Atonement (Love Undercover Book 3)

by LK Shaw

  We stared at each other for several beats before he relaxed back into his chair, leaning back slightly. A loud crack sounded, and then Brody was tumbling backwards, arms flailing until he hit the floor. I stared in shock until I couldn’t hold back my laughter any longer.

  “Mother fucker.” He scrambled to his feet and kicked the offending piece of furniture. “Piece of shit.”

  I barely got the words out. “I bet you’re wishing now that you’d let me call my guy for office furniture, aren’t ya?”

  A sense of relief flowed through me. Everything was going to be all right.

  Chapter 21

  I waved away the approaching hostess and strode through the nearly empty Monteverde toward the square four-top table near the back and its three occupants. What was a millionaire like Mr. King, with his designer suit, doing with two guys who were dressed like they shopped at a consignment store? I eased my pace as I spotted the gun the crewcut was carrying and pasted a pleasant smile on my face.

  “Good afternoon, Mr. King.”

  The two men on either side of King stiffened at my arrival, but the businessman merely leaned back in his chair and threaded his fingers in his lap. His leering gaze traveled the length of my body, and a nausea-inducing grin crossed his features.

  “Well, hello there, young lady. What can I do for you?”

  “I’m Agent Roberts with the Drug Enforcement Administration. I was hoping you’d be able to answer some questions for me regarding a narcotic called Rapture.”

  He smothered the grin while the other two shifted in their seats. I maintained a ready alertness in case either moved in a way I wasn’t comfortable with.

  “I’m not sure why you’d be asking me about that.” King’s lips pursed like he’d sucked on a lemon.

  “We have reports that the drug is moving through your establishment, Club Delight. We’d like to track down its source. I was hoping maybe you’d heard some of your employees talking? Or maybe they’d heard or seen something. Any information you can share would be helpful.”

  He rose from his seat and slowly buttoned his suit jacket. As though that was some kind of sign, the other two men stood as well, their beady eyes scanning my body. All three towered over me. A heavy weight settled in my gut, but I straightened my shoulders and stared confidently back.

  King took several steps until he stood directly in front of me. “I’m not sure what you’re insinuating by coming here, Agent Roberts, but I’m a very wealthy and powerful man. Bad things have happened to people who have tried to interfere with my business. I recommend you watch yourself.”

  “Is that a threat, Mr. King?”

  He merely grinned down at me. “Have a pleasant day.”

  King moved away from me and headed toward the front door. The silent men followed, both staring down at me as they walked past, the second one brushing against me, sending a cold chill down my spine. I stood there long after they’d gone, a sense of unease coursing through me. Finally forcing my body to move, I headed back to the office to talk to my boss.

  Gibson had been pissed once I got back to the office and told him what had gone down at the restaurant. He’d stormed and raged about me going in there without any backup. I didn’t remind him that he’d tasked Crawford and Brickman with following up some leads on the Sinaloa Cartel, which was another priority to Gibson.

  I wanted to forget about the entire day. At least for tonight. Tomorrow would be soon enough to worry about things. Which was why I was standing in front of the door of apartment 2B. I missed Preston. Between their other cases, and the surveillance work he and Brody were doing on Felipe and Cruz, we hadn’t had time to really talk.

  Our relationship had changed the other night. It was heading in a direction I most definitely wasn’t ready for. But I promised myself that I was going to give this thing between us a chance to become whatever it was going to be. A large part of me still didn't believe I deserved it, but I tried to push it away. Avoidance was something Dr. Carpenter and I talked about frequently. I’d become a pro at it. In this case, I think she’d approve.

  I hadn’t called beforehand. Maybe because I was hoping the man inside wouldn't be at home. Stop avoiding, Landon. I knocked on the door. Faint footsteps inside grew louder until they stopped, and I heard the lock on the other side disengage. A surprised Preston stood there looking at me.

  “Hi,” I smiled.

  “Hey,” he responded. That bourbon-smooth voice that never ceased to cause a shiver washed over me.

  “Can I come in?”

  Preston nervously gestured and stepped back. “Of course. What are you doing here?”

  I entered his apartment, feeling a little self-conscious now that I was here. Still, I was going to do my best to stop hiding. "I missed you the last few days."

  He relaxed at my words. "I missed you too."

  There was an uncomfortable silence. Since I was trying not to push him away, I wasn't sure how to act. Usually Preston was the one doing the chasing. He was the confident one. The bold one. Now it seemed as though the both of us were treading uncharted territory.

  He shook himself out of the quiet. “Do you want something to drink? I don't have much to choose from. Water or Dr. Pepper.”

  “No, thanks, I’m good. Huh, I didn’t expect this to be so weird,” I chuckled nervously.

  “Oh, is it weird? I hadn’t noticed,” Preston deadpanned.

  I couldn’t resist sticking my tongue out. “Very funny. But I’m really glad I’m not the only one who thinks so."

  He reached out and tugged my hand, pulling me toward the couch. “Come on weirdo. Have a seat. Then we can talk about why you’re here. Besides missing me, I mean.”

  We sat on the couch together, with Preston pulling my legs and setting them over his lap. He started massaging my feet. I tried tugging them out of his grip, but he only tightened his hold.

  "Just sit there and relax."

  Knowing it was easier to let him have his way than to resist, I sat back against the arm of the couch so he could continue. It wasn't long before I let out a sigh of contentment. Soon, I started getting drowsy, and my eyes grew heavy. I was vaguely aware of my surroundings. I was jostled and my eyes fluttered. It felt like I was moving, but the warmth cocooning me made me close them again.

  The strong scent of spring and sunshine filled my nose. My gaze darted around until it landed on Preston. He was shirtless and propped up against his headboard reading through some files. The lamp on his bedside table was lit casting a soft glow around the room. I shifted and his eyes met mine. He smiled.

  "Hello, again," he whispered.

  "Hi. Why did you let me fall asleep?" my voice was scratchy. I raised an eyebrow. “And how did I conveniently end up in your bed?”

  “For one, you looked like you needed the rest. Besides, you haven't been asleep long. Thirty minutes maybe. And for two, the last bed we were in was yours. I figured I’d share mine this time.”

  “I bet.” I chuckled and tucked my hands under my chin. I stared up at him. “What are you working on?"

  Preston flipped the papers. "I'm going over surveillance photos of Felipe and Cruz. There are a couple guys in a few of these pictures, but I don't know if they're our suppliers or not."

  “If they are, we’ll find them."

  "I know we will.” He glanced down at me with a sigh and closed the folder before setting it aside. “I've just never been long on patience."

  "I don't know. You've been pretty patient with me."

  He smiled a little smugly. "I have, haven't I?"

  I huffed out a small laugh.

  Preston's expression shifted and turned serious again. "Can I ask you a question?"

  "Sure," I replied nervously.

  "What were you doing at the hotel that night?"

  I should have expected this. There didn't seem to be much that Preston hadn't shared with me about his life. It was only reasonable that with this step forward in our...relationship, that he wouldn't wa
nt to know things about me and mine. I just wasn't ready to give him all the answers he was looking for. Not yet. I could still give him part of the truth, if not all of it.

  "It was the anniversary of my father's death."

  He scooted down until he too lay on his side facing me. He reached out and brushed my hair back. "I'm sorry."

  I shrugged. "It's been twenty-one years and it never gets any easier."

  "You must have been young when it happened."

  "Thirteen."

  "That's a rough age to lose a parent. Were the two of you close?"

  "Not really. He and my mother had divorced the year before. She’d had full custody, but he took her to court for partial custody. It was pretty ugly. In the end, he won, and I was to spend my summer breaks with him. My dad had a lot of...mental health issues."

  "Still, it's hard losing a parent. I never knew my dad. He left right before I was born. Brody filled the void, so I never really missed him. But my mom. I miss her every single day. It only makes it worse knowing that I'm the reason she's not here.”

  It was eerie how similar our sins were.

  "What made you decide to work for the D.E.A.?"

  I blinked at the change in topic and relaxed muscles I'd tightened unconsciously. This was a much safer line of questioning. "My mom had remarried shortly before my dad’s death, and when I was fifteen, my step-dad got a job offer in D.C. So, we left Chicago. After I graduated high school, I stayed in D.C. and ended up going to Georgetown University." I chuckled. "Can you believe I was actually thinking about becoming a lawyer?"

  Preston's eyes widened. "You? A lawyer?"

  "Yeah. I'd been considering some type of law enforcement, but I didn't want to necessarily be a police officer. I worked toward my degree in criminal justice. During one of my classes, I did a research paper on the Drug Enforcement Administration, and immediately, I was intrigued. As soon as I finished my paper, I knew exactly what I wanted to do.” I shrugged. “I went on to get my Bachelor's, with a major in Criminal Justice and a minor in statistics. Then I got my Master’s. Once I graduated, I applied to work for the D.E.A. Took me over a year to be accepted. I went through the training and graduated from Quantico at the top of my class."

  "When did you meet my brother? He never told me. I knew you'd been his handler, but that was about it."

  I covered my face with my hand. “I’d moved back to Chicago and was four, maybe five, months out of Quantico. Director Gibson told me he needed to see me. I was scared shitless. He’s an intimidating bastard. I thought for sure I was being fired already. I walked into his office and there stood this dark and intensely brooding man.”

  Preston laughed. “Intensely brooding sounds exactly like Brody.”

  “Lord was he ever. Anyway, Gibson introduced us. Your brother had been assigned a handler already, but for a reason only the two of them knew, he asked for someone else.”

  "And you were that someone else." It wasn't a question.

  "Apparently so. He explained in explicit detail what my job would be, and how his life was, essentially, in my hands. I almost pissed myself. I mean, that was a lot of responsibility for someone who hadn't even been on the job half a year.”

  "Everything obviously worked out, since you're both still here."

  "I guess so."

  "Do you enjoy what you do?"

  I thought about the question. “I don’t know that anyone really enjoys it. Day in and day out we see almost the worst of humanity. The drugs. The death. The continuous need for power and money, no matter who gets hurt in the process. It’s a lot. I will admit to a rush of excitement each time we go out on a seizure. It feeds the adrenaline junkie in me. I also get a sense of satisfaction when the bad guys get what’s coming to them. But in the full sense of enjoyment from my job, I'm not sure that I do."

  "Well, Brody has nothing but respect for you. He doesn't trust a lot of people, but I know you're close to the top of the list."

  "Your brother trusted me with his life without even knowing me. No way was I letting him down. I didn't want his death on my conscience."

  He leaned over and ghosted a kiss across my lips. "I trust you with my life, as well."

  "I hope I don't let you down."

  Preston shook his head. "Not a chance."

  His earlier question had me curious as well. “What about you? You never told me why you were at the hotel."

  "I was part of the construction crew in charge of the hotel renovations. It's one of the few jobs I'm actually qualified for that my sponsor can usually find for me every time I get out of rehab. I don’t love it, but it’s better than sitting on my ass staring at a computer all day. I needed something that kept me busy."

  I nodded. "I completely understand. After your brother resigned from the organization, I decided to switch from being an agent on the streets to an intelligence analyst. I was good at my new position, but I didn't have the passion for it like I did being a field agent."

  “Earlier that day, while I was on my break, I went into the bathroom. One of the guys from the crew was in there doing a line. He turned and offered me some.”

  I couldn’t hold back my gasp.

  “As you know, I never hide my scars, so it wasn’t a big secret that I used. Or at least that I used to. Either way, I turned him down. He shrugged it off and went back to work as though nothing had happened. But the rest of the day, all I could think about was seeing him take that hit.”

  “Did you tell anyone what he’d done?”

  Preston's expression said that was a dumb question. “I wasn’t a narc. Besides, I needed that job, and it was my word against his. He’d been there longer and had a lot of friends. After work was over, I knew if I left that hotel, the first thing I’d do was track down my old dealer. I stayed there with the hopes that I could quiet the urge. That’s when I saw you.”

  I stared at him. How different things would have been for both of us if Preston hadn't been there that night. I wasn't sure I believed in fate or destiny, but there had to be a reason why he was placed in my path. “And now? Do you still have the urges?”

  It was a question I wasn’t sure I wanted the answer to.

  “I won’t lie and say no. Sometimes, though not often, the urge is constant, picking at me like a scab. Nearly all the time, it’s quietly simmering beneath the surface, but instead of a mighty roar, it’s a soft whisper I can usually tune out. There’s been the rare occasion when they completely disappear, if only temporarily.”

  “Like when?”

  “Usually when I’m with you. That night, for instance. The minute I saw you, they crept away. I didn’t notice until right before I was about to leave. Before you asked me to stay, I’d been sitting in that bar for hours, watching you, and not once did I think about using.”

  “You watched me for hours? And you called me a weirdo?” I poked him in the chest. It was a little disconcerting that I’d been oblivious enough to my surroundings that Preston had observed me for so long and I hadn’t even noticed.

  Even in the pale light, I saw his cheeks flush. “I admit it was slightly creeper behavior, but I couldn’t help it. Something about you drew me in, and I couldn’t stop. I didn’t even think about leaving. All I wanted to do was find out what was bothering you, and make it go away.”

  I reached out and cupped his cheek. “That’s exactly what you did. You made my pain go away. I felt a little guilty about putting that burden on you. It wasn’t really fair of me.” My eyes scanned his face. “I’m glad I did it, though. Otherwise, I don’t think we’d be here. In this place. Together.”

  Preston pulled me tight against him and pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “I don’t know. Something tells me we still would have met.”

  I cuddled closer, inhaling the scent that was all him. “I think you’re probably right.”

  But would I still feel like I was falling in love?

  Chapter 22

  “Good morning.”

  I turned at the sound
of Landon’s sleepy voice. Even with bed head and covering her mouth with a yawn, she still made my heart skip a beat. “Morning. Kinda hoping you’re not a coffee drinker, because I don’t have any. I do have milk and cereal though.”

  She sent me a lazy smile. God, I could wake up to her every day. “I am a coffee drinker, but I’ll grab a cup on my way to work. There’s a coffee shop on the corner.”

  “I know. That might have been where I’d done a little stakeout waiting for you to get off work the day I followed you to the train station.” I sent her an abashed smile.

  Her eyes widened and she placed her hands on her hips. “Seriously, Preston? You really are quite the stalker, aren’t you?”

  I just shrugged. “What can I say? I get what I want any way I can.”

  Landon moved to stand next to me in the kitchen and poured herself some cereal in the bowl I’d left her. She hip-bumped me. “Hand me that milk, you creeper.”

  We ate in companionable silence, and then she helped me wash the dishes. “What do you have planned for the day?”

  “I’ve got some more reconnaissance to do. I think I found another lead, this one to our Mr. King. I also need to head over to the rec center. Lucas called me yesterday. He’s having a bit of trouble and wanted to talk. Not sure what it’s about yet. He was awfully cagey. What about you?”

  Landon fidgeted. “I talked to King yesterday.”

  I straightened. “What? Where?”

  She bit my lip nervously. “At Monteverde.”

  “What aren’t you telling me?” I didn’t like the way she avoided meeting my eyes.

  “He was there with two guys that looked like muscle.” She paused. “There might have been a veiled warning before he left about interfering with his business.”

  I slammed the dish towel on the counter. “Why the hell are you just now telling me this? You had all night.”

  “Because I didn’t want you to worry. My boss already knows what happened.”

  A sickening sensation settled in my gut. “How could I not worry, Landon? Jesus.”