Dr. Holdford waved Pamela up onto the exam table, the color drained from Bob’s face.

  “Bob, why don’t you go back into the waiting room?” Pamela suggested as she stood from her chair.

  Bob just nodded and bolted for the door.

  Dr. Holdford watched as Bob shut the exam room door closed behind him. “Is he okay?” he asked.

  “He has a phobia about doctors and hospitals. I’m surprised he lasted this long,” she admitted.

  Dr. Holdford gave her a worried glance. “And what do you think he will do in the delivery room?”

  Pamela shook her head, already knowing the answer to that question. “I’m sure he won’t be in the delivery room, Dr. Holdford,” she told him.

  “Is he going to be able to help you through this, Pamela?” he asked, looking even more troubled.

  “I’ve got no one else. Bob’s all there is.”

  Chapter 16

  Two hours later, Pamela pulled up in front of her cottage feeling worn out. She still had an afternoon of interviews to get through to find her replacement, and the prospect of selecting someone to take over her beloved sanctuary felt overwhelming.

  She got out of the truck and greeted each of the dogs. As she made her way to the porch steps, Rodney came out from some bushes near the side of the house and said hello. She scratched behind his silver-tipped ears and gave his back a long rub. The sunlight shimmered off the diamond in Pamela’s engagement ring and Rodney reached out with his front paws to grab at the shiny object.

  “Oh, no, buddy,” Pamela chastised as she removed the ring from her finger and slipped it into her purse. “I can just see me explaining to Bob how a raccoon ate my ring.”

  Satisfied with his moment of attention, Rodney waddled back into the bushes. Pamela climbed the steps to her front door and went inside.

  She had just retrieved a cup of tea from the microwave and was going to have five minutes of peace with her feet curled up on the couch when the dogs started barking. A few seconds later, she heard a car pulling up to her house.

  Pamela looked over at the clock on the microwave and silently cursed. The first of her interviews was over half an hour early. She put the tea down on the coffee table and went to the front door. Then she noticed the silence.

  “That’s odd,” she said to herself as she reached for the doorknob. “This one must be really good with animals.”

  She opened the door and saw a tall man hunched over in her driveway with his back to her, petting each of the dogs.

  “You’re pretty good with animals,” she called out.

  At the sound of her voice, the man turned to greet her.

  “Daniel,” she gasped.

  “Hello, Pamela,” Daniel said as he took a step closer to the house. All the dogs followed close behind him.

  She walked out to the porch and gazed down at him. He appeared to be a little leaner and his eyes had dark circles beneath them. His skin seemed paler and his warm features looked strained, as if all of the burdens in his life had finally come to etch their way across his face. This was a wearier version of the Daniel she had known before his disappearance from her life.

  “How are you?” he asked as he climbed the steps to her porch.

  She took in a deep breath and nodded. “I’m fine,” she said. “How are you?” she inquired, trying to sound upbeat.

  He came up to her and peered into her cool gray eyes. “I’m fine,” he replied with a faint smile.

  “Liar,” she murmured. “You look like shit.”

  His smile widened. “Shit does not suit you, Pamela. Why don’t you try crap, or even hell, but not shit.” He took a step closer to her.

  She laughed. “Well, you still look like shit to me.”

  “You look wonderful to me,” he whispered.

  An uncomfortable moment of silence filled the air between them. There were so many things to say, but neither said a word.

  Seconds ticked by and Pamela could feel the strain building between them. The smell of his spicy cologne encircled her and instantly flashes of their night together invaded her thoughts. Her pulse quickened as her body yearned for his. Pamela fought to maintain control as their silence persisted. Unable to stand it any longer, she finally asked, “What happened to you, Daniel?”

  He took in a deep breath and turned away. “The day after the party Bob came to see me.”

  “Your landlady told me about that,” she confirmed. “I went to your place looking for you and she mentioned that Bob had been there.”

  Daniel walked to the porch railing. “Yeah, T.J. said you had stopped by. I dropped my bags off at my old place before I headed out here.”

  “So how long are you staying in New Orleans?”

  He turned back to her and rested his hip against the railing. “Long enough to open a new office for my father. He wants to expand his import business, and he asked me to come down here and get it going.”

  “Is that where you went, back home to work with your father?”

  He nodded.

  “Why? I thought you said you and your father didn’t get along.”

  “It was part of a deal I made with him.” He paused and ran his hands through his hair. “When Bob came to my place, he told me he was going to stop giving you money unless I left town. He said he was going to have the loan called on your facility. He wanted me out of your life. I didn’t want to leave, so I called my old man and asked him for the balance of my trust fund. I wanted to make sure Bob couldn’t hurt you. My old man agreed to transfer the money from my trust fund over to you, but he had one condition; I had to come home and take over the business. I figured I had no choice but to go. It was the only way I could make sure you would always be safe from Bob.” He slowly walked up to her.

  “You could have said something to me,” she argued. “You could have called and told me what was going on. Asked me what I wanted to do. We could have talked about it.”

  He rubbed his hand across his chin as he stopped in front of her. “You would have stubbornly refused my offer. And you probably would have gon
e back to Bob and kissed his ass until he was appeased.”

  Pamela looked down at the porch deck beneath her feet. “You don’t know that,” she whispered.

  He raised her chin with his hand until her eyes met his. “I know you,” he declared. “The only problem with my whole plan was that once you had the money I believed you wouldn’t need me anymore. I figured you would forget about me and I hoped I would forget about you. But then my father returned from his recent business trip and told me that he had met you.” Daniel removed his hand from beneath her chin. “Then he ordered me to pack my bags and move back to New Orleans.”

  “So why are you here?”

  He placed his hands behind his back. “Because my father said I was an idiot to ever leave you and he was right.” He inched closer to her. “I know what I did was wrong and I’m sorry I didn’t call or tell you—”

  “Look, Daniel,” she said, cutting him off. “I’m not going to stand here and pretend your running off didn’t hurt. It did, but things have changed and I really can’t take your money.” She turned and walked back into her house.

  Daniel followed her inside. “What’s changed? I want to be with you and I hoped you would want to be with me. I thought we could talk this through.”

  She went over to her desk and picked up the envelope Edward Phillips had given to her. She turned back to him, trying to keep the storm of emotions swirling inside of her hidden from view. “And then what, Daniel? Date? Spend a few more nights in bed and see how it goes?”

  “Pamela, this is new territory for me,” he said, impatiently. “I want us to have a chance together.”

  She walked across the living room to him and held out the large brown envelope. “When you left, you blew any chance we ever had. Here, I don’t want your money. I don’t need it.”

  He looked down at the envelope but did not reach for it. “What do you mean you don’t need it?” he questioned, glaring at her. “When I left Bob was about to cut you off at the knees.”

  She avoided his eyes and focused instead on the envelope in her hand. “Bob and I have come to an understanding.”

  There was silence. She raised her eyes and caught sight of Daniel’s face. His mouth was pulled tight in a painful grimace and the menacing darkness had returned to his eyes.

  “I never thought you were the kind of woman to sell yourself to a man, even to save your facility,” he growled.

  “It’s not like that,” she refuted as she raised her head high. “I have had some medical problems lately, and Bob has been there for me.”

  Daniel cursed and threw his hands in the air. “You’ve been sick!” he shouted, sounding more hurt than angry. “Why didn’t you say something to me?”

  “Because you weren’t here, Daniel. Bob was, and he has promised to continue to be there for me. I realized after you left that I do need someone to help me. I need someone I can count on.”

  “And you think Bob is going to be there for you? After what he did to you the first time round, how on earth can you trust him again?”

  “Where in the hell were you, Daniel?! When things got tough, you ran. You showed me the kind of man you are and—”

  “I left to protect you!” he shouted.

  “Protect me! You ran off leaving me…” She shut her mouth and turned away from him.

  “Yes, I left you,” he said in a strained voice behind her. “I left, and I’m sorry. Don’t throw away what we had because you think I can’t make a go at a relationship. I want us to try again. I know I let you down, but I want you to give me a second chance. Can you give me that chance, Pamela?”

  She felt a wave of nausea grip her insides. She struggled against the bout of morning sickness and prayed for Daniel not to see it. She took in a few deep breaths and turned around to face him.

  “Please take your money and go,” she pleaded as she held out the envelope to him.

  Daniel backed away. “Keep the money. I don’t want it. And you don’t want Bob. You’re just running back to something you know because you’re afraid. But the safest choice is not always the right choice, Pamela. And sometimes a person has to run away to realize what they had.” He paused and looked into her eyes. “I know I love you, and I came back hoping that you might love me, too.” He turned away from her and walked over to the front door. “I hope one day you will learn that Bob can never make you happy. When you do, come and see me…I’ll be waiting.” He slammed the door shut behind him.

  Pamela sank to her knees as she clutched the envelope to her chest. And for the first time since Daniel had left, she finally released all of the emotion she had kept safely locked away. She curled up on the floor and began to cry. As she lay on the floor, blinded by her tears, she felt a soft nudge against her hand. When she wiped the tears away, her eyes beheld Louis on the floor beside her, pressing his head against her hand. Shocked that the little squirrel had ventured so far from his cage, Pamela let go of the envelope and reached out to pick him up. She sat up and cradled Louis in her hands, feeling comforted by his concern. As she gently stroked the squirrel’s back, she felt the tears, once more, fill her eyes. Not only had she lost her one chance at happiness with another, she realized she was about to walk away from the only contentment she had ever found. The loss of her animals, and the comfort they had always given her, enveloped her with an unfamiliar emptiness. Overwhelmed by her sorrow, Pamela began to gently rock back and forth as she sat on the floor, holding her dear little Louis against her chest.

  * * * *

  The following day Pamela returned to the city to meet the decorator, Linda, and go over design plans for the nursery. She was on edge as her white Ford pick-up maneuvered down the pothole-laden streets of uptown New Orleans, on her way to Bob’s home. The interviews from the last few days had left her doubting that she could ever find anyone to run her facility. All the candidates she had met with were either too young, too inexperienced, too ignorant, or just did not have the right personality to work with wild animals. Bob had told her she was being too picky and felt anyone with a clear face and a high school education could do what she did. But what had really been bothering her was the visit from Daniel. She had tried to forget that he was back. She had even convinced herself that he was no longer a part of her life. But every time she looked down at her belly she realized that was a worthless rationalization. And from the moment she got out of bed until she fell asleep at night, the idea of him, the look in his eyes, the sound of his voice, even the smell of his cologne, haunted her.

  As she pulled up into Bob’s driveway, she could feel the stress mounting in her body. Her hands tightly gripped the steering wheel, and when she finally let go, her fingers were stiff. She tried to convince herself that it was just her emotions running in overdrive since she had so much to do between the facility and preparing for the baby. But as she got out of her beat-up truck, feeling more like a maid than a mistress of the mansion, she knew what the real problem was. Her only concern was how long she would be able to continue like this without erupting.

  “Hey,” Bob said as he opened the front door for her. “I thought I heard your piece of shit pulling into the driveway.” He spied the dingy white Ford pick-up parked on his lavish red brick driveway. “Next thing on the list is to get you a new car,” he told her as he ushered her inside. “Can’t have you pulling up in that thing. What will the neighbors think? After all, you’re my fiancée, not the gardener.”

  “I thought you would be at work,” she remarked, ignoring his comment about her truck.

  “No, I wanted to be here with you to pick out things for the nursery. And,” he said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a key, “this is for you. It’s only for the front door, but I’ll get copies of the back door made, and remind me before you leave to show you how the alarm works.” He handed her the key.

  Pamela took the key from him and a sickening feeling gripped her. She knew this feeling could not be attributed to morning sickness.

  “And I wanted t
o show Linda the dining room,” Bob added as he put a friendly arm about her waist. “I want to remove all traces of Clarissa from this house. I want you to make it over for me. Turn it into a sophisticated showplace that will be the envy of the entire city.”

  Pamela just smiled as she let Bob escort her up the stairs.

  “Oh, and we received our first social invitation as a couple,” Bob excitedly informed her. “Val Easterling invited us to a party she is having at her home in the French Quarter this weekend.”

  “Really?” Pamela hesitated for a moment. “How do you know Mrs. Easterling?”

  “I’ve met her at a few parties, and she is the person to know for anyone who wants to get into politics in this town. I suspect she may have heard about my political aspirations and wants to talk to me. I think our getting back together is really going to pay off, P.A.”

  Pamela suspected Val Easterling had another motive entirely for inviting the two of them to her party.

  Once they entered the room slated for the nursery, Pamela spotted a petite woman with thick glasses, dark brown hair, and big brown eyes. She had a long face, a hooked nose, sunken cheeks, and a sallow complexion that alluded to her Italian heritage. She instantly reminded Pamela of an opossum.

  “Linda Oliveri, this is my former wife, and now my fiancée, Pamela Wells.”

  Linda extended her hand toward Pamela. “Congratulations on all of your good fortune.” She looked Pamela over from head to toe.

  The blue cotton dress and plain white flats Pamela had chosen to wear seemed almost gauche next to Linda’s tailored suit and high-heeled designer shoes. Pamela wished she could escape to her sanctuary and be surrounded by her animals, but she pushed her regrets down deep inside of her and forced herself to stop thinking of her former life. This was her life now.

  “Darlin’, looking at you no one could ever tell you’re pregnant,” Linda said in a rather deep, almost masculine-sounding voice. “You’re very petite. Oh well, enjoy it.” Linda gave a warm, soulful laugh. “When I had my first boy, I gained damn near fifty pounds. My husband used to say I looked like a watermelon. I was much more careful for my second. Only gained twenty-five pounds with Mario.” She walked to the corner of the room, opened her briefcase, and pulled out her notepad. “Now, Bob gave me a few ideas of what you needed in here, but I wanted to meet with you and go over some basic designs to get a rough idea of where we are going,” she stated, moving into the center of the room.