When the heat subsided and Hanson softened, I climbed off him and rolled onto the bed next to him.
“I’ll be right back,” I said and got out of bed.
I walked to the bathroom and cleaned up. When I returned to the bed, Hanson was already dozing off. I climbed in under the sheets with him. He rolled onto his side, and I did the same, my back against his chest. He curled his body around mine like a question mark and held onto me as we both drifted off to sleep.
“I love you,” I whispered, into his chest. “My fiance.”
I guessed he wasn’t completely asleep, because he half opened an eye and smiled.
“I love you too.”
I wasn’t a hundred percent confident about having a child and a relationship yet. There would still be rough days ahead, and I didn’t know what to expect. What I did know was that Hanson would always stick by my side, and together, we would make it through anything that came our way.
And life would be better because we had each other, and our baby boy too.
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Don’t Forget About Me: A Second Chance Amnesia Romance
Copyright 2017 by Eva Luxe and Juliana Conners; All Rights Reserved.
Chapter 1 – Brian
Present Day
I was supposed to be helping to choose new recruits for my Florida Sharks professional football team but I couldn’t help getting a little bit sappy. Watching athletes right before they hit the prime of their career was inspiring. But it also made me nostalgic, reminiscent. And still a little fucking heartbroken.
I was at the Sharks’ Training Facility, watching the training session for the rookies. They trained at night when we were done using the fields. Coach Rudi Thompson stood next to me, and we both took notes on the new recruits.
“They’re fit enough,” Coach said with a growl in his voice. “That’s for damn sure.”
I chuckled. “That’s because every time they mess up, Coach Donald makes them run laps.”
Coach Rudi shrugged. “It works. They learn that way. I should do it more with the rest of you. You’re all too cocky for your own good. That’s the problem.”
I laughed. “Shit, we’re doing cardio outside of training sessions enough as it is, thank you very much.”
Coach grinned, but the grin didn’t last long.
“What do you see?” I asked.
Coach shook his head. “It’s what I’m not seeing. I don’t see a hell of a lot of potential among these guys,” he said. “What am I supposed to do when someone retires?”
He had a point. Every now and then, we needed to pull someone from the B teams and C teams. They weren’t anything special yet. They played games just like we did, but they weren’t nearly as popular. Once a player was good enough and we had space, they’d get moved up to the real team.
“We’ll see what they’re worth in their game, tomorrow,” I said.
The Sharks were off for a while. When that happened, we took time to watch the other team's games. We learned from them, we laughed at them, and we scouted from them. It was a team effort.
I played running back for the team, and I was damn good at what I did. I was one of the best players on the field. That might sound like vanity to some people, but it was the honest truth. I enjoyed what I did. I’d played for the Hurricanes for my college team and worked my way up to professional status with the Sharks soon after.
I’d dreamed about making it to this level ever since I was a little kid. Now that I was living the dream, my life was almost perfect.
Almost.
There were definitely holes in my life where things were missing. Love, a relationship, companionship. It was something I tried not to think about most of the time, and when I did, I told myself I didn’t want or need any of that bullshit. I played pro ball and nothing was supposed to get me down. Especially girlie crap like that.
I know that since I’m not in a relationship, I should be able to fuck around with whoever I want. My best friend Hanson used to tell me I should be like him, on the prowl for one-night stands and cheap fucking, because I could. There was a time when he was like that and would want me to go hunting for fresh pussy together, but he had gone and settled down, by dating Lacey and then marrying her.
The man was happier than I’d seen him in a long time. He deserved it. He’d pulled his life together, and he and Lacey had just had a baby. And he’d helped me a lot along the way. Especially one time when I really needed it.
So maybe now that Hanson had Lacey, he understood why I had just never been into playing the field. It seemed empty and meaningless, whereas what he and Lacey had— and what I used to have— was something that lasted and was more permanent. Or at least, that’s how it was supposed to be.
There was a time, just after Hanson had met Lacey, that I’d felt sick to my stomach thinking that I would never have the happily ever after I deserved. Now I could be happy for them, like a man should be for his best friend, but I couldn’t help but think of everything I myself had lost. Nor could I seem to let go of worry that I would never find anything like it again, because I couldn’t seem to stop focusing on the fucking past.
Once upon a time, I was certain I would have my own happily ever after. You always do when you have a woman on your arm and you see your future in her eyes. But I was young and stupid and that had been a long time ago. I was the new and improved version of me, trying hard to put idealist hopes behind me and become impervious to love. I wouldn’t allow myself to be heartbroken ever again.
The wind blew, warm and noticeable, the way Florida wind never really gets cold. I breathed in, and I could taste the ocean on the tip of my tongue. There was something about living this close to water that made me feel at home. Whenever I was inland, traveling with the team, I felt antsy until I got back to the coast.
I looked around the field, losing interest in the practice session. It was just a bunch of repeat exercises, and I had done so many of them myself it had made me sick.
The cheerleaders were training to the side of the field. Slender, flexible women did tricks that made me wonder what they could do in the bedroom if they could bend like that. I could think of a few ways to spend the night with one of them. They wore short shorts that left just enough to the imagination to make me think of sex, and tops that bared their stomachs.
They were every man out here today’s wet dream. By the looks of it, they had more attention than the guys on the field. In fact, the players were sneaking glances toward the cheerleaders as well. But even though I liked to look, thanks to my past, I never could seem to bring myself to give all of me to any girl no matter how hot she was.
“Alright, ladies,” a familiar voice said.
I whipped my head around, trying to look for the woman it had come from.
Could it be her? Could it really fucking be her?
“Take five, have some water. Then right back at it.”
I shivered.
The women jogged off. I scanned them, looking for the owner of that voice. It had tugged at something very deep inside me, but I couldn’t place it. Somewhere in the back of my mind, a little voice warned me that I didn’t want to know, either, but I shoved it away.
I needed to know who that voice belonged to.
The ladies returned to the field a few minutes later and lined up to do their routine again. Sexy bodies all in a row, but I most definitely wasn’t interested. What tiny spark of arousal I had had from looking at them was overtaken by the fact that I thought I had just heard her.
“Ready?” that same voice shouted. “Let’s go!”
I took a step or two closer to the cheerleaders. My eyes fell on their coach, and I realized that it really was
her.
Sadie Anderson.
Fuck, I knew it was her voice. I should have listened to the little voice telling me not to find the owner of it, but, instead I listened to the stupid part of me that couldn’t help but do exactly that.
Now that I knew, I couldn’t push it all away again. There Sadie was, facing the cheerleaders. A dream. A nightmare.
Her raven hair was pulled back against her head into a ponytail. I couldn’t see her eyes from here, but they were burned into my memory. Gray, like a stormy sky. Slate when she was angry. Her body was taut and muscular. Sexy as fuck. She’d always been a cheerleader with raw talent for anything athletic.
It was interesting to see that after everything, she still ended up being part of that world. It’s funny how some things you could forget as if it never happened, and other things were ingrained into your very being forever.
Sadie was the one who got away. She was the woman who I had thought I would spend the rest of my life with. She’d been my high school sweetheart. We had taken each other’s virginity. She had been everything to me.
And then she had forgotten about me. Literally.
I took a deep breath and tried to forget about her all over again. But I was the unlucky son of a bitch that remembered everything, no matter how much I wanted to forget.
I always told myself— and I tried very hard to convince myself while staring at Sadie standing there— that maybe I could forget her, the way she had forgotten me. But no, I wouldn’t want that. If I forgot, I would be in danger of repeating the same heartache again. And I wasn’t sure I would be able to survive that. I’d barely survived it the first time, all those years ago.
I sometimes didn’t know if I held myself back from being with other women because I could never love anyone the way I had loved Sadie, and, admittedly, still fucking do, or whether it was because if I was able to find someone like Sadie, I felt sure that something would inevitably happen to take her away from me, just like what happened with Sadie. I really hadn’t ever wanted to find out the answer. But now, looking at her, I realize that my heart is still dying to know.
The memory of what happened on Prom night was so vivid, I felt the horror, the agony, all over again. I watched Sadie now as she walked back and forth, correcting the cheerleaders’ stances. This was torture. Dammit, I should just have turned around and left.
As if she could feel my eyes on her, she slowly turned. Her eyes were gray, the color of the sky when it was overcast. I didn’t let her eyes meet mine before I looked away.
Chapter 2 – Brian
High School
“Let’s go to High Rock,” Sadie said to me.
We had just left prom. All our friends had already gone, and only the nerds were left, slow dancing at arm’s length like they were going to catch cooties.
Sadie and I were comfortable around each other. I knew her body almost as well as I knew my own. We hadn’t done it yet, but I wanted to. Tonight, if I could.
“Sure,” I said, jumping at the chance. Everyone went to High Rock. It was close to South Pointe Pier, and it was the local hangout for all us teenagers. “We just have to go home and get dressed first.”
Sadie shook her head. “If I go home, my dad won’t let me go out again.”
“So? Come to my place. You can borrow some of my sister’s clothes. I know she won’t mind.”
Sadie smiled and nodded, leaning in so I could kiss her full, perfect lips. Kissing Sadie was like a dream. Every time her lips touched mine, I forgot about everyone and everything around me. She was my whole world. At that point we’d been dating for two years, and all I wanted was to be with her in every way possible.
“And tonight, at High Rock, I want you to make me yours, Brian McMurray,” she said.
I swallowed, and my body reacted to what she said. My stomach turned with nerves. I’d never done it before. So, I was hard immediately. I knew what to do in theory. God knew I got hard often enough just thinking about her. It was just the actual step that I needed to take.
And tonight, we would take it together.
We got changed at my place. In jeans, I felt much more comfortable than in my prom tuxedo. Sadie looked like sex on a stick. She wore a short skirt that showed off her curvy ass— I couldn’t help but think “easy access”— and a tank top that traced her ample breasts perfectly.
“You’re beautiful,” I said.
And I meant it. She was the most gorgeous girl I’d ever seen. I was so happy we were together, and that we were about to christen our relationship.
She stood on her toes and kissed me. Her makeup and hair were still the way she’d had then done for prom. So she looked all dolled up, but not in an obnoxious way. I loved that the soft pastels she’d chosen for her makeup were rather subtle but sparkly at the same time.
And the ringlets in her hair made me weak in my knees. All night they had made me think of the variation of the saying “she has me wrapped around her little finger,” but it was more like, “I want to wrap that curl around my little finger.” And then I wanted to pull her head close to me and kiss her, and do a lot more after that, too.
We made our way to High Rock, and everyone else was already there. Someone gave us alcohol, and we drank it from red plastic cups. We were only eighteen and we hadn’t had much to drink in the past, but we figured, what the hell, it’s prom night. You only live once, right?
After chit chatting with some friends, I climbed onto the rocks with Sadie and helped her up higher, to where some different friends of ours were. She was already wobbly from the alcohol in her system, and she clutched onto my hand. The night was warm, and the air humid, pressing down on us like a hand. I breathed in deeply, my stomach tight with nerves.
“Hey guys,” Sadie said to our friends.
“We all know what you guys came here to do,” said Matt, one of the guys on my football team. “So there’s no need to pretend it was to socialize.”
Sadie blushed and I traced my finger across her reddened cheek. I couldn’t help but adore how embarrassed she was about the fact that we were going to have sex. I could tell she was also just as excited as I was, though, because she smiled and turned her face towards me.
I bent down to kiss her, and she eagerly returned it.
“Get a room!” her friend Shelly said.
“Or at least a ledge of your own,” Matt chimed in.
“Very funny, asshole,” I told him. “But maybe we will.”
Everyone laughed again and Sadie nodded at me. She thought it was a great idea.
We moved farther away from the others, finding a spot that was semi-private. This was where most of our memories had been made. Here, we were going to make another one.
We started with making out, caressing and touching. I pulled the strap of her tank top to the side and then my hand made its way down to caress her familiar but still exciting breasts. We’d done everything but “all the way” sex before, and I knew her. I knew her body and what to do.
She climbed on top of me and my lips made their way to her nipple. Her left breast was hanging out of her tank top as I sucked on it. Every now and then I took my mouth away so I could marvel at her pink nipple standing erect for me. Then I went back for another delicious taste. I grinded my hips against her, and she gasped.
I was hard, and she could feel it. I pulled her panties down from underneath her skirt and fingered her, pushing my fingers into her pussy. She gasped and pressed her mouth against my neck to muffle the sound.
“It feels so good when you touch me,” she said.
I breathed in the scent of her hair— a mix of shampoo and hair spray— while my fingers rubbed her clit. I pulled up her skirt a bit more so I could see her naked pussy. She was dripping wet for me, while my fingers lightly squeezed her clit.
“I’m gonna come,” she whispered, and I said, “Good.”
She leaned back and let herself go for me, grinding her pussy into my hand while her juices poured out into it. As I rubbed he
r clit with one hand, I spread her pussy lips open wide so I could see all the way inside her, where I would soon get to put my cock, for the first time ever.
After a while, she was moaning and nearly screaming, so I put my hand over her mouth and drew her in closer to me as I continued to play with her pussy.
“Mmmm,” she moaned into my hand, bouncing up and down on me as I made her come again. “Oh my God, Brian.”
When she was done, she sat back down on my lap, while my finger was still plunged deep inside her tight little pussy hole. I could have gone on like that, playing with her sweet pussy and making her come over and over. But finally she put her hand on mine, asking me to stop.
“I want you, Brian,” she whispered.
This was it. The moment of truth. My cock strained against my pants, and I fumbled with my belt, struggling to get out of my jeans. I only pushed them down to my knees so we could recover easily.
I rolled onto her, and her thighs fell open for me, her legs on either side of my body. I was struggling to breathe.
“You’re trembling,” she said, and she was out of breath.
“I’ll be okay,” I said, as I quickly removed the condom from my pants pocket and put it on.
I had paid close attention in sex ed and I had even practiced at home— hoping and waiting for this chance to arrive— but I was still really bad at it. I fumbled a bit and then she helped me get it all the way on, both of us laughing and kissing until the job was finished.
Once the condom was finally on, I pressed the head of my cock against the entrance of her pussy, and she held her breath. Her gray eyes were so dark, they looked like the night sky above us. Her eyes bore into mine, and I pushed into her.
She whimpered, and I stopped. I knew from everything I’d read that it might hurt her. She shook her head.
“Don’t stop,” she whispered. “There was pain but now it feels good.”
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