I'm Not A Dragon's Mate!

by Sandra R Neeley

  Kaid answered him, “Like I said, we need to talk.”

  Daniel nodded his head in agreement and sat back on his heels, waiting for Kaid to tell him what it was that he needed to know.

  The Wolf stood and made to follow Avaleigh. He stopped a few feet from the group and looked back at Kaid. Kaid just barely inclined his head, and the Wolf turned and trotted toward the path that Avaleigh had taken.

  “He’ll watch over her,” Kaid said as he swung his attention back to Daniel — then, he started his story. “Avaleigh and I met in captivity.” Daniel raised his eyebrows and cocked his head like a confused animal would, but before he could ask, Kaid continued. “We had both been drugged, taken against our wills, and kept prisoner. We’d never met before I saw her there, but I’m guessing that since they drugged me to abduct me, they did the same to her. She doesn't really remember exactly how it happened for her. But, regardless, that’s how we found each other. We were tortured emotionally and physically, starved, abused.” Kaid went on to tell him the story that the rest of the clan already knew, and with each word Daniel’s heart hurt more and more for his Mate. He hurt for what they’d both endured, and the overwhelming need to eradicate any trace of the male who hurt his woman and her Alpha was hard to control. He tried to stay focused as Kaid's words just continued on. “Avaleigh saved me, thinking that I was simply a Bear that deserved freedom, and then I saved her,” as he filled in the details of their escape. They all sat there quietly, each reliving the horror Kaid and Avaleigh had endured. Then, when the clan thought the story was finished, unexpectedly Kaid continued on, and each of those males’ hearts broke a little more for Avaleigh that day. “Nobody knows this part, but me,” he said as he stared at the ground near his feet. “She may be angry with me for telling you… she will be angry with me for telling you. But you need to know.” He raised his eyes to Daniel’s. “Not only was Ave repeatedly raped by this male, she was bred by him. She became pregnant twice. The first time she miscarried from him beating her so severely, it almost killed her. The second time, she miscarried because I claimed her.” Daniel snarled, but Kaid just kept talking, “When I claimed her to keep him from being able to track her, she asked me to bite her again. She knew she was bred again, and she was hoping that my DNA would trigger another miscarriage. It did. I nursed her through it and here we are today. She’s struggled with it ever since, not just the horror of what we lived through, but the idea that she was thankful when she miscarried. We both were. She was thankful that she wasn't forced to bear his offspring. And for that she beats herself up, nonstop.”

  “Because it was her child, too,” Daniel said, more a statement than a question.

  “Yes, because it was hers, too, she thinks she should have loved it even though we all know better. He was using her as a fucking incubator, not a mother to his young,” Kaid said. Then Kaid met Daniel’s eyes. “She thinks he ruined her. She thinks no male could want her now.”

  “That’s ridiculous. I love her more than I did before I knew her strength-” Daniel started.

  But Kaid cut him off, “Do you want children?”

  Daniel didn't answer right away, surprised by the question.

  “Do you?” Kaid asked again.

  “I’ve never really thought about it,” Daniel answered truthfully. “It’s not an option for me, I think. Human women shouldn't carry Dragon’s younglings — there is a great chance they would die in childbirth. The Dragon is so powerful, even in the womb, that they could steal all the mother’s strength. I would not risk my Avaleigh for a youngling I do not have and do not need.”

  “Good,” Kaid replied. Daniel looked at Kaid not comprehending. Kaid filled him in. “Her womb was destroyed. Avaleigh can never have children. His young ripped her apart as they left her body. And she’s convinced herself that any male she commits to is destined to resent her for her not being able to give him children. I’ve tried to tell her otherwise, but with her knowing how important children are to most shifters, she just won’t believe me.”

  A barely audible, “Aw, fuck me,” came from Goldy. Goldy looked at Kaid. “I didn't know she couldn't have any, Kaid. I swear I would never have talked about how important kids are to shifters if I’d known.”

  “I know, Goldy. She knows you didn't know. She was never upset with you.” He returned his attention to Daniel.

  Daniel sat back on his butt, his mind reeling with the pain that his female had endured. “He stole everything from her, and in so doing he also insured that she would think of him every time that she sees a mother with a child,” Daniel murmured.

  “Yep,” Kaid replied quietly, but he wasn't done. He allowed Daniel to process all that he’d been told before he dropped the last bit of information that Daniel didn't have yet.

  “Daniel?” Kaid said. Daniel looked up to meet Kaid's eyes. Kaid looked at him a second longer before continuing, “He was a Dragon.”

  And Daniel’s hopes came crashing down on him. Now he knew why she wouldn't have him. When she looked at him, she saw Dragon, and a Dragon had almost destroyed her. She wouldn't have him because she feared him. No matter how much she may or may not want him, she feared him more. He looked at the males in front of him, varying degrees of pity on their faces. Bam straight out crying, tears streaming down his face. He wasn't offended by their pity. He knew it was because they loved Avaleigh, and they wanted her happy. He was her Mate and represented her ultimate happiness, and they didn't believe that she would ever accept him. So they felt sorry for him and her.

  He met the eyes of the Alpha again, “I won’t give up. I’m not that Dragon. I will avenge her. I will love her. And I will never stop trying to win her. I will earn her trust and her love.” He tilted his head back again, exposing his throat, “I request sanctuary, Alpha.”

  Kaid thought about it for a moment, “Granted, but if she runs from us, you’ll be banished. Avaleigh is what matters to us. I’m allowing you time to win her over, but if you cause her to run from us, you will be made to leave. Don’t forget that.”

  Daniel was okay with that and said as much, “I wouldn't have it any other way. She will always come first.”

  The other guys came over and slapped him on the back, welcoming him to the clan, even if it may be only temporary. He threw his glance to the tree line where’d she disappeared, and Kaid caught it.

  “Come on, time we got back. Damage control is a bitch when that woman is angry. The longer we stay away, the more time she has to think. Let me talk to her first, tell her I’ve granted you sanctuary. I think she’ll take it better coming from me.”

  Bane snorted his disagreement as he shot them a glance as they started the walk back to her cabin.

  “Kaid, who is the Dragon that hurt you and Avaleigh?” Daniel finally asked.

  “Male named Lurin, I’ll tell you about him,” and he did. He told him all he remembered, along with where they’d been kept and where it was.

  “You gonna get him, Daniel?” Bam asked as they walked.

  “Yeah, Bam. I’m gonna get him,” Daniel replied.

  Avaleigh was sitting on the floor in the corner of her kitchen, arms wrapped around herself trying hard to not let the fear and anger overtake her. Kaid was gonna let the Dragon stay; in her bones she just knew it. She’d finally felt safe again here with her boys. She’d made a home. She took care of them, and they took care of her. And now a Dragon had to come into her safe place and ruin everything. In her mind, she knew he wasn't Lurin. She knew he didn't intend her harm, but emotionally she hadn't been able to control the unreasonable fear she experienced each time she saw his Dragon looking out at her. Daniel was beautiful, and he elicited a response from her body that she’d never experienced before — she craved him like nothing and no one before him. But she feared him. And that fear was what kept her from accepting him. It was so fucking frustrating. She sat there, an internal battle raging inside her, waiting, hoping she was wrong, and they’d send him away. But she knew better — she knew they th
ought that “Mate” meant everything was going to be okay now. That “Mate” solved all things. They just didn't know that she could never be anyone’s Mate. And their Mate wasn't a damned Dragon, but apparently hers was. So she sat there in silence, unsure of her next move. The silence was comforting to her. She hadn't turned on the TV or any lights. She didn't even have the AC on or the ceiling fans. Just silence. Except for that scratching sound. What the hell was that? A slight scratching, scrabbling sound coming from the bathroom. A muffled umpf, then a slight clicking sound on her hardwood floor. Then she knew. As a Wolf peeked his head around the door jamb of her bedroom to look at her, she knew. Mav, still in Wolf form, had climbed through her still-opened bathroom window. She raised one arm to indicate he could come closer for a hug, and so he did. He approached her, laid his big head on her lap, and gave a deep sigh. So there they sat. Her slowly dragging her fingers through the fur between his ears as they waited for Kaid to come to them. They knew he would at some point — it was just a matter of when.

  She heard the voices just after Mav did. He’d sat up and pointed his ears toward her front door a few moments before she actually heard anything. Muffled voices were outside her cabin. Then she clearly heard Kaid say, “Let me talk to her, it’ll be okay.” So… there it was. He’d granted Daniel sanctuary, and he wanted to be the one to try to explain it to her. She took a deep breath, and the apprehension she felt ran through her so quickly it caused her to tear up. This fucking sucked, she thought. I don’t freaking cry! And yet all she’d done since she awakened this morning was cry. She fucking hated it. Mav gave a soft whine and bumped her chin with his cold wet nose. She looked at him and dragged her hand through his fur again, “Guess it looks like I’m gonna have to leave,” she whispered to him sadly. He tossed his head back and forth in a “no” gesture, but she was saved any additional denial from him when a knock sounded on her door.

  “Ave, baby, let me in.” It was Kaid, and she didn't want to let him in. So she sat there. Mav looked from her to the door and back. She still sat there. Kaid tried the doorknob; it was locked. She knew it sent a strong message — she never locked her doors when they were all there. They were all welcomed to come into her home at any time. Except now. She wanted to be alone, well, except for Mav. He made a good companion in his Wolf form. She smiled and patted him on the head.

  Kaid knocked harder on her door, “Ave, open the door, baby. We need to talk.” Still no answer from her. “If you don’t open this door, Ave, I’m gonna break the damn thing down!”

  Avaleigh looked at Mav, “So?” she said to Mav, “If I leave, I wont need a door, right?”

  “Maverik!” Kaid yelled, “I know you're in there, too. Open this Goddamned door!”

  Avaleigh tightened her hand in Mav’s fur to keep him from moving toward the door. He looked from the door to her again, a question in his eyes.

  “Right Fucking Now, Maverik!!” Kaid shouted.

  Mav shifted under her hand. “I’m sorry, darlin’, that’s ‘Alpha’ Kaid, not friend Kaid. I have to.”

  Avaleigh just watched him go open her door and let Kaid into her house.

  “Go, Mav. Ave and I need to get a few things straightened out.”

  Mav looked at her sadly before he stepped through her door, but before he pulled it shut behind him, “Don’t do it, Avaleigh. We’re still here.” Mav had never called her by her name before, and it made her tear up all over again. Before he shut the door, she caught a glimpse of Daniel standing on her porch, looking as heartbroken as she felt, and didn't that just make her feel even worse. Fuck, she just couldn't win.

  “What’s he talking about, baby?”

  She shrugged her shoulders and didn't meet his eyes.

  “Ave, you thinking about leaving?” He tried again. She still didn't answer.

  “If that’s what’s going through your head, you can just ditch that idea right here and now. It’s not happening, you’re not leaving us. What did you say to us when we built this place for you? That you’d leave it in a heartbeat to follow us if we ever left here. Well, ditto. You leave here, we’re following. Got that?”

  She did look at him then. “I can’t be where he is, Kaid.”

  “Yes, you can. You have been where he is, and it’s not the same as when we were near Lurin. He’s not the same. Yes, he’s a Dragon, but he’s honorable and good. He’s not like the other one, baby.”

  She didn't answer him. She just shook her head as she looked across the room, away from him, her tears falling silently down her face. A few minutes passed as they sat in silence. “You gave him sanctuary, didn't you?” she finally asked in a whisper.

  “Yeah, I did. He deserves it, Ave. He asked respectfully. He doesn't want to force you — he just wants to be near you. To have the opportunity to prove himself. He’s searched his entire existence for his One. And when he finally finds her, she won’t even allow him to try to earn her trust. Can you imagine how that feels?” he finished as he tried to gain eye contact with her.

  “His Dragon will hurt me, Kaid.” Even as she said this, she knew it was a lie. She was just grasping at straws, and they both knew this.

  “No, he won’t, baby. You fucking own him. He will not hurt you, or anything or anyone that you hold dear,” Kaid said to her.

  Avaleigh met his eyes then, “Complete the claim, Kaid.”

  “What?!” he asked as confusion crossed his face.

  “Complete the claim, Kaid. You said you didn't care if I was your One or not. Complete the claim, and he’ll leave.”

  “I can’t, baby. Can’t you see what I’d be stealing from you if I did that? You belong together, he’d slowly lose his mind, and you’d never be satisfied, never happy. I can’t do that to you, Ave, no matter how much I’d like to call you mine. You’re not, you’re his. And you were right to keep telling me no.”

  She didn't answer him or meet his gaze again.

  “Baby, I-” he started, but she cut him off.

  “Do. Not. Call. Me. Baby. You no longer have that right. You traded my security, my happiness for the needs of a shifter that you don’t really even know.”

  “That is not how it is, Avaleigh. You know better than that.” When she didn't reply to him or make any move to interact with him again, he got to his feet. He looked down at her with his heart in his throat. He loved her, and it killed him to put her in this position, but that’s what Alphas did, right? They sacrificed for the greater good, and right now it was for the greater good that Avaleigh give her Mate a chance to love her, to heal her. Nobody but Daniel could heal Avaleigh. And she’d suffered enough. So Kaid had no choice but to do this, because he did love her. “You won’t leave here, Avaleigh. If you do, we will all follow you anyway, so it’s pointless. You will get over this anger, this fear. You’ll see that it’s for the best. He will not force you; it’s not in his nature.” She snorted in disbelief at that one. “It’s not, Ave. He’s a good male. I’m his Alpha now. He’s got to abide by my rules. You will not be forced. But by the same token, you will treat him with respect, and you won’t shut him out.” He waited for a second, but she gave no indication that she even heard him. He headed for her door, stopping before he pulled it shut behind himself. “I love you, this is for you, Ave. You’ll see that one day.” She didn't answer, so he just pulled the door closed softly behind him. She listened to his footsteps leading down the stairs of her front porch and away. And another set leading up her stairs, toward her, and the sound of shuffling as a body slid down her door and came to rest on her porch. Apparently Daniel had decided he was guarding her tonight. Wasn't that just lovely, imprisoned by a Dragon again.

  Chapter 14

  The morning found the guys sitting around the table in the main house, eating cold cereal and toast. Avaleigh was not with them. She had not made them breakfast, and she had not spoken to anyone since her conversation with Kaid the night before. Kaid had finally convinced Daniel to leave Avaleigh's porch by explaining that it would make her feel les
s like a prisoner and more like she had some control over what was happening in her life. He stayed in the main house, but he insisted on being in Bam and Bane’s room, with the window open, as that was the room that faced her cabin directly. That way he could hear if she tried to leave, or if she called out during the night. So it was that he was sitting with the guys in the kitchen of the main house, too. Bane and Bam had spent the night at Bam's place, and they had joined them mid-morning as well. It was a Saturday, so no work for today.

  “What do you do for a living?” Bam asked Daniel.

  “I’m a finish carpenter. I’m really good with my hands,” Daniel answered.

  “We’re in construction,” Goldy told him.

  “You’re welcome to work with us. Together we make a whole crew, and we could always use an extra set of hands,” Kaid said.

  “I’ll take you up on that — I appreciate the offer,” Daniel said. He looked over his shoulder through the kitchen window again. He could clearly see Avaleigh's cabin. He missed her so much it hurt. Even if she was giving him hell, at least he had her attention. It was better than nothing.

  Bane reached out to him, “You okay?”

  “Yeah. It’s just hard not being near her. I haven't even mated her yet, and it fucking hurts. Can you imagine how deep the bond will be once we are one?” He rubbed his chest just over his heart and looked out the window again.

  “This is the first time she hasn't spent the day with us and cooked us breakfast. I miss her, too,” Bam said so quietly that he almost whispered.